Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi → Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread
Not sure about ending HFN. That's no hook.
And I fear that ending shortly after the duel will mean that you'll need two subsequent books--and that you'll give no hint of the story's other dimensions. Maybe get through Kha's return and Zyrtec's (Zirdech's?) quarters, and get to the warning of present necromancy.
Critical question: Are you writing a series of separate adventures, or a single (multipart?) story in multiple volumes?
My goal is to write separate adventures that buildinto a multipart story through multiple volumes. In the beginning, I don't think you were aware of the scope of my plot, but it built until that became apparent. If I'm going to see this to a publisher, it has to start with one book. At least that's my thoughts on the matter so far.
If you have the whole set written, even if the latter ones are incomplete, why not present the whole work? At the very least, that will cue the cover designer/artist to find design elements to link the series. (I've been reading all those links of the Mad Genius Club articles.) See http://covercritics.com/ .
My thought is that the thread beginning with Acts is the core of the story, and the others can be released as side threads. Not add-ons, like the 'Shadow' books of the Enderverse, but 'The Rest of the Story', released after (or with) the second book of the Anver sequence (whether or not it's the last volume in that story). Or, if there are three, you can release them A1, Mandates, A2, Dictates, A3.
A1, Mandates, A2, Dictates, A3
Picturing Acts spread out this way makes my head hurt. I have a hard enough time trying to figure out the timeline of this world as is. Why not do a series of Acts stories bundled into one book? And I agree with njc; lose the HFN ending to part 1. It's ok to do HFN if you bundle the stories in one book, but even then, give us a hook to keep going.
Also, since there is some overlap between the story timelines, you really need to be clear when covering the same events from a different character's perspective. I got lost in Mandates for a while because I couldn't pin down where those events overlapped with Acts (e.g., Anver at Earthwound). It amazes me that you can keep all that straight. I bow low, My Queen.
I believe Amy's point is that it will be too long to be a single book. My view is that Anver's storyline is the strongest, and my impression is that all the storylines will merge into his.
Mandates is about Kha and Airen, and lies within the time period of A1. If Amy will only take my advice and start Mandates with a short prologue of Kha writing the note to Anver and leaving, the reader who picks it up after A1 will have an immediate connection. Mandates will explain Sil, who appears in A1 and becomes a force in A2. A2 will reference, if not involve, the priests of Behira, and Dictates will provide an explanation for the Gillis as well as explanations that will be needed early in A3. It dovetails beautifully ... depending on how A1, A2, and A3 are broken up.
Now if only my stuff would fall together so cleanly. 
Children, high stress job, 4 (5?) books in progress at once, and she still found time to review bomb me. Now in I'm down to just one straggler among my regular readers. So far, my to-do list doesn't allow me to resume writing for probably another month.
Made a simple phone call today to update Canada Pension Plan about my new address. Turns out, my social insurance number was flagged as dormant even though the morons have been depositing payments into my checking account for five years. Naturally, I now have to go somewhere "physical" to prove to them that I'm still alive and in Canada. They don't do it online. So a change of address becomes a two hour event, assuming there isn't a whole room packed with Canadian sheep in line in front of me.
Add to that a multi-week event changing my address with U.S. Social Security. Called a bureaucrat, proved who I was, only to be told that changing my address over the phone would lead to a termination of benefits. WTF? So I paid $100 roundtrip cab care to the U.S. Consulate only to be told they don't handle Social Security services in Calgary. Dumbass suggested I travel to the U.S. and visit a Social Security office in person. Having heard that I might lose my benefits, I started researching online, only to find out there is no clear answer. So I shelled out $300 for a phone consultation with a lawyer who was nice enough to tell me I didn't need her services. She referred me to an expert site and gave me a refund. The expert site didn't respond for over two weeks and several attempts, so I went back to the lawyer. She did a bunch of research to my questions and came up with "you're probably ok." A day later, the expert site responded with the same information. This dragged on for six weeks and $400 just to make an address change. I can't wait to file form 8022 with the IRS to give them my new address, too.
I won't even discuss the saga of my 8-month-old awesome Epson printer starting to blur the output. I'll save that saga until I know how it ends.
Nite all.
I agree that Acts is the strongest. You've convinced me of that. I liken it to Anne McCaffery's Dragonsinger and Dragonsong. The story starts much earlier (with Dragonriders of Pern) but the Dragonsinger thread is independent and stands alone.
And Acts is too long to be in one book. If I don't eliminate anything, the story is about 150,000 words. While I can thin it and pare stuff down, it is a monster. For an attempt at trying to get a publisher, I need to have a story about 75K to 90K. If I break the story into 2 parts, I've got enough extra wordage to elaborate and add missing material. (Book 1 - Andalaya's duel, more Alina evilness, and more info about the Guildhouse.) (Book 2 - A strong hook to the necromancer thread, more bad guy evilness instead of being invisible, and a HFN ending that leaves Anver/Kat in a good place.)
And to bow to NJC, I'm going to write a prologue where Kha leaves Anver the note. I may not mention Anver by name...he has no place in Mandates and won't be mentioned again. However, I'm going to be rewriting Mandates next because Norm is reviewing it and I'm going to finish the last couple chapters for him.
(I got bowed to? You made my day, Norm. Did I ever tell you my goal and why I want to be a writer? 1) to write 2) to perch at the top of the geek heirarchy with a frigging tiara on my head. Queen Amy! Whoopee!)
You're worth review-bombing, Norm. I've been neglecting everyone during the ear-infection fiasco. It was time that I got on the plus-side of my reviews for a change.
Man, you are near Calgary, Janet is in WA state. I need to arrange a meet. I have a goal. Within a year? Work has to thin out so that I can take time off, but that is on my goal list. I wanna drink some Aussie wine and laugh a lot.
And to bow to NJC, I'm going to write a prologue where Kha leaves Anver the note. I may not mention Anver by name...he has no place in Mandates and won't be mentioned again.
But he is the link back so that if someone reads picks Mandates up off the shelves first and reads it, then goes back to A1, he'll recognize Anver at the start. I wouldn't mind if Anver got mentioned a few times in Kha's thinking, either. Anver represents home, and the problems and responsibilities to which Kha knows he must return.
... to bow and to bend we shan't be ashamed ...
You're too cool for Queen Amy. There is no equal to the impact of Dr. Ess on the human race. The rise of the Julii will incorporate one of my best friends (and a darn good futurist) as Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus. The Professor invented interstellar travel (and maybe time travel) all while snorting bookworm spoor. And Lady Kay will have a recurring role as Caligula's highly inappropriate mother. Kay will also play a secret part in the story involving a lot of dead bodies (naturally).
I can't wait to write Caligula's chapter! Big surprise coming.
If you arrange the meet in the fall, I might be able to find a way to join you. (You'll be disappointed.) I'd probably make the trip by way of Pheonix. The world's largest theater organ is no longer the Radio City Wurlitzer. The world's largest pipe organ is in a pizzeria in Mesa, Arizona. The traps are in the restaurant space itself.
The Professor invented interstellar travel (and maybe time travel) all while snorting bookworm spoor.
Don't underestimate yourself, New Jersey. I see you as an ornery man who likes to try and reform stupid people, so I won't be disappointed :-) I see Janet as a person who recharges her mental energy by being alone (or with family), so I don't plan on hanging around for more than an evening. Maybe two. I'm a big girl, so I can amuse myself and maybe use the time to get extra sleep and write a bit. I see Norm and figure he's a pensioner with a young-man's soul who started writing because it makes him laugh. I'd imagine that he likes to laugh a lot.
I see K as a being a guy who likes to bend the rules. At least he did before he was 18 and could be prosecuted :-)
So who plays the organ at the pizza place? Do they have a concert in the evening?
You said, "But he is the link back so that if someone reads picks Mandates up off the shelves first and reads it, then goes back to A1, he'll recognize Anver at the start. I wouldn't mind if Anver got mentioned a few times in Kha's thinking, either. Anver represents home, and the problems and responsibilities to which Kha knows he must return."
Anver's book actually started because I wrote him into Mandates. He would give the lecture to the students and teach about magic while Kha dealt with the consequences of the magic. Then I split him into his own story and the rest is history. I'll consider mentioning more of Anver, but anyone reading the series will know the letter is to Anver and that Kha is referring to him.
Kha's main emotion re Anver is guilt. Anver got screwed by the situation and has carried the load for Kha without reward. Anver only held rank for a few months before Kha got injured. Kha didn't really know him well. To refer to Anver as home isn't accurate. Anver is more like a person who throws themselves on a landmine and saves the day. Kha gets a major inferiority complex at that kind of dedication. It only gets worse as Anver is forged as a leader and stands up to Kha's attempts to be a parent.
So who plays the organ at the pizza place? Do they have a concert in the evening?
You said, "But he is the link back so that if someone reads picks Mandates up off the shelves first and reads it, then goes back to A1, he'll recognize Anver at the start. ... Anver represents home, and the problems and responsibilities to which Kha knows he must return."
Anver's book actually started because I wrote him into Mandates. He would give the lecture to the students and teach about magic while Kha dealt with the consequences of the magic. Then I split him into his own story and the rest is history. I'll consider mentioning more of Anver, but anyone reading the series will know the letter is to Anver and that Kha is referring to him.
If they are reading in order. But what if they pick up Mandates first because the cover grabs them?
Kha's main emotion re Anver is guilt. Anver got screwed by the situation and has carried the load for Kha without reward. Anver only held rank for a few months before Kha got injured. Kha didn't really know him well. To refer to Anver as home isn't accurate. Anver is more like a person who throws themselves on a landmine and saves the day. Kha gets a major inferiority complex at that kind of dedication. It only gets worse as Anver is forged as a leader and stands up to Kha's attempts to be a parent.
Is the school home them? Or, after all his years in the Guildhouse, is that still a foreign an idea to him?
Man, you are near Calgary, Janet is in WA state. I need to arrange a meet. I have a goal. Within a year? Work has to thin out so that I can take time off, but that is on my goal list. I wanna drink some Aussie wine and laugh a lot.
If you ever find yourself in WA, I'd be happy to buy you coffee after your night of wine. 
-Elisheva
Old post:
Dirk: The terminology is, "There is a strong family history of psychosis, personality disorders, and sociopaths. None of it was ever diagnosed, but behavior doesn't lie. Emperor #1, cut off his own toes with a bolt cutter. Emperor #2 believed he was king of Rome and instated the Roman culture/ rules that we follow today. Emperor #3 was known to go into prolonged, 'fugues' where he stared into space and held the same position for days on end."
In case I forgot to mention it, don't forget (H)Eliogabolus, Rome's drag queen emperor, who demanded that the Senate call him 'Empress'. In Elegiacs.
Mandates is the "companion novel" to Acts (I). Dictates is the "companion novel" to Acts(II). Acts(3) stands alone.
In case I forgot to mention it, don't forget (H)Eliogabolus, Rome's drag queen emperor, who demanded that the Senate call him 'Empress'. In Elegiacs.
The lead plumbing hard at work.
Elisheva,
There are too many people clumped in one place for it to be a coincidence. You are absolutely invited when(not if) we get together!
For Kha, the guild house is a refuge and place where he can teach, refresh, and recharge. Home is wherever the Wolves are.
I just saw a documentary about the national park in Banff. Holy...moly...that place could be a movie set for my book. The Rocky Mountains in the distance, the flat plains in between the high-rising mountains, the meadows at the top of the skil lift, and the river running through and cutting the valleys in half....that place is PERFECT.
Then they talked about another national park north of Banff, where the foundation is limestone and caves have eroded into river channels so the rivers disappear and run underground. The Indians used to call the area magic, because water would flow out from underneath rocks without any sign of flow uphill.
Yup. Perfect. Mix that with the new cave system they found in Vietnam, and the little gullies and ravines of a local place called Hocking Hills (southern Ohio), and the set is complete. All I need to do is find a medieval town and I'm good to go!
I just saw a documentary about the national park in Banff. Holy...moly...that place could be a movie set for my book. The Rocky Mountains in the distance, the flat plains in between the high-rising mountains, the meadows at the top of the skil lift, and the river running through and cutting the valleys in half....that place is PERFECT.
I believe you're referring to the view out my window. I can't afford Banff, so I have to settle for southeast Calgary and a telescope.
No. Bears.
The government decided bears should be allowed more rights than tax payers. As a result, there's more bears. And they invite themselves to dinner.
Goodness, you're alive!
Fantasy/Magic & Sci-Fi → Acts/ Dictates/ Mandates/ Mantle - Amy's Thread
