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I would suggest using the route which best works for what you want to relay at a particular time. In the telling of the story you will be guiding the reader to the next location regardless of where it is and in so doing the reader will understand the purpose of this location whether it is in the historical sequence or not.
Say you take a child to a place which was a part of your earlier life and explain what it meant to you during that time period and then you take him to another place you lived before the child was born and explain your time there; it will not matter to the child that the places you visit are not in the original order you are familiar with. The reader will understand that also within the context of the story presented. Make it easy on yourself in the writing. Simple is generally the correct solution. Good luck. Take care. Vern
As long as the stories connect in a reasonable manner in the end (the beginning would be a plus) then I see nothing wrong with the way you are presenting it. It's really a minimal version of a story within stories method of storytelling (The Arabian Nights being an extreme and well known version). Also, within most mysteries, separate parts of the solution don't come together until near the ending. The primarily separate story lines could be perceived as a "hook" for many trying to figure out how they will eventually connect. If you are convinced the story works as two halves, then that is the way you should proceed with confidence. Good writing. Take care. Vern
I would boil it down to, "If you ain't looking for criticism (that means pro and con) then you probably shouldn't be asking for reviews by publishing on a reviewing oriented site. " And if you're overly sensitive, you might want to bathe in salt water for a while to toughen the skin -- and before I get pelted with rotten tomatoes, no, that doesn't give license to rude behavior. Just my take. Take care. Vern
Number 5, nope, not true. I never quit. I POSTPONE for extremely long periods. Take care. Vern
GPyrenees wrote:I can post em but have zero time to reciprocate anything.... might piss off a lot of folks...
Recip not necessary. I'm to the point I mostly review what I want without regard for the norm. Take care. Vern
Way to go, GP. I'll jump on it when I get back from the beach; going to play in The World Amateur Golf Tournament (about 3000 participants of all ages -- and gender -- and handicaps) up and down the Grand Strand. Looking forward to seeing what you've done. Take care. Vern
An income level of $12,140 is considered poverty level in the U.S. in 2018 (25,100 for a family of four). An estimated 43 million people (100 million by some) live at or below the poverty level in America. It is highly likely that if 13 - 33 percent of Americans dropped dead form poverty you would have your concrete answer.
I might add that my family lived in so-called abject poverty until I entered an orphanage at almost nine and none of my family died from it. Absolutely the long term effects of poverty can kill, but not poverty per se. Still, in literature, we often speak in abstract or hyperbolic terms and there is nothing wrong with using such implied concepts in pointed prose. The author is the judge and jury for his work. My no food stamps worth. Take care. Vern
Hi, LL, it's a bit quiet in here. Still waiting on GP to post those Genesis chapters -- I'm starting to get gray, but other than that, all's well. Hope the rock is rolling down hill for you now. Take care. Vern
I see nothing wrong with "climb down/up" per se as it can denote a direction much like the points of a compass, but if the phrase draws attention from the author, one could restate the situation to avoid it entirely. Take the staircase example: "With his advanced arthritis, tackling the rickety staircase wouldn't be a walk in the proverbial park. Nonetheless, once he managed the journey, his old bones didn't squeak as much as those damn steps." Or such depending on context. There's always another means to the end. Take care. Vern
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Still not visible. Still makes no sense. Take care. Vern
How is it that an entry can be posted for The Strongest Start and not be available to read unless you make a connection with the author? Inquiring minds want to know. Makes no sense unless it is a bug left by the hacker trying to keep us in the dark. Take care. Vern
So, the site was hacked and evidently some posts were deleted (among other actions) to counter that activity; I suppose that is why a post that used to be in this space is no longer here. Perhaps Putin needs some good stories to tell The Donald the next time they get together. Think he might pay royalties? Okay, this ain't a political post; it's the beginning of a mystery thriller. Stay tuned. Take care. Vern
Marilyn Johnson wrote:I don't mind when our threads stray a little, but I do detest ultracrepidarians.
Learn something new every day. Thanks, MJ, for increasing my vocabulary. Must admit I'd never heard "ultracrepidarians" before so had to look it up. Learning new stuff is the best part of threads going off target at times. Take care. Vern
The VAST MAJORITY of threads veer off the strict topic of the original post at some point. Thank God for that. Think about it. If you can't get a group of people who witness an accident or anything else to agree on the details, then why would you expect everyone to see any subject in the forums in the same way and respond in a uniform way? It is not going to happen.
If we can't accept threads straying from the original subject, then we are going to be limited to very short threads which add virtually nothing to the pool of knowledge and die a quick death due to lack of participation. Variety is the spice of life for good reason -- boredom sucks and rarely teaches anything other than trying to avoid it. We keep trying to fix things that ain't broke until it is. Just my off topic opinion. Take care. Vern
Deckland Oz wrote:Rachel (Rhiannon) Parsons wrote:The omniscient POV is tabu because of editors who could block your access to your potential audience. And in "How to Write Good" manuals, they stress not using it. But with this era of everyone having his/her own printing press, we should simply do what makes the story work. Our only concerns should be consistency, flow, and clarity. There, I said it.
That omniscient narration is not favored by editors isn't some arbitrary thing. As originally employed, omniscient narration used a distinctive narrative voice, a la Charles Dickens. Using such a voice in contemporary fiction is anachronistic; a bit like driving to work in a Model T. But without that distinctive narrative voice, omniscient narration falls flat, and you end up with a lot of bland narrative summary, which is not good. This fact, plus the technical difficulty of maintaining a consistent POV, may be why most editors avoid omniscient narration.
If you don't have a working voice for the narrative, I doubt it makes any difference which POV you choose, so you might as well choose the one you wish to tell the story. If the voice is the problem why don't they just say so and stop all the pretense of the curse of the omniscient POV. And if all those editors were so perfect in their decisions we would never have all the rejections of what eventually becomes a best seller. No one way of writing is the Holy Grail no matter how many times it is repeated by editors or strict followers of the imperial decree. Some times the king loses his head. Just saying. Take care. Vern
I'm not sure why the omniscient narrator (POV) seems to be taboo among many reviewers. Many best selling and well received works were/are written in omniscient POV. It is a time tested method of narrating a story. I like that freedom to show things from all sides without being told "you can't do that, it makes my head hurt" or such. Everyone has preferences and what works for the author is really the deciding factor although if said author finds overwhelming opposition to the way it is presented, then they might wish to rethink their decision. You will never know unless you go down that road. Good luck. Take care. Vern
A quick fix might be to place a note in bold letters at the beginning of the chapter per se until such time as the formatting might be corrected. Probably more people would see it and read it that way. Take care. Vern
It could just be me, but I think the easiest fix would be to do away with the summaries. Personally, I don't understand why anyone would want to read a summary of what they are about to read. Why not simply read the story? I suppose someone's time might be too limited to read the entire story, but if that is the case, then it could be done in more than one sitting.
From my perspective, the only reason to read a summary would be to skip reading the story and perhaps do a regular review based upon the summary. I wouldn't (don't) make it that easy by providing such a summary. And it does solve any summary formatting problems -- which of course I didn't heretofore know existed. Just my thoughts. At any rate, good luck with the formatting. Take care. Vern
Semi-Colon (2004) - IMDb
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0427832
Directed by Drew Lewis, Matt Porter. With Drew Lewis. A story of a man, another man, and a big heavy briefcase.
Just for the horror of it. Take care. Vern
Temple Wang wrote:vern wrote:I'm forever getting called out on semi-colons. I have cut down, but still use them probably more than I should. They just look so cute, lol. Take care. Vern
LOL. Curse the naysayers. I like semicolons too; they help me direct the length of a pause in phrasing, like music.
PS: But, Vern, if they’re “so cute” is your excuse for using them, what’s the justification for the superfluous hyphen? ;-)
I suppose they're half-cute; that's my story and I'm sticking with it. Take care. Vern
I'm forever getting called out on semi-colons. I have cut down, but still use them probably more than I should. They just look so cute, lol. Take care. Vern
If you read The Lost Books of the Bible and the relatively recently discovered Gospel of Judas, you will find flaws galore to include deceit which could fill the vacuum of goodness for an always good character. Interesting reading even if you don't get some fresh ideas on character development. Take care. Vern
His "flaw" could be that he doesn't know who he is and is letting the church push him toward something he isn't sure of. He could also have flashbacks of memories of doing something terrible which he can't remember outright. You might also consider that stories outside the Bible which depict Jesus doing some pretty flawed stuff as a child. Your character could also have childlike outbursts of anger which he controls just in time to prevent a major "sin" or such. Or someone else could enter the picture and know things which others don't know about the character, even the character himself. And as Ann pointed out, the façade of perfection will be seen as a flaw by many; perhaps he flaunts it. Lots of angles. Good luck. Take care. Vern
John Hamler wrote:See? You need to keep an open mind, Vern! Open ears, too.
Ahh, that's the problem -- open ears hear too much and begin to hurt. Take care. Vern
John Hamler wrote:Rachel (Rhiannon) Parsons wrote:I was inspired by John Hamler's latest, so you know who to blame. A movie title, or a book title, with 'in space added.' To start it up:
Reservoir Dogs in Space.
OK, fine. Be that way. lol
Wait... How exactly did I inspire you, Rhia? Not that I don't wanna be an inspirational figure, but...
HOW THE HECK @ Twitter? Am I right?
Seriously, though... I've recently been inspired by a YOUTUBE trend where people react to popular music. The twist being that it's black people listening to hard rock and heavy metal for the first time/white people listening to rap and R&B for the first time. Honest reactions, they call it. And so... I thought it might be a nice writing exercise (perhaps even a contest) where me and my fellow TNBW'ers react to an unfamiliar song or musical genre in a "literary" way. In a way using narrative competence, that is. In order to argue the reasons why you, and other people, should or should not enjoy it.
For instance: If you love jazz, take a listen to Master of Puppets by Metallica and then write about the experience of hearing it. If you already love Metallica, take a listen to Take Five by Dave Brubeck and do the same. The possibilities are endless, actually. And fun. I think. Then again, I dunno. 
Cheers
John
It sounds interesting, John, but I don't know where they find people who have never listened to a particular type of music. I mean, you don't have to listen to all the time, but it's real hard not to hear it along the way somewhere, somehow. Like all these reality shows that ain't reality, but hell, folks still watch them like they are. Beats the hell outta me what their concept of reality is. At any rate, I'm game if you wanna set it up, but if you make me listen to rap for too long, you better have a good prize pool, lol. Take care. Vern
Posts found: 276 to 300 of 1,426
