QUERY LETTER TO AGENT REVISED/REPOSTED

I have re-jigged this letter, as per advice from my first great reviewers. The agents want a synopsis as well, but all the winning query letters on the Queryshark pages follow this format, so I'm not sure how to make a synopsis sound different from a query letter. They seem to be one and the same! If anyone has any ideas of how to jazz it up a bit more,I would be most appreciative. I don't know how to make kidnapping and murder sound jazzy :(

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