Dirk B. wrote:I'm almost afraid to ask another grammar question, lest I unleash another kerfuffle, but here goes. :-)
Can someone please tell me if the second sentence is considered grammatically correct? I prefer the way it reads, and I've seen it used by an experienced author with whom I trade reviews.
Alessandro never liked Connor, considering him too pious to be his friend.
Alessandro never liked Connor, considered him too pious to be his friend.
Or do I need to use a period instead of the comma?
Thanks
Dirk
I use a structure like this purposely sometimes, and I know other writers whose style/voice is suitable for this kind of structure. I’m familiar with your work, and the second would stand out as unusual to your style/voice in my opinion.
A period alone isn’t much of a solution. Grammar-wise, you’re missing the subject (though the flexible among us (like me) would argue it’s “implied”). Chuck’s suggestion is fine. However, I think the pause implied by the comma is meaningful. I see three other options (in addition to Chuck’s)—depending on how long you want the pause. [Also, the end of it sounds a little wonky to me, as with three pronouns in short order (“him,” “his,” and the implied “he” preceding the second clause), assigning the antecedents gets a little stumbly. I’d lose one of the pronouns to make it clearer]:
Alessandro never liked Connor—considered him too pious (to have as friend).
Alessandro never liked Connor. He considered him too pious (to have as friend).
Alessandro never liked Connor; he considered him too pious (to have as friend).
THAT SAID: If it were me. I would put a period after “pious” and end it there. That’s a punchier sentence, and I think the friend bit is implied. In fact, some writers (like me), might be tempted to make it even more terse (though this might not fit your style):
Alessandro never liked Connor—too pious.
