2,751

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

OIC. Thanks.

2,752

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Can someone please tell me if this is worded correctly (Amy, I think this is one of the cases you referred to.)

The Samurai brought his right hand up hard and fast to smack Apollo. He felt the urge to block with his left arm, which he did easily.

My question pertains to the use of the word "He" at the beginning of the second sentence. When you read it, do you think it refers to the Samurai or to Apollo? It's meant to refer to Apollo, but my brain defaults to the Samurai.

Thoughts?
Dirk

2,753

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Amy, I received a full review from you yesterday, includng closing comments. I still need to respond to it.

2,754

(1,634 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

You make a lot of assumptions about me, way more than I can be bothered to address. So I'll just continue with the game. The next words that come to mind are:

Bite me.

2,755

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Turns out TNBW can host the images directly. I gave up on it though. The table format doesn't look good. I was trying to include a timestamp on each post in the Royals forum.

2,756

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Thanks. Now to find a hosting site.

2,757

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Where did you host them from and how did you link them into your chapters?

2,758

(1,634 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Et tu, Brute?

2,759

(1,634 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

I wish I was in Dixie...

2,760

(1,634 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Where did we leave off with our game? Oh, yes, krem brewlay.
I suggest we resume with: teerameesoo.

2,761

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Is there a way to imbed Word tables (or images of the tables) within my chapters online? Tom Oldman mentioned that he hosts the images elsewhere and then links to them, but I think he was referring to images in thread posts. Have any of you done it? Embedding a table would be ideal, since that's probably what I'll use for the layout within the book. Images will do as a fallback. It's for a collection of fictional forum posts. I want them to look more structured than is otherwise possible with regular text formatting.

Thanks
Dirk

2,762

(1,217 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

K, there were a total of seven instances of hard/harder in my latest chapter. Thanks for catching that. Apparently, I'm completely blind to them. Time for some quality time with thesaurus.com.

Do any of your books ever explain what happened at Earthwound? I don't remember reading anything about it. Earthwound figures prominently in these books, but not the explanation. Or does it come later?

2,764

(107 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Dill Carver wrote:

...
I guess they'll be a rush of entries before the deadline.

they'll should be there'll. I only point this out because you made it quite clear this evening your love of correct word usage. Truce?

2,765

(1,634 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Dill Carver wrote:

Why do North Americans feel a compulsion and the sense of entitlement to hijack bastardise and dumb-down every word they find personally inconvenient? 

Ignorance, arrogance or both?

Neither. My phone's Swype software offered up brule, so i went with it. Pardon me for not crawling out of bed, powering up my computer to use my French-English keyboard, and googling the correct spelling to play a fun word game with people, most of whom I know well enough to know they would never be offended by a typo.

Aren't you a pleasant little fellow....

2,766

(12 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

There are "multiple" views of the corridor outside the bridge. I never specify how many. No drones. The bridge is the nerve center of the ship, and has to be protected, so plenty of cameras.

2,767

(12 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Thank you, Gacela. It needs tweaking as suggested by graymartin, but I'm very pressed for space in that chapter (20 pages!), and it is a battle scene, so telling seems reasonable. However, I thought the description of the colonel's actions was showing, which is why I was scratching my head when I was told it was telling.

2,768

(12 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Very helpful. Thank you, all.

Here's one I have that stubbornly refuses to be trimmed of wases and weres. NJC and Janet Reid helped me get it down to three at one point, but as I added detail, it crept back up to five. This could be a good exercise for a writing class. :-)

Seven-year-old Apollo Julius Caesar III sat with his half-brothers in the game room of Domus Augusti, the Imperial palace in Rome, Italy on Earth. The brothers were perched in floating chairs in front of a galactic simulator made up of four command and control stations, one per child. Caligula was a year older than Apollo, and the twins, Romulus and Remus, a year younger.

As the only child of the Imperator and Imperatrix, Apollo was sole heir to the Imperium Romanum, and was guarded round the clock by a quartet of Candidatii, elite members of the Imperator’s Praetorian Guard. Unlike Apollo, his brothers were non legitimus — illegitimate sons of the Imperator.

2,770

(12 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

I should add that the person watching the video is the colonel's commanding officer and knows him well. I thought the conclusions she draws regarding 'in response' and 'undaunted' were quite reasonable. It's how she perceives those moments about him.

I had the exact same issue as rhiannon. I told the entire tale from the POV of my two MCs, Joseph and Apollo, alternating back and forth between them on a chapter-by-chapter basis. A secondary character, Caligula, was there as an antagonist. I decided to bring in his POV near the end when I needed the reader to think Apollo was dead. It's one of my favorite chapters in the whole book. I'm now rewriting to foreshadow his surprise role in that chapter.

2,772

(12 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Can someone please tell me if the paragraph below is showing or telling. It's written from the POV of someone outside the scene who is watching this on video. I was just told this is telling.

Soon, weapons fire targeted the Marines from three sides as Classiarii forced their way through other hatches. The Marines were hopelessly outnumbered. In response, Colonel Montford stood up and walked purposefully into the heaviest stream of oncoming fire, taking out one Imperial after another until they blew off his left arm at the shoulder. Undaunted, the heavily muscled man continued firing his crisper with one hand, yelling wildly as he moved relentlessly forward, his eyes bulging from their sockets. Blood gushed from his wound. The Marines rose and followed his lead, causing the enemy to fall back in fear. Montford’s troops chased them down the passageways as the colonel dropped dead to the deck.

Thanks
Dirk

Thank you, sir. I sent a PM to Sol asking about hosting images/tables. Perhaps there's a way.

Thanks, Tom. I'm surprised we can't host the actual image here on the site.

What will happen to your Japanese characters when you publish? Kindle allows resizing of regular text. Do the images automatically resize as well?

Can someone please suggest an image file type that translates well into book format? Compression ratio? Also, how to insert it into chapters here online. I have a fictional "forum" in my book and would like it to include posts from multiple users, including the poster's name, the text, and a timestamp. Ideally, something that resizes automatically depending on what device the reader is using to read with (phone, tablet, PC). Should I use a Word table instead?

Thanks
Dirk