Topic: Could you make it a novel?

Jerry Jones posted this in the Jones County Friends group on Facebook. Hilarious!

I Need To Poison My Husband
A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, “I would like to buy some cyanide.”The pharmacist asked, “Why in the world do you need cyanide?”
The lady replied, “I need it to poison my husband.”
The pharmacists eyes got big and he exclaimed, “Lord have mercy!
I can’t give you cyanide to kill your husband! That’s against the law!
I’ll lose my license! They’ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!”
The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in romantically entwined with the pharmacist’s wife.
The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, “Well now. That’s different. You didn’t tell me you had a prescription.”

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Could you turn it into a novel?

Re: Could you make it a novel?

Hilarious!  And of course you could make it into a novel.  If you don't, I will.  lol

3 (edited by max keanu 2016-07-23 20:02:59)

Re: Could you make it a novel?

I'd run it as a parody of Chinatown, but set in the 1970s, with the wife hiring a Jake-like P.I.  who then moves the plot and enhances your single theme encounter. THe main theme would be the ascendency of the mega-profit pharmaceutical industry, the death/disability of thousands by experimental or supposedly proven drugs foisted on a naive populace. The antagonist would be the pharmaceutical companies super secret agents or agent, who are part of a broader conspiracy to get full strength cyanide (Called by its medical name: Sighasnide, and marketed as a tick or leech remover) for death of an unfaithful spouse, or for other marital problems, into the market place, etc.

Tongue-in-cheek writing might allow story arc to ascend, but the conspiracy would have to be foiled in the end by the Jake like character. I'd think the wife deserves a negative fate at the end of story to discourage actual readers from poisoning their husbands.

I can see the product, Sighasnide, packaged especially for women, as women use poison for murder more often. But of course a men's version would also need to be made available... BitchOff! This would be a cyanide product created to keep in-heat female dogs away from male dogs... and would be sold over the counter without a prescription. And those in-the-know (and how to use it) would use it as a murder poison.

Re: Could you make it a novel?

Absolutely! Love it.