Breasts?

The weekend before my mother was scheduled to have surgery for a lung tumor, I flew up to visit her. Being full-figured, she worried that the surgical wound (which would go through her back) would prevent her from wearing a brassiere. Well, as most of you know, I'm transgendered, which means I have been undergoing gender transition from male to female and at the time I had been on estrogen for about 2 years. I had to learn a little myself about women's clothing and support garments. So, to my mom and dad's surprise, I suggested, "Gee Mom, why don't you buy a camisole shirt with a shelf bra? My mother said, "What's that?" I rolled my eyes and said, "Come on, let me take you to the mall." So, my 70-something year-old mother and I hit the mall, and after trying on a few suitable tops at the Gap, my mother exclaimed, "These are perfect!" And she bought 5 of them. (Where has she been shopping all these years that she didn't know about them?" Well, back in the car we both looked at each other and realized how odd this was for us. Her adult "son" had just helped her buy a women's support garment. "How did you know about these?" She asked. "Well, Mom...I've been wearing them myself because I've developed my own breasts in the last 2 years. Well, that opened her up to ask me questions, particularly "Why in the world would you want to have breasts?" and she gave me her own story about how she's had to deal with her own fullsome bust during her life. In the end, we laughed and enjoyed the novelty of the situation and actually developed a new intimacy we had never shared before. My folks, of course, know I'm transgendered, though I still dress androgynously around them, since they still call me by my male name, and frankly, what's the harm? They're old. Give them a break. I know who I am. I hope you enjoy the poem and take it in the humorous spirit in which it is intended...hence the sing-song meter and puns.

• Page 1 - Breasts?"The weekend before my mothe..."