Titles in The Pendragon and The Beast of Caer Baddan (Page 8 of 9)

I'm somewhere in the middle. Whether it is grammar or spelling it doesn't matter, my point is to not to overdo it to the point that it is grating or become the focus (because the reader is more trying to figure out what is being said than reading). Basically, anything will be okay, but keep it subtle.

Also, just mentioning she has an accent is also okay. It's tricky though to keep reminding readers of her accent though without also becoming overbearing. But it's also an option in addition to using different grammar or spelling.

At the end of the day, this is what makes writing so hard sometimes - there's a million different ways to do something and choosing the best way isn't all that straightforward. For me, I'm always double-guessing whether I'm doing the right thing and wondering whether X instead of Y won't work better. Both works, but I guess this is where some books become award winners and receive widespread acclaim and others don't. I try not to stress too much about it as I just want my stories to be read. It's not so much about awards and acclaim. Others' mileage may vary.

All that said, what you've been doing so far works for me Rebecca. You already have a very distinct (historical) voice. I don't think it can be improved because it's already that good. But don't let me limit you. I have a lot of confidence in your ability to make anything work (even better despite what I think)!

Thanks, Amy!

I wish more people felt I got the facts right! I would spend a lot less time on the internet! Haha!

I'm sad now: "To make matters worse, his mother was a slaze." was actually my favorite line in the whole chapter! (Maybe because she is sympathizing with the potential struggles of her unborn child by looking at the problem threw that child's eyes.) But it seems I am alone in that like. Sigh. I'm changing it.

I think I'll have to go more with the mentioning an accent thing and less with writing it out. I don't want readers thinking Queen Muiredach is stupid or get frustrated trying to understand what she is saying. And I'm now concerned that I will make errors that no one can correct because they aren't sure what I am trying to say.

You might try making the grammar a little simpler or more naive.  'To make matters worse' is the phrasing of a native speaker.  A small tweak might suggest less facility with the language without spoiling the sentence for author or reader.

Simplify the grammar logic.  Stay with the English of the reader, but be a little clumsy with it.  'It is worse, that his mother was a slave', or 'What is worse, that his mother was a slave.'  If you can mirror the Pictish grammar it will be a bonus, but few readers will know you've done that--or not.

I agree with Amy here. And with you too - if I read this in dialogue, I won't correct it, because I'd assume you know what you want to do with it.

And also, I have never doubted the authenticity of your writing. It's clear as daylight that you have done tons of research! Combined with your 'voice', it's a masterpiece. There, I said it. It is.

I've decided to change names for both Drech and Orson. Drech has to go because people will say "Dreck" which is gross, and "Orson has to go because it is really way too modern for the time period

For Drech, I was thinking:
Draig
or
Draich

For Orson, I was thinking:
Orsus
or
Orsius

Thoughts?

Dryden?

Haven't you already published some of your books?

I also prefer Draich (which I would mentally pronounce like Drake)

Orsius...dunno. I see it and mentally switch the letters into Osirus for familiarity and ease of remembering.

Looks like another variation of "Tristan"
No?

Then I vote for Draich and Orsius.  (I take it the latter name is to be of Latin origin?)