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Life with a perfect grapefruit hanging over my head.

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In my Southern Gothic mystery, Legacy of Lies, Theodosia “Dosia” Epperson Hardee is hell bent on bequeathing her ancestral estate on Florida's Suwannee River to her equally stubborn granddaughter, Sunflower. But when Sunflower stumbles across her philandering grandfather’s bones in one of Dosia’s limerock pits, his skull crushed by a railroad spike, murder is added to the legacy. Dosia’s hippie daughter, Lily, has long blamed Dosia for her father's leaving. Now she vacillates between blaming her for his murder and wanting to clear her. Sunflower is torn between the leftist politics in which she has been raised and the growing appeal of land and power. The sheriff, who owes his office to Dosia's financial and political support, is torn between loyalty to his life-long friend and evidence pointing to her guilt. 
For decades, Dosia has shielded herself from the humiliation of her husband’s betrayal by hiding behind the Epperson family crest. Now she must decide—either face up to the emerging truths behind the deaths, truths she’s sure will bring dishonor on the family, or sabotage the investigation and lose her granddaughter’s growing respect. Either way, if the case isn’t concluded quickly, she risks losing Epperson Landing. The novel is complete at 122,000 words. I am looking for a "big picture" critique--arc, pacing, character development.

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Aspiring playwright Larry Lubowski lives in a fusty apartment above a sex shop. After losing Ellinore's prestigious writing contest to his friend and love interest, Ida Plummer, Larry becomes disenchanted with his life. The hamlet of Ellinore is known around the world for its annual Shakespearean Summer Fest and playwright competition. Claude Coquin is the mayor, and the Lord Chamberlain of the theatre guild. Claude is romantically involved with Helen Lubowski, Larry's mother. Trouble starts for Larry when a dredging operation pulls his missing father's car from the river with a trunk load of heroine. Our antihero begins his quixotic slip from reality, and plots to avenge his father's murder. Meanwhile, Ida prepares to rehearse her award-winning play on the stage of the Piccadilly Theatre. It's comedic chaos when the enchanted characters of Ida's play become involved in Larry's real-world tragedy. As the final curtain gets set to fall, we learn everything was not as it seemed TO BE.

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A soldier's story

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When a mesmerising young time-traveller gives sixteen-year-old Phoebe a copy of Romeo and Juliet, stolen from William Shakespeare himself, she is dragged through time into the violence and passion of Elizabethan London, where she must fight to save her world and the one she loves. This is the first book in a young adult fantasy series about Phoebe's journey through history, as she gets caught up in the wars of the powerful and ancient Wanderers.

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unsettling

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This is the first three chapter. Any feedback welcome. I started writing this as a work shop assignment- emulate one of your favorite authors. I chose Palahniuk.

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Young adult fantasy. This is the first of a series of books which will span Chloe’s years of training. She has been selected as a trainee to the Preases who are a group of powerful beings. They each possess an orb that grants them specific powers which they use to defend the earth’s dimensions. The inhabitants are humans mixed with other beings from each of earth’s dimensions. During her first year of training, her best friend is kidnapped and she sets out to rescue her. This is the first in a series of books. The death of her predecessor and the discovering who killed him is the back story that doesn't get resolved until the last book- but each book will provide a small piece of the puzzle. I would like to know if the story is interesting and any creative title ideas (I am at a loss for a good one). I would appreciate feedback any other comments that come to mind. I look forward to all constructive criticism! Thank you to everyone who took time to read this.

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Five hundred years from now… Sixteen year old Talon and her crew were created as part of a genetic experiment; each member of The Pack has the ability to morph into a specific animal. Subject to cruel emotional and physical experiments, Talon sprang her crew from the lab. Now, the kids work as thieves for hire for anyone on the continent who pays. Pulled apart by war, the United States is a distant memory and the continent of North America is divided into 63 countries. But the tensions between countries are building, and the abduction of a president’s children could draw the continent into war. Talon and her Pack are hired in a last ditch attempt to rescue the kids and prevent an all-out war. But the job may be more than Talon bargained for, as their biggest secret, their ability to morph, could be revealed to the very people Talon is trying to hide from.

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Professor Randall Hartwig has dedicated his life to Biblical Archeology. Though he teaches at Southern Methodist University he has spent years of research looking for the existence of a prenoachian civilization as proof that Eden exists. However, his dedication leads to a discovery that unleashes hell on earth as evil spirits are released from several skeletal remains that were believed to be that of ancient Nephilum (giants born of both Angels and the daughters of man); Genesis chapter six.

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This will be a novella designed as a prequel to my series. My goal is to introduce the world and induce readers to fall in love with Tremeirchson and its flying horses.

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Frying the old bacon on my beach chair.

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A zombie western based on THE THREE GODFATHERS movie. Here is how it really looks as a script in html: http://www.tradewindsweb.com/ZOMB/3_zombies.html The short story is on site, but not revised to reflect this script... yet. BOLD TYPE - SCENE HEADER ITALICS - ACTION V.O. means voice over (yes, I over did these) O.S. means spoken off screen

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Stephen, a young discarnate soul, unwillingly incarnates on the earthly plane to help a woman in an abusive relationship; soon, he falls in love with her, and when framed for Lilah's murder, he must decide if life is worth living without her.

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An unsuspecting bus load of humans are caught up in the middle of a war for the cosmos. They just want to get to San Francisco.

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Melanie Reyser is finally ready to confess her true feelings to her best friend, Aaron Price. When a new student suddenly shows up, capturing Aaron's immediate attention, Melanie is crushed. Savannah Dalton is amazingly beautiful and friendly and appears to have it all. But is she hiding something? Savannah will soon introduce both Melanie and Aaron to a twisted world that they never knew existed. Their lives will never be the same. I have really been working on rewrites of a lot of this story and hope you find it much improved!!

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Danny is an angry and offensive aging ex-teen idol who has a beef with the world. Take a trip with Danny as he internalizes his pain and anguish over the events that occurred in his life. He's got a lot of secrets to tell Grace, a writer who is researching for her latest novel. Danny's Grace is a book of hope for those who have suffered at the hands of an abuser. His hard knock life is a catalyst for an event that would forever change his life and the way he views the world. Grace and the audience is with him every painful step of the way. Life is about growth and sometimes it's about new beginnings. Prepare to use every one of your emotions as you explore his lurid world.

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Something interesting happens at this party. All comments welcome.

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Discovering inner peace continues to elude the best of intentions.

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What if a Werewolf was inflicted with worms? What if it had the same nasty habits as your household mutt? I’ve decided to put this premise to the test.

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Perry came into this world a mystery. His unique anatomy left doctors scratching their heads as Perry grew into adulthood, using his differences to his advantage against the nasty creatures in the bayou. The townsfolk of Lockport, Louisiana wondered which the scarier monster was: the scaly, cold-blooded kind that wound up in their kiddy pools every summer, or the misshapen, warm-blooded one they called to fish them out. His nephew, Jonathan Preen, just wanted to know where his uncle learned to play, not the violin like him, but that jangly old fiddle. Greater mysteries follow as Jonathan’s trip to lay his uncle to rest turns into an extended stay. Far from his home in Chicago, Jonathan adapts to life in a small town on the edge of the Louisiana wilderness where he dodges the advances of overly-hospitable Southern belles, learns that the best music comes from the heart, and wonders if the songs he plays in the bayou will be his last as he confronts his late uncle’s arch nemesis—a monstrous alligator known to the locals as Vaurien de Lafourche.

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When is it time to go?

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Jayson Abbott is a self imposed loner with a rare disorder, who is a master at staying out of stressful situations. When a new project, that could potentially bring a cure to cancer, falls in his lap he has no choice but to leave the stress free life he has created for himself and open himself up to the world again. Along the way he meets a boy, Owen Spence, who will change the way he feels about letting people close. But keeping Owen safe and alive during the next few weeks may be the hardest job of all. I am looking for all types of feedback; concept, believability, character strength and weakness, as well as grammar cues.

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SHORT STORY

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This is a contest entry for the Strongest Start Novel competition. Any thoughts on character, plot, setting, etc. welcome. The following is chapters one and two. THE OPPOSITE OF HATE explores the intersections of family, loyalty, and nationalism as Vientiane, the capital of Laos, is being taken over by Communists. The political instability drives Seng, a widowed engineer, to marry his best friend’s teenage daughter, Neela, so they can escape re-education or even worse, death. The unlikely husband and wife cross the Mekong River into Thailand as strangers.

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Yet another iteration.

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When cosmetic dermatologist Jake Goodwin meets Briana Caulder, she leaves a lingering impression, and it’s not a good one. Beautiful. Entitled. Obnoxious. In short, his new patient is the caricature of a Fairfield County, Connecticut trophy wife. But when Briana returns days later, she’s a transformed woman: soft-spoken, polite, shy. And terrified. Goodwin immediately suspects she's a victim of spousal abuse. Trapped in his own faltering marriage, he can’t help but reach out to her. But when friendship turns into something more, Briana’s powerful husband retaliates, with deadly consequences. Suddenly, Goodwin stands to lose everything: his career, his family, even his life. But can he trust Briana to help him? Or does she have her own dark, hidden agenda? All feedback is welcome! I shelved this for a while and wouldn't mind getting guidance from new sets of sharp eyes...

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Karen Phillip's life is heading in a direction she has finally chosen for herself – a direction far away from her nearly estranged father, Stanley. But one phone call and an unfortunate sense of obligation, forces her to put everything on hold as she heads back to her hometown after Stanley has an accident at a cocktail party. Karen decides to investigate what happened, managing to upset most of the locals. She starts to get the sense that Stanley's accident was no accident after all. A brief affair with a townie, a harrowing escape at a trailer park and a narrow miss from angry drug dealers are just a few of the adventures that follow, leaving Karen wondering what she has gotten her self into since "Losing Stanley".

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Consequences after berating the wrong person. All comments welcome.

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“Gaslighting” is a type of psychological abuse. False information is presented to the victims to make them doubt their own recollection of events, perception, and even their sanity. However, what if the one responsible for such seemingly terrible deeds was ultimately doing it for the benefit of their victims? In a town plagued by miracles, everyone will have to find the answers for themselves. As they face the challenges in their lives, they encounter a peculiar girl somehow connected to these strange incidents. She has needles for hair and black holes for eyes. She is Stitchface and she is watching… (So based on some of the feedback, I've made some changes. I'm hoping this gives more definition and direction to the story. Let me know what you think so far. All feedback is welcome. Thanks for reading!)

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I list this as mystery, but it's meant to be much more. It's about family and friendships in small town Texas, and hopefully, some humor along the way.

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Here is the second part of my short story, LEGS. I feel that this is the weaker half of my piece, so I'm eager to hear your criticisms. Thank you! All comments are welcome.

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Teenager Logan has decided that life is not for him and that suicide is the answer. He goes through life trying to make peace with his family and his friends before offing himself. Through this he discovers many loves including girls, parties, nature, and music. It is written as a posthumous, biographical memoir and submitted for the 2013 Strongest Start Novel Competition. Thanks for any feedback and critique!

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A short story about infidelity

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This is my second draft of my short story, LEGS. It's in a decent place, but I know it needs more revision and I'm feeling a bit stuck in that regard. I'm hoping that you guys can help me out. Thank you! All comments are welcome.

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A grizzly murder introduces newly recruited detective Simon Goodyear to the peaceful little town of Barrettsport and sends him on a three month long search for a master manipulator who entangles much of the town in his nefarious schemes. Along the way, the town, a school teacher and a young graphic artist draw Simon into their much more personal intrigues. This story is both a romance and a mystery. I really appreciate all the comments I've had from reviewers, and have made numerous changes that I think have improved the story. I feel like I've added a googolplex of commas (I know that's not possible), and look forward to some new reviews of the revised text.

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I just couldn't stand it anymore. I had to write something about it. All feed back welcome, feel free to disagree. And thanks soooo much for reading! dags:)

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Jocelyn Brooks is about to take the matrimonial plunge. Again. But this time, she wants to do it right. On the day of her wedding, she looks back on her four most pivotal relationships and winds up discovering how they've helped mold her into the woman she is today- the woman who is about to marry her future husband, who may also be a man from her past. This is my first novel. I'd love feedback on content as well as formatting since I've never been trained/educated in either. My only "research" has been reading other chick-lit so any feedback is appreciated! Thank you!

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Another simple poem that says a lot. Wrote it long ago and thought I'd share it.

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Yesterday was one of those days that nature blended elements. I was simply sitting outside on the porch and observing.. perhaps hoping for some inspiration? This is what I witnessed and hope I captured in a respectful way. It is Haiku formatting as felt it lent itself well to it. Also lets me off the hook a bit? :D Ain't the poet in town when it comes to technicalities.. Any and all comments welcome .. I take them to heart.. I ponder on them as here to learn.

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