Search options (Page 15 of 58)

I'm pretty sure that in this statement,
" I set it up in the narrative and then let the profanity and the weirdness distinguish his dialogue. Without using ums and uhs or stuttering or whatever."
John said nothing about not tarnishing dialogue with swearing -- not his point. Thus it is very difficult to use John's use of swearing to prove one's point based upon a point he never made. Or are we now allowed to discuss politics in the forums again? Oh well, it was worth a shot. Take care. Vern

My mantra for speaker tags (feel free to borrow it): "Let the words (dialogue) and actions show the tone and/or state of mind of the speaker." Yes, there may be a few exceptions as with every rule, but there should not be many imnho. Take care. Vern

You could rearrange it to eliminate any doubt: "Caligula's peers called him Bastardus Minusculus in his youth. However, once his brilliance was recognized, the epithet became associated with a great honor similar to the Nobel Prize during the late second and third millennia." or such.
Take care. Vern

A good book and a good story are whatever the audience deems it to be. Period. Granted, in most cases, your audience is not going to be ecstatic about a book which is sloppily written, full of errors, undeveloped characters, ridiculous dialogue, torturous descriptions, no plot, no tension, slow as molasses, etc., but a few minor deviations from the "publishers norm" are most likely not going to be a stake in the heart. The only "concrete rule" is the one which states "There are no concrete rules." That's the way I see it. Take care. Vern

You always have been allowed to edit up to the contest deadline. I doubt that has changed. It would be kind of useless to have reviews if you couldn't. Take care. Vern

Personally, "She is a donkey" without any context says a lot more and more subtly than spelling out what has not been mentioned with four times as many words which in no way covers all the characteristics which might be attributed to the simple four word phrase. Take care. Vern

Here's a start, but a google search will give you about 10,800,000 more sources. Take care. Vern

Metaphor vs simile
Metaphor vs Simile. Metaphor and simile are often confused due to their similarities. But in fact, the two imply different aspects of language. Just to start with, we can say that a simile is a metaphor, but all metaphors are not similes.
Difference Between Metaphor and Simile
www.differencebetween.net/language/difference-between-metaphor-and-simile/

Is this answer helpful?
What is the Difference Between Metaphor and Simile?
https://www.dailywritingtips.com/what-i … between...

The terms metaphor and simile are slung around as if they meant exactly the same thing. A simile is a metaphor, but not all metaphors are similes.
Simile and Metaphor—What’s the Difference? | Grammarly
https://www.grammarly.com/blog/whats-th … tween-a...

Simile vs. Metaphor Quiz. Both similes and metaphors add color and depth to language. Share your favorite similes and metaphors in the comments! Grammarly is a must-have
I

Well, you tried, bless your heart. Take care. Vern

Oxford comma, Harvard comma, and/or Podunk U comma, is all in the eye of the beholder. Good grief, Charley Brown, use it or don't use it; if there is no right or wrong, let your publisher figure it out if it will use more ink than necessary, and if you self-publish, you can make your own decision. Five cents,,, please. Take care. Vern

I would think using transitional phrase would be akin to using the oft maligned "was". It's not the use, rather the overuse which becomes the problem. Let's face it, we live and talk in a world where the transitional phrase evolved as part of our language. It serves a purpose like everything else, but, of course can also become a crutch like "was" when taken for granted. If the transitional phrase is limited, it will become as invisible as "said" being used as a speaker tag.

There are lots of ways to mix things up to avoid the transitional phrase to limit its use much as rewording sentences to restrict the use of "was" to those times where nothing will do the job as well. As mentioned, dialogue can be a great way to rearrange things, but that too can be rearranged to showcase things differently. For example, Deck's version could perhaps  be changed slightly to more align with your vision:

***

"... solely in the hands of___" The shock wave rocked Joseph on his feet. "What the hell was that," he yelled as prisoners fled from their cells.
He thought he heard "Explosion!" through the wailing siren and ringing in his ears.

***
Or such.

No one way to make everyone happy, just try various alternatives until You are satisfied with the words read aloud. As with anything, a pinch of salt is generally better than a shaker full. And a little pepper may be even better. Just my opinion. Take care. Vern

Oh, jeez, that someone thinks a short story would make a good novel is not an insult unless you are just looking for insults -- no this shouldn't be taken as one either. Every story starts with an idea whether a short story or novel or novella, or just an anecdote and any good idea has the potential to become a short story or a novel depending upon how one wishes to expand upon it. No one forces anyone to turn a good short story into a novel any more than one is forced to turn a good idea into a short story. Writer's choice. But certainly an author would grant a reader to the freedom to compliment the good idea and it's rendition within a short story having the real possibility of a good novel also. Just a differing opinion on the subject. Take care. Vern

You might want to check this post for a possible answer -- or not:
https://www.thenextbigwriter.com/forums … tml#p34441
The Devil made me do it. Take care. Vern