There's a petition on change.org to redo the whole final season. They were going for 35K signatures but have already exceeded a million. There's also a petition for Disney to remake the Star Wars prequel trilogy. If they do, I hope they hire the same director who did The Last Jedi. The internet would explode with dark side rage.
1,602 2019-05-16 23:10:49
Topic: One of Tim Conway's best ad libs (2 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
You may have heard that Tim Conway passed away recently at the age of 85. He was a big comedian when I was young, part of the Carol Burnett show. They would do comedy sketches where they were supposed to stay in character and not laugh. Problem was, Tim Conway used to ad lib and make sh*t up to make the other actors laugh. The link below is probably their funniest skit. Vicki Lawrence played a recurring character called Mama, who was a no-nonsense bitch in these skits. Carol Burnett (sitting next to Tim Conway) was always trying to get the other actors to be serious in the skits and not laugh. The last line from Mama was a riot. Keep in mind that this was in the early 70's, and you couldn't swear on TV, so this unedited version wasn't aired until much later.
1,603 2019-05-15 03:07:06
Re: Outlines or Treatments? (6 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I just tried publishing a short story containing part of my book's outline, including multiple levels of bullets. The site handled it perfectly.
1,604 2019-05-14 16:43:05
Re: GOT-Tennis anyone? (30 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Cersei: haha! I'm the villain you've hated for years. Arya thinks she can kill me? Bring your worst
Later: *randomly trips down stairs and dies*
I haven't watched the show and may never do so, but an arch villain dying by tripping down stairs sounds like something you would write. Have you forgotten your elevator full of restaurant patrons who escaped a mass killing from assault weapons only to plunge to their deaths in the elevator? And all that in a romance novel. I cheered the whole time.
1,605 2019-05-14 04:07:23
Re: Outlines or Treatments? (6 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Also, if you want to do brainstorming beyond what you can get from simple reviews create a discussion thread with the topic "story name - pen name" in the Medieval/Fantasy Magic group. I know that's a weird place to put it, but I don't know of any other active groups besides that one and Premium. A bunch of us hang out there when we really should be writing.
1,606 2019-05-14 03:57:53
Re: Outlines or Treatments? (6 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Not really, although my outlines takes the form of nested bullets in Word. Whatever your format, try posting it as a short story and see if the structure survives the cut and paste. Short stories feature prominently on the home page, so you should get good visibility. Don't forget to set the genre. And review other people's work to build ongoing relationships and get more reviews in return.
1,607 2019-05-08 19:52:30
Re: Giving extra points for reviews (12 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Mariana, I'm not sure I understand your proposed approach. Are you saying we should offer up extra points to anyone who reviews a piece? That could quickly bankrupt the generous publisher of the piece and wouldn't guarantee that they get better reviews, just more of them.
My own idea was the ability to simply transfer some points to a particular person as an added thanks for extra effort, whether for one particularly helpful review or for long-term mentoring. It would be simple to build. Simply pick a connection, select how many of your points to give, add a thank you note, and the transfer is made.
1,608 2019-05-08 18:20:48
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,492 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
One of my reviewers mentioned that I hadn't described anyone in my first 2 or 3 scenes before I took them down to rewrite. I'm curious to see what Seabrass says about the above description. I thought the version that Ann flagged was simpler, but it's "technically" not a way someone would think of their hair, so I made it more explicit with this version. Some people want me to be explicit while others, like Temple, call me pedantic. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't like this version. She already told me to lose the one I had written in v1.
What do you think, am I better off having Romano look in a mirror to clean himself up?
1,609 2019-05-08 16:31:24
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,492 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
And the winner is:
As he passed under an air vent, the heating system spewed dust on him. He glared at the ceiling as he did his best to shake the gray particles out of what had been coal-black hair only moments earlier.
1,610 2019-05-08 16:11:55
Re: Can a deep, rumbling voice cackle? - Characterization (10 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Thanks, JP. I dropped cackle in favor of "demonic" chuckle. Lynn suggested using demonic as a way to avoid having to explicitly state that the intruder was a demon. It follows naturally from his description and the demonic chuckle.
1,611 2019-05-08 11:51:28
Re: Giving extra points for reviews (12 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Would that we could. I've made similar suggestions in the past and they got shot down each time. I would love to be able to reward specific reviewers who take a huge amount of time doing detailed reviews of my work, even though they could just drop five comments in an inline review and leave. The best way to deal with the points economy on the site is to give detailed/helpful reviews to those individuals you want to acquire/keep as reciprocal reviewers.
1,612 2019-05-08 03:30:10
Re: Can a deep, rumbling voice cackle? - Characterization (10 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I'm more familiar with the Emperor in Star Wars. There were times, especially in the 3rd prequel, where he had a deep voice, but his cackle became iconic. I wonder if they used special effects to deepen his voice in certain scenes.
It's a minor issue in one scene , so I'll stick with a deep voice. That also works better than a higher pitch given who the mysterious demon actual is.
Thanks, Bill
1,613 2019-05-08 01:53:17
Re: Can a deep, rumbling voice cackle? - Characterization (10 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
It's not something I had planned to do, but one of my reviewers suggested a demonic cackle for the dark figure in scene 1.2 (show, don't tell), which I thought was good at the time, but when I read it with the edits included, I realized the disconnect.
Thank you, Temple.
Dirk
1,614 2019-05-08 00:28:26
Topic: Can a deep, rumbling voice cackle? - Characterization (10 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I'm trying to figure out what that would sound like and if it's even possible. It's come up in my writing.
1,615 2019-05-07 23:23:35
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,492 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
How about:
He glared at the ceiling as he did his best to shake the particles out of his hair. The last thing he needed for coal-black hair was a head-full of gray dandruff.
1,616 2019-05-07 23:16:55
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,492 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Anyone have an easy fix for this? Ann told me to lose "otherwise coal-black" in the second sentence since he shouldn't be describing himself. Seabrass will flag it, too, if he sees it. I'm trying to avoid a mirror or reflective glass, since those are considered cliches. I've tried several variations, but this is the simplest.
As Romano passed under an air vent, the heating system rained dust on him. He glared at the ceiling as he did his best to shake the gray particles out of his otherwise coal-black hair.
Thanks
Dirk
1,617 2019-05-07 23:11:12
Re: Zero point of view story? (3 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
That's second-person POV. It exists but is uncommon, at least among the books I read.
1,618 2019-05-07 22:38:51
Re: The Sorcerer's Progress (1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
It's mostly electronic with us, too, but you still need to go somewhere to get your picture taken, trade in foreign driver's licenses, take a driving test, etc. When I got back to Canada, my passport and NJ driver's license were, naturally, insufficient for me to prove that I was a resident. They wanted a statement signed by a bank officer that I had an address in Alberta. When we got back to the licensing place, they then said that's not good enough. It needed to be in an envelope sent through the mail (i.e., mailed from/to Alberta). I finally asked for a manager and they said my mother, who was with me, could swear an oath that I'm a resident, otherwise it would have been three trips and several more days of nonsense.
1,619 2019-05-07 21:35:55
Re: The Sorcerer's Progress (1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
It gets better. Today I was number 371 in the queue. That's just hilarious. They do have cable company stores for those who want to personally wring someone's neck. The easiest way to find them in a large mall is to look for angry people standing in a line that runs all the way out of the store. But, if the people in line are carrying sleeping bags, then it's probably an Apple store in September.
Years ago, the Alberta government still handled all drivers' license renewals, new drivers' licenses, etc. They had a very big building with about two hundred chairs. When they privatized many of their services, little shops opened up across Calgary. I walked in and there were only eight empty chairs and free coffee. I had barely put my butt in the chair when they called me up.
1,620 2019-05-07 14:35:55
Re: How does one get their Mojo back? (15 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Prepare to abandon ship, if needed. My Galaxy Tales trilogy (Book 1: Into the Mind of God) started out as an autobiography in 2012, morphed into a space opera in 2013, needed to be abandoned halfway through the first draft, finally became semi-logical/readable in v2 (including six months of writer's block where I did nothing but read), got relatively polished in v3, after which I concluded there was no audience for it (too religious for the non-religious and to irreverent for the religious). So, after six years, I shelved it pending a complete rewrite, which will require at least two more drafts that will takes years. I don't mind, however. I learned a lot.
In the meantime, I got inspired to write a fictional trilogy about the Book of Revelation (The Lord of the Earth). This time, I chose my target audience first (primarily Catholics, hopefully some Catholic-curious Christians, and maybe a few thriller readers). I spent a year doing detailed research (much more still to do), didn't do enough plotting (the murder/mystery element fell apart almost immediately), went back to the drawing board, had life intrude for four months with no writing, and am now partially back in the saddle trading reviews and editing early scenes. I'm sufficiently inspired by my current story that I will keep going as soon as I get my life fully reorganized. It will take me at least ten years to write the whole thing. At that pace, Galaxy Tales will probably never get done, which is too bad because some of what I wrote there is very funny, IMO.
I think Temple may be onto something. Try writing short stories and you may find something inspires you to write a new book or finish an existing one. The Lord of the Earth started that way. I wrote a short story called Connor based loosely on the Angel vampire TV series. Many people encouraged me to turn it into a book. Once I started the research, it morphed into a full-blown project, albeit with a completely different plot, setting, and ending.
1,621 2019-05-06 16:34:45
Re: Thanks! (4 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Hmm. Just checked. I can't find a monthly plan. My mistake.
1,622 2019-05-06 16:32:40
Re: Thanks! (4 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
If I remember correctly, there's a monthly plan, although it costs a little more. Try it out for a month or so before deciding on the yearly plan. I've been a member since 2012 and have learned a lot from the feedback given here, both from reviews as well as from asking newbie questions in the forums.
1,623 2019-05-01 05:35:46
Re: Game of Thrones (SPOILERSS!!!!!) (1 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
I guess that means I saved myself nine years worth of senseless drama. I wonder if it will ever come to Netflix. That might justify me keeping the service. Right now I watch maybe one movie per month and no series..
1,624 2019-04-29 20:15:35
Re: Prologue or not? (14 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
My previous book (now shelved) opened with "Battle stations!", a long chapter that was set 23 years in the past where everyone got killed. I was told to get rid of it and put all of the history and world-building info into the rest of the story. One person suggested to change it so that it was a declassified report read by one of the main characters after the story opens. Personally, I don't see what difference that would make except to interrupt the flow.
My current story started off slowly and I was told I needed a stronger opening for a thriller. When I added a prologue to do that, others told me to get rid of it. When I got rid of the prologue, someone rightly noted that I was missing danger to the MCs in the first two chapters. When I added danger, I was told it may be too much too soon. At this point, it's a first draft, so I'm going with it as written, otherwise I'll never get past chapter one.
Bottom line, I refer you back to Temple's item 4.
1,625 2019-04-28 01:21:55
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,492 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Just watched The Last Jedi for the second time. Once you ignore the fact that they threw out the rule book about how much power Jedi can have (e.g., Luke projecting himself to another part of the galaxy, Rey not needing to be trained, etc.), it's tolerable, albeit with some major weaknesses (e.g., no character arc for Snoke, Admiral Holdo waiting far too long before ramming Snoke's ship, etc.). No worse than The Force Awakens. I'll probably see the last one in a theater since it's the end of the saga. I'm looking forward to seeing how they handle Rey vs. Kylo Ren. The Legacy books had Jacen Solo fall to the Dark Side, and they killed him off. It would have been much more difficult and interesting if they had tried to redeem him. I stopped reading Star Wars books after that. I hope my stories turn out better.