In defense of the adverb--what the durn'd things ARE good for. From The Passive Guy.
1,676 2016-06-03 18:11:23
Re: Places to Find Reference Reading II (19 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
1,677 2016-06-03 13:00:59
Re: The Sorcerer's Progress (1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
So those hundreds of notes are collected (mostly; new ones arrive daily) but not yet organized. Notes I have, up the wazoo. In fact, I'm gonna need a new wazoo soon.
But I may be near the point of progress on Maurand, Day Two.
1,678 2016-06-03 06:04:23
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
There should be a payoff in Yunker putting all he knows into use at once, for good or ill.
You do know that you'll need to plan a boxed set, right?
1,679 2016-06-03 04:07:04
Re: The Colorless Dragon Thread (354 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
You shouldn't be a techie. You should be a manager. Managers get up early so they can boss us around. Techies stay late trying to figure out how to do what the bosses want--and they prefer to work after the bosses go home because the bosses like nothing more than to keep the techies tied up in meetings stroking their nefarious egos.
/2.718... . (That denominator is the limit [as n goes to zero] of the nth root of ( 1 + n ). A most wonderful number.)
1,680 2016-06-02 02:17:37
Re: The Colorless Dragon Thread (354 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
It gets better after a few days####weeks#####months######years.
1,681 2016-06-02 02:15:50
Re: Strongest Start-Review Replies (11 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I hope things get better, Dags ... and please don't treat his as pressure--unless that helps!
1,682 2016-06-01 05:41:23
Re: The Sorcerer's Progress (1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Meanwhile, what have I been doing? I'm supposed to be working on Day 2 of Merran's time with Maurand's family. Instead I've been (starting on) getting my hundreds of small thematic and plot device/structure notes in order. I'm also thinking about what has to happen shortly after Merran and Jamen leave with Pausonallie.
This matters because there's a lot to write downstream, and I may have hundreds of thousands of words that will depend in some measure on details I set up now. I can't get everything laid out or I won't be able to get anything written, but I need to be sure I don't close things that should be open, or open too wide things that should be closed. I also need some sense of what's going to happen in the next three to four books.
So, among other things, I'm trying to lay out what one or two non-Kirsey back entrances to the Academy look and feel like.
1,683 2016-05-30 16:22:43
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Oh, maybe you can have Petra tell Jaylene what Jaylene needs to know about emptying the souls that give strength to the Horror, either the direct fact or something Jaylene can figure it out from. That would mean beginning the next chapter within the Lance.
1,684 2016-05-30 10:24:26
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Then plan a great ending later for her, pehaps via her Lance-held soul. Let her help with a key step in this book or the final one. Maybe even let us see Behira claim her. She can be the cavalry over the metaphorical hill.
1,685 2016-05-30 03:48:02
Re: The Sorcerer's Progress (1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
How about something that disturbs the physics that your ships depend on for propulsion or communication? Maybe disturb their internal artificial gravity? Trigger infrasonics or infrasonic-modulated internal light displays inside a ship before boarding so the defenders are all busy tossing their cookies?
1,686 2016-05-29 10:35:51
Re: The Sorcerer's Progress (1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
FYI, for some part of today and maybe tomorrow, Mad Genius Club's Kindle editions are up for free or at dollar or two-dollar discounts. Several of them are start-of-series teasers.
I just read Kate Paulk's ConVent and some of the combat scenes might be useful studies for this group--very different in pacing and event structure than anything we do. (Okay, I can't speak for NormD.) Unfortunately, that's a dollar book ... limited time only.
1,687 2016-05-28 15:07:32
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
In Craig Shaw Gardiner's =Ebenezum= series, the eponymous mage runs afoul of a rhyming demon named Guxx Unfafaddo, who finds a spell that makes Ebenezum allergic to his own magic. After a volume or two, Ebenezum returns the favor and the rhyming demon is reduced to blank verse. Whenever a rhyme slips in, the magic of Guxx Unfafaddo goes rhyming-demon haywire. That's the brobdingnagian sort of wire that gets tangled in a brobdingnagian sort of hay-baler.
The likely link between the Brat (Naughty, Naughty Girl) that Airen indulges in and the irregular home in which she grew up had me wondering whether you crafted that link deliberately.
1,688 2016-05-28 12:59:38
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
In re Slow Chapters: Slow does not mean uninteresting, especially when Airen gives her opinion of her mother in very plain language. How much did Marion's character and Airen's coming-to-terms with it shape the Brat? Airen's a fascinating character and I suggest playing her a little more strongly when you can.
(And what did her Mage With An Itch remark allude to? Dr. Freud would like to know ... )
1,689 2016-05-25 04:31:15
Re: NorthernSkies or NS - Janet (213 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
amy s wrote:I plan to write alternate endings and let people pick.
I pick the one where they're celebrating at the end and then a Mar shows up unexpectedly and eats everyone.
I pick the one where the Mar shows up and Tazar and Alda execute Plan 4
1,690 2016-05-24 05:22:50
Re: NorthernSkies or NS - Janet (213 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
But ... still something remains undisclosed.
1,691 2016-05-23 08:06:58
Re: The Sorcerer's Progress (1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
A plan, I have, to Easter-egg one of the most outrageous and iconic conspiracy theories of the age. I could tell you what it is, but if the conspiritheorists are right you wouldn't be able to read ..... anyway. And not all of it will come in Book 2.
1,692 2016-05-23 01:41:42
Re: The Sorcerer's Progress (1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
A couple more days on Day 2. I do want a contrast between what Mamma expects and how Merran actually manages.
1,693 2016-05-23 00:30:49
Re: NorthernSkies or NS - Janet (213 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Actually, it's from Steelman (Green).
1,694 2016-05-22 21:25:07
Re: NorthernSkies or NS - Janet (213 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
A small (groundhog meat) correction on that Standardese quote: A =type derived by a derived type definition= may be further derived if the derived type is used as parent type in another derived type definition.
1,695 2016-05-21 18:48:33
Re: NorthernSkies or NS - Janet (213 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Malcom Turnbull Wants to Destroy Australian Literature -- linked via The Passive Voice.
1,696 2016-05-20 07:03:29
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
It's going to depend on what the story is. I'd rather have the story begin in the right place. Noi and his sister have a perilous hatching and a perilous early life. Make that good enough and you don't need the human conflict.
Is your back cover blurb going to say that the dragons are major characters, that their struggle is an essential part of the story? Then you're writing for readers who are prepared to accept them as protagonists ... so long as the story is good.
Heinlein started =Starship Troopers= in an action scene, then went back and gave the history. But the struggle in his history was incidental. The struggle in yours is essential to the story.
There's a humorous example in =The Hunting of the Snark=, =Fit the Third=:
There was silence supreme! Not a shriek, not a scream, Scarcely even a howl or a groan, As the man they called "Ho!" told his story of woe In an antediluvian tone.
"My father and mother were honest, though poor—" "Skip all that!" cried the Bellman in haste. "If it once becomes dark, there's no chance of a Snark—We have hardly a minute to waste!"
"I skip forty years," said the Baker, in tears, "And proceed without further remark To the day when you took me aboard of your ship To help you in hunting the Snark.
"A dear uncle of mine (after whom I was named) Remarked, when I bade him farewell—" "Oh, skip your dear uncle!" the Bellman exclaimed, As he angrily tingled his bell.
"He remarked to me then," said that mildest of men, "'If your Snark be a Snark, that is right: Fetch it home by all means—you may serve it with greens, And it's handy for striking a light."
The start doesn't have to be an action scene. It has to be a point of departure, a place where the reader is ready to accept =Interesting Story Begins Here=. Action tends to involve jeopardy, so it's an easy place to start. But it's also a cheap start, almost a cliche.
Of course, if you're a fan of James Bond movies, opening with a chase scene that would be the high point of most movies is one of the conventions that define your genre. But compare that to the opening of =The Fast and the Furious=. I've never watched past the opening, but that opening is a =story= of its own, not just smash-crash-wake-to-find-Amy-suturing-you.
Make us care whether tha dragons survive. Make them characters-- Actually, you've already done that. Their opening is stronger that the openings of your human characters.
1,697 2016-05-19 14:45:06
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
"shouldn't be my focus" may miss the point. Yes, you need to find the end. But you have a problem you're solving here, too. You're developing skill and each obstacle is a skill to develop.
1,698 2016-05-19 08:06:36
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Erndog's review of your latest chapter.
Something to note: K's stories are about individuals in a milieu. Yours are about multiple people whose actions affect each other. The extreme prune that works for him may be disaster for you. It certainly would be disaster for me because my story is as much about the milieu as the characters.
When GRRM kills off a character, it's not to clear the field or to piss off readers. It's to cut off an avenue of hope. And people who might, with a nudge, have become heroes revert to their worst: Tyrion Lannister (if I remember the name aright) and the dragon woman.
1,699 2016-05-19 02:52:10
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
I'm talking about the action in a particular scene, as discussed in a particular review.
As to stripping characters away, I suggest you compare Star Trek TOS with just one plot per episode with TNG, which often had two, or B5, which usually had three and sometimes four. Amy doesn't have too many characters. She needs to linearize some places in her action.
You could pretty much solve the classic mystery =I the Jury= by watching who was left alive. Spillane got away with it, but it gets overworked. It also undercuts the Happy Ever After, and reduces the impact of the deaths. When Hedwig was killed, we knew where =Deathly Hallows= was going. We felt it, far more than we would have felt a random death at Antietam or Shiloh.
1,700 2016-05-19 00:38:52
Re: Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread (1,905 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Per Ern's review: Don't simplify, =clarify=. You've got a rich setting. Bring it to us!