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Just a point. I believe Rhiannon breaks the 4th wall in chapter 1, but, like someone in the other forum said, 1st person narration already breaches the wsll, so I can't be sure.

I found it, will read it all later, when my full internet is restored.  I write naked too; it helps me relate to my character.  Besides, clothes are a bother.

That's Caroline Alexander.  Oops.

Norm, Dan, CJ, Suin:  I have rewritten "World's End."  It's less sketchy, and there are more details about the "place,"tRhiannon is visiting.  It's now about 2,300 words, so more robust. Some more archetypes.  I tie the sex scene to the denouement of Part I, which none of you have read yet, and make it about life (the feminine) and death (not necessarily the masculine).  I've switched around some dialogue to be more consistent with the characters, added another sketchy component to Heather's character. Lido has more lines.  There is more drama where Norm wanted.  Rosalyn is still missing from the chapter. (The character was offered a role in a short story, took it, but will be back.)  I've done it as an edit, so if you read it, there will be no additional points, (sorry, Norm) but I do appreciate it when you all go the extra mile for me.  I try to do the same for you and hope you appreciate my reviews of your work as much as I appreciate yours of mine.

Thanks for the responses, guy.  Don't worry, Suin, there is a lot more not posted.  And the alpha is your first draft, your beta would be your first full draft, still rough but you could publish it.  Then there is the finished draft.  Borrowed from software.

Great work, Sol. I guess I missed this whole kerfuffle, but am glad the side of law and order won.

Welcome to the site, Kay Marile.

Karin:  Thanks for your review.  I've posted a re-edited version that incorporated some of your suggestions.  More humor, and although the theme of shock about her immodesty was kept, I added enough to show that the main concern was her being naked in ice and snow.  I even used the tarp, which created a funny visual of four men running alongside her with a tarp.  If the book weren't already at the point where it might fission into two, I might go into more detail about the Western culture; have her stay a few days.  What do you think?

You have a point, but some of the best SF out there is "fanfic."  Paramount even made a cottage industry out of fans writing Star Trek novels, and some are as good, imo, as the original writing.  And where does fanfic end and continuation begin?  The new Nero Wolf, James Bond, and Peter Whimsy stories are really very good, although I admit, Archie is a bit more self-conscious, Bond takes a lot of time cleaning his gun in the first one (the scene could be a manual for how to do it), and I'm still waiting to see how a completely original story progresses for Peter and Harriet.