1 Topic by max keanu (edited by max keanu 2016-06-25 22:50:45)

Topic: Don't try this at home...

In many places in the Northwest (where I now live) there are freezing temperatures for much of the year. I was wondering if a murderer, to hide the evidence of a corpse, could use a log-splitter on a FROZEN corpse whereby slicing up body parts to make for easier disposal. Or would the corpse just compress and burst?

I was thinking the splitter's iron blade could be heated to a high temperature until it cut through a FROZEN corpse like a knife through butter... Would that work?

This is a video of a kinetic log-splitter that can slice and dice up to three-foot sections quickly (I wonder if this is my noisy lumberjack neighbor down the street?)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4m7FrnudhE

The log-splitting starts about halfway into the video, at 520.... Say what? Gary Gilmore, who was he? Egad, lol? I thought he was executed!

Quote Post 1

Re: Don't try this at home...

You could try it on deep-frozen butcher carcasses.

Quote Post 2

Re: Don't try this at home...

njc wrote:

You could try it on deep-frozen butcher carcasses.

THinking about this I think it is all about the direction of the grain... hey, I'm no woodsman, but I'm learning.

Quote Post 3

Re: Don't try this at home...

Some Golden-age writer, perhaps Futrelle, gave us a murder in which the corpse was deep-frozen in liquid CO2 and pulverized in that state.  What was left could easily be washed down the sewers, and with no DNA testing available, there was no proof he'd ever been there.

Quote Post 4

Re: Don't try this at home...

njc wrote:

Some Golden-age writer, perhaps Futrelle, gave us a murder in which the corpse was deep-frozen in liquid CO2 and pulverized in that state.  What was left could easily be washed down the sewers, and with no DNA testing available, there was no proof he'd ever been there.


I'm discovering that vermin, birds, squirrels, coyotes etc., in my stretch of forest will consume everything if it is their specific bite-sized morsel.

Quote Post 5

Re: Don't try this at home...

max keanu wrote:
njc wrote:

Some Golden-age writer, perhaps Futrelle, gave us a murder in which the corpse was deep-frozen in liquid CO2 and pulverized in that state.  What was left could easily be washed down the sewers, and with no DNA testing available, there was no proof he'd ever been there.


I'm discovering that vermin, birds, squirrels, coyotes etc., in my stretch of forest will consume everything if it is their specific bite-sized morsel.

Save yourself the trouble of all that butchering and just keep a well stocked pig pen; pigs will eat the body, bones and all -- perhaps a new slant on going to the pigs. Take care. Vern

Quote Post 6

Re: Don't try this at home...

Why go to all that trouble. There will be too much DNA evidence in the "fall off." With Snoqualmie Pass in the winter, the body can be disposed of without all the gore. Or, Lake Washington serves as a lovely resting place. A paint bucket filled with cement, a length of chain and the body will remain beneath the 55 degree waters for longer than the murderer will live. I was going to suggest trying the lumber splitter on a spare wife to test it, but that would be the Alfred Hitchcock in me speaking.

Quote Post 7

8 Reply by vern (edited by vern 2016-06-26 13:24:32)

Re: Don't try this at home...

Simon Morris wrote:

Why go to all that trouble. There will be too much DNA evidence in the "fall off." With Snoqualmie Pass in the winter, the body can be disposed of without all the gore. Or, Lake Washington serves as a lovely resting place. A paint bucket filled with cement, a length of chain and the body will remain beneath the 55 degree waters for longer than the murderer will live. I was going to suggest trying the lumber splitter on a spare wife to test it, but that would be the Alfred Hitchcock in me speaking.

I don't know, sounds like a lot of work getting to those places and carrying all that cement and all. And if somebody is going to leisurely sift through all that "stuff" for DNA, they've probably already sniffed out more than enough evidence to convict. BTW, Lake Washington and probably most any other is at times chock full of scuba divers looking for treasures or artifacts, prone to find that body sticking up like a Lady in the Lake (think movie with Robert Montgomery)before the murderer's demise. Take care. Vern

Edited to add R. Montgomery info)

Quote Post 8

Re: Don't try this at home...

Simon Morris wrote:

Why go to all that trouble. There will be too much DNA evidence in the "fall off." With Snoqualmie Pass in the winter, the body can be disposed of without all the gore. Or, Lake Washington serves as a lovely resting place. A paint bucket filled with cement, a length of chain and the body will remain beneath the 55 degree waters for longer than the murderer will live. I was going to suggest trying the lumber splitter on a spare wife to test it, but that would be the Alfred Hitchcock in me speaking.


I have so much to see in Washington State. So far I've seen about 1%, the drive from Seattle to Gig Harbor, once to Port Orchard... big state! Lots of places to dump a body. But I have a maniac serial killer in me who want me to write him up and tell his tale (fiction of course!). It's been a rough year for me. This maniac is the type to collect and store bodies under the house, in the shed, in the freezer... I'm using the Green River killer as my template. BTW- I met Hitchcock back in the 1970s. Odd little man.

Quote Post 9