I just posted the home work for Dialogue Tags Home work lesson 3 part one. The examples of dialogue, hopefully, will be posted tomorrow.
27 2015-10-25 13:45:11
Re: Lesson Two (11 replies, posted in Dynamic Dialogue)
I have posted Lesson Two: Punctuation. Sincerely, John
28 2015-10-24 14:00:10
Re: Lesson One (16 replies, posted in Dynamic Dialogue)
Hello LAMackey: Sorry about that, I got in to much of a hurry. For some reason it did not sink in that you were going to use the writing sample for later classes. I appreciate the work you are willing to do to help the the writers taking your class. I made some corrections on the original sample re excess attributions. I have provided a new example with more dialogue that will provide a lot of fodder for future lessons.
Sincerely, John
PS I think lesson one is gone. It occurred to me later that you needed more time if you wanted to read my responses on lesson one. Do you want it re-posted? I actually deleted it, hence the review will be not be available.
29 2015-10-23 14:26:39
Re: Lesson One (16 replies, posted in Dynamic Dialogue)
I have just posted Lesson One: Mantra Exercises. Homework assignments 1, 2, 3.
I appreciated your comments and suggestion on my initial submission of dialogue. It did turn out to be a perfect example of dialogue with unneeded attribution errors.
I assume I should wait until I hear back from you before I proceed to the next lesson. Sincerely, John
30 2015-10-21 20:18:32
Re: WELCOME NEWCOMERS! (17 replies, posted in Dynamic Dialogue)
I posted the writing sample with the label Dynamic Dialogue Work Book to the Dynamic Dialogue forum. I have started on Lesson #1. I did home work exercises one and two. It is great fun. I'm looking forward to getting into exercise three tomorrow. Sincerely, John
31 2015-10-20 20:22:31
Re: WELCOME NEWCOMERS! (17 replies, posted in Dynamic Dialogue)
Hello LAMakey: My objectives are much the same as the others in the Dynamic Dialogue class. In many cases my characters all sound the same. This usually happens when I have people with similar backgrounds. I can do some regional dialects, and social and economic groups, but I need to learn to think about how to work this in more often.
I don't do transitions from person to person in a dialogue well. When I have a long section of dialogue, with a lot of back and forth, I start using too many attribution tags. This especially true if three or more people are in a scene.
Moving the character around while they talk is another problem. I also like to put in internal monologue as the dialogue proceeds.
However, right now the biggest problem I have is the over use of attribution.
Sincerely, John
32 2015-10-20 02:58:39
Re: WELCOME NEWCOMERS! (17 replies, posted in Dynamic Dialogue)
Sounds like I may lean something, I'll take the course. Sincerely, John
33 2015-10-19 20:17:59
Re: WELCOME NEWCOMERS! (17 replies, posted in Dynamic Dialogue)
Hello LAMackey
I noticed Dynamic Dialogue under New Courses on tNBW home page. I thought you were starting a new set of classes and I joined up. However, I may have been mistaken. I understand that the current program of classes end some time in November. If you plan to start a new class in Nov I will be interested, or if you want to make some other arrangement let me know. Sincerely, John
34 2015-09-30 01:52:46
Re: Chapter Word Length (26 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Danielle--I outline down to the scene level. I never know how many words each scene will take. As I go along I add scenes and delete scenes. For me a chapter is simply a set of scenes that are related to one another. I never know the real ending of the story until I get there.
35 2015-09-29 23:05:44
Re: Chapter Word Length (26 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I seem to be in the minority here. I outline. Actually I just started outlining when I decided to do a murder mystery. My current project consists of 23 chapters, and my longest chapter is 4535 words and my shortest is 1092.
36 2015-09-26 00:54:12
Re: My great self-editing secret (5 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I'm pleased to see someone has started a topic on editing. I am now in the beginning stage of the 1st edit of my novel Murder at Midnight. I have pushed version 0 off on all my good friends here at TNBW. The many comments and suggestion are greatly appreciated, but I know I have a long way to go. I have learned a great deal. I have read many novels, and quite a few good books on how to write. I should have known that the art of writing entertaining stories, above all took work, fortitude and an ability to shrug off disappointing results, and keep going. One of the early books I read was John Gardner's "The Art of Fiction." I guess, I failed to notice the subtitle, "Notes on Craft for Young Writers." One of his main themes for young writers stresses the learning process of reworking a story over and over and over. I am now doing this and I'm not getting any younger. It's hard work.
Creating a story isn't enough. I thought that once I had a solid plot and a cast of characters, I could just start writing. It seems to work for some people. However, I found that I needed an outline, but before I could do an outline I needed to write a synopsis. You know how it goes. I found some writing software I liked, and so I launched my first major fiction attempt. My goal was to write a murder mystery. Now my goal is to make that murder mystery readable.
The member of TNBW showed me that I needed to learn the basic rules for using commas. I'm getting better. I thought I knew the rules for writing and punctuating dialogue, but making the leap from knowing to doing has proven to be difficult. Reviewers have pointed out that my writing is often choppy, because I use a lot short sentences and seldom use conjunctions and dependent clauses. What I am trying to say is that I have finally reached the point where I may be able to improve up on my initial draft.
I am going line by line through each scene. My software included a reader and I'm finally using it. If I leave out a word it sounds odd. I realized I had to insert the word or the dumb reader would keep making the same mistake over and over. After reading a series of choppy sentences, I go back and combine sentences about the same things using a conjunction. Some times I can eliminate a short sentence by making it a subordinate clause. I even use a prepositional phrase now and then and put commas between adjectives. I know, it is amazing I ever got out of high school. All though I am excited about editing, I am finding it exhausting. Sincerely, John
37 2015-09-13 15:11:02
Topic: Posting the next version (0 replies, posted in Writing Tips & Site Help)
I am about to complete version 0 of Murder at Midnight. As I post version 1 of my novel I want those who have reviewed it in the past to get points if they are kind enough to review it a again. My plan is to add a new chapter 1, version 1, and delete the old Chapter 1. version 0. I will do this for each chapter as I complete version 1. I'm not sure how this is going to look on the site. If my plan is flawed be let me know soon.
I know there are several members who have used this option to publish new versions of their work. Give me a shout. Sincerely, John
38 2015-08-22 12:56:59
Re: avoiding very (1 replies, posted in Writing Tips & Site Help)
Very good, Ops, superb.
39 2015-08-03 14:03:22
Re: Site Bugs 2 (342 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I really like the new inline review format and the new regular review. However, I often don't know whether to do an inline or regular review unit I am well into a chapter. I use Microsoft One-Note to make notes as I read. I also copy lines of text to One-Note which I want to comment on. My problem is with the text I copy from the chapter. If I decide to do a regular review and copy my notes into the review box the text I copied from the chapter looks fine, but when I submit it the copied text disappears. The same seems to be true if I send a private message to another TNBW member. I have attempted to change my habits but once in a while I forget. When I paste into the box everything is there with no hint of a problem. When it is received on the other end the text copied from the chapter is gone. Sincerely, John
40 2015-07-27 21:05:53
Topic: Books on how to write (2 replies, posted in Cop Shop)
Even though I have reasonably good education I did not take any writing courses. In fact I only took the required English courses. I'm not sure why I avoided these opportunities. I have always like to read and I have had fantasies about writing history books and historical novels from an early age. However, after I retired from gainful employment, I decided to become an author. When asked to state my current employment status I put down writer. I had no idea of what it meant to be a writer. I took two adult education courses on writing fiction. It was a good experience. Both courses were focused on writing short stories. The instructors tried to keep it simple. We got to know a little about plot, how to write active rather than passive sentences, and something about point of view. We read short stories and did a few reviews as part of the process. Everyone in the classes had tried there hand at writing, but none of us knew much about the process. We didn't have a text book, a few suggestions were made about books we might read on writing if we were really interested.
I learned two things from these courses. (1)I enjoyed writing. (2) I knew nothing about how to write. So I started reading books by writers about how to write. I have read 24 books about how to write. At least three of them were worthless. The rest introduced me to a new world. One of the books I recommend to mystery writers who are new to writing novels is The Busy Writer's Tips on writing Mystery & Crime by Marg McAlister.
41 2015-07-27 13:42:00
Re: What's a "locked-room" mystery? (1 replies, posted in Cop Shop)
If I remember right dagnee's Sansalito started out as a locked room mystery.
42 2015-07-18 14:20:48
Re: How much truth do you put into your writing? (12 replies, posted in Thriller/Mystery/Suspense)
I've tried to put as much truth into BEDLAM - THE BEGINNING, and I'm uncertain how much should be footnoted. Any recommendations? What I've footnoted thus far I want to stand as it is without any embellishment into the story. Thanks.
Generally I don't like footnotes in fiction. I have written historical fiction which is fact based. However, the action is portrayed through fictional characters in the story. In these cases I use a one page account of my sources. Bernard Cornwell, who writes a great deal of historical fiction, often has a map page and a place name list at the beginning of his books. He often has a page or two at the end of his books in which he comments on the main historical sources he used as background for his story.
43 2015-07-16 18:02:41
Re: Paid Article Opportunity (4 replies, posted in Writing Tips & Site Help)
Sounds interesting. I'm learning a lot as I struggle through the process of becoming a writer. Like many of the members of this group I started writing late in life. I find writing to be rewarding. I had no idea of what it took to be a writer when I first became a member of TNBW. I have seen several members who joined before and after me improve by leaps and bounds. I believe the members of this group have a lot to offer one another.
44 2015-07-09 20:27:44
Re: Endurance Points (32 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I second the motion. John
45 2015-07-07 15:16:22
Re: AND THE WINNER IS… (16 replies, posted in Cop Shop)
Don, congratulations, I enjoyed your story and I am not surprised.
46 2015-07-07 14:17:21
Re: Link to Crazee Sharon's Lessons (4 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I looked at the writing tips. I remember reading a lot of them. I just reviewed crazeesharon's post on passive voice. It is the best treatment of the subject I have ever read. Sincerely, John
47 2015-07-06 13:26:27
Re: style for internal dialogue, italics or not (4 replies, posted in Writing Tips & Site Help)
I read the Editor's Blog on internal dialogue. It was clear and informative. Thank, John
48 2015-07-05 22:39:18
Re: Warrants (5 replies, posted in Cop Shop)
I talked to a local judge (retired) about warrants. He said I need more evidence than I have presented, at least for him to issue a warrant. He said people often give officers permission to search their property. (He didn't say it was a wise decision, just that it happens.) Hence, I will be changing several early chapters. I still plan on doing the search. I once knew a young woman who allowed officers to search her house and they found drugs her boy friend had stashed. She was arrested. The judge put her on probation, but she spent a couple of week in jail before the deal got worked out.
49 2015-07-02 03:18:08
Re: Hunter (1 replies, posted in Cop Shop)
Looking forward to the all new Hunter.
50 2015-06-30 21:42:33
Re: Warrants (5 replies, posted in Cop Shop)
I may have to work on that. I accessed 'Case Law 4 Cops' It appears that the base line rule established in 1933 was that "A magistrate may not properly issue a warrant to search a private dwelling unless he can find probable cause therefore from facts or circumstances presented to him under oath or affirmation. Mere affirmance of belief or suspicion is not enough."
So the question becomes what facts or circumstances are needed to constitute probable cause?
It would seem that we are deal with several different kinds of evidence. Three broad categories that come to mind are:
(1)Eye witness statements;(2)Physical evidence e.g. a gun, knife, club, or marked money, etc. (3) forensic evidence, fingerprints, blood, DNA, shoe-prints, tire tread marks, hair, etc.
There are two other classes of evidence: Circumstantial and Direct. Popular wisdom definitions are as follows.
Circumstantial evidence is evidence that relies on an inference to connect it to a crime--like finding a finger print at the scene of the crime.
Direct evidence would be an eye witness account of some one who actually saw the crime committed.
I'm not sure about video recordings of a crime, they often presented as if they are direct evidence.
If a witness claim to see a person close to the scene of a crime this might be considered as circumstantial evidence.
Hence, my question is, if I want to get a search warrant, what kind, how much evidence do I need for probable cause?