Three
“Las Vegas? You’re kidding, right?”
Las Freaking Vegas? Shit! That’s the last place on Earth I ever wanted to go to again. Well, maybe I wanted to go back, but I knew I should avoid it like a whore shuns confession. Is God getting back at me for all the bad things I’ve done in my life? Scary thought.
“Yes, Las Vegas. Is that a problem? Hell, I’d love to go.”
“It’s not one of my favorite places.”
“Sorry about that. But information we discovered earlier today strongly suggests he’s booked at the Players Choice Casino through Saturday night. When you hear all the details, you’ll understand why we think Bishop’s our man. See ya in a little while.”
She hung up before I could reply, although I’m not sure what I would have said. I rolled my eyes and sighed. Las Vegas. Really? I guess even God has to get his jollies once in a while.
I reset my emotions and then checked my watch—two hours before my appointment with Butler Farms. I decided to visit Alice’s sister, Donna Forsythe. It was a short drive—a little further east on Truxtun Avenue, turn left and then right after a couple of blocks to Camino Primavera, a real nice part of East Bakersfield. It’s the neighborhood I grew up in. I pulled into Donna’s driveway and parked.
She wasn’t coping well, said her parents were totally devastated. I could only try to imagine the horror of a parent losing a child. My visit was brief. They needed more time before a formal interview. I was grieving, also, but had a job to complete.
Following a calm lunch at Carl’s Jr. on the corner of Auburn and Oswell Streets, I kicked back for a few minutes. I needed that downtime, even if it was no more than a brief romance with a double cheeseburger, onion rings and a Coke at a fast food joint.
After trashing my sandwich wrapper and soda cup, I contacted my brother. Max had been a Kern County Deputy Sheriff for eight years. His number was third on my contact list.
“Hey, Sis. Ya doing okay?”
“Not really. I’m dreading Alice’s funeral tomorrow.”
“What a damn shame. Really sad.” He paused for a few seconds. “You just need to talk, or is there anything else I can do for you? Either way, I’m all ears.”
I blew out a breath of frustration and anger. “Does the Sheriff’s Department have anything on Alice’s murder? Even the smallest clue might help.”
“Sorry, but we got nothing. It’s being handled by the Bakersfield folks, not the county. We’re not involved unless they ask us for help, which they haven’t.”
“That’s what I figured. Thought I’d ask anyway.”
“Tell you what. I’ll speak with Jim Jankowski at the police department. He and I are pretty tight. If he knows anything, I’m sure he’d tell me.”
“You da best, Max.”
“So I’ve heard. Now, if I get anything from Jankowski, you didn’t hear it from me.”
“Of course not. Love ya. And give my love to that beautiful fiancée of yours. You’re lucky to have found a girl like Natalie.”
“I’ll relay your greeting. And yeah, I am lucky. Love ya, too.”
I checked the time on my phone before I dropped it into my purse—almost one-thirty.
I parked Patsy in the Butler Farms side parking lot and climbed the stairs to Anna Flores’ second-story office. She noticed me through the glass insert in the door and motioned me in.
I took a seat at her cluttered and scraped desk. Talk about a dismal office—olive green walls, dingy gray floor tiles, two metal desks, several old file cabinets, and a few chairs looking like they came from a 1950s doctor’s waiting room. Even the two windows overlooked a drab parking lot.
“So, whatcha got on this guy?”
Anna pulled a manila folder from the top drawer of her desk and pushed it across to me. “I made copies for you.”
“Thanks.”
I glanced through the papers. He’d been hired from Grafton Produce, Butler’s biggest competitor. Forty-two years old, six feet tall and two hundred pounds. A file photo showed him with thinning blond hair and a noticeable scar on his right cheek in the shape of a nearly perfect “U”. Interesting—I wonder how that might have happened. No record of arrests or convictions. Just two recent DUIs.
“So, what makes you think Andy Bishop is our guy?” I took a closer look at his photo and burned it into memory.
“He was making good money at Grafton Farms—more than we’re paying him. I find it odd he would leave money on the table and years of seniority to come here to do the same thing. Sounds fishy as hell to me. They gave him a good recommendation. You’d have to talk to Darlene Watson at HR about that. Still, I say something’s a little off."
Anna leaned back in her chair and stretched her arms over her head. “He worked for us as a data analyst. The position allowed him access to most of our operational details. Everyone else in that office has been a loyal employee for at least five years, most of them a lot longer. I have no reason to suspect any of them. And Bishop often stayed late without being asked.”
“Interesting—the staying late thing.”
“Yeah, real interesting. If the extra effort had been needed, that would have been great. But Lupe Santiago, his supervisor, said there was no reason for him to stay late. Last week, just a few days before he failed to show, she told him he’d have to leave at the normal quitting time. I’m thinking he might be a mole for Grafton and his after-hours work was to benefit that arrangement.”
“Makes sense. I’ll check it out. Now, tell me why you think he’s in Vegas.”
“This morning, Lupe had the IT people check his emails and browsing history.They found a reservation confirmation from the Players Choice Hotel And Casino in his emails. His browsing history showed he'd visited their site several times. I’d bet my paycheck that’s where he is.”
I gripped the time-worn armrests and pushed myself from the chair. “Thanks a bunch; I appreciate the info. I’ll leave for Vegas tomorrow afternoon.”
“How about this evening? It would be a shame if he checked out early and we missed him.”
“My best friend’s funeral is tomorrow morning. I’ll leave after that. That’s the earliest I can get away.”
Anna nodded. “Sorry to hear about your friend.”
“Yeah, me too. Thanks.” I sucked in some stale air and blew it out. “I’ll get back to you when I have something worth telling.”
Bishop’s file in hand, I left the building and headed to my car. As I opened Patsy’ door, I thought about Alice’s funeral. I decided to take the rest of the day off and chill out somewhere.
Pop! Zing! Thunk!
A bullet whizzed by my ear and hit the next car over. I dropped to one knee between Patsy and the car struck by the bullet. I waited—nothing else for the next thirty seconds.
I peeked over Patsy’s hood, my knee still planted on the pavement. The barking of tires and the roar of a powerful engine blasted from the front of the building. Feeling it was safe, I ran to the street, probably seventy-five or eighty feet; but the vehicle was gone by the time I arrived. A faint drift of swirling blue smoke was the only evidence the shooter had been there. As the blue haze dissipated, my nose reminded me burnt rubber wasn’t a pleasant smell.
Why in the hell is someone shooting at me?
I went back to Patsy and cranked her engine. As her three hundred horses hummed under the hood, I had a disturbing thought.
Maybe I was the intended target at the bistro, not Alice.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Good Chance For Bad Luck - Main Character List
Olivia Michelle Grace ------- Rookie PI and millionaire
Alice Milner: -------------- Olivia’s best friend and murder victim
Patsy -------------------- Olivia's fire engine red 1959 Cadillac convertible
Robert Milner: ------------ Alice’s ex and primary suspect in her death
Andy Bishop: -------------- Sabotage suspect at Butler Farms
Ron Matthews: ------------ Olivia’s friend and possible love interest
Linda Sears: -------------- Olivia’s friend and housekeeper
Max Grace: --------------- Olivia’s brother and Kern County Deputy Sheriff
© Copyright 2025 Sideman. All rights reserved.
Regular reviews are a general comments about the work read. Provide comments on plot, character development, description, etc.
In-line reviews allow you to provide in-context comments to what you have read. You can comment on grammar, word usage, plot, characters, etc.
First off, I love the title! That alone draws the reader to pick up a book. The dialogue is easy to follow and fast paced. The main character, Olivia, is likable and believable. As a reader I fell empathy and feel like I know her and could easily be friendly with her. The entire tone of this chapter is fast but the reader definitely wants to go along for the ride. It is very helpful having the 'cast of characters". I need to remember to include one.
Hi
Thank you very much for time you gave me to read this chapter., I sure do appreciate it. And thank you, also, for the effort you put into your review. I'm glad it all seems to work for you and that Olivia is "your kind of character". The novel is fairly fast-paced in most places, but there are slower times in order to give the reader a chance to "breathe" and take it all in.
The kind words and encouragement are greatly appreciated.
Alan
Yep, I'd say it flows very well. No boring parts or snags. Grammar, punctuation, and spelling, far as I can tell, seem fine.
So Olivia's going to Vegas, which she hates. Going to be interesting watching what happens there.
The chapter-ending is an excellent hook!
Can't think of much else to say at this time, Alan, except keep posting the chapters:-)
CHEERS!!
Mike
Thanks Mike. I appreciate all that. Gklad you're enjoying the story.
I'll be over to read more of your short stories soon. Because of my time constraints, I have to pick a couple of authors each day and with8 or 10 I'm reading, the cycle come arounds to each author every few days.
Best to you,
ALan
Gave up on the inline review.
When you mention Bishop, why not say: "Bishop's booked at the...
Then say "he" in the second last line in that paragraph.
Love:" After I reset . . .; a brief romance with a double . . .
Description of her brother could be tightened. Maybe: "Max, at thirty-two, three years my senior, loved his job . . .
Watch misplaced modifiers: I took a seat across from her desk, a nicked and scraped affair.
When she leaves the office, the "See ya" sounds like overkill.
How about: . . .between Patsy and the car that had been hit.
I like: reminded me burnt rubber wasn't ... (Your PI humor is perfect.)
Good chapter--fast-paced, really connecting to the characters; good plot keeps me reading.
All About Connection (judy)
Hi Judy,
Thanks for the time effort you put into your reviews. I sincerely appreciate it. I'm going to start catching up on my reading tomorrow and the rest of the week - you're on my list.
I pretty much agree with all you said. I'll make those corrections here on the site in a couple of days and they will go into my next revision. everything you annotated will make this a better chapter - much appreciated!
Alan
Hi Alan.
The chapter flows well. No hitches I could see.
You have a good ending for the chapter, but I was surprised no one came out at the sound of the gunshot.
Yes, it appears she might have been the intended target. She must be close to something and doesn't know it.
Well done.
Charley
Thank you Charley!
I think you make an excellent point that the short didn't attract more attention from others. I'll go back and address that - easy fix. Thanks!
Good to see "no hitches"! I've worked very hard on this rewrite. Your encouraging review is very much appreciated. I'll be over to read you very late tonight. See ya then. And thanks again.
Alan
Alan--
Omg...it never occurred to me that Olivia might have been the target? Now I'm wondering why. It is a disgruntled lover? Bad guy she put away? Or the bad guy she's looking into now? You know how to shake up a story. The story flowed pretty damn good, and I am, as usual with all your characters, invested in Olivia and what happens to her.
I got no suggestions on how to make this better! LOVED IT! dags:)
Hi Dags,
Somehow, I missed this review on multiple occasions. Damn - getting old really sucks (will be 72 in the not-too-distant future - YIKES!!!).
You never know, until you read most of the novel, of course, who the real target is and I think many folks will be surprised to find out who the killer is.
Thanks for the many very nice comments! And hey, I'm really liking your Sausalito venture, too! You tell a damned good story!z
Alan
G. P. Alano