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Congratulations!

Friends - I'm so sorry for being so rude and not replying to these thoughtful comments for MORE THAN A MONTH! I've been really busy lately only checking TNBW from my phone so I haven't had a chance until this week to properly check.
There is so much good advice here - I'm so grateful - and you've given me more and more ideas about how to address the opening. Actually, I think I'm going to try all of them!
It's really interesting that you're all summing up my exact issues from both sides. I started the novel slowly intentionally to immerse the reader (which is what Sheriff thinks is correct), but after writing it I started reading some YA (Hunger Games, Twilight, John Greene's stuff) and found that my writing seems old fashioned compared to the pacing used in these novels, which is exactly Gacela's point. So, like CJ says, I need to land somewhere in the middle.

I've only three chapters left and then it's finished :-(
Good thing there's a whole other Rhiannon WIP I haven't even started!

As a community, we should welcome new starters and give them confidence rather than criticise them publicly. Reviewing isn’t easy for beginners who have never done it before so we should offer our support, especially if we want people to stick around. Personally, I know my first reviews were worthless, but because of the kindness of some patient members, I have learned a lot about reviewing as well as writing and (I hope) my reviews aren't worthless anymore. Perhaps we could have a template of sample questions for new reviewers to help them become comfortable with reviewing.
Simple things like;
What did you like about the chapter?
What could be improved?
Etc.

Congratulations, that's fantastic news! I remember reading the first chapters and still remember how interesting they were!

I just added a paragraph to a published chapter and made some edits. When I went to Save & View Chapter Content, the page asked me for my login & password. After entering these details it brought me back to the chapter I was editing but my edits were gone.
Has this ever happened to anyone? Does anyone know if it's possible to recover the missing edits?

What about turning that around, and make all work belonging to the winner worth double points for a month after the competition? That means you'd get a big increase in reviews for whatever you've published already.

What kind of people are requesting to join the group? Newcomers or people who have been on the site for a while? I agree it's better not to increase the members of the group because it could take forever to get through a reviewing round, so they'd have to be really excellent reviewers with a new slant on things to add them

Chapter, Jube? It could almost be a book!
I know where Randy is coming from. I find it disheartening if I spend time on a review and the writer dismisses everything I've said. I've stopped reviewing some people for that reason.
I think it's a balance between appreciation and critical thinking!

After reading chapter 5, I come away with the same niggling concern that I had the previous time. If I had a kid who had a convicted murderer after her, I'd be dashing home to be with her, or at least using the diner phone to check in, and I'd be very uneasy until I knew she was safe.
I saw your comment that you don't want the chapter to be about Chief & his paranoia, but I think a sentence to summarise that he had called home from the diner & everything was okay, would resolve these concerns.

That's exactly how I do it too! I usually just get a small idea, and whenever I'm not doing anything that requires brain power (commuting, yoga, showering, etc.), my mind inevitably starts planning what's happening next.

I'm still having problems with Sarah's story because, even though it's written out in the first draft, I don't like where the story went and am having trouble making the chapters any good, but no better ideas have come to me yet so I haven't changed direction.

Other authors have very complicated plot plans. I saw JK Rowlings somewhere online, and it's really complex in how she plotted all of the main scenes and subplots, which clearly worked really well for her, but everyone's different.

I was reading about Judy Blume recently and she said she can write up to 20 drafts of the same chapter. Her writing is so on point, that all of her editing and more editing must really pay off!  So, that's what I'm trying to do (but maybe 2 or 3, not 20!)

Congratulations! What an awesome way to start the new year!!