Hello.

I've always championed a system where you get back a tenth of the cost of posting for each different review you receive. After ten reviews, your posting is essentially free. This promotes reviewing and kinda pushes a writer to post work that's either already pretty good or shows improvement. I know I'd appreciate ten reviews on anything I post, and I would sure be willing to recip. It would also help small groups (of ten or more) to become better writers and reviewers. That's how it works in the real world when writers get together to critique and such. The groups I've been in seldom hit the ten person mark, though, so there is that- the review group here would be larger and provide a more diverse range of comments.

Them's my thoughts.

27

(3 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

I sometimes drop right into the middle of things. What I tend to look for is what I'm reading clear? Does the dialogue sound true? Is the action realistic? And the usual inline stuff we tend to harp on.

I know I won't have the overall gist of things (unless I've been skimming) and that I can't comment on character development or if the plot runs consistent. But I do look for inconsistencies within the part I'm reading, like if a character has a blue hat at the start, is that hat also blue at the end?

So while you're dropping in and are limiting yourself on what you can comment, you can still offer something of value within the submission you're reviewing. Even if it's only to find a typo or two.

I copy from WordPerfect into Word. Then from Word, I paste into the site using the little button on the toolbar for that purpose (the clipboard with the small W in it). Most of my formatting comes out intact. The only issues are my section breaks. I have to go back and re-center them. Otherwise, that's the process that works bestest for me. Once the text is in the box, you can select it all and apply a new font and point size.

29

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

It's what you don't see that sometimes works more gooder. Originally I did have more details but decided to forgo them. I think it works better.

Easily fixed, actually:

Nnamani told Connor, “I’ve enjoyed hearing about your pilgrimage. I suspect we’ll meet again.”
Connor smiled, bowed at Nnamani's blessing, and left.
The cardinal told Romano, "I'm...

You absolutely want to avoid pronouns (male or female) that refer to two different males or females in the same sentence. In your example, you have too many males for the pronouns to be clear. But those are easy to fix most times.

Hope this helps!

31

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

So! I've posted all the chapters of Part I of Terrorcruise. Seems like a good point to take a short break. I plan now to focus on completing the first draft of my other science-fiction novel, Maiden. That one's closer to being done than not. Writing it has revealed timeline irregularities that I'll need to fix for the revision (among other inconsistencies and deficits). For those of you struggling along with me, take heart! This draft will be finished in February, no doubt about it. I figure five or six chapters remaining. Whee!

What follows will be decided in the weeks to come.

Hello, Sol.

Any news about the Strongest Start contest? There was mention in the rules that a list of six finalists would be announced four weeks after the contest closing date, which was September 28th. Then the winners around November 15th. Just curious to hear how the results are progressing, and if the list of those six finalists has been determined.

Thank you.

33

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Kdot wrote:

Ahoy... where ye be? Storing up points after that giant mammoth contest posting?

Recovering from surgery. Had something of a little crisis. Finding it hard to sit and focus on writing. But every day moves me closer to putting butt in chair. I'll get back into a groove at some point.

34

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Yeah, but all the other maidens have rubies and emeralds and diamonds. Only Crystel has crystals!

35

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Oh! Ha ha ha! Well, later it's revealed Creator used crystals to create her organic chord. I thought her name should reflect that, but I didn't want to use 'Crystal'. Hence, Crystel. I think it works. What say you?

36

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Made it an entirely new posting to ensure it got into the contest. The first time I posted chapters for In Possession, they didn't reach the contest because the original was posted way back before the beginning deadline. This, as a new 'book', ensures it gets in. Which it has. So no waste of credits. I did the same for my contest entries on In Possession of N-ergy. Iffins you want credits, give them a look. I added chapter prefaces to sneak in information I otherwise couldn't work into the prose.

37

(20 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Are you a good swimmer?

38

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Well, roll on with them abundantly powerful eyeballs. Between the empty hole that is the pupil (well, there is a lens in there but since it's transparent (for them cataract-free characters, anyway) we'll ignore it) and the ring of color that is the iris, surrounded by that mostly white (though sometimes jaundiced yellow or blood-vessel squiggled) sclera, there's a heaping helping of expressive nuance there. Blaze, twinkle, flash, flush, and emote away!

Is the part that 'blazes' the same part that 'twinkles'? Maybe it's the upper eyelids that blaze and the lower eyelids that twinkle. Or the left eye can blaze furiously in wrath and the right eye twinkles in mischievous mirth- but only on Sundays and Tuesdays (in winter). When the eyes blaze, can a character look about, or does the blazing singe too many eyebrows and eyelashes? Do the nostrils flare? And what do them lip things do? (Character's probably eating, so they're kinda stuck keeping food and drool in place.)  Nothing captures emotions like eyebrows scrunching though, whether it's in consternation or vexation or mere puzzlement- wait, don't they rise in puzzlement? Or is that befuddlement? (Right now one of my own is scrunched while the other is raised very Spock-like as I puzzle my way through my vexing consternation.) And let's avoid talk of whether the forehead is furrowing or other wrinkles are crinkling- that's just going overboard.

Too bad them white globes can't change color. Then the eyeballs themselves can become completely expressive. Wait, we're authors! Who says them white eyeball globes (otherwise known as sclera) can't change from unexpressive (inexpressive?) white to blushing pink to enigmatic purple to blazing red or twinkling green? Them eyes can already blaze and twinkle and who knows what else! Nothing like color-coding to let the other character(s) noticing them blazing or twinkling eyes know exactly what's going on. (Hopefully we're not in first-person POV when the POV character's eyes blaze and twinkle, unless there's a mirror conveniently nearby.)

Too bad we don't have gills on our necks. I imagine they'd be able to flap furiously or purse themselves disapprovingly. Wait! We're authors...

40

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

No. Unless 'melancholy' is a shade or hue of brown. Which it ain't. Use the whole facial and body expression to describe it: Her shoulders sagged, her chin hung low,  and her wrinkles deepened as she sat in her rocking chair, quiet and alone, undisturbed by any of her sixteen children, who'd flown the coop decades earlier. Sometimes she smiled, caught in memories of days long past. The setting sun turned her brown eyes the shade of sadness and despair reserved for those in the deepest throes of depression. I'll always remember that shade; a brown less diarrhea and more dog-turd.

My issue is with 'Joseph pleaded'. Let the dialogue do the pleading. Let the speaker tag just say 'said'.

As for the second line, I might do an action instead: God was silent for a moment. "Her time has come, Joseph. Have faith."

42

(5 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Make your POV character blind. Problem solved!

43

(4 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

MS Edge? There's your problem. Download and use Chrome. I've never had an issues, even on my phone. At least give it a try. If it doesn't work, you ain't not lost nothing none.

That would be my first recommendation.

44

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Hello.

Still writing. Trying to finish Maiden's first draft. Not gonna post, though. Making changes, having later chapters reflect changes I will incorporate into next revision. Easier for me that way but way too confusing for the reader. So... yeah. No activity from me for a while.

45

(3 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Hello, SolN.

Any news? Just curious. Cost me a pretty penny credit-wise to publish these. Want to make sure they get into the contest. And I still can't figure out why it's being rejected, so I do hope it's a bug under the hood, and not something from my end.

Thank you.

Hello, SolN.

I republished the first three chapters of my novel, In Possession N-ergy, for the Strongest Start 2018 contest. I believe I followed all the rules. For some reason, though, my posts are ineligible. Can you take a look and explain why? I've looked over the rules time and again and can't figure out what I'm doing wrong.

Thank you.

47

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Lynne Clark wrote:

Which software was the bad software? I'm doing good with LibreOffice, except it loses the spaces sometimes when I post here, making my postsalllookasifiamwritingTwitterhashtags

The software I had a sudden and inexplicable problem with was Scrivener for Windows. Somehow the save and make back-up features got all screwy. So I just switched back to WordPerfect and I use Dropbox to save my files so I have access to them wherever I can get internet. Never had an issue with WordPerfect. I think I'll stick to that for my novels.

48

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Hello.

Ran into a small software snafu. Had to repair some chapters of Maiden. All is well now. Will be hard at work on the next chapter. It portends to be a longish one with Scrounger as the POV character. Lots of exposition in this one. I hope to have it posted Friday. Then hopefully another by Monday morning. Switched from the bad software back to using WordPerfect X8.

Thank you for your patience. For my writing, it has not been a good couple of months.

49

(52 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Hello, kdot.

Well, she does yell at poor old Ms. Lawson, the upstairs neighbor. Maybe I can have Gina thinking about going upstairs to give her a whack or two.

I don't know if I shared this, but I was considering adding a couple wee paragraphs explaining how she's getting over probably a bout of influenza passed on to her by a delivery driver-- she remembers him coughing, sweating, looking like shit, and he sneezes on her-- and with her sore throat, have her wonder if she has strep throat, which she seems to get every year (but this month? Last month? What month is it? Certainly not April, that's for sure). Those together would account for her headaches, sore throat, body aches, fever, chills, sweating. I did originally intend to add those, but just plum forgot, honestly. I think adding those would help a bit.

Don't forget, though, Gina's not all there. Her inner logic drives her, and it's pretty consistent, as warped as it is. So her whacking her sister at the end falls right into line with her processes. There's no real good guy/bad guy here. Just giving the reader a glimpse into her descent. Adding the strep throat and lingering flu issues might even create more sympathy for her. She's going to find that nit come what may. Taking out her sister will do that for her.

Word sucks. Plain and simple. I use WordPerfect and Scrivener. The only reason I have Word is to post here (Word makes it the most easiest) and to do document notes with others using the mark-up feature. Otherwise, I stay away from Word.

Never read you Jenna story. Didn't know about her violent ways. If there's any similarities, it's purely coincidence.

Think that covers it.

And Chainsaw I think is better than Nit. Just my opinion.

50

(8 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Hello, Lynne.

From the reviews of my ginormous short stories, you should have enough credits to re-post this a few times even. Ha ha ha!