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Thanks, Bill.

Nice changes. Thank you. The head-hopping police already nailed me for a few errors. I'll have to fix it before Seabrass sees it. Tsk.

It's amazing how similar Marilyn's and Temple's reviews are. They find the same stuff and even suggest the same revisions. I told them they may have been separated at birth.

As noted in a post in Premium, I keep running into a problem when referring to characters by one name only throughout my story. It's the repetition that reviewers highlight, and rightly so. Temple suggested I use more pronouns, relying on the reader to figure out who I'm referring to based on context. See the example below based on her approach. The other approach, which I used to use, is to refer to characters in more than one way. So, I would refer to Romano as Romano or priest to break up the monotony. JP Lundstrom thought that was fine, although Seabrass has tried to steer me clear of that approach. I've been trying to avoid the latter approach since I think it creates distance between the reader and Romano by referring to him as priest. For those reading this, how do you avoid the repetition?

Thanks
Dirk

Before:

After:

Cool item. According to a new in-canon Star Wars comic, Darth Sidious (aka Emperor Palpatine) impregnated Anakin Skywalker's mother without her knowledge. It would be easy to do for a Force user. This means that Anakin, Luke, and Kylo Ren are all descended from Palpatine. Without access to the comic, I don't know the details, but his tale to Anakin about Darth Plageous the Wise being able to manipulate the midichlorians to create life takes on a whole new level. It's fascinating what you can do when you toss thirty years of canon out the window.

My thanks to everyone for their thoughtful feedback. The series is intentionally focused on Catholicism, even though I hope others will read it. As a result, my gut tells me to respect Catholic traditions throughout. I'm going to go with lowercase for now and make the final decision when I've finished the first draft of the book.

Thanks
Dirk

LOL. I just finished changing them to lowercase before you posted, Memphis. I'll have to sleep on it. As I mentioned above, I like capitalizing the pronouns, but I also want to respect Catholic practices and traditions. Admittedly, I'm hoping it gets read by more than just Catholics (e.g., curious Protestants, who might expect caps in their works of religious fiction).

Thanks, everyone. The technically correct choice for Catholics is to lowercase the pronouns, although some (many?) Catholics don't realize it. The most common Catholic Bibles in North America don't capitalize the pronouns, nor does the Catechism. I like capitalizing, but the primary target audience is Catholics and the most knowledgeable folks on the Catholic.com forums say not to do it. I'll think about it some more, but I'm probably going back to lowercase.

Thanks for your help, everyone.

I should really see if anyone has ever written a simple wiki article explaining God Emperor of Dune. There were quite a few conversations in that book that went right over my head. Although I have a decent grounding in religion and politics, I never studied psychology, which seems to be a must for that book. It's my second favorite in the series after the original.

Kdot, in case your stories turn into a franchise, be sure to release a trilogy of movies with no overarching plot and three different directors. Could be worth $5 billion. Don't forget to kill off favorite characters on a whim just for the hell of it (technically, you've got that covered). Add a Smurf named Kajo who says meesa a lot, and they'll worship you.