One guy a few years ago popped onto one of my poems here and offered nothing at all except the remark that my poem was pretentious: "Affected. Showy. Attempting to imply greater importance or talent than is possessed." Apparently.
I wish I had the poem because I think now I'd look at it and maybe see what he meant. At the time I was confused because "pretentious" is such a judgment word -- as in, pretentious where? What do you mean? It sounded like something you say to someone who not only knows what they're doing, but thinks they're the best. I didn't know what I was doing? I was out there learning, and one must blot the page before she learns how to paint. I think the poem he called pretentious was my tenth attempt at a poem ever. My prior attempts were even worse: not poetry at all! Just emotional outpourings. I felt this one was at least nudging toward a more universal theme. It probably was pretentious? That's a beginning! I'd rather have a pretentious poem than a blank page. But pretentious in what sense, sir? He didn't pull out a single line from the poem to illustrate his point or describe the effect on the reader. He just passed judgment and moved on, as if we both agreed that the posting was my final product and that I was merely collecting votes.
I could take a blunt critique. A couple months before, my creative writing prof had asked me to attend a writing seminar and share a poem I'd recently written. I don't know how I got on that list, not being a poet at all, but she had liked something I'd submitted, and was confident it would be well-received at the seminar. The seminar involved a few of my fellow students posting their undergrad work on an overhead screen for all to read, and having a guest speaker {professional poet} assess the work for those present as a means to learn. My writing professor felt certain he'd like my effort. He did not!
When my poem came up on the overhead, I was called to the front and stood by the overhead screen a little nervous but fairly confident. As he read the opening lines, he writhed and scowled and wriggled in his seat and burst out with, "Ah, uh, no! NO, NO, NO." {I assume he was not privy to reading my poor, raggedy attempt before this moment.} Then he publicly decimated my work, line by line, punctuating every remark with NO, UH, NO, NO, NO as he told me over the course of several minutes why this horrific poem was in fact the worst attempt at poetry he had ever read.
Everyone else was embarrassed for me, but I believe I stood beside the overhead screen the whole time with my eyes on him, grinning ear to ear. I signed up for his class the following semester, and exhausted myself writing MANY POEMS based on his daily prompts.
The poem I posted here at TNBW that day was for his class. It was written in about an hour because we were writing two or three poems a night. Was it pretentious? Well, not purposefully, but it was certainly fumbling and out of my element. {I am not a poet. I like writing stories. The poems I write are exercises intended to help strengthen my narrative writing, and like I said, I think that poem was my tenth attempt.} So the reviewer's assessment probably wasn't off. But he didn't CRITIQUE my work; he judged it. Big difference.
Any Jim off the street can reduce ten hours {days, months, years} of a writer's hard work to the comparatively pint-sized remark "this is pretentious." It takes an experienced reader to explain why it reads that way. And honestly, if a person reviews you without offering analysis, unless they make some pretty good sense, it's probably best to toss the remarks. They may have no idea what they're talking about. Don't toss a great negative analysis. Those are absolutely priceless. But toss the ones that come without any back-up, because those are likely just opinions. If they can't even say why they think what they think, what possible relevance can their opinion have?
I don't like scrambled eggs. That's an opinion. I don't like the way you make scrambled eggs. That's an opinion. I like the way you make scrambled eggs, and also I like scrambled eggs. OPINIONS. I don't like the way you make scrambled eggs, because you put too much salt in them, and this overwhelms the flavor of the egg. If you would only add a sprinkle of salt, you'd find that the flavor of the egg is enhanced rather than smothered. This would improve the flavor of the egg immensely. Analysis.
"This poem is pretentious." Opinion. "This poem makes no sense to me, therefore I can only assume it is pretentious." Opinion. {Stupid one.} "This poem is written so distantly I feel alienated from it as a reader. For example, the line ______ accomplishes nothing. It's as if you're trying to list lofty ideas but you lack the talent / experience to tie them together into a unifying point. That's probably why it feels pretentious to me. It's as if you're not thinking of the reader at all. You're just trying to say things poets say, and you don't really know why you're saying them. Poetry isn't lofty ideas listed in a pretty way. Poetry says something impactful. You haven't said anything here. Figure out what you want to say." Analysis. Tough analysis, but valuable analysis.
"This poem is pretentious, and I'm going to tell you why. You are writing down to your readers. Take the following line, for example. It is _____. This leaves your reader feeling alienated and removed from the poem's point. If you rewrite it as follows, you will see that the exact same message comes across, but now you are not pushing the reader away. You are inviting him or her in." To which I might have replied, "That is helpful! However, my purpose was to distance the reader. Not to be pretentious, but because the theme is _____ and I thought that theme might be amplified by the actual distancing experience created by the way I constructed that line. I was experimenting. I believe this is only my tenth poem in my entire life." To which he might have replied, "I see! So I reacted emotionally to your poem and was disgusted, and that feeling is what you wanted, but I didn't take it far enough to reflect. I wonder if adding a line here might push the reader closer to where you want him or her to go." To which I might reply, "I like that suggestion! Thank you. I couldn't see it until you pointed it out, but I can see now I hadn't taken it far enough."
Conversation!! <3 Two people learn a little together as writers, and the work is valuably assessed and improved, not because the writer auto-edited based on a nameless reviewers' opinions, but because the writer was pushed out of her perspective a little, and so was the reviewer, as they each tried to pinpoint what the work was trying to say, and why it missed.
Marilyn, it sounds like the people you're talking about above are out offering opinions laced with arrogance, rather than analysis. That's a real shame. Reviewing is valuable exercise that potentially benefits both the writer and the reviewer. I would hope new writers here see this thread and learn to sift the useless remarks from the helpful criticism. Arrogance has no place in creative work, and unfortunately on a site like this, arrogance can be found amongst both the writers and the reviewers. When you find a strong writer able to listen, and a strong reviewer able to analyze, that's the magic. It's of enormous importance that new writers learn to sift the opinions from useful analysis.
, some not as well as my own and let them slide. It's so interesting, the process of painting what's in your mind in such a way that another person can receive a reasonable facsimile. I find that, when someone repeats my words back to me in their voice, it's kinda like Active Listening. I learn a lot from hearing how my words come across. I often make adjustments and my work improves as a result.
