Thursday, 9:05 a.m., Farmington, CT
Alice Roberts
The news was in all the morning headlines.
Pulsar Nanotech had been taken over by Saber Life Sciences, a foreign-owned pharmaceutical that had sprung up out of nowhere, seemingly overnight.
Alice Roberts took the Farmington exit off I-84, listening to the details of the deal on NPR’s ‘Morning Edition.’ The business expert being interviewed was saying no one had heard of Saber before this bombshell. To date, the Qatar-based company had only two products to its name, both cheap knock-offs of popular heart medications. The big question: how could this small, virtually unknown pharmaceutical come up with the kind of capital needed to buy Pulsar? The consensus answer: Saber was really a front, a shell company representing the interests of some wealthy investor or investors.
“Any thoughts on who those investors might be?” The NPR reporter asked.
“No one knows for sure, but the smart money says Saber’s really just a vehicle for one or more sovereign wealth funds."
“To clarify: by ‘sovereign wealth funds,’ you’re referring to state-owned investment funds?”
“Correct. One concern with SWFs has always been their lack of transparency, and that’s certainly been the case here. No one knows for sure where Saber’s funding is coming from.”
“Well, given the fact that the company is based in Qatar, wouldn’t the Abu Dhabi Investment Authority be the most logical candidate?”
The expert cleared his throat. “Not necessarily. Both the Kuwaitis and the Saudi Arabian Monetary Agency have invested heavily in the biotech sector recently, so... wouldn’t be surprised…”
The voice faded out, NPR being replaced by a twangy Southern voice singing about lonely love. Roberts wasn’t a big country fan, but she had to admit the mellow tune soothed her frayed nerves. Hell, it was certainly more relaxing than hearing about the unfolding Pulsar drama.
She didn’t need to know the details to understand this was bad news. If some foreign company had just swallowed Pulsar, that meant the planned East Haven facility would be put on hold, or even worse, scrapped. Which meant Redmond would be on the warpath.
Sure enough, when she reached the office, Samir reported the Governor had already called twice.
She frowned, settling into her desk. “If he calls again, tell him I’m out, and if that doesn’t work, just tell him to fire me.”
The Governor didn’t have the authority to do that, of course, but the board did, and since he appointed most members of the board, Roberts knew she was on borrowed time. She also knew she’d be resigning long before that asshole got the chance to fire her.
“Any word on the hit-and-run?” Patel asked as she sorted through her stack of mail.
“She’s still critical, but holding on.”
“That’s good news.”
“I suppose.” Roberts squinted into the sunlight streaming through her narrow office window. “But the chances of that girl making a meaningful recovery are still pretty slim. With her injuries, she’s got a steep hill to climb.”
Patel looked down, acknowledging the depressing truth of her words. “So,” he announced, trying to brighten his voice. “We’ve got some guests.”
“Oh?” Roberts crumpled a piece of junk mail and tossed it into the garbage bin. “I didn’t know we were expecting anyone.”
The Deputy Chief handed her a business card:
PULSAR NANOTECHNOLOGIES
Julia Swain, Chief Scientific Liaison
“She’s here with Chuck Fulsom and Bridget Allen. You remember Pulsar’s PR team, right? They’re in the conference room now, waiting with the Replacidin specs. I also asked them to bring some EM images for us to compare with the ones Sneddon just sent over from the U Conn Lab.”
The electron microscopy images. She'd forgotten about those. Redmond would flip when he learned she hadn’t cancelled those expensive tests after getting the anaphylaxis results. She smiled, picturing the Governor’s bulldog face going all red and blotchy when he got the news. What do you mean you haven’t closed the case yet? What the fuck are you waiting for?
“We got those already?” she asked in surprise. EM usually took a week, minimum.
“They came in earlier this morning. You wanted them rush, remember?”
“And?”
“Well, um…” Patel loosened his tie, owl eyes blinking. “The images are somewhat… surprising.”
“Meaning?”
“It’s probably better if you see for yourself.”
***
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Okay, the next chapter - hereeee we go!
Uh oh, out of Jake's head again... So you know I'm groaning... : )
Pulsar Nanotech had been taken over by Saber Life Sciences, a foreign-owned pharmaceutical that had sprung up out of nowhere, seemingly overnight.>> sounds like Royboy to me ; )
“Well, given the fact that the company is based in Qatar, wouldn’t the Abu Dhabi Investment Authority be the most logical candidate?” ~The expert cleared his throat. “Not necessarily. Both the Kuwaitis and the Saudi Arabian Monetary Agency have invested heavily in the biotech sector recently, so... wouldn’t be surprised…” >> don't think you need these two paras. I'm a bit concerned that you spring into 'telling' mode with more than a teeny bit of the radio broadcast. Also, NPR might be a little too esoteric for your intended audience. Big news like this should be on CNN and Fox
Hey Gray,
Okay, it's probably because I'm old with a pea brain, but I was lost at the end. I don't recall the test you refer to. Again, my memory, not your writing.
Is this the first time we've been in Alice's pov? I can't remember. Anyway, if it is, readers will probably jump you for bringing it in so late in the book. I did the same thing one time and they nailed me on it.
Now, I know why I had her name wrong. I know someone named Alice Wilson who happens to be married to a doctor!!...That's why I recalled Dr. Wilson in place of Roberts!! My poor brain. Doesn't function half the time.
I've speculated in the past someone may have caused the death in order to drive the value down of the company and then swoop in and buy it for pennies. We'll see.
This was a short chapter, but held needed info...I think. Depending on the chapters ahead, you may be able to work this in somewhere else.
~Ann
Gray,
I woke this morning utterly delighted to find 2 chapters to read!!! Happy day.
I actually felt my pulse racing while I read this. I am so invested in Jake's welfare. I love the way you're spinning this. I'm getting to the point where I want to call out to the characters, "No! You're all wrong!" That's always a great sign. (But I confess there have been times that I'm such a wus that I have to put a book down when I see things going out of control for a hero I care about. Edith Wharton has that effect one me. Weird, eh?)
I have absolutely no comments about your writing, because I'm so caught up in the story. Now for the next chapter....can't wait.
Simi
Aaaah Gray,
You left me hanging...! I decided to read this chapter and then get back to my story - What Price Love - and do some more editing, and now I have to read on to see what they found out...!! Good job...!
I really like that you are making this CME human, cuz they don't always get a good rap... Okay, on to the next one...
Happy Writing... Keep Smilin'.... Jax
Hello, I think it's important to have these chapters that keep us aware of what Dr. Roberts is doing. They come infrequently so it's hard to keep track of the details. In this case I don't remember where she ordered these electron microscopy studies. I remember the ELISA tests but not the electron microscopy. I don't know if you could add a detail or two about how, why or when she ordered these tests but if you did it might help.
Good scientist hook at the end.
Nits: [delete], (add).
<No one('s) [knows for] sure where Saber’s funding is coming from.”>
<She didn’t need [to know] the details to understand this was bad news.>
Hey, Gray - Damn, you took me away from Choi about to reveal what she found. But your delay came with another cliff hanger concerning the EM report. Now I've got to read still another chapter today!
- The voice faded out, NPR being replaced by... {If Roberts switched stations or popped in a CD, wouldn't the voice suddenly stop, rather than fade out?}
That's my only contribution to this chapter. On to the next.
Take care,
Jack
Gray.....Another nice chapter. Of course as you know I miss our favorite main character but I like that you put these chapters in for other POV's. They give us needed insight as to what is going on with other characters in the story. Altho this was short I did feel that it moved the story forward and as I have learned that is the main purpose of all writing. To keep the reader reading and to want them to read more, and you have def. done that with this story....Happy writing....Denise
Hi Gray,
Another good chapter. The story is rolling now and I can see the pieces falling into place. I keep wondering if there is going to be a twist because the Roy Caulder angle seems so obvious.
The writing is great and I am sucked in. I'm still not clear if you need to shift to Jean's POV but I suspect you will need her for the ending (or maybe you already told me that). I'll let you know more as I read on.
- C
Author
Reply
Thanks, Cobber. You'll see my dilemma, since I built this story on a multiple POV foundation. There are some things that Jake alone could not know/see that are essential to the plot; if I tried to build these plot elements only through his eyes, it might come across as contrived (i.e. the "fly-on-the-wall" scenario where he happens to overhear a critical conversation between Alice Roberts and her team, etc...). It's so hard to change the fundamental structure of a story once you've built it up. You were wise to go with multiple POVs in third person for "State of Vengeance" from the start! Gray
Hello, Gray. Of course the Leviathan was going to live on...and my, how long it is...reaches VERY far...not until it's slain with the sword, will people like Alice Roberts be able to relax.
Very nice cliffhanger ending. Were I not tired today, I'd dash off to the next...I'm going to grab something to eat and then catch some shuteye. Call it a long nap or a short session of sleep.
I'll be back later:-)
Peace,
Mike
Author
Reply
You're certainly in the home stretch now, Mike. Thanks so much for taking so much time and showing so much interest in this one. Inspires me to work on it some more, perhaps with an eye toward a new round of queries. Take care, Gray
I'm reserving judgment on the Alice chapters, but there seems to be a big twist a comin'. Does Jake even have a lawyer at this point? Should he have one at this meeting? I guess we'll find out what it is in the next chapter? Will be moving on...
Lauren
Author
Reply
Alice is working behind the scenes, coming up with some of the scientific clues that will exonerate Jake in the end and reveal Roy's (and the Greenbecks') evil scheme. Still not sure how I can show this through Jake's POV, but maybe there's a way.
Thanks,
Gray
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GPyrenees