K.dot wrote:

I confess that I don't always read intros and etcetera.

I actively avoid reading intros. Usually too many spoilers.

It couldn't hurt to put it in.

...in theory, his use of pronouns should be lowercase

A little digging shows that "reverential capitalization" only became common (consistent) in the 1800's long after the KJV was penned. It follows that KJV would have have uses capitals on the pronouns had that been the publishing standard at the time. Therefore you could get away with Apollo going it. Only problem is the wiki says the practice started falling our of favour in the 20th century. Apparently Chicago manual of style recommends against it.

I think it's best if I don't use caps at all. Since Apollo thinks of God as mental illness, it wouldn't make sense for his references to be capitalized. And using both lowercase and caps is too confusing.

Now I just have to find them all. I already capitalized the first seven chapters.

Thanks
Dirk

Okay, here's a pickle. I decided that I want to capitalize all pronouns referring to God in the story, but there's a hitch. Joseph believes the voice in his head is God, so Joseph's use of pronouns should be capitalized. However, Apollo believes the voice in his head is mental illness, so in theory, his use of pronouns should be lowercase. To make matters worse, the narration refers to both voices as God because that's what the voices claim to be, not necessarily because that's what they are. I definitely don't want to give that impression since that question won't be answered until the end of the story (either the end of book one or book two).

I'm not sure I have much choice here. The only consistent thing to do is to use lowercase for all pronouns. The nutty thing is, I plan to capitalize the pronouns in my other book, The Rise of Connor, for the second draft. To make things weirder, Joseph is a Protestant whereas Connor is Catholic, but Protestants are far more likely to expects caps, so if either of my books were going to use caps, it's Galaxy Tales. I had simply intended to use caps for the pronouns in both books until I realized the problem. I suppose I could add a note at the front of Galaxy Tales explaining the reason for not doing so.

Thoughts?
Dirk

1. I just preferred Josephian. I think it rolls better off the tongue.
2. I sometimes put God in quotes to denote that it could be God or mental illness involved in a particular aspect of the story. Believers in Christianity like Joseph naturally believe in God, demons, and angels. The question is whether that's what's really going on with Joseph vs. all of it (including the demon) being caused by mental illness.
4. It's a dangerous future society, so being non-aligned could leave a world open to pressure or outright conquest by the Imperium. The entire society is like our Cold War, with the Realm representing the West, and the Imperium representing the Soviet Union. There is a non-aligned diplomatic moon called Neuer Mond in the story that acts somewhat like the UN. The Imperium happens to find it useful to leave them independent. If the Imperium conquers you, you're aligned with them. If you freely join the Realm, you're aligned with them. Part of whether or not the Imperium can conquer you is determined by your location in space. The Realm would never allow a non-aligned world deep in its territory to be conquered. Most worlds are already aligned since they were colonized by the Imperium or the Realm.
5. The theory behind the Josephian heresy is that God sent an existing soul back (in the body of Joseph) into the galaxy to save it from a man-made Apocalypse until the return of Christ. Peter, Paul, and Moses are the most likely because of the impact they had on Christianity/Judaism. Anyone who helped define either of those religions would be a great candidate for creating a "new" religion. New is in quotes because the heresy is an offshoot of Christianity for the fifth millennium, so it's not like Joseph would be entirely reinventing the wheel with a different God. I decided to keep the idea of a new Bible though since it increases the scale of Joseph's heresy.
6. I've since realized that bringing Catholics and Protestants together as part of Joseph's heresy isn't right for the story. There are about 30B people in the Imperium, the majority of whom believe in the Greek/Roman gods. And there are 20B people in the Realm, most of whom do not believe in Christianity either (mostly secular). New Bethlehem is the only Christian planet in v3 of Galaxy Tales, whose religion had blended both Protestantism and Catholicism. It was mostly Protestant, so I may make it exclusively Protestant in v4 and give passing mention to other major denominations (Catholics, Anglicans, etc.) as living elsewhere. I may or may not have Joseph and Apollo visit a non-aligned New Vatican in act two of the story (TBD). Based on what "God" tells Joseph, he wants the Josephian heresy because it will appeal to everyone. Emperors, kings, and queens will supposedly topple before Joseph/his heresy.

Some of the above was already part of v3, while the rest will be introduced for v4. Things are still evolving, so stuff will no doubt change as I go forward.

I had totally forgotten that this story includes Leonardo, the insane taxi driver, and his long-suffering AI, Stronza. Anyone remember Suicido Mode? :-)

For what it's worth, I just checked the site from my phone (which I also do at times) and it had kicked me out there, too. I then checked the site from my Windows desktop, and I had not been kicked out from there.

Thanks. FYI, this is a very old thread. I went with lowercase but subsequently discovered material on websites written by Catholic clergymen that capitalized the pronouns, so I'll probably switch to caps for the next draft.

From different pages. The first time I was finishing a review (the bottom text field). The others I don't remember exactly which pages. I use two devices to access the site most days (a Chromebook and a Windows PC). Any idea if switching between them might be causing this?

Dirk

Thanks. I've written a version of chapter 2 (now numbered chapters 3 and 4) with [Censored] in lieu of each curse. I like the humor of it. Later in the story, when Apollo's really stressed out, I can do this: [Censored][Censored][Censored][Censored]!

I like biblical plagues too. They would work for Joseph since he's the religious one. He currently curses with made-up stuff like elephant gas and malodorous mutt. He could also say things like: For the love of Moses!

Thanks
Dirk

In what context, njc?

It's new behavior since about the first time I reported it one the previous page.

Interesting article about swearing in Star Trek, of which there was/is a lot (beginning with the original series, BTW), including the f-word in more recent series. Remember this famous line: "Damn it, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a XXX"? And Captain Janeway was quite a potty mouth, using hell and damn all the time, none of which I recall from watching it originally.

https://www.reddit.com/r/DaystromInstit … r_trek_an/

Sol, I'm still getting kicked out regularly by the site. Have you made an intentional change to the timeout period?

I changed it again. The Josephian Heresy. tongue

Interestingly, it took the Catholic Church until the late 1900s to apologize for and clear Da Vinci of heresy. There won't actually be too much detail in the book about what the heresy is, but it won't be an improvement. As noted in a previous post, most of the heretical ideas will result from Joseph unwittingly working with a demon in his head, which he thinks is an important religious figure. I haven't picked one yet, but that figure will replace Jesus in Joseph's head. I'm thinking maybe Moses. I also have to think about what the new heresy will be (in v3 it was the idea that Joseph was the child of Jesus and Mary Magdalene in a former life). There's some funny material in v3 between Joseph and Jesus, so I hope I can save some of it.

The Josephian Heresy is intended to be for the whole galaxy. God tells Joseph that when he's still four years old, which you previously read.

The Christian church remains very much intact. In fact, the major denomination of the church in the galaxy is on New Bethlehem. But "God" told Joseph that the Josephian Heresy is needed since there are 50B people in the galaxy, most of whom are non-Christians. New Bethlehem only has 100M people. And I have yet to decide if I'm going to add a Catholic planet (New Vatican) or just the woke planet (New Canada). For every Realm planet I add, I have to balance it with one Imperial planet for the kids to visit too, so two Realm planets (New Vatican & New Canada) would require two Imperial planets, which is too much additional material. Potentially New Vatican could be a non-aligned planet, so I'd only need one extra Imperial planet.

Or I could make New Bethlehem a unified Christian planet (no more Catholics vs Protestants). Or, maybe they're like Northern Ireland, at each other's throats. That would be another good reason for God to intervene with the Josephian Heresy. One idea for the heresy is that Jesus won't return until Catholics and Protestants reconcile. Perhaps Joseph's life's mission is to bring them together. I like that a lot.

Minor change: I need the word Heresy in the name of Joseph's religion to make it sound a little more crazy, so I'm going with Josephic Heresy instead of Christianity 3.0. The name is chosen by God and He tells Joseph the name's not negotiable. That way, Joseph will be more embarrassed to talk about it, which helps the story. The word heresy is often used with respect to ideas that contradict orthodox beliefs, especially those of Christianity, so there's my tie-in to the latter.

That's the spirit!

Joseph is probably closer to Protestant than Catholic. His planet reveres the ancient King James Bible. But they have church leaders named elders (e.g., Elder Amos). And Joseph's ideas for his new religion could be the result of smoking some tainted weed. :-)

Also, there may be a planet named New Vatican, perhaps with a female pope. Not sure yet. But New Bethlehem definitely isn't Catholic. I had considered making New Bethlehem an offshoot of Anglicanism since New Bethlehem is a constitutional monarchy. However, some of the planet's beliefs are based on Republican party views run amok. It's an intentional mish mash, so I'm not picking solely on any one country/religion. Whatever it is, it's a very right-wing world, both religiously and politically. I'm still trying to figure out how it came to be a monarchy, though.

By the way, I have a potential name for that left-wing woke planet: New Canada. Bunch of godless heathens. :-)

I've pretty much settled on calling Joseph's new religion Christianity 3.0. And a demon will masquerade as the "religious" figure with whom he works out his initial, crazy ideas. Maybe Moses? I'm open to suggestions.

Perhaps God expects Joseph to recognize that he'd been brainstorming with the demon, which led to all of Joseph's nutty ideas. I could then keep most of those brainstorming sessions as long as I reveal soon after that he'd been tricked by the demon. But, the entity that Joseph believes to be the real God has been with Joseph since age 4 (that entity is not the demon). Having the Christian God come to Joseph and tell him he's going to create a new religion called the Heresy is hard to swallow. It might make more sense for "God" (who may be real or mental illness) to call it Christianity 3.0 or something less goofy than the Heresy (3.0 because there was the OT period, the NT period, and then the third, latest period). Christianity 3.0 could ultimately be an extension of concepts from Christianity, updated for the fifth millennia and, supposedly, set into motion by God because he wants to save humans from an impending, man-made apocalypse. Further to that, I had previously considered changing the Heretic's Bible to simply be an addition to the Old and New Testaments. So, Joseph wouldn't be writing a new Bible, just a third part to the real Bible. That, at least, could keep open the story question as to whether Joseph is really hearing God, which needs to remain a "real" possibility until the end of the story, which could be up to three books. Naturally, Christianity 3.0 is still a stretch, but not as outrageous, IMO. I do need to include the New Commandments, though, with the first being 'Thou shalt not kill' (not 'Thou shalt not murder', which is the common translation of that commandment). That new first commandment is important at the end of book one.

Hmm. Just reread some of the later chapters of Galaxy Tales v3 as I'm going through doing some of the cleanup for v4. Revamping this story is going to be harder to do than I imagined. It's tied very closely to Christianity, with all kinds of Christian ideas/biblical references that Joseph tries to reconcile with evolution, the Big Bang, reincarnation, other species of hominids having souls, etc. Although God doesn't come out and give Joseph the crazy answers he comes up with, God is present in the conversations, acting as a sounding board for Joseph at times. One thing is clear: for the story to work, Joseph's religion, the Heresy, has to build on Christianity (e.g., there's a Heretic's Bible in the story with New Commandments, among other things). I think I need to add another voice/presence to Joseph's mind who can step in for God for those nutty conversations. I had a demon named Billie show up in Joseph's head at the end of act one, which Joseph thought he had gotten rid of. Perhaps she reappears in the third act pretending to be an important religious figure from history for Joseph to have his discussions with. It begs the question, though, why God wouldn't reveal that Billie is a demon.

I have energy rifles called crispers, energy sidearms called toasters, and molten grenades. Needless to say, the molten grenades don't have a stun setting. tongue
I also have car-mounted lasers called mininovas.

Someone else suggested using drones inside the ships to attack the enemy. But I'm sure in the future there would also be countermeasures by those invading. Ultimately, I decided the chapter was too long already, so I lean toward leaving out any additional cool tech and countertech. The end result of the battle would, of course, be the same since that's where the story needs to go.

However, your observation is generally spot on, at least when looking at how Ukraine is fighting with Western weapons, including very effective use of drones. The future is in robots that would lead the charge, followed by humans to come in and mop up.

By the way, I updated the opening epigraph of chapter one of v4 (the memo to the Realm Governing Council). Not a huge change, but I think it gives a better sense of how the Realm views the sacrifice of St. James and her crew without actually giving away up front that the whole crew lost their lives during the mission.

Also, there's a Galactipedia article in chapter 5. I'm not sure if I ever sent it to you. It's only two pages, but it's the turning point in the late 21st century that led to the society as depicted 2000 years later.

Sol, the timeout bug is definitely back. I'm getting kicked out every few hours.

22

(2 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

You have to be inside the Edit wizard. Go to Home, click on your picture, click on the Portfolio tab, click on the book you want to enter, click the mother of all Edit buttons, click on the Contests tab, click enter contest.

Is anyone else noticing a recurrence of frequent timeouts? I've been kicked out of the system four times in less than 24 hours.

Thanks
Dirk

It's what happens if you hold in a sneeze. :-)

I got rid of St. James's two instances of cursing, and I changed Ecks from being almost decapitated to:

Moments later, an enemy blast hit Ecks in the neck — a deep, fatal wound. He died even before his body hit the deck, his still-open eyes reflecting the valor of his last moment.

The colonel's arm being blown off I decided to keep.

Interesting. There is a medical condition that causes eyes to pop from their sockets. This, and other trivia, brought to you by Google search. :-)