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I have 650 lines in my names bible for my old book (90 rows just for the characters), and that was easy compared to what I'm going for this time around. Fortunately, a much smaller cast of characters, but Connor is going on a Middle East tour of many of the exact places visited by Jesus, as documented in the Bible. Few of them exist as they did in His time. In some cases, the original location is buried under new villages or monuments built over top. Even the Church of the Nativity is probably in the wrong location. There are a number of sites on the Web that say the translation from the original Gospels for Jesus's birthplace should have been interpreted as a spare or lower room in a private home, which is where people often stayed when the inn was full. It was customary in Palestine in that era. Bethlehem was Joseph's ancestral home, and it's highly unlikely he couldn't find a relative or friend with a place for Mary to give birth. It's too bad I never did database programming. A database would be ideal for this much data.

Thanks, JP. It fits with other have said as well.

Church of Britannia might be better than Church of England, especially if I introduce a Third Testament (written a few hundred years into the future) addressing why Jesus didn't return after the Great Collapse of Civilization, which had to be the Great Tribulation of Revelation. Surprisingly, the Antichrist was a woman, namely Dr. Ess. Also, I need some way to justify why Jesus didn't return before humans left earth and colonized the stars. The new prophecies will mysteriously foreshadow the events of the book.

I still need to consider how much of Charles's suggestions I can use. It breaks things I had planned for future books, but we'll see.

Thanks, Charles. It's an interesting premise, and I've already set up the idea of time travel with Professor Hinkley's coconut-powered time machine. However, I have a different ending in mind when it's time for the boys to meet God. I could toss it, but I'll need to think about the pros and cons of your suggestion before I make a decision. Fortunately, I have years to make up my mind.

Thanks for your input.
Dirk

A religion descended from Christianity sounds very good, although I'll need to define a number of new beliefs before Joseph turns them inside out. I think Dr. Ess should feature prominently. How do you feel about being the 'Antichrist That Wast', Amy? There could also be prophecies about a teen prophet born in the 41st century and the destruction of New Bethlehem. I could include Bible excerpts similar to the Galactipedia articles.

I don't think I'll use the Mormons, though. Not prominent enough. And Protestants are too diverse (although that would make it easy to create a denomination that veers off course over two thousand years). Since Joseph is (currently) crown prince of his home world and is descended from Queen Elizabeth, I think I prefer the Church of England. I just need to be careful not to piss off the British by modifying their religion before Joseph turns it upside down.

The best time to rewrite this would definitely be after the Unholy Trinity series, since I'll have a lot more knowledge about Christianity and the Bible by the time I'm done. I'm also sick of Into the Mind of God, so it's definitely time for a break. I'll also need time to eventually research the Church of England.

Really cool solution. Thank you, both.

Thanks, Amy. Although I didn't consider the Roman pantheon, I did think of taking out Christianity, either by ripping out all religion, or by creating a new religion in the heads of both boys. The Roman gods is an interesting idea, although neither boy currently believes in those gods. The Imperium celebrates the Roman gods as part of their culture, but doesn't necessarily believe in them. I could change that to a resurrected belief system.

I wouldn't want to replace all of Joseph's ghosts with Roman gods, however. Joseph's belief that the ghosts are real people in his life are what help convince him that they are the real spirits of dead family and friends. Part of the problem with the belief in, say, Zeus as the god in their heads is that the reader won't believe they're real, so they must be mentally ill. At least with Christianity (my likely target audience), there is a degree of belief that the voices, especially God's, could be real.

There is quite a bit of crossover in v3 between Joseph and Apollo. They regularly exchange testy messages in act I (in the epigraphs) about current events, and are at each other's throats in act II. I'll have to think if there is still more I can do to pitch them against each other. Act III necessarily separates them, with Joseph in prison and Apollo fighting his military.

If Apollo heard more voices (including his dead beast friend, Germanus, and his assassinated father, Nero), that would make the two boys's experiences very similar. Nero will definitely wind up in Apollo's head in any rewrite. I had intended to make Nero's ghost part of v3 before deciding to shelve the book.

Joseph hearing the devil would either cause him to resist it at all turns (as Apollo does with God), or require Joseph to turn evil as part of his character arc, which was a change planned for book two of the series, when Billie (Joseph's evil demon) regularly learns how to take over his body. This makes it somewhat similar to later Dune books, where Paul Atreides's sister Alia is overwhelmed by the ghosts in her head and makes a deal with her evil dead grandfather to silence the voices at the expense of eventually losing control to him.

I'll spend some time thinking about all of these options. Completely ripping out Christianity would almost certainly break much of the story, however. Since that is my primary target market, I'll probably keep it in, but eliminate or at least tone down the chapters that would be most objectionable to my planned audience.

Great food for thought. Thank you.

I reread the ending to Into the Mind of God. It's some of my best writing, along with the revised introduction to the boys in chapter one, and the new chapter where Joseph confides in Elder Amos about the voices in his head. All of that is recent material. I'm trying to figure out if there is a way to salvage this book someday.

Act III, with Joseph in prison and Apollo trying to reign in his military, is mostly salvageable, IMO. Act II still needs strengthening, but it contains some good chapters (Apollo taking out a hit on Nero, Joseph getting drunk, the Maya, etc.). Act I is way too long, but nothing a good hacksaw can't fix. The parade for example, adds nothing but carnage to the story.

Based on feedback I've received over the years, non-Christians don't want to read it because they think it's Christian, and serious Christians will hate it because it's too irreverent, in spite of the changes I made in Act I. It's also violent since that drives the quest, although so is Star Wars. Since my other books will target Christians, I'm more inclined to target them for this book/series than I am non-Christians. That allows me to market to one audience without having two totally separate identities across all forms of online marketing. I figure non-Christians will find it if it does well enough.

A key question throughout is whether the boys are really hearing God or are mentally ill. It drives the story, along with the attempts of Apollo and Joseph to head off a man-made Apocalypse. Joseph is convinced that he's hearing God, but eventually comes to the conclusion that he probably isn't. Apollo is convinced he's going nuts, but eventually concludes the opposite. Those are their character arcs and I plan to keep them.

Joseph meeting Jesus in Act III and learning that Jesus was his biological father is a big no-no, unless the Christian reader is convinced by then that Joseph really is mentally ill. Ditto for the chapter in Act II where he rewrites the Ten Commandments. I need to either completely lose those chapters, or find a way to make them acceptable.

Also, Apollo's God is too snarky to be acceptable to Christians. I did that because Apollo doesn't have a wiseass in his head the way Joseph has Andrew. Apollo's God does double duty as a jokester to keep it light. Humor is a must for this story. Without it, I'd have to pitch much of my best material, which ain't happening.

I could put Apollo's friend in his head (I forget his name, but he was killed by Nero at the Colosseum) to keep Apollo's story light, allowing his God to become more serious, like Joseph's.

Thoughts?

Are you sitting down? My latest chapter of Into the Mind of God, called Imperial Revolt, is finally up. It's an updated version of the same chapter from v2. It includes edits from reviewers and some minor cleanup.

This doesn't seem all that different from "he sighed with exasperation," and I know I've seen phrases like that quite a bit. Can you tell from just a sigh that someone is exasperated? I don't really want to stop in the middle of a heated argument for showing. (To qualify, it's the third person POV of the other character in the conversation.)

Bzzt. Chapter 30's been up for weeks.