Topic: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

I have had a lot of questions/corrections about my use of titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan. So I'm now wondering if I should change them.

Originally I wanted to use Brythonic titles but found that the majority are lost. (And I felt that having a much of strange words mixed in with all the strange names could spell disaster!) So I put English ones that were not too tied to French or Anglo-Saxon cultures. King. Lord. Chieftain. But now these seem to be giving me more trouble then they are worth.

King was easy (direct translation)

Lord came from Lord of Man who was the supreme ruler of that little island at one time.

Chieftain from Celtic clan system.

For simplicity's sake of their wives were called "queen", all of their sons call "prince", and all of their daughters "lady".

I thought it worked. Haha! It seems I am so wrong!

I guess the Question is: Change titles? Or hope that a general readership accepts them as is?

The most "culturally correct" would be: great king, middle king, lesser king. But it sounds too long.


"Prince Ritegern," Middle King Amlawdd said, "we shall wait."
"She is coming," one of the middle kings said.
...
"We have heard the words of the elder middle king," said another...
...
"I am aware of my tardiness, Middle Kings," Lasy Esshylt said...

-I just don't feel that "correct" works well here. Seems too long and cumbersome.

I could also use the Old Gaelic titles instead. Although I will have the problem of more strange words added into strange names. Also Gaelic and Brythonic are actually divided so the titles are same (and thus spelled differently).

I could also just change "lord" (which seems to be the problem word) to the Welsh "rhi" and thus only have one strange word added.

"Prince Ritegern," Rhi Amlawdd said, "we shall wait."
"She is coming," one of the rhi said.
...
"We have heard the words of the elder rhi," said another...
...
"I am aware of my tardiness, Rhis," Lady Esshylt said...

-To me this works better then using "middle king" but I am a little concerned about having it alone. If I put "The rhi entered and bowed to Drech." would the reader remember that it is a ruler and start thinking it is some kind of animal or a druid or something else?

Any thoughts?

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

Rhi as a pleural sounds like a name to me.  However, I like the idea of changing lord to Rhi.  If you added their name after, it would distinguish between them. 

Most American fantasy readers will understand 'High King' as a title because of Arthur.  Middle and Lesser King is cumbersome (so I agree with you on that)

Is there a comparable term for 'Middle King'?  Otherwise, could you call them magesties or something like that?

FYI, I like how you've given examples in the story to put this choice in perspective.

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

High King, King, and ??? .  'Baron' is a modern title and likely wouldn't work.

Whatever you use, you'll need to introduce it repeatedly in the early chapters of each book.

You might be able to get away with introducing the system and the ranks in each volume, and identifying a King's rank each time he comes into the story, and thereafter calling him 'King' until he drops out and returns, as though you were reminding us of a person's last name.

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

And here I thought my titles were tricky to get right.  Anyways, here my opinion goes.

Rebecca Vaughn wrote:

I have had a lot of questions/corrections about my use of titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan. So I'm now wondering if I should change them.

Originally I wanted to use Brythonic titles but found that the majority are lost. (And I felt that having a much of strange words mixed in with all the strange names could spell disaster!) So I put English ones that were not too tied to French or Anglo-Saxon cultures. King. Lord. Chieftain. But now these seem to be giving me more trouble then they are worth.

King was easy (direct translation)

Lord came from Lord of Man who was the supreme ruler of that little island at one time.

Chieftain from Celtic clan system.

For simplicity's sake of their wives were called "queen", all of their sons call "prince", and all of their daughters "lady".

I thought it worked. Haha! It seems I am so wrong!

I guess the Question is: Change titles? Or hope that a general readership accepts them as is?

Historical novels need to be accurate, but then again, it can't be.  There are so many conflicting works and research it's not even funny.  My personal approach is, be consistent i.e. I don't switch between two sources because it suits me all of a sudden, so I've selected the ones I'm using (and that agree with each other) and I'm using them and only them (it's still recognised resources though!).  I doubt a general reader would be too concerned what you use though and the ones that's done some research and disagree, at least you can point them to your resources.  Honestly, I think they would much rather prefer it's not complicated to follow.  So I guess what I'm saying is, no need to change titles as long as it is based on some accurate source/origin and not overly complex.

Also, if you call the sons prince, the daughters should in all likelihood be princesses.  I'm avoiding royalty like the plague in my books and haven't met the Queen yet, so I can't advise how to address royalty correctly.  (It's a good thing I haven't met the Queen, because the conversation would go something like this:  Nice to meet you, Queen.  Say, I'm writing a book and really would like to use the correct forms of address.  Do you have a spare hour to help me out with this?  Thanks mate!" - because of course she's going to agree and jump up and down from excitement, I'll even thank her on the front page.)

Rebecca Vaughn wrote:

The most "culturally correct" would be: great king, middle king, lesser king. But it sounds too long.

"Prince Ritegern," Middle King Amlawdd said, "we shall wait."
"She is coming," one of the middle kings said.
...
"We have heard the words of the elder middle king," said another...
...
"I am aware of my tardiness, Middle Kings," Lasy Esshylt said...

-I just don't feel that "correct" works well here. Seems too long and cumbersome.

I disagree.  This is so unique!  A work-around your issue that it seems too long might be to introduce X, Y and Z as great, middle and lesser king at the start of each major scene and simply call them king from then on.  It shouldn't be a problem and based on what I know from titles, it won't be too far off to what probably happened in reality.  Most research is done on the written words left behind from those good old days, and there are massive differences even today between how you would address a titled person in writing vs. in speech.  Have to love it, otherwise you'd go nuts!

To give you an example - Duke is "Your Grace", Marquess/Earl/Viscount/Baron are all "My lord" even though a marquess is higher ranked than an earl, an earl than viscount and viscount a baron, and Baronets/Knights are "Sir".  So I see some parallels here with the "lords" where a great king, middle king or lesser king could all be addressed simply as "king".  It's not too much of a stretch because I guess the titles I use have been founded and based on the titles you are using?!

But having said this, you still need to be consistent otherwise some readers would pick it up.

Rebecca Vaughn wrote:

I could also use the Old Gaelic titles instead. Although I will have the problem of more strange words added into strange names. Also Gaelic and Brythonic are actually divided so the titles are same (and thus spelled differently).

I could also just change "lord" (which seems to be the problem word) to the Welsh "rhi" and thus only have one strange word added.

"Prince Ritegern," Rhi Amlawdd said, "we shall wait."
"She is coming," one of the rhi said.
...
"We have heard the words of the elder rhi," said another...
...
"I am aware of my tardiness, Rhis," Lady Esshylt said...

-To me this works better then using "middle king" but I am a little concerned about having it alone. If I put "The rhi entered and bowed to Drech." would the reader remember that it is a ruler and start thinking it is some kind of animal or a druid or something else?

Any thoughts?

If you're changing "lord" to "rhi", you'd also have to change "king" (all of them) and "chieftain" to Welsh to keep it consistent in my opinion.  This might make it really hard to read and keep up, as much as I love the concept.  The unusual names are already a steep learning curve for me and I have British blood in me!  And as Janet TP sometimes say, and it's true, readers don't have a long concentration span anymore, so it could be too hard (complex) to keep up with Welsh words/titles in between.

Not sure this helps, but let me know what you think and we can talk about it a bit more!
JR

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

njc wrote:

High King, King, and ??? .  'Baron' is a modern title and likely wouldn't work.

Whatever you use, you'll need to introduce it repeatedly in the early chapters of each book.

You might be able to get away with introducing the system and the ranks in each volume, and identifying a King's rank each time he comes into the story, and thereafter calling him 'King' until he drops out and returns, as though you were reminding us of a person's last name.

Looks like njc and I have the same idea!  phew!  smile

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

KHippolite wrote:

I'm probably catching more of these because of all the nostes I've been taking.

When A is named a king then B is married to A but B calls her husband a lord, I don't normally have any problem. But due to the important differences between lord and king, it really jumps out at me (eg imagine Lord Tedig as King Tedig).

http://www.skyfire.ca/Kwan/tnbw/Titles_Pendragon.jpg

So no, it's not the number of titles that's throwing me... it's consistency issues. All easy fixes.

You need someone like this!  I wouldn't pick it up otherwise since I sometimes get lost in the stories and forget I'm supposed to be reviewing!  smile

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

If I put "The rhi entered and bowed to Drech." would the reader remember that it is a ruler and start thinking it is some kind of animal or a druid or something else?

As K said, not a massive problem and I also doubt readers would think it's something weird, but it may "trip" the reader slightly before they make the mental connection and carry on reading again ...

Just a thought!  smile

8 (edited by njc 2015-01-06 15:03:07)

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

I've suggested that you spend a little more time describing your physical geography.  What if you introduced at the same time your political geography: who is ruling whom and what their respective ranks are?  This could provide both a logic and a gestalt to help the reader follow what's going on.  With that underlying your action and the character presentation that flows from your action, you might have a much stronger picture at little or no cost to the reader.

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

Another thought is to have one character explain the hierarchy to a young child, so the reader could be introduced without too much pain.  *Mother pushes her son toward the ruler.  "Bow to the Rhi, my child," she ordered.  "He stands one step below the High King and has earned our respect."*

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

amy s wrote:

Rhi as a pleural sounds like a name to me.  However, I like the idea of changing lord to Rhi.  If you added their name after, it would distinguish between them. 

Most American fantasy readers will understand 'High King' as a title because of Arthur.  Middle and Lesser King is cumbersome (so I agree with you on that)

Is there a comparable term for 'Middle King'?  Otherwise, could you call them magesties or something like that?

FYI, I like how you've given examples in the story to put this choice in perspective.

Hmmmmmmmmmm. You are right about "rhi" sounding plural. With so much Latin around it would just be confusing.

I think t the concept of "middle king" and "lesser king" was lost with the Anglo-Saxon conquest. The Teutons replaced the hierarchy structure with their own.

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

njc wrote:

High King, King, and ??? .  'Baron' is a modern title and likely wouldn't work.

Whatever you use, you'll need to introduce it repeatedly in the early chapters of each book.

You might be able to get away with introducing the system and the ranks in each volume, and identifying a King's rank each time he comes into the story, and thereafter calling him 'King' until he drops out and returns, as though you were reminding us of a person's last name.

Yes, like "count", "baron" screams Old French.

Maybe I need to work on title introduction... ?

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

KHippolite wrote:

I'm probably catching more of these because of all the nostes I've been taking.

When A is named a king then B is married to A but B calls her husband a lord, I don't normally have any problem. But due to the important differences between lord and king, it really jumps out at me (eg imagine Lord Tedig as King Tedig).

http://www.skyfire.ca/Kwan/tnbw/Titles_Pendragon.jpg

So no, it's not the number of titles that's throwing me... it's consistency issues. All easy fixes.

Yikes! If I call some one "Lord" and then "King" or the other way, it is probably in error! sad I will double check my titles!

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

Janet R

In trying to be consistent with ledgends which called the daughters of kings "ladies" but the sons of kings "princes", I reserved the title "princess" for women who are married to "princes". So every "Princess" is married (or widowed). And every "Lady" has never been married.

I see what you mean about being unique. Would it not be to confusing having rulers of different "levels"?

"But why was that not told to King Gurgust?” Drech asked.
“It is Lord Tedig who said fever,” the princess said.

would become:

"But why was that not told to Great King Gurgust?” Drech asked.
“It is Middle King Tedig who said fever,” the princess said.

14 (edited by Rebecca Vaughn 2015-01-06 19:40:09)

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

K, Janet R, NJC

"High King" is the Pendragon. So I don't actually use that term in my stories.

What if I used "Great" Middle" and "Lesser" on kings and queens both:
King Moilmut becomes Great King Moilmut
Queen Benadel becomes Great Queen Benadel
Lord Find becomes Middle King Find
Queen Gweldyr becomes Middle Queen Gweldyr


I can't add "great" "middle" or "lesser" to "prince" or "lady" as that would be inconsistent with the Brythonic titles and mess up one of my major plot points.

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

Janet R

If I changed all the titles to Welsh they would probably all turn into "rhi" sad

King Gurgust = Rhi Gurgust
Lord Hywel = Rhi Hywel
Chieftain Saefugul = Rhi Saefugul

So now I have the problem that Rhi Gurgust rules over Rhi Hywel who rules over Rhi Saefugul.

Now I'm confused!

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

K

I did a word search for "King Find" and didn't get anything. So, I must have already corrected that error. ... Or it was another "Lord" who got magically changed to "King"?

I'll check all of my titles.

I do have some people changing titles on purpose. (Lady Anna married and became Queen Anna, and Lord Cadell is made King of Powys and thus becomes King Cadell.) Maybe I need to explain title changes better?

17

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

I'd suggest skipping the modifier 'Middle' except perhaps when explaining.  But what about 'Low' for 'Lesser'?

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

NJC

Low would definitely work in place of Lesser! Good suggestion!

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

K


Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!
What you are telling me is that I didn't make an error! My titles are just too confusing!
Sigh.
I'll check them anyway. I had a few people who changed titles over the different drafts, so I need to make sure I didn't mess them up.

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

Rebecca Vaughn wrote:

Janet R

In trying to be consistent with ledgends which called the daughters of kings "ladies" but the sons of kings "princes", I reserved the title "princess" for women who are married to "princes". So every "Princess" is married (or widowed). And every "Lady" has never been married.

I see what you mean about being unique. Would it not be to confusing having rulers of different "levels"?

"But why was that not told to King Gurgust?” Drech asked.
“It is Lord Tedig who said fever,” the princess said.

would become:

"But why was that not told to Great King Gurgust?” Drech asked.
“It is Middle King Tedig who said fever,” the princess said.

Then again, how important is it to know the "level" of each king (or queen) at ALL TIMES?  I'd suggest only to differentiate between the levels when it's crucial e.g. when you introduce them.  The example you're giving - the important bit is not what level of king said what to what level of king, but WHO said or didn't say something to WHO.

therefore:

"But why was that not told to King Gurgust?” Drech asked.
“It is King Tedig who said fever,” the princess said.

should therefore be more than fine.

But say King Tedig walks into a room where King Gurgust is.  Then it would be important i.e.

Middle King Tedig bowed (or whatever they do) to Great King Gurgust.

One could argue by his action alone it should also be clear which king is on a higher "level" than the other, so even this should work and not be confusing (especially if the Great, Middle, Low concept has already been introduced - you would need to do this!):

King Tedig bowed when he entered the room.  "Great King Gurgust, I have been waiting for you."

ps - no probs with the ladies/princess issue!  Makes sense, and it would seem like that's the least of your problem!  smile

I hope I'm not making this worse!  But this is something I've never heard of (and maybe it's just me), and brings such a different level to the table, that I just love it!  But it's all up to you, as always!  smile

xx

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

Rebecca Vaughn wrote:

Janet R

If I changed all the titles to Welsh they would probably all turn into "rhi" sad

King Gurgust = Rhi Gurgust
Lord Hywel = Rhi Hywel
Chieftain Saefugul = Rhi Saefugul

So now I have the problem that Rhi Gurgust rules over Rhi Hywel who rules over Rhi Saefugul.

Now I'm confused!

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

As much as it would add to the "cool" factor, maybe this is also exactly the reason you shouldn't be using it at all?

22 (edited by janet reid 2015-01-07 08:24:58)

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

Rebecca Vaughn wrote:

I do have some people changing titles on purpose. (Lady Anna married and became Queen Anna, and Lord Cadell is made King of Powys and thus becomes King Cadell.) Maybe I need to explain title changes better?

If someone doesn't understand why Lord Cadell is now King Cadell after he was made King of Powys or Lady Anna is Queen Anna after marrying a king, I'd say they're probably not well suited to read historical novels .....

edit - K excluded, it's meant in general and not at all to what K's been saying or doing!!!!!!!!!  This is just to answer your question.  I think K's problem is consistency rather than complexity but K is better suited to be the judge on what he means ...  smile

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

Okay. Cool or not, Rhi is off the table.

It seems anything I use, I have to explain.

I'm going to have to think about this.

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

What about mid-King?  The translation would still be accurate this way.  What are the welsh words for high, middle and low/lesser?  Just curious.  Are there other translations for these words that you might use?

Re: Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan

amy s wrote:

What about mid-King?  The translation would still be accurate this way.  What are the welsh words for high, middle and low/lesser?  Just curious.  Are there other translations for these words that you might use?

Great King might be Nerthol Rhi but there are a lot of terms for "great" "mighty or "powerful" so I would have to do some Welsh Language research before I felt confident in a choice.

Middle King would probably be Canol Rhi (as Janet TP pointed out to me)

Lesser King would probably be Leiaf Rhi