I Cannot Breathe

I Cannot Breathe

I cannot breathe.

All the screaming inside of me,

of all the emotions trying to break free,

even as you hold me down.

I cannot breathe.

Words can hurt, but yours can kill.

I’ve given everything that I could,

and you make sure that I know it’s not enough,

that I will never be just good enough.

I cannot breathe.

I’m drowning in the life I bound myself to,

and all you see is how I’m letting you down.

You promised to love me for me,

and it’s me you cannot seem to stand.

I cannot breathe!

Don’t you understand that the things you hate about me

are the things you promised to love most?

How can you look at me,

how can you tell me you love me,

then tell me that I fail in everything I do?

I cannot breathe.

I cannot breathe.

If I cry for help,

will you only tell me how weak I am?

It’ll only be another chink in my armor, I know

Only another thing for you to laugh at.

I give up.

I cannot breathe.

Am I broken?

How many people have to tell me

that I am no longer recognizable,

before it finally sinks in?

What do you see, I wonder, when you look at me?

Do you see the girl you swore you’d love forever?

Or do you see the one who’s only let you down,

by not always putting you first?

I cannot breathe.

I didn’t mean to let you down.

I didn’t mean to disappoint.

I did try.  I promise

I cannot breathe.

© Copyright 2006 Jennifer McConnell

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