Content: thriller

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Humble Sky tells the story of the development of a new drug for depression. Seen from the inside of a biotechnology start-up company, four characters' perspectives are used: Jacob (a middle manager and smart aleck), Emma (Jacob's spouse), Tony (Jacob's boss), and Patty (Jacob's employee). Tony manages the company like a dysfunctional parent and requires employees to spy on one another. Emma suffers from depression and pressures Jacob onto a Texas-themed cruise ship. Patty saves the scientific integrity of their work from Tony's profiteering and reaps her own financial reward. Jacob travels to the Caribbean, pits Texan and French passengers against one another and in a Book of Job-inspired sequence, he has a conversation with God. Feedback of all kinds welcome. The novel has been read by several others (friends mainly) and I'm ready for a tougher crowd.

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This is a rough work in progress. I had an idea that has been bouncing off the walls in my head for about 18 months now, slowly developing into a full length film, in my head. The challenge is getting it down on paper, making it flow. The whole story has played out repeatedly up here, and I just hope I can translate that on paper so that it has the same effect there. Any and all feedback on flow, punctuation, grammar, story ideas, etc., good or bad, are greatly appreciated. Just keep in mind that the next chapters may be slow to appear on paper as I need to process all the scenes I have in here, and get them on paper in some sort of orderly fashion. Thanks in advance for reading.

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Lisa Kaamp operates a small childcare business out of her home in the sleepy little town of Nogeksum, Michigan. Highly respected and known for going the extra mile for her daycare kids, Lisa thought she had handled every daycare emergency possible. But nothing prepared her for the nightmare she now faced. Lisa awakes one morning to find herself bound and gagged, four strange men in her home, and the daycare children being held hostage in the next room. Terrorized by her captors as the authorities work to meet the ransom deadline, she tries negotiating with the men for the release of the children, and soon realizes that at least one of them has no intention of letting anyone go. With the deadline quickly approaching, Lisa must do the unimaginable to protect the children and get everyone out alive.

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Bronte a fiercely independent woman who, in her early thirties, is unsure that the life she has lead up until now is one that is built upon truth. Through a series of events and the continuous unfolding of a lifelong mystery she comes to learn things about herself, her family and love that she was never inclined to delve into before. I'm looking for all type of feedback. If you think it I'd love to hear it!

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Okay so after a year of reviews from everyone on the site, and after some soul searching, some serious edits, rewrites and revisions I am now reposting my book, Redemption Don't Come Cheap. It is now called - Once Upon A Time In Brooklyn - and I hope you like it. The story opens in 1964 when three nine year-old boys from diverse backgrounds view the movie Goldfinger for the twentieth time and see no problem in emulating their hero by painting the baby sister of one of the boys bright red, from neck to toes. Fortunately, the baby takes it all very well, and is unharmed, but the aftermath of the boys’ punishment rips their friendship apart. In fact, they barely talk for thirty years until a break-in at a local store, a twist of fate, and a series of letters from the grave inexplicably and simultaneously draw them back to the scene of the crime. Here they reveal multiple ‘long kept’ secrets under the stress of a new, shared predicament and it becomes clear that at least one of them may have to die to save the other two.

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-Summary- "Get a Clue" Madelyn Berichon, (or if you'd rather not risk bodily injury you can call her Maddi) an accomplished Paralegal/Criminal Profiler in Atlanta, moved to Seagate Island for a fresh start, leaving behind a shattered relationship and taking with her some old emotional baggage and a cat named Orphan Annie. Maddi is what you might call a powerful petite. At first glance she is five feet three inches of slim, blond, blue eyed cuteness (never let her hear you call her cute). After getting to know her a little better, you'll find that she's a compact package of dyno'mite'. On assignment on Seagate Island, Maddi embarks on an exciting and overtly dangerous roller coaster ride to find a vicious killer and prove the innocence of the law firm’s client, while covertly carrying out her mission. Along the way she meets her match in Mac Adams, a freelance investigative journalist. Of course there comes into play the inevitable conflict between paralegal/client confidentiality and the journalistic need for information, but they handle it in a mature adult manner (most of the time). Maddi is undercover as a Paralegal with, Mathews, Rickert and Lyndel, Attorneys at Law. Robert Mathews, the only living member left in the firm and one of two lawyers on the Island, desperately needed the help of a sharp, intelligent paralegal like Maddi. He had been commissioned by millionaire humanitarian William Patterson to defend his son Josh who was charged with the murder of Deborah Jennings, the owner of a local Import/Export business. She was found bludgeoned on the floor of her shop among the artifacts that she had been unpacking. It seems that Josh was found by the police standing over the body with the murder weapon in his hand. Maddi finds herself questioning people such as, Senatorial candidate Rodney Maten and his wife Vallerie, son Nick and Daughter Laurel. They seem to be friendly and cooperative on the surface, yet there is an undercurrent of trepidation. She finds that many of the upper crust "Native Islanders" have more than their share of skeletons in their closets and their lives are full of secrets that they will do almost anything to keep private. In the course of their investigation Mac and Maddi uncover a plot that reaches to the very core of the elite society of the Island and abroad. It's an abhorrent situation that involves drug cartels and politicians and cold blooded murder. It is a conspiracy so intriguingly incredible that she has difficulty convincing authorities and even her own boss that it actually exists. While putting her own life in danger Maddi must make sense of it all, complete her assignment, clear Josh and deal with a budding romance with Mac. She does all this and more in that engagingly funny, candid, one-of-a-kind Maddi way.

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Knighthawk and I are co-writing this "urban fantasy" novel. The main character (Oli) is from my previous novel which some of you may have reviewed. This is a whole new story. We're doing a lot of front-end work - establishing three acts, outlining the scenes, developing and nailing down character arcs and through-lines before doing the real nitty gritty of developing the prose. But we were eager to see your reaction to the "tone" of the story, the prose style, and if you find it compelling. In other words, would you buy it? Any and all feeback is welcomed.

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This is raw, a work in progress. I'm taking a risk here, going out of my comfort zone by putting up something that's not yet finished. I’m hoping you’ll see some growth from me in this. Sapphire Reign takes place almost 10 years after Kings & Queens. I’d appreciate reviews from readers, who've read my first book, since they can (hopefully) see what I’m doing differently and if it’s working, but anyone is welcome to read this. However, since it is a sequel, spoilers abound. So only proceed if you have no intention of reading Book 1.

My mini-sum now: In a world where wickedness is exalted and an evil agenda is corrupting the young and innocent, a 26-year-old woman, trapped in the grip of agony, receives a glimmer of hope and battles heaven and hell to reclaim the happiness that's been stripped from her. ***Minor change. I originally had this about 10 years later, then switched it to 8. Now it's closer to 10 again. I forgot I had placed Majesty's sister Skye in high school. She's 15 in this story.

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This is a mystery/thriller. A second novel utilizing the same protagonists is almost complete, and a third has been outlined. I have two offers of publication with small presses, one a POD internet publisher. I would appreciate your feedback. Golden Conspiracy: Synopsis In 1503, a Spanish castaway washes up on the island of Molokai, thousands of miles from where any European has ever sailed. His crescent-shaped gold medallion is inscribed with a riddle pointing the way to plundered gold. Captured by a young warrior, he must fight a new battle for survival. Five centuries later, Spanish historian Ricardo Montoya is contracted to translate the recently discovered log of the Columbus-era guardian ship Santa Ynez, which he then compares with the navigator’s diary from the treasure ship Solitario. Both documents report that the Solitario burned and sank off the Florida-Georgia coast in 1501 after “the devil’s minions” possessed the crew. Confirming his employer’s suspicion of a long-ago conspiracy to plunder the gold, Montoya discovers an article in the New York Times reporting the recent find of a Spanish gold cross, circa early sixteenth century, in an excavation on Molokai, and believes it could be a link to the Solitario’s gold. In hock to dangerous people for his huge gambling losses, Montoya sells Jacsen Kidd and Pericles Schmoond’s confidential information to Louis Damia, a ruthless antiquities collector and the nemesis of Jac’s father, Mandrago Kidd. Kidd, descendant of the infamous Scots pirate, and his partner, gastronome Pericles Schmoond, begin to unravel the deception. In a north Florida coastal village, they are covertly followed by an old enemy of Jac’s, long thought dead. Then, in the Hawaiian Islands, Peri’s nephew, archeologist Michael Schmoond, finds a revelation in a traditional chant. This leads him to excavate a petroglyph depicting an encounter on Molokai between a warrior named Liko and a white “god” wearing the sun around his neck. Michael believes that the depiction of the sun is a gold medallion that may contain a clue to the gold’s location. Nicole Thomas, Damia’s comely operative, is sent to uncover information from Jac, but passion sparks between them, and before Nikki can disclose her deception, she finds her boss murdered. Near an ancient village in Molokai’s Halawa Valley, Jac and Peri enter a savage past as they trace the stranger’s footsteps using clues from the chant. Lurking nearby is former KGB operative Garth Moska, who has vowed to kill Jac and take the gold. After a harrowing struggle while swimming through a maze of lava tubes and caverns, Jac uncovers the Spaniard’s remains and unearths the inscribed medallion. Moska kidnaps Nicole and Kimo, the party’s local Hawaiian guide, and though Jac and Peri manage to free her, Moska gets away. With Moska in relentless pursuit, Peri, Michael, Jac, and Jac’s, father Mandrago Kidd, find themselves entangled in a maze of treachery and murder. Following the clues in the riddle, they sail to the Brazilian island of Fernando de Norhona, where Jac begins to unravel the mystery. Soon, though, he faces daunting odds to save his friends’ lives. In an encounter with Moska, Peri is gravely wounded while trying to save Jac’s life. Jac and Moska drop from a cliff into the sea, and in what seems a final dead end, a simple gust of wind provides the final clue, leading the survivors to the gold. Two hundred miles away, near Recife on the Brazilian mainland, a light plane lands with another survivor of the ordeal on Fernando de Norhona. Moska must wait for another day to kill the hated Jacsen Kidd. Golden Conspiracy(excerpt) Prologue November 1503 Molokai, Hawaiian Islands Felipe de Córdoba groaned, feeling as if someone had poured hot gravel under his eyelids. He tried to blink away the salty crust that stuck to his lashes and blurred his vision. He could hear the muted crash of waves. Was he still in the cursed sea, floundering and gasping for air? Or perhaps he was already dead. But then, the dead didn’t feel pain like this . . . unless he had been cast into the inferno. And yet, he saw colors—blue, green, and . . . what was this? White sand . . . “Gracias . . . mi . . . Sal . . . vador . . .” Just saying the words aloud made his cracked lips sting. Gagging and coughing, he retched clear bile and seawater onto the sand. He had never felt such thirst. If the devil should appear to him, he would sell his soul this instant for a bellyful of water. He rolled over, feeling the solid beach beneath him. Where . . . ? Birds sang in the deep greenness that stretched away from the sea. There lay salvation, or at least the hope of it . . . shade, and perhaps even water! Felipe pushed up onto his knees, struggling to stand, but tumbled facedown in the sand. Reaching out in front of him, he sank his fingers into the sand and began to claw his way forward. Every beat of his heart pulsed in the jellyfish stings that he felt as meandering lines of pure fire. Ahead, the lush green foliage tantalized him, drawing him on. But his strength was gone. He grew dizzy. . . . And there Felipe de Córdoba collapsed, with one hand barely touching the rough trunk of a coco palm. * * * Liko surveyed the stone fish trap he had built. He was pleased, for it had held together through the high tide. Recalling the days of lugging and placing each lava rock so that it fit together perfectly to catch and hold the sacred moi, he felt proud. His ali’i would be pleased. Having lived through only eighteen great storms, already Liko was a prominent warrior who had raised his family’s status. He examined the wall he had built enclosing the stone tide pool. Seeing that none of the rocks had been dislodged by the waves, he stepped out into the limpid, knee-deep water and threw his net. It held two plump moi, fit for the ali’i’s table. He felt the breeze against his wet skin and turned to study the horizon. The wind had kicked up, stinging his face with tiny sand particles, and in the distance he could see a furious little god approaching his island, looking for a quarrel. Fearful of being hit by one of the god’s killing shafts of light, he left the pond for the shelter of the jungle. Liko remembered a similar day, when he was half his present age, playing on the beach, as darkness signaled the coming of another angry god. A warrior had run out from the cover of the palms and onto the open beach to hurry the children to cover, and the god had struck him dead with a bolt of light. Squinting to keep the blowing sand out of his eyes, Liko scanned beyond the long stretch of pale sand for any sign of an invasion from the neighboring islands. Even though the war with the big island had been over for several moons, the peace was a fitful one, and like all the warriors in his clan, Liko remained vigilant. The angry roar of the approaching god’s thunder startled Liko, and he remembered what the elders had told him in his lessons: You must learn many things for yourself, young warrior. Learn from everything you see, hear, and touch—from the sky, the water, and the earth. Listen to your father and your grandfathers, gather all you can from their personal stories, and remember them, for they are the keys to your survival. And how right the elders had been, for already the stories had saved his life. Liko shuddered thinking of the recent war, his ordeal and miraculous survival . . . his immortality. Early one morning, before the sun god’s golden eye peered out above the water, Liko and a dozen other warriors from his island had pushed one of ten canoes out into the surf and paddled to the center of the channel, where their enemies from the big island waited. As the two clans came closer, they taunted and jeered each other. Spears flew. The battle had begun. With his island brothers on either side of him, Liko thrust and parried with his koa-wood spear, when an errant wave made him step out onto the outrigger lashing for balance. He had heard the warrior next to him groan as an enemy’s wooden war club, set with shark teeth, caught him in the ribs. And though unhurt himself, Liko could see trickles and ribbons of blood painting the arms, legs, and bare chests of brother and enemy alike around him. But the Molokai warriors stood fast. Liko pivoted sideways to avoid a spear thrust, when the warrior next to him accidentally bumped him. And before he could so much as cry out, he lost his balance and pitched forward into the maelstrom of paddles and weapons and blood-tinged water between the canoes. He saw the first fin break the surface and glide toward him, and he prepared for the awful, rending bite. But he felt only rough skin bump him aside as the shark homed in on the blood of the wounded. Now he could hear a change in the timber of the shouts and screams as the wounded were hit, and red clouds bloomed out from them in the clear water. Though the battle continued to rage above him, Liko forgot about the clubs and spears of the invaders, for something much more terrible was flashing and ripping in the water around him. And as the sharks began their furious feeding and the shrieks and death wails grew louder, Liko prayed and waited to utter his last sound. Tomorrow, when the great golden eye began its journey across the sky, he wondered which of his body parts would be digesting in a shark’s belly and which would wash up on a beach as pale, bloodless shreds to be picked apart by the crabs. With a cry of desperation, he made one final prayer to Mako, the great shark god, who had led his people to these islands all those thousands of moons ago, and Kauhuhu, the god shark who was cared for by the people of the Halawa. Kauhuhu was a man eating shark only when one of the people committed a wrong, and Liko never committed a wrong. He was a good warrior. “Oh, great Mako and Kauhuhu, please spare Liko. I promise never to kill any of your children for the rest of my life, if you will but spare me. Please, great shark gods, bid your children not to eat me. My family needs me.” Liko pleaded, realizing as he said it that this would be no great compromise. He would gladly worship Mako, and Kauhuhu, along with the only other god he truly feared: the great goddess Pele. Strangely, Liko found himself moving away from the sharks. A current was carrying him toward shore. He cried and laughed in the same breath, rejoicing as he raised his eyes reverently toward the sky. The sharks were now behind him, tearing and ripping, ignoring him as if he were a god. Now he was in the surf, and the wave tossed him over its face, pitching and turning him, making him feel as if he were inside a whirlwind, twisting and turning as it carried him toward the beach. Arching his back, he spread his arms, and his palms hit sand. He stood up in the shallows, free. It was as if the great god had guided him toward his own island to cast him ashore, untouched but for the scrape on his side where the shark’s rough skin had hit him. The great shark gods heard my pleas, he thought, and the story of Liko will forever be told in a chant documenting my greatness. My people will sing my story, and pass it on from generation to generation, making me immortal! Many warriors from both islands had perished in the great channel, some from spear thrusts and the crushing, tearing blows of their enemies’ war clubs, but many more had been taken by the ravenous sharks. And on that day of death and mourning, Liko had become immortal. A gust of wind brushed his face, awakening him from his daydream, and he looked up at the black clouds bearing down on him. Slinging the net with the two plump moi over his shoulder, he sang his chant as he ran through the woodrose and palms separating the jungle from the beach. Before taking the jungle path to the village, he would pick some breadfruit melons for his family and his betrothed. “Like a God. Like a God. In the midst of a great war, Liko was thrown into the sea. Terrified warriors screamed as sharks fed on them. Aieee! Aieee! Liko, like a god, was not harmed. Liko, like a god, was not harmed. Mako saved him and let him pass. Kauhuhu, the Halawa god shark saved him and let him pass. A Miracle! A Miracle! Liko is like a God!” *** Awakened by the windblown sand stinging his face, Felipe de Córdoba moaned, “Agua . . .” He had to find water. Though his knee joints ached, he forced his battered body to stand, and just as he turned his grimacing face upward, something smacked against his eye . . . a fat raindrop, followed quickly by several others. He opened his mouth, feeling the blissful wetness on his swollen tongue and parched throat. “Gracias, mi Salvador,” he cried out after gulping down the first thirst-quenching trickle. And even though the liquid stung in the salt-coated cracks of his lips, and every movement of his body sent painful signals to his brain, he didn’t care. Spreading his arms, he cried, “Ya estoy vivo!—I am alive!” The fresh rainwater tasted better than the finest Andalusian wine. He licked his hands, slurping from them, and as the rain’s intensity increased, he faced the storm and leaned forward into the wind, his open mouth catching the drops. *** Liko came to where a coral isthmus rose several feet above the beach, forming a spit where the forest ran to the water’s edge. He crossed the narrow strip of jungle and stopped before venturing onto the open beach. Cautiously he peered out from behind a large fern to make sure no enemies had made land. He was utterly unprepared for the sight he beheld. Liko stared, frozen in awe. He could not believe his eyes. It was a god, leaning forward, provoking the anger of the approaching god’s exhalations, consuming the spears of water sent its way. To Liko’s further amazement, the storm’s rage abated suddenly. Was this an apparition? It was as if this strange god had devoured the demon god’s onslaught. No one, in all the stories he could recount, had ever seen anything like this. This god was tall, with pale skin, and—strangest of all—hair on his face. Liko watched the tall, skinny stranger stretch his arms up toward the sky. But what was that? He seemed to be wearing a band of the golden sun god’s skin around his neck. Surely, Liko thought, it would be another sign of my greatness if I can capture such a god. There was only one way, he decided: charge and subdue him. He recalled, when he was a young boy, his grandfather telling him, Act fierce! Growl like a wild pig, and threaten your adversary while always moving toward him. Scream louder, take command, channel your fear into rage and aggression, and you will make him fear you—and conquer him. Your fear will have made you the stronger. *** Too late, out of the corner of his eye, Felipe saw the lone figure running toward him. And before he could react, he was tackled, crushed to the ground, slamming his head so hard that he almost fainted away. He saw the crude but lethal wooden knife at his throat, felt it puncture his skin. “No!I am a friend! A friend!” Felipe yelled, pleading with his arms outstretched, but the warrior only increased the pressure of his grip. *** “Aaieeee! Aaaaargh!” Liko screamed at the lesser god, hoping he would not vanish. He knew he had to best him with sound—His grandfather had told him it was the way to gain the advantage. Liko was proud that his voice boomed louder than any in his village. But he had never used it in combat with an enemy—or a god. Liko was afraid he would be killed. “I surrender!” the pale god screamed. Liko knew he had won the encounter when he saw the god lie back, unmoving. He breathed a sigh of relief. He didn’t want to kill this god—only to subdue him, prevent his escape, and bring him to the village, where once again the people would know of Liko’s greatness. If he should die, he may come back as a greater god and kill Liko. But take the god to the village, and another chant would be sung to document Liko’s immortality and elevate him to the status of a great leader. Slowly releasing his grip, he motioned the god to get up and move along the jungle path. *** With the savage’s knife at his back, Felipe passed under enormous green fronds and towering trees, stumbling now and again on the uneven ground. Praying that he was not about to be eaten by savages, he reached up to his neck to touch his cross and pray for his life. With a horrified shock, he realized that it was gone. He remembered clutching it when the sea threw him onto the beach. Looking back, he pointed toward the beach. “My crucifix . . . it must have torn loose,” he said to his uncomprehending captor. “I’m lost without it. My grandmother gave it to me when I was a child, and I’ve worn it ever since. I must go back and find it. I must go back,” he said, pointing at the golden crescent moon medallion at his throat. Thinking the native understood, Felipe started back toward the beach. “Arghhhhh!” the savage screamed, and jabbed the knife forward, pricking the skin on Felipe’s back. “Hijo de la . . . !” Felipe shouted, whirling around, but the warrior’s knife was suddenly at his throat. He understood: he must obey or have no chance at survival. Reluctantly, he turned and walked, just ahead of the knife, in the direction the savage pointed. Green and yellow birds, darting from bush to tree, cried shrill warnings of the approaching warrior and his captive. Felipe had no trouble walking where the path was mostly flat, but where he had to ascend muddy inclines, his feet slipped along the wet tree roots and banged against rocks and boulders. He prayed the journey would end soon, and hoped he wouldn’t be sacrificed to some pagan god. Blood oozed from a thousand tiny cuts, and his heavily callused soles, softened from his ordeal in the sea, were raw and bleeding. But he kept moving forward, ever aware of the prodding knife at his back. Certainly his mortal end was near. Sapped of energy, he stumbled dizzily forward. Flecks of light merged and grew into blackness, his vision blurring from the salty, stinging sweat running into his eyes. But still the knife prodded him on. He struggled but missed lifting his leg over a large fallen tree, and fell forward, landing hard. But up he scrambled, just ahead of the relentless poking knife. Just in front of them, Liko heard the familiar trickle of a cool stream that crossed the path. He was thirsty and needed a drink, even if his captive did not. But then again, perhaps he did thirst, since he appeared as a man. Liko tucked the knife into his thong and pushed hard against the god’s back, sending him to his knees at the water’s edge. *** When the native’s right arm pointed toward the water and he cupped his hands and brought them up to his mouth, Felipe understood that he was motioning for him to drink. Merciful God, thank you, he thought, nodding his head vigorously. And when the native nodded likewise, Felipe knew that they had made their first communication. He gulped the water like a man possessed, and at last, his thirst satisfied, he lay back to rest. He closed his eyes to welcome the darkness. *** Liko moved closer and leaned in for a better look at the piece of the sun around the god’s neck. Dare he touch it? Only a great god could do so and not be burned. *** Felipe could feel the savage’s eyes watching him. Cracking one eye open, he caught the native staring at the medallion around his neck. In his exhaustion, he flashed back to when the gold was plundered. Now that my master perished in the storm, the plan will remain a mystery to all but me. The medallion my master entrusted me with gives the location of the gold, and the gold is now mine. I dedicated my life to my master, and the reward of twenty years’ loyal service will make me rich beyond my dreams. But it will all mean nothing if I don’t survive. I must survive. I must! Felipe ’s thoughts drifted back to his harrowing ordeal—and his ship’s fate. . . . *** He looked out through the darkness, sure he had caught sight of land in the distance. Frantic crewmen reefed the sails as the wind screamed with a force that whipped the sea with hell’s own fury. Felipe knew they were doomed. As the wind wailed and the black storm raged, the mainmast splintered, spilling its rigging and killing several sailors. The ship had been moving aimlessly, blind, its floating compass needle washed away by a giant wave. Felipe heard the shrill, screaming voice of the gale and saw terror in the faces of the remaining men, heard their faint screams as, one by one, they were thrown into the sea. He had tried to find his master, but he, too, was gone. Finally, the ship rode up the crest of a colossal wave, which threw it down, splitting it apart like dry leaves in a winter windstorm. Felipe screamed a final prayer when he felt the timber he clung to being ripped away, catapulting him into the mountainous seas. The undulating debris of the ship scattered with each monstrous new wave. Breaking the surface, Felipe spit the choke of salt water from his lungs, fighting to stay afloat, and grasped on to a curved floating timber that looked to be from the ship’s keel. Amazingly, he was not alone, for there, clinging to life on the same timber, was the ship’s first mate. But it was not to be, for after the storm had passed and the elation of their survival was overtaken by exhaustion, a terrified scream pierced the black, moonless night. It was the last earthly sound from his fellow castaway. It was over in seconds, and Felipe knew he would never rid his mind of the image of the severed arm wound in the rigging on the timber. Nor would he ever forget the scream as the great, dark creature brushed past him, carrying away its human meal. Felipe, resigning himself to the same fate, had made peace with his Savior, yet here he was in this savage eden—captured, yes, but miraculously alive. He must try to communicate with the heathen again. And if that failed, perhaps he could tempt him to come closer to examine the medallion. It might present an opportunity to escape. Feeling a surge of strength return to him after drinking the water, Felipe focused his eyes on the savage staring at his medallion. Pointing at the shining disk, he said, “Gold . . . this is precious gold.” ***

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This is the start of a series of stories about a young man that makes a tragic mistake but benefits from it and has to deal with the struggle between guilt and the desire to live.

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Sean Williams, son to a powerful senator, must take a stand on the grey edges of power and justice. A secret group of assasins is handing out punishment to those too powerful for the law to touch. Sean is brought into a shadowy world where morality is malleable and right and wrong are hard to define. He is pulled along a path where he must choose between a desire to live up to his father's expectations and doing what he believes is right - he cannot have both. WARNING: THIS FIRST CHAPTER CONTAINS EXPLICIT SEX.

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When everyone around her starts dying and a mysterious young detective working the case, Siera struggles to understand the unexplainable with her time quickly running out..... I'd greatly appreciate any feedback people can give me, i've never written a novel before. I also tend to post the chapters before much editing, so I know they need to be (mainly because i'm crap at grammar and english rules, so i'm learning from your comments as i go!!). I'd really like any comments on the flow of the chapter, content, anything that stands out etc....All feedback is welcome!!

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Sir Isaac Newton was a brilliant scientist, a crazed chemist, even an obsessed researcher of biblical verses, but it is what few people ever knew about the reticent man that has Harvard Divinity Professor, Michael DiBianco running for his life, struggling to find answers to a mystery that not only threatens Christianity, but the very meaning of his own existence.

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In his struggle to save his company, a young chief executive ends up fighting to save his life. This near future tale addresses the key elements of what constitute real power in society, loyalty and honour as opposed to money and violence. ************* I am looking for feedback on individual chapters, especially ones that haven't received any reviews. On things like grammer, structure, character and dialogue, as well as an indication of where the chapter stands on the boring barometre. (Revised Title; 16/02/08)

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This story is a modern-day fantasy about a burned out salesman who checks out of an insane asylum to go on a quest to find the world’s greatest peace maker and save him from being assassinated. Why would anyone want to kill someone like this? Because most people don’t really want peace. Oh, they say they do, but what they really want is more money, more control of their lives, more love, more sex, more of any and all of the best things in life, including no more problems that get in the way of getting more stuff. The disillusioned hero, Morgan Shores, is joined on his quest by Mina Van Cortland, a plein air artist. His mentor, Virgil Wiggins, is dead but is brought back to life on a smoke screen monitor by using a secret alchemy process. Along the way, Morgan and Mina catch glimpses of a magical sunrise atop the Great Wall of the Manitou in the Catskill Mountains and take a Shaman’s vision quest in Ecuador’s Amazon forest. They also discover how conflict was born into the world and delivered to the Lord of the Sky in the Tien Shen Mountains on the far side of China. Near the end, while wearing special glasses grafted to his head, Morgan sees parasites clinging to human beings that slowly drain and warp a person’s desire for soul satisfying pleasure and happiness. In the end, the peace maker dies in the arms of his would be champion. What the survivors are left with is the wisdom required to create a force for peace no one can kill.

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When an impulsive FBI agent discovers she is about to be fired, she tries to save her job by finding the serial killer targeting reality shows and saving the final victim. She finally discovers they have targeted the wrong people and that the man she has been protecting is the real killer. Now she must stop the killer before he claims his final victim and gets away. Note: R Rated in terms of language. There is a fairly graphic murder.

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In all its beauty lies magic, or is it something more sinister than darkness? Is it evil? When a strange stone, which was buried 137 years ago in Washington, Missouri, surfaces in Jason Hollister’s hands, everything changes. McKenzie Topelo Jason’s friend from childhood vanishes, and a strange imposture suddenly appears out of nowhere claiming to be her, but Jason isn’t fooled, he knows the stone is responsible and he’s determined to find a way to become a prisoner of the same stone, to save McKenzie and bring her home. This is the begining of another book. All comments are welcomed. Thanks, L.A.Thunder :)

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When Detective Theodore Gill discovers a serial killer has breeched the small town of Chelsea, Michigan he realizes quickly that the investigation will be the hardest case he’s ever worked. Bizarre and strange things are happening to the victim’s bodies after they are murdered, and evidence simply vanishes. Mandy Steven’s has been assigned to work with Gill on the case, and together they are led down the dark path of deceit, as the man responsible for the murders taunts them, with trickery, and sometimes a treat, and before long the two of them become a part of the killer’s charade. When their world suddenly advances several months into the future over night, Mandy and Gill realize it is only a matter of time, before they too fall victims, to the dark man’s magic, and suddenly they become trapped in a game of cat and mouse when Tessa Johnson, and several of their co-workers disappear. When their investigation leads them to an old cemetery, Gill and Mandy find themselves trying to piece the clues together, about the black cats, the deserted cemetery building, and the wild bats, that the dark man is leaving behind. Soon the two of them realize, the dark man is much too powerful, and every lead they investigate, brings them closer to their own demise. What Gill and Mandy know is it is only a matter of time, before the dark man catches the two of them, and decides who’s going to live or die, and when it’s time for a: TRICKERY TREAT

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A brother's search for his sister leads to more questions than it answers..... Just an idea that I had on the bus today.

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Hopelessly out of his depth, after discovering that a terrorist group is planning an attack on Israel, John Blackburn turns to his eighty year old mother and her fellow retirees from British Intelligence at the Whetstone Bridge club for help. As they begin to piece together the truth, a frightening sequence of global events begins to unfold. John and the octogenarians realize the world is heading for the brink, and they are the only ones who can stop it.

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Jake Johnston is a talented screenwriter and aspiring director who's striving to make it in Hollywood. One day, he receives a cryptic email from a stranger offering him riches beyond his wildest dreams. Accepting the money and the conditions attached to the offer change his life in ways he could have never imagined. This is the first part of a two part story. I'VE MADE EDITS BASED ON THE VERY VALUABLE FEEDBACK I'VE RECEIVED ON THIS STORY SO FAR. THANK YOU.

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Sophie has a secret. A secret she buried seven years ago. At least she thought she did.

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This short story was posted last year and then taken down from the site. I apologise to anyone who has read it before, I don't want to bore you! I have never submitted it a magazine or competition. Taking the advice of my good reviewers, I have edited it as the reviews have come in. I don't want to re-write and re-post again, it would try everyone's tolerance too far!

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What would you do if modern day, drug running pirates raided your dive boat and shot half of your crew?

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Someone is murdering the good people of Greenfield, and there’s talk of a serial killer on the loose. Finding him should be an easy task for a guy with super-powers: too bad he falls out of the sky. If Marshall Jamrozik has any hope of ending the killing spree, he’ll need a little help from a morbidly obese shop keeper who just happens to be a witch, and a hard drinking senior citizen with a penchant for lifting heavy objects... like automobiles. Corrupt cops, Ogres, thirty six-year-old Siamese cats, and of course, the Netherworld. All in a day’s work when you’re trying to save a city from a baneful and simmering evil that’s about to be unleashed.

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Hotshot Sydney detective Max Beckett wakes up in a seedy hotel room with two dead bodies, and police hammering at the door. He flees the scene and sets in train a series of events that plunges him into the twisted worlds of a deranged serial killer, Russian mobsters and a band of terrorists preparing to launch an unprecedented attack on Australian soil. Only Max and a sexy Russian intelligence officer can save the day in this desperate race against time. A rollicking good read that adds the name of Max Beckett to the pantheon of crime noir heroes.

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This flash fiction was written a fair while ago and now it needs to pay it's rent for being on my computer! I have plans to send it, in March, to a horror fiction competition here in Aussieland. I don't know whether it is horrible enough to class as horror. I have tightened this story in accordance with advice given in this latest round of reviews.

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Devon Greyson is the most beautiful and sweet girl Seth Caine has ever met. When Seth realizes that he allowed her into his heart and into his soul, he can’t help but protect her. Then Devon’s life and well being are threatened by a mad man and Seth would do anything to save her, including becoming a cold blooded killer.

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Dr. Maxwell “Max” Warden’s enjoyment of his dream position with the Center for Disease Control is short lived when the lives of a number of his friends and fellow researchers are lost in an outbreak of an unknown virus in Somalia. Max is soon thrust into a world of intrigue and danger, where an automatic weapon is as important as his microscope. He leads an operation into the heart of the unknown to rescue his friends, not sure if they are even still alive, and becomes embroiled in a terrorist plot that promises to rock the world.

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On August 21, 2016, Houston, Texas will be virtually destroyed by the most powerful hurricane ever recorded on the face of the earth - during the second day of the Summer Olympic Games. This is the story about a city at the edge of doom as billions of people around the world watch its final hours live; a mayor who has spent almost his entire life rebuilding the oil city for this moment and who will not face the devastating reality of the destruction of all that he has built; an emergency management coordinator who is torn between impossible choices that must be made and the politics that shape them; a county judge who must choose between his national political aspirations and a leap of faith, and a woman who has studied hurricanes her whole life and knows what is about to happen, and who must save millions of lives using her knowledge and will alone, and who must summon the courage to embrace the destiny that she did not know was hers until the last night of a city's existence. This is the first of three planned novels, collectively titled The Landfall Trilogy. The second novel will be Empirefall and the third will be Earthfall.

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“When the need arises, God won’t bother with plagues and floods. He’ll just send me.” Someone is murdering L.A.’s most depraved criminals. As a favor to the LAPD, former drug-runner, turned cop, turned millionaire playboy, Hale Parrish, agrees to use his supernatural talents to investigate. His search is short-lived when the vigilante, referring to himself as “Judgment,” tracks Hale down to reveal a life-changing secret: both of them are members of an elite bloodline chosen to enact God’s wrath upon the wicked. While Hale decides whether his birthright is a blessing or a curse, shadows from his criminal past emerge, forcing him to face his demons, protect his family, and reclaim control of his destiny. At 90,000 words, Light of Judgment is a dark, gritty, fast-paced thriller with spiritual undertones.

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Danny Marx is abruptly torn from his unpromising life as an average office grunt, by a woman he's had a crush on for weeks before actually meeting her. Now facing a series of unexpected and confusing threats, he finds that the more he learns about Caprice, the less sense she makes to him. This book is a bit of an experiment for me on several levels, not the least of which is to find out whether I am capable of writing a short novel. The sci-fi elements begin to emerge in the as-yet-unposted chapters four and five, so bear with it if it appears to be something else at first. NOTE TO POTENTIAL REVIEWERS: As with any novel, the point of entry should be chapter one. With Caprice in particular, if you jump in anywhere else, you will almost certainly miss the entire point of the story. That danger will increase exponentially as I add more chapters. The kind of feedback I need more than anything else is about plot and character development, so latecomer reviews, while well-intentioned, won't be of value. Please start from the beginning.

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When Mike Foley arrives at his San Diego home to find the police ransacking it because his former lover implicated him in a murder, he and Rosemary Sanchez, his ex-girlfriend and current partner, are plunged into an adrenalin-charged odyssey filled with dirty money, high comedy and low characters. Can they stay alive and clear Foley's name while grappling with their own complicated relationship and the re-emergence of Clare Rousseau, the woman who tore them apart?

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