26

(10 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

jack the knife wrote:

Unless you self-publish, only the publisher gets sales numbers from Amazon. Amazon rank is indicative of sales in a general way, but not specific. If your ranking climbs, you know that's because of a sales increase, but a rise of several thousand in rank may only translate to a couple of books sold. I don't think your idea is workable, Sol. And I don't really see the point, as it would create an irrelevant competition among TNBW published authors who write in various genres and use various promotion discounts.

I agree with the irrelevant competition aspect. When I do a promotion, my ranking will shoot up by tens of thousands. And then it quickly goes back down. And what would be tracked? The overall Amazon ranking? The genre specific? And which genre, since Amazon allows up to three? Us authors are keeping track of our sales based on the bottom line, royalty payments. No need for TNBW to do it.

27

(14 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Hi Sol,

Thanks again for doing this. Three of my recent pubs workshopped here are not on the list:
Ghost War
https://www.amazon.com/Ghost-War-Cries- … nav-subnav

Time's Last Gift (workshopped as Translate Slowly)
https://www.amazon.com/Times-Last-Gift- … amp;sr=1-5

and Requeim (workshopped as Resurrection Deux)

https://www.amazon.com/Requiem-Don-Cham … nav-subnav

28

(8 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

MrsPiddles wrote:

I need the name of a well known cartoon character - one that young children will know - that has spiky hair, like a hedge hog. I decided to write a picture book for my granddaughter, 4 y/o who grew her first sunflower this year. The bugger topped out at 9.5 feet tall and the center (where the seeds are) is almost a foot across! I'm using the photos my daughter in law has posted to Facebook. I'll make this book a Christmas present or something. This name will be something she says when she first discovers the new bud. A sunflower bud is really spiky, like our old hedge hog cartoon characters. I'm so far out of touch with what kids are watching these days I don't even know where to start!

Thanks tons

Sounds like Sonic the Hedgehog to me, from the old Sega games. Don't know if kids today will know him, but everyone who grew up in the 90s did.

29

(7 replies, posted in Texas Authors)

Just discovered this group. While I no longer live in Texas, I was born and raised there (Amarillo) and lived in Austin for 24 years before I moved to Florida. So I'll always be a Texan. Can't really think of any phrases off the top of my head, but all my non-Texas friends always comment when I use the phrase "all of" in the appropriate Texan way by running the words together and pronouncing it "olive."

And I only heard "diddly squat" never "piddly".

cheers,
Don

30

(5 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

rhiannon wrote:

I try to follow the John Campbell dicta, and write as though for an audience that exists at the time and place of the story.  It presents a challenge, as though the people of the time would know certain things, but the reader wouldn't, and you'd have to sneak in an explanation.  So let me see if I need more on the following.  There's a being in my story:  a vrocalaca.  I don't define them.  It is a word that can be looked up.  When a werewolf dies, through decapitation and disemboweling, they rise from the dead as a vrocalaca.  A vrocalaca has to wear all over clothing in the sun, or heavy sunscreen.  He drinks blood to live.  He can be skewered or impaled and not die, but being impaled through the heart does it. He is allergic to garlic. Can turn into a flying creature. So who has guessed what a vrocalaca is?  And does it matter if I don't explain it--wouldn't the properties I've mentioned by enough?

In your story, set on a world with these unique creatures that has been invaded by Terrans, the most obvious solution is to have a conversation with your main character and a Terran at some point early on where they ask what she means and she has to explain -- analogous to the Watson/Holmes exchange above.

However, in the version I've been reading, which starts in the middle of the action, this will be more difficult.

Hi Sol,

I like to mark certain stories/novels inactive once they've been published or if I don't want further reviews on them. On stories, when you go to the publish tab, there is an option to mark the story inactive at the top of the page. For novels, however, we have to make each chapter inactive. It works, but is a little tedious. Is there a way to add a button at the top (like on the short stories) to make the entire novel inactive with one selection?

I'm sure others might appreciate this as well.

Cheers,
Don

Hi Elisheva,

Just read the first chapter, and liked it a lot. It's beginning of a good story. As others have said, everyone has there own style. I like to have a beginning and end in mind when I start to write, and some conflict ideas along the way -- plus a good idea of the central characters. I sometimes write this down, but more often than not, mull it over in my mind.

Specific scenes, sub-plots, and secondary characters evolve as I write. And sometimes the ending changes completely as I write. But I always start with a general plot in mind: A leads to B, C does this, then D happens, etc.

Most important thing is to write it. If it's trapped in your brain, no one else can appreciate it.

Cheers,
Don

33

(16 replies, posted in Cop Shop)

Wow! Thanks, everyone. This contest was fun, and I really enjoyed reading everyone's take on the theme.

See ya in the next one.

Cheers,
Don

Much better. Those are amber eyes.

#2 is the best out of the ones as presented, but if you colored the eyes on the B&W one, I think I'd like that one a lot. I'd also touch up the eyes on the color one, if you choose that. The look more gray than amber to me. In the story, her eyes have a mesmerizing quality. I'd try to get that to come through on the cover.

And I liked Kenny's suggestion about the sunglasses.

Cheers,
Don

36

(9 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Congrats, Adrian.

This was a lot of fun. We should do it again sometime.

Cheers,
D

37

(6 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Keep the POV as you have - Apollo or Joseph. "God" is the voice they hear. Anything else is head-hopping and too confusing. If it's important to know what the other MC heard, write a chapter from their POV and focus on the internal conversation. It would be an interesting experiment, I think.

38

(25 replies, posted in Cop Shop)

I guess I'll try it both ways, then, and see which one I like better. Or I'll just enter both. smile

D

39

(25 replies, posted in Cop Shop)

Hey JP,

Just saw the "official" rules for the contest, and they don't mention the requirement for a "double-cross" just a "crime." Just wondered if the idea had changed. I wrote a story about a double-cross just for the contest, but wasn't entirely happy with it, because it was a little convoluted. But if I could modify it to just a crime, I think I'll do that.

Some guidance would be appreciated. And if you do want a "double-cross" you should talk to Sol about changing the rules page, or you might get some irritated writers.

Cheers,
Don

40

(3 replies, posted in Cop Shop)

The answer is - it depends. smile

I knew of a few places in Texas that had city marshals. They mainly handled court security, serving summons, and things like that. I just looked it up on wikipedia (so you know it's correct smile ) and it looks like a lot of states have the same situation, but some are also the equivalent of a police officer or sheriff's deputy. Others handle more civil and code issues in a municipality, while the police or sheriff handle criminal.

U.S. Marshal service is a lot like the local ones, only on a federal basis - handling court security, securing fugitives with warrants, etc.

Cheers,
Don

41

(3 replies, posted in Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi)

Thanks, Amy. I was meaning to join the group when Sol expanded the number we could be members of, but never got around to it. The contest gave me a little kick in the rear to get it done. smile

42

(9 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Hi Dirk,

I don't think you'll have a problem switching between characters within the same chapter, even though you've previously established a chapter-by chapter change. When things get exciting, and lots of things are happening, switching more often keeps the tension high. continuously ending one chapter with a dramatic ending, then starting the next - "meanwhile, back on Earth" - will reduce the tension as you reach the climax of the novel, I think.

Cheers,
Don

43

(1 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Revised chapters (starting with Chapter 16) are being posted. These are new, so if you've read before you can get credits for reading the new versions. I'd appreciate some reviews to see if I've addressed concerns.

And K, yes, I did try to write a Ghost Who Cries into a story without letting readers know from the beginning. Now, I try to sneak him in with only the illuminati suspecting. smile

44

(1 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Especially Norm d' Plume, Graymartin, Nathan Child's, allen, and mbledsoe. I've decided to drop the Ghost/Illsa sub-plot and make this a completely stand-alone novel (although there may be another familiar character who pops up, just not someone from the Ghost books.)

I've gone ahead and deleted chapters 16-22 and will be posting new versions in a week or so. I'll be making some slight changes to previous chapters (mainly changing the Spector character) but will update you in the author notes when I repost Chapter 16.

Most of you had concerns with the Ghost subplot; I had the same concerns myself, but writing it that way allowed me to move the plot forward and devise a way to end this without Ghost. Now I've figured that out, I've decided to play with that version and not continue with the Ghost-version.

That's why this site is so cool - it gives us the freedom to experiment like this.

Cheers,
Don

45

(5 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

This must be a glitch in the Matrix, because I wrote a regular review on "Founder's" yesterday, and got the full points. I also got points on another regular review today. Hopefully, Sol can sort this out, because that's frustrating.

Hi Dirk,

I'm coming into this discussion late, but I wanted to throw an idea out there. It might avoid writing an overly complicated rationale for why the shipping company is using slave labor versus machines.

What if they are selling the soil as some sort of "organic, untouched by machinery, virgin, etc" topsoil from Earth, and it sells at a premium? That would justify the use of humans. Of course, the company is using slaves instead of paid workers to increase their profit. People right now pay a premium for stuff like that (with a perceived purity to it, whether it's true or not). I'm sure that won't change in the future.

Cheers,
Don

47

(6 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

I'm with you, Amy. I've wanted to get my renewal out of the way so I don't forget. I hope Sol can either change this, or there's an email to remind us. The last think I want to do is have my membership lapse because I forgot what the end date of my trial was.

Cheers,
Don

48

(2 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

Janet Taylor-Perry wrote:

I hadn't noticed. I'll check next time.

It's been fixed now. I haven't noticed a problem since last week.

It's really hard to keep constant action/tension going in a novel without it becoming overly contrived IMO. You need lulls to make it realistic, set up scenes, and work on characterization. A screenplay for an hour and a half movie or 45 minute TV episode is entirely different, and that may be what your neighbor was thinking about since she's a screenwriter. If you look at a lot of movies and TV shows, many are non-stop action. And you know what? The seem a little contrived and cartoonish because of it.

Look at good TV show - Breaking Bad, Justified, True Detectives are some of my favorites. Lots of action, but also lots of lulls and "slow" parts.

Of course, uneven could also be that parts of the story were really tight, and parts just kind of rambled on with no apparent reason. That's not good, in either a novel or a movie. A lull or stop in the action should still move the plot forward, or develop the characters. No one wants to spend five minutes reading the description of a couch, no matter how well done it is.

Cheers,
Don

50

(2 replies, posted in TheNextBigWriter Premium)

jack the knife wrote:

Sol, I noticed that in the message board of the home page, there is no "In-line review replies" category. But there is "Regular review replies." So in order to see if an author I'd given an in-line review to had responded, I'd have to keep going back to that particular chapter to check - if I could remember which one it was! Can this be added as a category in that list? It would make life easier.

I'll second this request. One of the nice things with this site is being able to communicate back to reviewers about their comments, and as a reviewer, to see what the author thought of my comments. It really helps make stronger connections.