2,976

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Kdot wrote:

She also does things that will horrify Joseph.

Such as shooting helpless opponents?

No, she's more of a physical fighter. She beats their brains in. She's present at the fight between Joseph and Apollo at the Neuer Mond dinner. Apollo, of course, has his enhanced abilities from God. Joseph will have Billie. I still need to make Joseph lose, though, so Joseph has to find a way to reign her in.

2,977

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

bill kandiliotis wrote:

I can only suggest two things about Billie/Anikh. 1) she has to play a part in moving the narrative forward, why did God put her there? How will her being there, causing mischief, determine the outcome of Joe's journey. 2)if she is an evil entity, her backstory should be consistent, was she a bad person? A killer. Another nagging issue, since we are delving into the supernatural, what are the laws of the universe that govern these players? As a scifi reader I am anticipating a grand ultra universe with forces at work trying to influence the outcome of our universe. This has good potential.

There will be some brief hints before she dies that all is not as it seems. Maybe she rolls her eyeballs up into her head, claiming it's a nervous tic. TBD. At first, Joseph will welcome her to his head. Who would do otherwise for a sweet little girl? Later, once her sinister nature becomes evident, there will be a discussion with God about why she's there. Apparently, it's to help Joseph found his religion, although God won't explain why. She does sh*t that Joseph wants but would rarely dare do himself. She also does things that will horrify Joseph.

2,978

(60 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

In what demonic paint store did they make you work in? Green and blue make white?

2,979

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

They all want increased time with the body. Joseph kept them mostly in check during v2. I was saving the subplot of Andrew taking over for book two. But, hey, why wait? I'm going to make Billie so nasty even Andrew is afraid of her!

2,980

(1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

We all gotta die sometime. I believe in doing it spectacularly! Just ask Trump.

2,981

(60 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

I don't know, Seabrass, she doesn't look green to me. Maybe after a little more absinthe...

2,982

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

It seems little Anikh will be returning in v3, having been totally dumped mid-story in v2. She's the girl Joseph rescued from the hospital who died in his arms and took up residence in his head. I didn't have a good use for her. Until Bill K. returned to TNBW! His review gave me the idea to resurrect her. Picture Regan from the Exorcist (her head all a twirling) in Joseph's head. Her new name in v3 will be Billie, naturally. Among other things, she's going to be the ghost who takes on the pedophile guard in King of the Slaves. No need for Joseph to do it when I can let her at him! I have got to rewatch the Exorcist! She can also take over in a TBD prison scene where Joseph is almost raped. She'll be off pouting when Joseph really needs her to kick the shogun's ass.

2,983

(60 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Janet Taylor-Perry wrote:

She stared into nothingness, mind numbed by the effects of absinthe, but it was better than the alternative.

Bathe a Wookie?

2,984

(1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Manticore-skinned Veethan? As Thurston Howell once said, "Watch your language! There are ladies present." And Amy's here, too. :-)

2,985

(60 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Leia thought, Han is dead and the Wookie here desperately needs a bath!

2,986

(186 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Dill Carver wrote:
Norm d'Plume wrote:

Why not just put armed snipers all along the border? It worked relatively well for the East Germans... Jobs lost to illegal immigrants? 0. Cost of capturing, arresting, housing, feeding, trying and deporting illegal immigrants? $0. Number of illegals who die trying to walk across the open desert? 0. It's pretty much win-win.

Armed Snipers?

Is there any other kind?

Whilst unarmed Snipers might be easier to train and cheaper to equip, you might also find them to be a tad less effective within their primary role.

Har! The East Germans were desperately trying to stop their own people leaving. An exodus to the West. I think that rather than a perimeter of snipers, they had an extensive physical barrier; a wall (and fence in places) that was manned by the military and the police. Sentries (armed ones), attack-dogs, minefields and barbed-wire.

I'm not saying that a wall of containment around the USA is a bad idea BTW. It's just that mass emigration is not perceived to be the issue. No interception by arresting or detaining for border infringement or transgression? No capture at all, simply gun everyone down from a distance and hopefully with a headshot? You say that this would reduce 'the number of "illegals" who die trying to walk across the open desert to zero (is this were the unarmed snipers make their killin'?). How many snipers to cover the whole border 24/7?  It worked relatively well for the East Germans? Yeah, so well that their state, their country; the GDR, ceased to exist.  LMAO

I'm glad you're laughing. For a minute I thought you took my post seriously. If it moves, shoot it! I should make that my signature.

2,987

(186 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Why not just put armed snipers all along the border? It worked relatively well for the East Germans... Jobs lost to illegal immigrants? 0. Cost of capturing, arresting, housing, feeding, trying and deporting illegal immigrants? $0. Number of illegals who die trying to walk across the open desert? 0. It's pretty much win-win.

2,988

(186 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Have you ever sneaked a Snickers as a snack while snucking a pair sneakers?

What do I win?

2,989

(1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Found it on Google. That's the whole poem.

2,990

(1,634 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Indoor outhouse. (My grandmother had one.)

2,991

(186 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Dill Carver wrote:

within the context of you own vocabulary.

Did you mean your or you're? ;-)

2,992

(213 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

0C in western Canada today. That's 32F for you hillbillies. Loving it. I'll send out my own F**K post as soon as the first three feet of snow hits and the temperature drops to -40. Just think, that's 72F below the freezing point of water! In Nunavut, that's considered balmy. Unfortunately, I gave away my monstrous parka about ten years ago. I kept my "Canada" boots but find them rather slippery on ice, so I bought a pair of serious "man" boots and they slip as well. They're real purdy to look at, though, whenever I open the closet.

I moved to Ottawa briefly many years ago. Had a condo with outdoor parking. Went home for Christmas for just one week. In the meantime it snowed/rained/snowed/rained/etc. By the time I got back, my windshield wipers were buried in 2 inches of solid ice. I spent three hours with the car running on high heat, continuous rear defrost, and an ice scraper used more like a hammer to free the car. I'm not sure why I didn't try a real hammer.

Ah, the memories.

EDIT: K, should western in western Canada be capitalized?

Thanks, Charles. Others have told me the same thing, so you're in good company.

2,994

(213 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

I've been talking you folks up to Bill Kandiliotis who recently returned to TNBW. Some of you may remember him. Sci-fi writer. And then I read through the previous page of posts.

Run, Bill, run like the wind!

Also, check out the Queries, Blurbs, and Synopsis group. I recall it had a few good posts.

2,996

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Much as I would love to disagree with a unanimous opinion (I like italics), there are too many new words, and I can't italicize them all. And it's just weird to italicize words in dialogue just because they're new.

Thanks

Opinions, please. I'm wondering when to italicize new words. Following are four examples.

1) Tactical overlays showed their light nova cannons, heavy supernova cannons, and shields readying for battle.
2) “Warning, intruder alert!” Aussie said. “Imperial Classiarii are now boarding this vessel!”
3) "Gobs! The whole galaxy?" Joseph asked, his eyes round as saucers.
4) Apollo was sole Heir to the Imperium Romanum.

Number one seems correct.
In number two, the new word is Classiarii (it's a real word from the Roman Empire). Are new words in dialogue italicized? It could make it seem as if the speaker is stressing the word, rather than the narrator.
In number three, the new word is gobs (like gobsmacked). Same as number two?
In number four, Heir to the Imperium Romanum is a formal title. Should it be italicized on first use?

I'm also not sure what to do with all the other made up words in the book. Do I italicize all of them on first use?

Thanks
Dirk

2,998

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Yes

2,999

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Opinions, please. I'm wondering when to italicize new words. Following are four examples.

1) Tactical overlays showed their light nova cannons, heavy supernova cannons, and shields readying for battle.
2) “Warning, intruder alert!” Aussie said. “Imperial Classiarii are now boarding this vessel!”
3) "Gobs! The whole galaxy?" Joseph asked, his eyes round as saucers.
4) Apollo was sole Heir to the Imperium Romanum.

Number one seems correct.
In number two, the new word is Classiarii. I think this one should be italicized.
In number three, the new word is gobs. Not sure what to do with this one.
In number four, Heir to the Imperium Romanum is a formal title. Should it be italicized on first use?

I'm also not sure what to do with all the other made up words in the book. Do I italicize all of them on first use?

Thanks
Dirk

I've been told that agents usually want to know the ending. Also, for your blurb, why is the labyrinth important? Also what is the zealot's agenda? You haven't said anything that would draw me into your book.