2,001 Reply by Dirk B.

(5 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Alan, I found examples online from a grammar blogger that say your examples are the opposite of what they should be. If you have one wife named Diana, then her name is nonessential to understanding the sentence and requires commas. If you have one son named Scott, that also requires commas. If you have multiple sons, then his name is essential to understanding the sentence, so no commas.

That means, in my case, that the name of the epithet is essential to understanding the sentence as there are many epithets, so no comma.

I'll probably forget these rules in a week and start doing it wrong again.

Thanks
Dirk

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2,002 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Now I get it. Thanks.

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2,003 Topic by Dirk B.

(5 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Time to see if there's a consensus on this one:

Is the second comma below (after the word epithet) required? I think it doesn't belong because the name of the epithet, Bastardus Minusculus, is mandatory for understanding which epithet is being referred to. Or am I applying the wrong comma rule? (This is about a future society where the Roman Empire has been resurrected, hence the name Caligula.)

Although it took years for Caligula to be recognized for his brilliance, among the many side effects is that the epithet, Bastardus Minusculus, which had tormented Caligula throughout his youth, became an honorific awarded for extraordinary accomplishments in any field, similar to the coveted Noble Prize of the late second and early third millennia.

Thanks
Dirk

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2,004 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

I can't delete the first comma in the sentence since that would cause a misread.

Although it took years for Caligula to be recognized for his brilliance among the many side effects...

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2,005 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Comma question. Is the second comma (after epithet) required? I think it doesn't belong because the name of the epithet, Bastardus Minusculus, is mandatory for understanding which epithet is being referred to. Or am I applying the wrong comma rule?

Although it took years for Caligula to be recognized for his brilliance, among the many side effects is that the epithet, Bastardus Minusculus, which had tormented Caligula throughout his youth, became an honorific awarded for extraordinary accomplishments in any field, similar to the coveted Noble Prize of the late second and early third millennia.

Thanks
Dirk

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2,006 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Chapter 37 of v3, entitled Caligula!, is up. It's all minor changes from v2. However, I previously borrowed from this chapter to write v3 of the act I chapter Attack on New Bethlehem, primarily regarding the how the starlanes work. It needs rethinking. I like star-hopping as a concept and the natural interconnectedness of stars, but not the way the starlanes are described for the reader. I'm leaving it to v4 to properly define the starlanes and remove the redundancy that currently exists between this chapter and the aforementioned battle in act I.

Only four chapters to go in v3!

Quick, go read!
Dirk

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2,007 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

I decided to take a break from investigative/CSI research and watch an action film recommended by Netflix. I've already forgotten the title, but it starred Angelina Jolie, Morgan Freeman, and James McAvoy. You'd think with that cast, I would be entertained, but no dice. I turned it off after an hour. I don't remember the last time I saw an action movie that I enjoyed. Maybe the early Terminator films. I binge watched 13 Reasons about bullying and teen suicide. They're out with a second season. Boy that is hard to watch. I had to watch episodes of Friends in between episodes of 13 Reasons because it's so dark. I would not recommend it for young teens, even though they would benefit from a lot of it. There are other ways to talk to kids about bullying and sex than that show.

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2,008 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,528 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

NJC, is photobucket free to use, or do you have to pay for storage?

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2,009 Reply by Dirk B.

(9 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

That is really good, njc!

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2,010 Reply by Dirk B.

(9 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Here's my opening line:

“Battle stations!” Vice Admiral Alexis St. James cried from the bridge of the Realm of Stars destroyer, the RSS Almighty.

I'm almost certainly going to self-publish, so I take the editor's comments with a huge grain of salt. He says prologues suck, but it's okay to have flashbacks. Same damn thing in my opinion, just organized differently. The advantage of the prologue is that it comes at the beginning, before the main story starts, and then you're done with the past. Flashbacks require forcing your reader into the past one or more times in the midst of the main story. Both have their uses, but I prefer the former.

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2,011 Topic by Dirk B.

(9 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

I'm a member of a blog written by an experienced book editor. His list of rules of how NOT to open a story includes:

Prologues suck.
Do not start with a character who is going to die.

I guess I'm not going to use him to edit my story. :-)

What not to do: https://thejohnfox.com/2016/11/how-to-start-a-novel/
What to do: https://thejohnfox.com/2017/03/30-super … h-writers/

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2,012 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Kill me now. Countless hours of boring crime/investigative shows and only four pages of notes to show for it.

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2,013 Reply by Dirk B.

(1 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Never mind. I finally found it.

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2,014 Topic by Dirk B.

(1 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Hi. I've maxed out on groups and would like to leave one. Can someone please tell me how to leave a group?

Thanks
Dirk

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2,015 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Well, I'll be damnare! Amazon Canada has finally added video and music to its prime membership. It includes the latest seasons of CSI. I was hoping for the early seasons with the original characters, but it's a start. I have 30 days to cancel, so we'll see what else they've got. No Law & Order or Big Bang Theory, so those are strikes.

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2,016 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Kdot wrote:

My comma separates two thoughts. My teachers always said (Paraphrased) "toss in a comma if you want the reader to pause, even if there wouldn't normally be a comma".
That said, I would normally strike out that comma in a revision

My teacher always said, "Toss in a comma until Seabrass flags it as an error."

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2,017 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

But then we have this from a grammar website: A DEPENDENT CLAUSE ALSO HAS A SUBJECT AND A VERB, BUT
LACKS INFORMATION NECESSARY TO CONVEY A COMPLETE IDEA.
Note the comma and the word 'but' in the above sentence. The coordinating conjunction 'but' is used with a dependent clause, all preceded by a comma. This usage matches what Kdot did.

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2,018 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

njc wrote:

I wouldn't place a comma there, no matter what the fughazi stylebooks change.  See my lecture over in Premium.

Your lecture was mind-bending. I couldn't follow it. I'll just assume you're correct. Kdot, shame on you for generating so much palace comma intrigue.

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2,019 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

I ran this through Grammarly and ProWritingAid, and they had no objections: Tia thought, they might have more, landing areas, closer to, the center, but couldn’t, make any out.

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2,020 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Bzzt! The second clause is dependent, so I'm not used to seeing it written with a comma, regardless of whichever conjunction you use.

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2,021 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

To me, it's the ideal vacation getaway.

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2,022 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Just found Inside the Mind of a Serial Killer on Netflix. The killings take place in Australia. Queen Aussie lives! Just when I had decided to punt her from Galaxy Tales.

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2,023 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Thanks. No Dexter up here either. I'll start with what I've got. Worst case, I can always buy a few DVDs of CSI or Criminal Minds. Surprisingly pricey up here. Obviously, the distributors still make too much off DVDs to bother with streaming. There are similar shows on Netflix, though, so I'll plow my way through them first.

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2,024 Reply by Dirk B.

(23 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

j p lundstrom wrote:

Could somebody parse this, please?

To celebrate his book's arrival on the New York times best seller list Dirk and his twin brother Dallas spent the night drinking and carousing as if they were back in college.

Is it too late to go back to Norm d'Plume?

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2,025 Reply by Dirk B.

(1,461 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Tomorrow I have to begin binge-watching murder/CSI-style shows to get up to speed on writing a compelling supernatural serial killing. Unfortunately, CSI (the series), Criminal Minds, and Law & Order are not available on Netflix in Canada. Found a bunch of stuff that looks promising, though. One revolves around the FBI and another around a new special team assembled in Europe to fight crime across borders in the EU.

If anyone knows of any good serial killer series or films, please let me know.

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