Hi Elisheva. The powers of these books transcend all of our understanding of possible. That's my way of saying, I forgot how I positioned the book before. It should be better now. Norm, I'll start on your book either tomorrow or Thursday (My courses are draining me.)
1 2016-09-26 22:27:56
Re: The Naked Forest - Akhere I. (10 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
2 2016-09-26 07:33:59
Re: The Naked Forest - Akhere I. (10 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
It doesn't. Often I go back to an old review to find the comments have multiplied like bacteria. I'll go check out your comments. Is there anything you want me to do in return?
3 2016-09-25 11:27:45
Re: The Naked Forest - Akhere I. (10 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Don't worry. I'm premium.
4 2016-09-25 09:03:34
Re: First Person Multiple Narrative Young Adult Book Anyone? (32 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I'll get the whole novel out first before I put it in 1st person. Also, I may cut the mystery character scene since I can relay the information without them. I think I'll stick to past tense since I'm use to it and I'll try and get into the energy field of Kate. Maybe I'll have to dress up and put on Kate whiskers when I write next time.
5 2016-09-24 20:03:22
Re: First Person Multiple Narrative Young Adult Book Anyone? (32 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
I'll keep it to two but I'll see how the chapter from the mystery person's point of view goes. If too many people think it doesn't work, I'll cut it
6 2016-09-24 19:36:08
Re: Roll call (Originally Role Call) (42 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Akhere wrote:
Who are the rest of you who don't pipe up in here? I need new cannon fodder. List:
a) Akhere I./ The Naked Forest (Don't laugh but I had to search up wip. )
b) Young Adult (Which is my favourite genre for writing in, reading, being a targeted for)
c) Icarus Evans. Icarus is more of a dreamer than a planner. Unlike his beloved big brother, he lives for the now. Especially when there's cake involved. (I had to search up the latin term too. I feel so lost)Also, Hiya Janet!
7 2016-09-24 19:26:44
Topic: The Naked Forest - Akhere I. (10 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)
Greetings, my name is Akhere. I was wondering if anyone wants to brainstorm idea about my book, the Naked Forest. It's a young Adult fantasy about a group of kids who practise forbidden magic in the woods of a tiny town. If anyone's interested, you can help me by giving feedback on the first chapter (Specifically on whether anything doesn't make sense or if it looks like I'm head hopping.)
Thanks in advance.
Akhere out
8 2016-09-24 19:18:44
Re: First Person Multiple Narrative Young Adult Book Anyone? (32 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Thanks for the advice everyone. If I were to do it now, I'd have the first six chapters from Icarus' POV and the next two from Kate's. Then one from Icarus' followed by two from Kate's and from then it's pretty much every other chapter. (So yeah, I may need to restructure that!).
Thanks for the compliment Rhiannon. The narrative isn't too bad but I've been told that some points seem like it's head hopping so I think First person is the way to go. It'll make expressing the character's thoughts more natural.
I definitely have to check out the medieval fantasy/magic group, D'plume. I think brainstorming with new minds will be a great way of getting new ideas and getting a feel of where my novel should go.
Don, if I alternate the main two MC POVs well, can I have one chapter from a side character? It's mostly so we can see the MC from the rest of the town's eyes and to introduce another problem the MC can't know about. Also, is present mandatory? My story is in past so converting it to present would get me all... tense *Ba boom tiss*
9 2016-09-24 16:27:51
Topic: First Person Multiple Narrative Young Adult Book Anyone? (32 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Hi there, I was considering changing my book, the Naked Forest, so that it's in the first person. However, there are two narratives so I wanted to see if anyone else wrote a story like this and what everyone's thoughts on the matter were.
Currently, the book is in the third person and is kind of third limited but also a bit omniscient. I want to know what the best way to structure my book would be so any insight would be helpful.
10 2016-09-24 16:16:38
Re: Ran across this today (7 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
That usually does it.
11 2016-09-14 20:46:59
Re: Say the first word that comes to mind... (1,634 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Gum. Also, sputtering is such a nice sounding word. Just say it - sputtering. Sputtering
12 2016-08-16 20:49:05
Re: Introduce yourself (4 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Young Adult)
There's a forum in the Close Friends group but that hasn't been used in awhile. Why don't you send me messages or I'll try and create a post if you want.
13 2016-08-08 09:34:27
Topic: Introduce yourself (4 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Young Adult)
How's it going future authors? My name is Akhere, a sixteen-year-old Londoner currently writing his first book. I thought it'd be great if we all introduced ourselves, become closer as a community, review my book -- I mean, give each other feedback. I write young adult fantasy books (more like a book, but I'm getting there!) and love writing conversations and awkward experiences I've had with my friends (they don't love it as much. Or at all, really).
London is a busy, diverse area and I try to reflect that in my books. People of all races, genders, religion, sexualities, etc... should be represented in writing. Also, the awkward moments of life should be there. The silences, the stares, the sweaty palms and all. It's relatable and could be funny. But that's just my opinion.
I hope people keep introducing themselves and to hear from everyone here too. Just say hi if you don't want to post an essay about yourself.
Sincerely, Akhere
14 2016-07-09 19:59:10
Re: Question for the community: Male writers writing F/F books (31 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Yeah, I'd read it. A good book is a good book.
15 2016-07-06 15:08:30
Re: Our bios (6 replies, posted in Close friends)
How's it going, guys? I'm Akhere, a sixteen-year-old born and bred in London (Who is feeling like the baby of the group.) I started writing in 2015 around fall and I have finished my first book now! Although editing is taking long, hopefully, it will be out by the end of 2016.
My parents are Nigerian. I have four siblings, including a twin sister, and I'm trying to learn French and Spanish. (Mais, c'est un peu difficle car Je n'ai pas d'amis pour parler : ( )
I'm going to six form this year (year 12 in Uk and grade 11 in the states) and I'm terrified. Although I'm a huge nerd who started studying three months from the exams instead of going out and socialising like most kinds my age, the school board's messed up the education system so I have to do two years of learning in a couple of tests at the end of the two years. I could rant about this for an hour so I'll stop now.
I'm excited to join this group and share ideas and all. I never had such good feedback as I've got here since my friends are care about the few bad lines. (They're still laughing about when I wrote, "Cougar (a charcter's cat) looked like a cougar". That was two months ago... )
But yeah, I'm glad to be in a group of dedicated writers. As you've probably noticed, my grammar ain't all the good. I try write good but some words make the life of mine difficult, you get me?
Anyway, that's me *Blares That's So Raven theme tune*
16 2016-07-03 23:17:19
Re: Say the first word that comes to mind... (1,634 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)
Wendy does snow
17 2016-07-01 19:31:27
Re: Reviewing (5 replies, posted in Young Adult Writers)
Reynolds, I'd love to review your work. We can give feedback to each other and tips to improve. Please read my book, The Naked Forest as well. Hope to hear from you soon : )
18 2016-07-01 19:29:06
Re: My YA book finally published!! (7 replies, posted in Young Adult Writers)
Great to hear, Michelle! If you have anything else you're working on, I'd love to give feedback : )
19 2016-07-01 19:26:33
Topic: Review Squad (0 replies, posted in Young Adult Writers)
How's it going, my new group? I'd like to say high for the first time (to you guys, I'm not THAT antisocial... well, I am but that's not the point!). Also, let's review each other? I need feedback for the second draft of my book and you guys seem pretty cool so I thought I'd share it. Reply to me if you want some feedback and we can be writing buddies, literary knights! Pen wielders and internet intellectuals!
Hope to see from you soon. Sincerely, Akhere.
