The Sorcerer's Progress (Page 1 of 62)

Yeah, and I also realized that I ordered my Platinum Dragons in amber instead of yellow.  I've got to tweak the driver circuit; my driver and output stages are coming out of saturation with the bigger current draw.

Also found that Seiko has a better undervolt sensor than the one I've got.  I may be able to get my quiescent power draw back under budget, but it's a few more hours of tweaking.

And then I have to get back to the 3-way pigeon flasher, and the redesigned detector output.  And the physical design.  I just ordered the bottom tap I need, and I think I have at least one adhesive for the battery box.  (It works by pretreating the surfaces with heptane, which is one of the principle hydrocarbons in gasoline!)  Have to figure out where to put the status flashers.

Oh, the Pt Dragon is BRIGHT!

I still have to figure out how to associate things with this group.  And I have to put up (tiny) cover images to get that visual noise off the page.

And I need a pic.  I'm not going to throw up a snapshot, sorry.

No, she's more curmudgeon than I am.  Gotta' love her!

The output transistor is still coming out of saturation at max battery voltage.  I'll live with it.

Now to staple that copy of Ch. 2 I printed and get to work editing.

See Also: http://www.catb.org/jargon/html/B/blinkenlights.html

Postscript: for that transistor in that circuit to come out of saturation, the LED must be getting jit with about five Amps in each brief pulse!  It's spec'd for 700 milliamps, but that's continuous, not in 70 usec pulses over 600 usec apart.

Afraid of someone who's characters can kill entire cities and rip holes in the earth?

Nah.

And I have that loss of saturation on the brain.  With a MOSFET output that wouldn't be necessary.  I didn't think it would work, both because of circuit topology and because of the inherent capacitive load ... but it might.  The numbers seem well within range.

Okay, something to work on, AFTER about 6 hours on SP ch 2, which has swelled to about 4k words.

Then I test the MOSFET approach.  If it works I save  4 parts and 3 nodes, at the cost of laying the LED driver astable out again and maybe tweaking some values.  But I could really use that space.

No.  It's now bloated up.  I have to write it down.  With luck I'll have two four-hour sessions today, if I don't spend more than about three on circuit layout.  (The MOSFET output works.  It does hit limits, but I can live with these.)

I don't know how to post a pic on the forum either.  Do you mean Chapter 2 rewrite for the second book?

I have posted, and it's not showing up.  I'll have to goose Sol again.  (But first, I think, more edits.)

No, Chapter 2 on book one, the one with a very plain and enigmatic cover.  (Your grandmothers might be able to read it.)

BBcode doesn't seem to be italicizing, either.

I reread Jamen's chapter and debated going into the reasons for why I want more character, descriptions of the environment, and more teen-frustrations from Merran.  But I realize this is just a repeat of what you've been told already.  Note that this version is worlds better than your initial posts, but you keep me around to nag you into being better.  So I decided to show rather than tell.  Your style is minimalist and mine is more verbose.  However, I've tried to walk the line and limit my blather and just added parts that amplify what I'm looking for.  Hope this helps.  I've left your text intact.  Additions are added in parenthesis.

(Merran's scream echoed across the face of the rocky slope as) The lurymant flew out of sight with Shogran and his prisoners.  (In a flash of rainbow wings, her father disappeared from sight, leaving her frightened and alone.)

"What do we do now?" asked the soldier.(and grasped her hand)

(Well, almost alone.  She bit her lip and stifled a gasp.  This wasn't the time to cry.  How could she get home?  Only Mother could help recover her Dad!) 

"We don't do anything," Merran said (and tried to catch her breath.  She'd never been anywhere but (blank) world.. "I('ll) figure out how to get us home."(she promised herself more than the soldier.) She pulled free of his hand. (")Father said that Armadurn and Diannen live somewhere around here."

(Stepping away from the broken rock, she fought to steady herself on a steep slope of the shale.)

"Look, I'm sorry about the fire," the soldier said. "Those two Royals--"

"Forget the fire(attack on my home)," said Merran(snapped Merran). "Forget the Royals. I need to get us back and I need to get help for Father and Barris." What I need is to have Mother here (she thought). (A profanity hovered on the edge of her tongue) That-- A wave of horror swept over her; she had almost cursed the charm and the soldier who brought it.

(The teaching of her parents were drilled into her.) Her parents had drilled it into her for as long as she could remember: a sorcerer must never, never ever curse anyone or anything. You never knew what it might do, or when it might come back to haunt you.

She looked this soldier over. Not a Royal.  He belonged to the local garrison. He's hardly more than a boy.(she realized) (His lanky mane was cut to the shoulder and a hint of a mustashe hovered over his lip, thinner than a newborn's hair.)

Her gaze must have unsettled him. He said (asked) "Why don't I just find my own way home?"

"Because you can't," said Merran (reminding herself with the teaching words.  Whatever her parents had deemed sufficient was all that was left to get her home). "No matter how far you walk or ride, no matter how many seas you sail, you will never get home without sorcery." (This fire-world wasn't home.) No sorcerer could miss the difference, (not even her).   Back home Elemental Fire was scarce. Here it was abundant. No sorcerer here would need a HearthfireShe paused for emphasis. "This is a completely different world from our own." (She looked over the view of forest below the shale cliff.  Occasional drifting smoke and square fields promised nearby habitation.).  (She paused, thinking furiously)

The soldier waited for Merran to speak.

I have to get us both home (but she hadn't a clue what to do)  (Thinking out loud,). She said, "What will (would) you do if I leave you here?"

"I guess I'll have to find someplace to live."

"No, I mean now. Right now. If you were out here alone, what would you do?"

The soldier took a long, slow breath. "I'd look for a road."

(There was no road in sight.  If it existed, it lay between the trees) Merran prompted him. "And then?"

"I'd follow it until I found a house or a town or something."

Or something. "How would you find a road?"

"That sorcerer--Shogan?"

"Shogran," Merran (corrected).

"Shogran." The soldier looked like he had just taken (eaten) a mouthful of dirt. "Shogran must have ridden that horse from a road. And the horse probably knows the way back to its stable. I'd follow it back."

NJC, this is what I'm looking for.  Short descriptions added intermittently.  You normally write in blocks of description, blocks of conversation, and then back again.  I'm looking for a smoother read by mixing it up a bit.  Jamen talks and you could give me a snapshot.  Merran debates Jamen's advice and I want to see the surroundings.  Does this help?

The point isn't about the details.  (Which is why I don't care that it is 'all wrong')  It's about the construction.  Adding detail about mood so that we know that Merran is phlegmatic and practical...that is what I'm looking for.  Adding the surroundings in the midst of her movements and actions.  (like the shale slope to emphasize that they are struggling to stand)

It's a sketch.  Do the plot/milieu questions hit you like a big pizza pie?

I have a draft of the new version of CH3.  I'm hoping to get it out in the next 36 hours.  Amy, you'll beat me up on description.  I think this new version will have a litttle more room to insert it after the thrashing.

I'll get to chapter 3 if work is slow tonight