In Project L I used the Ivory Pomegranate. Watch it show up in a major film and shunt me off too
401 2019-12-06 03:57:20
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
402 2019-12-02 23:51:43
Re: POV slip vs. reasonable assumption? (25 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Sorry to sneak in here and completely dodge the question, but I still question the the direction the camera is pointed. Choices:
a) a concentrating boy
b) a praying guy
c) a possessed woman strapped to a bed
Ah, but I understand his concentration is supposed to lead to the supernatural element that will soon enter the scene. Connor has perceived it first.
Can your POV character be given the ability to see the oncoming event rather than narrate someone else seeing it? I think that is the crux of the issue - he must make a conclusion about a reality he cannot perceive.
403 2019-12-02 12:40:09
Re: The Sorcerer's Progress (1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
What are you considering, structure-wise?
404 2019-12-01 23:14:11
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Eek! I've introduced 21 named characters in 12 scenes. Some have only bit parts and then disappear, but still...
Don't worry... once I reach the end, I'll be back with a list of which extras can get fed to the firing quad (aka villain team)
405 2019-11-29 19:19:16
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
I murdered your seance
406 2019-11-29 12:11:24
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Thoughts?
Scene doesn't scream possession to me. If anything, this sounds like a logistical nightmare.
I remember an old ghost story. I think it was called "Le dernier soldat" though google brings up too many results to find it at the moment. They did their supernatural attack as footprints marching across the room. Approach would reduce the amount of choreography needed.
407 2019-11-27 21:50:15
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Caution: This will make vampires real. Perhaps even expected.
408 2019-11-27 12:08:09
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Temper this with my at-odds approach, but I would have the POV character shiver and perceive demons. I would make the fear transcend to the narrator and let Connor do his own thing
409 2019-11-26 10:47:14
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
You & Ray make good observations.
I still question if Romano is needed at all, but I understand it'll be clarified near the end. Just understand I'm approaching the story from a different angle of "how do I settle into the heads of the movers and shakers"
410 2019-11-25 05:37:47
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Kdot fix: Delete the lines
411 2019-11-21 11:04:59
Re: Connecting chapters (Part Deux) (2 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Approach Sol. He may be willing to get them joined up for you as a one-time thing.
412 2019-11-20 01:26:02
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
I've seen the latter used in mainstream books, but I dislike it. How can startle be used intransitively? Just seems odd.
413 2019-11-15 12:05:56
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
As Memphis said aptly, I'll be able to help more on the prologue question after I've read the final chapters. This applies to all chapters between.
So, where's the rest of the story? Don't make me have to restart the cattleprod thread
414 2019-10-27 02:28:13
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
fifty. So many great targets for the killing spree
415 2019-10-26 15:34:15
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Believe it or not, the summary doesn't help. It tells me what the book is about, but not /how/ it plans to arrive there. Doesn't specify the order of events in the final three chapters and the culmination of execution.
Therefore in this chapter, I don't know yet which version contributes better
416 2019-10-26 10:52:29
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
I poked through it. I think I liked the pacing of the previous version better, but I won't know for sure until I read the final chapter so I can see that what the story is looking to accomplish
417 2019-10-09 00:50:37
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
A simple introduction is really beating you up
418 2019-10-08 23:12:20
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Anyway, keep going... I need to see like the first 75% of the story before I can offer anything useful to a chapter 2
419 2019-10-08 22:55:28
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Sorry too much "fact" for me first two paragraphs. But take that thought into context that I don't read this genre and have nothing to compare to
420 2019-10-07 22:15:19
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Re-red it. I question the presentation of data around the dialogue in question, but I need to factor in the scenes before it and after. The questions in my head are where are the highs in the chapter and where are the lows. How much do I care about Vitale or is it satisfying that me might get eaten.
421 2019-10-05 14:50:01
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
If it helps, I followed no such patterns in book 6, bringing in Marsha-1's POV for the first time in like chapter 8, and generally picking whichever POV best fit each scene (as opposed to alternating). Large chunks of the opening chapters had one POV. No one commented on it, so not sure it mattered
422 2019-10-03 00:38:41
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
No real need for him to tremble unless you have a particular story-wise need
423 2019-09-29 12:11:28
Re: Children in the Temple (8 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
You have arrived at the right place
424 2019-09-19 23:18:21
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
No never watched or read those
425 2019-09-19 22:35:50
Re: Savior of the Damned (the Connor series) by Dirk B. (1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
I wish I had a better understanding of the finer points of the genre ![]()