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Synopsis - In Celia Reynolds eyes, life is perfect. She has a wonderful loving family including a sister that is her best friend. Her career is skyrocketing and she has more male admirers than she can keep up with. Then, her world is shattered when her sister Gabi takes her own life. As she questions her sister’s suicide and peels back the layers of her ideal life, she realizes that life is not perfect nor is it meant to be. Her journey of self discovery takes her from an elegant 20th floor apartment in New York City to Washington, DC and the Islands of South Carolina. Along the way she learns a family secret that forces her to see her self and her sister in a different light - all with help from some unlikely sources - an orangutan named Nikkee and a Voodoo Priestess named Mira. *** Requests - All I can ask for is honest feedback. Give it to me straight ; ).

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This is a story of a missionary family who goes to the Guatemalan highlands near the Mexican border to spread God's Word to the native indigenous Mam-speaking population. The family is befriended by a local drug lord. Immediately the temptations begin. By the time reality sets in, it is too late and they are trapped in luxury. This is literary fiction despite the young age of the narrator. He is telling the story from the future.

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This story is a day in the life of Alexandria Cooper, a 15 year old medium that wishes she wasn't. Up until today, she has been trying to dodge her gift. Today, she must face it and use it to save those close to her, or she may loose more than her freedom from her gift.

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Ayareli (A.K.A. Sabrielle, then Taryn) and Sabarain move with their parents from Merienneth to High Meadow. They become adults in a world of winged horses and conspiracy where they must learn what fires their passion and what tempers it. Their parents, Jol and Carren, must balance dreams and family. I'm looking for feedback on the theme of balancing the duties and pleasures of your life. All four of my main characters need to learn how to do that or risk losing their family. Are you getting that? Is it too subtle? too obvious?

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This novel involves three lives caught up in the miserable web of slavery. Desperation and vengeance drive the three main characters: Assad, a moor and military man is betrayed by an empire that is being torn apart; Alain Gravois, the son of a fisherman, living in Nantes, France, struggles to become his own man; and Osawe, a warrior, living in a small village situated between two warring kingdoms along the 'slave coast' of Africa, struggles to survive. France, the 'slave coast' of Africa, Morocco and Haiti are the backdrop to their story which spans twenty-three years, 1727 to 1750. All criticism is welcome, and thanks to all who have helped.

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Synopsis: Phillip is a college student living in New Orleans who teaches karate and does magic shows to make ends meet. After two mysterious strangers sweep Phillip into a strange world where magic is real "for his own safety" Phillip is forced to use all of his fighting and sleight of hand skills just to stay alive. Will Phillip survive long enough to discover all of the secrets of his own cloudy past and why powerful forces seek his destruction? Feedback desired: This is my first attempt at a fantasy novel so I would appreciate thorough criticism and advice by those more experienced.

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Big Red comes home to roost.

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Finally a home at last.

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Two together on the long road home.

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Satirical philosophical take on life from the perspective of a 44-year-old, cigar smoking, bourbon drinking, environmentally-conscious, corvette-driving, meat-eating, animal-loving, parent of one, from the wilds of Northwestern New Jersey. Looking for any feedback and general reaction to my first full length literary work. It is not necessary to read from the beginning due to the style, but it does help with some of the references and to get a feel for my overall mental state. Feel free to jump in wherever you like.

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The Year of the Monkey sizzles every headline on the planet as Ho Chi Minh's Tet Offensive tears through the consciousness of America. While the battle for the country rages up and down the countryside at places like Hue, Con Thien, Lang Vei, Khe Sahn, and the Rockpile, two Marines use their daring to create a special reconnaissance force to change the future of their Corps. With long-range reconnaissance critical at this crucial juncture of the war, American units are sustaining devastating losses amongst their elite LRRP teams. South Vietnam is a country being ripped apart by the ambitions of its neighbors and the corruptive nature of its leaders; a place where ethnic hatred fans the flames of war, this time with the security of the United States of America as the ultimate threat. Caught up in the rising storm of a country in dangerous transition, Team Deuce is the eyes and ears of a Corps of Marines being drawn inexorably into a war it cannot win

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Emme is like any other teenage girl—well, except for her annoying habit of surging anything electrical. Her eyes don’t glow, she can’t disappear, and she certainly doesn’t know how to trap someone in midair. Leave that to Tobi, the new boy in her science class. But Tobi’s unexpected appearance and bizarre talents mark him as a Watcher; a group sent to find and destroy anyone with a unique energy signature like Emme’s. There’s just one problem…dangerous as the Watchers might be, an inexplicable force has bonded the two of them together. Now, a separation would kill them both.

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Plum starts our story in jail, the story unfolds, telling the hiliarious and strange story of how she ended up there.

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Not looking for any specifics

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*************PLEASE TAKE NOTE, THIS HAS BEEN ABANDONED FOR THE RE-WRITE******************* (I have performed a major rewrite and changed the title.) This novel involves three lives caught up in the miserable web of slavery. Desperation and vengeance drive the three main characters: Alain Gravois, the son of a fisherman living in Nantes, France, struggles to become his own man; Osawe, a warrior, living in a small village situated between two warring kingdoms along the 'slave coast' of Africa, struggles to survive; and Assad, a moor, and military man, is betrayed by an empire that is being torn apart. France, the 'slave coast' of Africa, Morocco and Haiti are the backdrop to their story which spans twenty-three years, 1727 to 1750. All criticism is welcome.

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In 2157 a relatively non-violent struggle for equal rights between human kind and their intelligent creations becomes a full fledged war.

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16-year-old Katie Smart has always been painfully shy and self-conscious. Her one ambition is to become a professional photographer. Possible romantic interest from Greg, a teenage worker her father hired to keep up the grounds surrounding their New England farmhouse, the increasingly sinister attentions of her photography teacher, and a sudden change of attitude toward her from Ben, the hottest and most arrogant boy in school, combine to send her into an emotional tailspin from which she may never recover. --- FIRST DRAFT IS COMPLETE and I have begun to edit.

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This is my work-in-progress, my first attempt at a novel. All chapters are first drafts, with corrections only made for typos and obvious grammatical errors. I welcome criticism of all kinds:grammatical, style, story, etc. I'm trying hard to tell my story visually, with as little exposition as possible, but if it isn't working, let me know. Thanks.

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A middle aged teacher's life changes dramatically after she is cyber bullied and has to lose weight for health reasons. I have edited the chapter and re-posted it. I hope the formatting is better this time.

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Ophelia and Kempis, orphaned in youth, grow up in the Monastery of the Brotherhood in the beautiful city of Ringell. However, the cold spiritual war is heating up and Abba, their God has called them to service. Fighting a growing affection, Ophelia and Kempis must keep their mission in mind while avoiding Ophedius, The Dark Lord and his 2nd in command, Kidron, as well as the horde of minions that serve them. Little does anyone know how far and afield this adventure will take them, dark and light alike.

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TO RETURNING READERS: I revised the whole angle of the Alex/Romi relationship, giving him more of a personality, vs. just someone who has come-backs. These changes are reflected in as of Ch. 7 and on. Overall it's a little more grown-up as he has a hold on her, but I tried to emphasize humour in the inner thoughts. Also, her writing quest is a much bigger deal. Well, this edit will be back to the Agent and on submission to Publishers sometime in Feb. Thanks to all for online and offline feedback! Will edit for grammar offline. More feedback always welcome. ---------------------------------------------------------- STORY INFO: Should a self-sufficient 26-year-old be forced to sell her soul and cooking skills on IndianMarriage.com? Hell no! She should fight for love! But what if love isn't found after going through tubes of lip-gloss, vodka and wingmen? What if it's found in the place where it can never survive? Ohhh Romi...you are so screwed.

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The strange girl found on the side of the road in Bartelsville, her memory gone, has more connection to the town than she knows. Lainey Monaghan, the one who found her and her eventual friend and protector,tries to help her piece her life back together even as her own life becomes tumultuous after her ex-husband makes a reappearance.

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"THE HIDDEN SCROLL" is a historical fiction on the passion of an Israeli archaeology professor in his search for an ancient scroll written in the time of the second temple of Jerusalem. The novel takes the reader on a ride accompanied by ancient parchments, coins and other artifacts. Parchments history and their discoveries are described as the thriller develops from a cave in the Galilee, a cave in the mountains of Tibet, a monastery, an excavation site in Israel, a basement in Amsterdam, a book in Castilian Spain and a new archaeological site with a dramatic discovery. Some searches encounter interference and obstacles placed by a radical Islamic organization. The novel ends with extraordinary archaeological surprises. It has 83,700 words. “THE HIDDEN SCROLL” targets three niche readers. The prime group includes Jewish readers who love thrillers and who may be familiar with the historical events in the novel. After reading it, they most likely will tell their friends about its evolving events that occur in Jerusalem, Rome, Paris, Buenos Aires, Istanbul and other locations. The second targeted group includes Jewish and Christian readers who are interested in archaeology and history. The archaeological facet of the book is not scientific, but it includes some basics on the evaluation and dating of ancient scrolls and parchments. The third group consists of just thriller lovers. I am looking for constructive criticism to improve the impact of the introductory chapters on the reader's curiosity and his or her interest in reading additional chapters.

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This is the continuation of Destiny The Guardian. It is the story of the Akren-duras and The Child of Light. The villian tormented by his future. The heroine tormented by her past.

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***Updated on 4-22-2009 with edits. Thanks for all the feedback so far!** 19-year-old Diane Macauliffe's dreams are haunted by a walking, talking skeleton--and that's the least of her worries! First, she must survive basic training at Fort Devon's Army Base. With an inspection looming, she and fellow med-tech trainees Jack and Susie have been assigned clean-up duty in Devon's hospital morgue, which is rumored to be haunted. Jack comes up with a plan to smuggle in beer so that they can drink while they work, risking expulsion from the Army if they are caught. The three friends meet Edgar, a creepy janitor with a dark past who often lurks nearby. Edgar becomes trouble when he discovers what the young trainees--who have dubbed themselves "the morgue drinking club"--are up to. Is the morgue really haunted by ghosts, or merely by someone of flesh and blood who wants to keep them away? Diane must also face the thing she is most afraid of--the repressed memory of the way her father died. Along the way, she learns that she is not alone. After all, everyone's afraid of something; some of us are just better at hiding it than others. This is a young adult novel for readers ages 14 and up. I would like feedback on what works in this story and what doesn't, and how it could be made better. I think the characters are solid and I'm happy with the dialogue (however, please feel free to disagree--one agent commented that he thought the female characters sounded too old for 19, but I think their dialogue rings true. I'd be interested to learn what other writers think). I think the plot needs tightening, and I'm concerned that there may be too many times in the book where the characters are just talking--are these scenes boring? Also, I suspect that the plot may need more tension to drive it forward--maybe more creepy scenes with Edgar and Diane? Finally, does the plot go off on too many tangents? Any suggestions and feedback on these and other aspects of the book would be welcome.

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This is the story of a woman whose mistake in the past has unforseen consequences for her life and the lives of several others. In the end facing her past could mean the downfall of one man. But is the restoration of her soul worth the price she might pay?

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My novel "Goodbody" is a mystery which examines the deteriorating financial system in the United States.

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This book explores the curiosity and fearless determination of youth. It takes place long ago and revolves around Kate Powers, a nineteen year old who reluctantly accepts an enchanted package filled with 'tools' to start her on the journey of a lifetime. Her pursuit opens the door to magic, mystery, and a family history she could never have imagined. I am looking forward to and will appreciate any and all feedback.

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When I was 12 I had cancer. To say that this event was life altering would be the grossest of understatements. It became the tilted pole around which my life crazily revolved until many years later when therapy and a loving husband entered my life. The first 3 chapters walk the reader through the day when my disease was discovered and diagnosed and juxtapose it with my introduction to the therapist who helped me bring all those dizzying revolutions to a halt. It is a very personal and - I hope - truthful account of my experience. I am curious to see how other writers will experience it.

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Twin Souls is a young adult novel that centers around Uriah Crowe and Claire Brant. Uriah and Claire are members of the Native American Tewa Tribe. When they approach the Elders of their tribe, according to tradition, to ask permission to marry on tribal lands, their lives quickly spin out of control after being denied because they are not Twin Souls. Twin Souls are two halves of a single soul, separated before birth because the human body cannot contain the true soul. Fearing the couple will runaway, Claire's father poisons her with a concoction given to him by the tribal witch. Desperate to save her life, Uriah must find Claire's true twin soul and risk losing her love forever. I am getting ready to submit this to publishers and agents, and I would really like to get some feedback on style, pace of the story, believeability of the characters, etc. Basically just anything you guys think doesn't work well or could use a little editing. Thanks.

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A novel based on the Author's own true story. It is a story of her enthusiasm pursuing her goal to publish her writing in the US after she moved there, though English was not her mother tongue. She faced many other challenges while achieving her goal. (I appreciate every input I get to help me improve my writing, especially any grammatical mistakes. Thank you)

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Second book, after "My Gioia" (that book is such a mess LOL) Brooklyn 1978: People Gioia (Joy-ah) knew didn’t travel, so she is shocked to hear they were going to Sicily. They arrive at their rich aunt and uncle’s house with high expectations, only to find it’s nothing like they imagined. It was worse. They are poor and living in a crumbling villa. Her mother, who is easily impressed with money, learns the couple gave all their assets away. But to who? And what’s left for her? As Gioia begins to fall in love with her gorgeous cousin, she finds herself struggling with moral concerns. Thanks reading!!!!

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In this one, Nino, a University educated guy returns home to meet his magical grandfather, and the old man taught him something missed out in the world of horror/fantasy. When Nino failed to agree, the old man decided to show him a practical example, which requires them to travel through the ocean for seven days with no breathing tube or underwater goggles. I will love to hear feedback from you. Any feedback. Feel free to give a negative criticism if you wish. Thank you very much in advance.

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Thirteen-year-old Tyler Bradley is sent to stay in Moon Bay at his aunt and uncle's chip shop. Nothing in the antiquated seaside town is what he expected. The chip shop is decorated with strange symbols, there are gigantic, primeval birds nesting in the cliffs and, worst of all, he discovers a sad and horrible story attached to the gothic mansion at the tip of the headland. When Tyler meets skateboarder, Jenner, they join forces to get to the bottom of the mysteries permeating the town. The problem is working out just which townfolk are working for the agents of good and which are working for the agents of darkness. And in this confusing atmosphere, how does Tyler know he can trust his aunt and uncle, after all, their chip shop is called, Wish and Chips... This novel is intended for 10-14 year olds and I would value any feedback, thanks.

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Imagine yourself young, independent, successful; then suddenly swept through time into a future where nothing resembles the past except the granite mountains. You’re plus some unusual senses and appendages and you’ve got nothing of your previous life but a few precious memories, some ill preserved fruits and meager survival gear. And, you’re pregnant. It can’t be anything but a bad dream—a nightmare you’ll wake up from. But you don’t. Ridiculous? Impossible? Well, that is exactly what happens to Katherine Paine in my new novel, Monarch UV3000, when a "mistake" in a genetic research lab inoculates her with a UV serum derived from the cell material of a Monarch butterfly. Like other subjects, Katherine is encased in a chrysalis and emerges in a high cave above the San Joaquin valley, time unmarked accept that the valley is a vast inland sea. Preceded by the others, Katherine arrives among the Dannais, a closely knit tribe of future citizens, to find that she has been identified as the heroine of the society's most pervasive myth. I hope you will enjoy Monarch. I'm looking for feedback on the structure and storyline of this work.

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Ex-New York detective, now Tennessee police chief, Sam Jenkins receives a phone call from a woman he met two years earlier on a case. She tells him a friend needs police assistance. Sam encounters two beautiful ex-hookers looking for a champion and Korean gangsters trying to operate in his quiet, Smoky Mountain community of Prospect. Thanks in advance for your comments and suggestions.

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It should have been a trip up the mountain to bring a long, & painful chapter in Aisha's life to an end. Instead, she found herself in a time and place she could not fathom, because even while there she refused to see it for what it was. There was the enigmatic man with the eagle, there was Brother John with his timeless, yet time-bound papyrus scrolls, feather pens and icon of the Hand of God, and worst of all there was the poignant cry of a baby she could not see. Was she hallucinating, was she dreaming, or God forbid, was she in purgatory? Does this mystical drama keep you turning the pages until Aisha finds out the truth? Please let me also know the truth about what you think -- be specific or general, just tell it like it is. Thank you!

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Dillon Howell is a fifteen year old werewolf living in the suburbs of southern California. He wants to have as normal a life as possible but ends up getting sucked into the supernatural world that exists in the shadows and corners of the real world.

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The second installment in the Of Kings And Gods Trilogy by Christopher S. Ledbetter, Caenus and The Return to Ares' Altar continues the saga of Caenus, Prince of Iolkos, Greece. Caenus returns home from a horrific trial in Neapolis where he nearly perished. He sets his eyes on a new adventure, one of marriage. It seems that his fate and destiny keep getting in the way of his plans. At its core, the Of Kings And Gods Trilogy frames the philosophical question of whether or not our fates and destinies are of our choosing, or are they thrust upon us.

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This is a sequel to my first novel, Shelter Among the Living. In that book, Shannon Baker left her small home town in Texas after high school and never returned. Abused as a child, she then had an abusive marriage. Not until her husband's death did she return to Apache Wells. The Smell of Cedar takes place about a year later; Shannon is more at home now, but still struggling to make peace with her abusive past.

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Plagued with visions that have troubled his entire life, a depressed loner is confronted with their source, another reality hidden just behind the veil of existence.

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A bounty hunter tells his own story as he and his best friend pursue some very dangerous hombres in Arizona during the 1870s. Making the bounty hunter's task more dangerous is the fact that the bad men know that they're being pursued.

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A quiet young Manhattanite who writes children’s stories inadvertently unearths her husband’s biggest secret, one he’ll kill to keep. Suddenly she’s on the run and hiding in northern Vermont with no resources and no one to trust. Two brothers, each struggling to overcome personal heartbreak and family tragedy, take what they think will be a short trip from Boston to Vermont to help their grandfather recuperate from a fall. But the fall shouldn’t have happened, and the young men stay to satisfy their suspicions about why it did. Hiring the frightened New Yorker as a caregiver for their invalid grandpa may not seem like the smartest move to make, especially when their troubles and hers begin to escalate. Yet, as the trio and their other new friends become closer, they find a common resolve to take on and conquer a series of unrelenting external threats. Even more unexpectedly, they each find the individual courage to tackle the ruthless internal demons they brought along with them.

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This is the story of a young person trying to find his way back from the precipice of loss and fear in a world suddenly torn asunder by global conflict, picking his way through the rubble of cities, through the hopes and dreams of his youth, through the dirt paths of childhood -- He may be a child of the Cold War, fantasizing the adult intrigues of espionage, he may be a soldier lost in the images of nuclear inferno, lost in the images of the home which he may never find again... The fires named are the fires of global apocalypse, the fires of memory, the fires of love, the fires of alchemical transformation... The narrative weaves together childhood memories and emotions, sleeping dreams, and the psychic impressions of the future, in a style akin to a Surrealist landscape.

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The territory is the individual; the population: thoughts; populated locations are various states of mind. Rulers of regions are dominant desires. In one particular region, the rulers form a dynasty of powerful desires that drive the individual until creative and perceptual awareness are slaves and descendants of generations of slaves fed on the dregs of frustration. The ruler and leaders dominate ideas and actions through ruthless coercion. One day an idea tore itself from the nothingness of being that the ruler had created and said, “Enough! This mind has had enough!” The deliberately destructive habits, driven by the ruthless ruler, attacked. The fight is fast and intense. And in the lull after the battle, the Spirit and the agitated Flesh has reached an agreement. They are united in the knowledge that there has to be an exodus, and a journey to the Promised Land… The battle effects a transformation in an individual that creates a striking new person. The Call and Development of that person is an exact replay of the Exodus process from the Call and Assignment of Moses through Egypt, the wilderness and into the Promised Land. A thought like Moses enters the region and addresses the ruler and the leaders and demand that the oppressed of the region are to be set free. The process is related to the Biblical account of the Exodus out of Egypt and the journey to the Promised Land. Chronologically, the time is 500 years after Columbus. Geographically the hypothetical state is the locale of the historically fortunate survivors of the dreadful Middle Passage. The hypothetical Egypt, the wilderness and the Promised Land are states of being. In this setting of limitless possibilities, a schoolteacher makes one of the world’s greatest spiritual discoveries since Moses turned aside to see the burning bush. The Exodus Papers, Exodus 500: The First Generation, Copyright 2009 by Glenwood A. Lawrence; Strongest Start Three

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Victorian Conwell, the owner of one of the most successful and unusual businesses on the west coast has her hands, and the hands of everyone she knows, full. A gifted teleporter with a complicated past she finds herself in the middle of a conspiracy that will take her and the members of her corporation all over the globe and into the pits of hell. Follow Victorian as old loves clash with current obligations sending her life into a tailspin the world will never forget.

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Nobody expects much of Tom Fields, a lanky sophomore at Appleton High. Especially Tom Fields. But a suprising circle of friends develop around him, forcing him to engage life more than he ever thought he should.

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A young Queen's kingdom is conquered by the cruelest of brutes and she is forced into hiding. Alianore's only hope in regaining her throne is the help her friends can provide as they travel back and forth between the medieval world of Triad and the contemporary modern day. Any constructive feedback is welcome and appreciated; however, I'm really interested in the readability of the material and whether or not these first three chapters would encourage readers to want to know more.

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The grottos of New York City can be a terrifying place for any twenty-five year old, especially for a recent Ivy League drop-out, especially when you’ve been spoon-fed caviar since the cradle. In his final year at Amherst, Ethan Elliot—privileged heir to the QuikClean dynasty—flees New England, abandons a promising future at a top financial firm and moves into a loft on the outskirts of Williamsburg, Brooklyn in hopes of finding something “greener.” What he finds is anything but. Instead, he’s hurtled far from the boroughs of New York on a life-altering, cross-country, roller-coaster ride into the bowels of Middle America with Jules and Wolfgang, his just-as-lost tour guides, each of them towing their own trunk-full of emotional “drag-age.” They take off in a derelict Chevy Chevelle expecting to find Jules’ deceased biological mother, Lisa; themselves, and the world they once knew. What they don’t expect is to be taken hostage by a schizophrenic family member that none of they have ever met. However, it’s not until they come upon Lisa’s Law: an edict of good will penned by the namesake to “make a long-lasting impression on at least one other life, for the better” that the central theme begins to surface. The Law of Lilies is a character driven, coming of age story about forgiveness, survival, and our redemption as a human race. It takes the reader through Ethan’s slapdash, and often times frightening view of today’s America. But more than simply a story about a character’s fruition; at approximately 60,000 words, it’s a challenge to the reader to make the world a more beautiful place, regardless of the ugliness of one’s past. Thrid round draft. Looking for any advice: creative, technical, what have you.

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My Name is Sadia is the fictional, first-hand account of a young African woman in the Islamic world of the early sixteenth century. Captured as a young girl during a civil war and sold into slavery, Sadia journeys through the most powerful and intriguing Muslim societies of the early sixteenth century: the Mombasa city-state struggling with the ambitions of Portuguese, Medieval Mecca during the hajj, and the Ottoman harem of Sultan Selim the Grim. She struggles to understand who she is really is when new names and identities are repeatedly imposed upon her.

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'The Devil's Game'is a fictional novel that evolves from a sexual misconduct between a Catholic priest and a naive female orphan. The story follows the lives of Charlotte and Merit, two girls who spend their first eighteen years in the care of nuns in a Catholic orphanage. Twelve-year old Charlotte believes Father Frank to be her friend and is drawn into his sexual ritual, which he calls 'the Devil's game.' Charlotte's encounters with Father Frank will affect her choices and relationships for the rest of her life. Meanwhile, Merit struggles with either following the moral lessons taught by the Catholic religion or yielding to Charlotte's powerful, yet destructive influences. Fatefully, Merit was not exposed to 'the Devil's game;' thus, by comparison, hers is the more graceful and natural unfolding into womanhood. A unique sisterly bond holds the two orphans side-by-side throughout their sheltered childhood. However, as adults in the outside world--freed from the limitations of the orphanage--that bond begins to crumble. Contrary to Charlotte's twisted convictions, when Merit meets Jesse Tyson she realizes that love can follow passion and that trust can exist between a man and a woman. Jesse is an enchanting American Indian, noble and humane, and his qualities serve to furthur illiminate Charlotte's dark side. Charlotte's past is utterly scarred and her scorn and jealousy fuel the total disregard she harbors for the sanctity of her sister's wedding vows. Constant conflict, deceit and betrayal will force Merit to choose between her happiness with her husband, Jesse, or her allegiance to Charlotte. And, once severed from Merit,the only good she ever knew, Charlotte's childhood demons surface and push her to the lunatic fringe.

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Gideon is twelve years old. His has a temper. He wishes he didn't have a temper. He doesn't know how not to have a temper. His parents don't know how to help him. In the process of the novel, everyone learns something about temper and tears and strength. The story unfolds within the context of a community story of a church congregation that learns to love theatre; and in the context of spring turning to summer along the Susquehanna River in the imaginary town of Little Bridge. I want to know whether the story works, whether it holds the reader the way the characters and their struggles have held my interest. I want to know how well the subplots support the main story. Is the action tight, does it move fast enough, does the story hold together, do the scenes come to life for the reader.

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Sylvia lives alone, keeping contact with the outside world at a comfortable minimum. Harry, a retired cop turned PI, hates his new career, but needs the cash. Against his better judgement Harry accepts a case to watch the mysterious Sylvia only to find that events have quickly gotten out of hand.

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The San Juan Islands, in the center of Puget Sound, entices visitors looking for a place to get away from civilization for awhile. Jason and Kendra didn't mean to get that far away from their comfortable city life; they were just passing through on the way to a sleep-away date in Canada. Their romantic weekend takes a frightening turn when everyone else on the ferry drops dead. Without a captain the ferry crashes into a rock and sinks. Jason and Kendra find themselves washed ashore on a small island without supermarkets, shopping malls or Starbucks. Thanks in advance for reading and for any feedback you have.

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Would like to know if people find it humorous, how I could improve on it or any feedback you desire

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Set in the fictional town of Blevins, Maine during the mid-1980's, this novel is a blend of ironies, private emotions and public scrutiny;personal desires and professional predicaments. While the title mentions the word children, this book is definitely not kid stuff. the title evolves from the prologue. The four main characters are elementary school teachers whose personal and professional lives become significantly changed in a single academic year. What causes Vera who is ready to retire to vent her anger during a Board of Education meeting with a speech that brings the audience to its feet? What makes Dee quit her job with such dramatic flair, leaving the job she loves to become a corporate trainer down South? What causes Mark to turn down the perfect job offer he's been searching for outside of teaching? What makes him decide to stay? What causes Stu's untimely death? If the questions raised here have sparked a curiosity, then perhaps a full dose of This Business of Children is the next logical step. Vera Harriss, Dee Fletcher, Mark Pettingill, and Stu Martel are waiting to make your acquaintance.

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Here's what I hope is the beginning of the last edit (pre-publishing-wise), so what do you think? Would you check it out at the library? Buy a copy? Are the characters well defined? How's the pacing?

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Summary: Mark flies from Rome to become Australian High Commissioner in Lagos in August 1965, just as violence erupts there, Ian Smith unilaterally declares independence for Rhodesia and “Winds of Change” continue to sweep through Africa. A military coup, for which “six Ibo majors” are blamed, overthrows the Federal Government of Nigeria in January 1966, killing the Prime Minister, a celebrated Muslim leader in the north and others, mostly northerners, to the apparent advantage of the Ibos. In July, the northerners take their revenge in a counter coup and savagely massacre thousands of Ibos. A million Ibo refugees flee to their homeland in the Eastern Region. Mark mediates between new head of government Gowon and charismatic leader of the Ibos, Ojukwu. As the world media watch, Mark talks to Ojukwu in his capital Enugu, raising hopes of a peaceful settlement. Mark travels to other African countries talking to their heads of government; but “things fall apart”. Ojukwu declares an independent state of Biafra, civil war breaks out and “brother” fights “brother.” Most Great Powers support Gowon with arms and supplies. Disease, starvation, bombing and military action kill a million Ibo men, women and children. The OAU, the Commonwealth and the United Nations do little but watch the genocidal-style slaughter. At the United Nations in New York, Mark is helpless. Ojukwu’s army surrenders in January 1970. Biafra dies, others plunder its oil in ways that corrupt the country and destroy traditional industries. In 1973, Mark returns to Nigeria on a “Goodwill Mission”. He meets Gowon again. Peace reigns. Biafra is only a memory – an especially bitter memory to Ibos who still suffer oppression and discrimination. The world takes little notice. It has other worries, other conflicts, other crimes and corruptions in which some can selfishly rejoice and to which others must grudgingly attend… Feedback: Comment/criticism of any kind welcome, including comment on content, literary quality and readability.

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When a high-tech heavyweight moves to Southern California to distance himself from a personal tragedy and falls for a television star whose fiancé is running for governor, events spin out of control and he learns that staying alive is the first step on the road to redemption.

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Jessica if fleeing her psychopathic husband. Along with her seven year old daughter Meagan, she decides to start a new life in the small town of Hope Springs, Oklahoma. The only problem is a pack of werewolves are secretly killing people in the area. Ebon Moon is a chilling novel of werewolf terror.

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This is the story of how one man comes to grips with personal tragedy and its meaning for him. The protagonist, Jim Reynolds, flees to a fishing village in Maine and lives with an elderly aunt. In Maine he meets a young widow, Karen, and they become friends. Eventually he returns to Virginia to pick up the pieces to his life and takes a job doing 'opposition research' for a political campaign. His success is the downfall of an opposing candidate, and Jim eventually is rewarded with a job in the governor's office, where he specializes in behind-the-scenes politics. He returns to Maine for his aunt's funeral and renews his acquaintance with Karen. He struggles to accept the tragedy but at last comes to grips with it in a way that severs his ties to the world of politics and helps him begin a new life.

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A journey inside the soul's storyteller

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"Little Evil" is the story of Jake. He hasn't had an easy, or normal life. His dad is an old-school union electrician, moving from job to job, town to town. Jake stopped trying to make friends because he couldn't keep friends. They were always left behind, in the last town. Each new town brought new schools. And new bullies. Bullies that looked at a new kid in school and saw an opportunity to hone the special skills that every bully needs. That was bad enough, but his parents drank. More than parents should. To top everything off, Jake killed a man when he was eleven. It seemed like the right thing to do, and he was sure that the man deserved to die and that if he didn't kill him, the man would do bad things. But still, that's not normal for an eleven year old. Jake suffers from empathy. He sometimes feels what others feel. But it's more than that. Sometimes, Jake's empathy gives him insight into a person. Sometimes that insight compels him to do something. Sometimes Jake has to take a stand against the little evil that lives in our schools and our neighborhoods. "Little Evil" spans regions: the plains of Oklahoma to the suburbs of Los Angeles to the mountains of Washington. It spans eras: the late fifties through the early seventies. It is a fictional story, but is deeply personal in that it reflects some periods and portions of my own life. What those periods and portions might be are left for the reader to guess.

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Almost five years ago a group of rogue vampires decided that they were tired of living in the dark and wanted fame, power, and most importantly to finally be able to live without fear. So they went public and “outed” themselves and all other supernatural and preternatural creatures. As a response to the world wide panic, the world’s governments brought to light their own secret; the existence of superhuman hunters. Soon a war between humans and “others” began. A few forces were able to see the futility in the fighting and obtained permission to create a paranormal crime fighting unit that would pull all forms of beings together to fight all supernatural evil. However, there are forces on all sides seeking to see the test group fail. Torn between loyalty to their respective groups and maintaining safety and justice, the crime fighting team, along with one of the city’s ADA of Supernatural Violent Crimes, fights a new enemy that may threaten to end the team and tear the paranormal community apart. I'd like any feedback that you believe could help get my writing noticed by an agent and later publisher. Particularly from the first chapter or two.

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Contemporary novel with a lot of historical elements from the time of the Habsburg rule of Austria. In involves romance, intrigue, and murder.

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Pulled away from her stylish Manhattan life by her parents, Arrabella refuses to accept the tiny town of Grainer as her new home. Drug out of her room by her mother and enlisted to help sort photos that fell out of their albums during the move, Arrabells stumbles onto the picture of a dead aunt she never knew existed. Her father refuses to discuss his dead sister any more than to say she died as a teenager and he blames himself for her death. When other questions about the girl who looks strangely similar to Arra are ignored, she goes back to the photos. She quickly finds more and more pictures of female relatives who died young and all share her silver-green eyes and raven black hair. Arra comes to realize that something is very wrong with her family line. I'm looking for feedback on typos and places where I could add to the story. Completed it only reached 35000 words, which is a little short for YA. Thanks

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Summary: In this tongue-in-cheek, countermand to "money's everything," a rhetoric professor stands to lose one million dollars if she can’t shed ten kilo, a ceramicist-nee-chemist tries to get accredited as a psychologist, a glass-eyed oncologist works to make empirical sense out of Furrydom, a python sucks down a horse whisperer, and a simple barkeep earns a fortune selling peanut putter and jelly-covered sushi. From Catalina Islands’ ferry captains, to anatomically correct East Village marzipan, to Junior Leaguers intent on killing all Illinois highway meridians’ beneficial weeds, this book keep rocking. In the end, the gal who paints New England landscapes on leather purses marries the dude with the waxed mustache, a weepy sort is bequeathed a Chicago penthouse, and a media crew gets a surprise trip to Maine. From the moment that the main character receives her windfall until the last page of this tale, moral lessons, covered in a thick layer of hilarity, Mr. Philllips’, the pot-pourri cat’s sensibilities notwithstanding, ensue. Feedback desired: primarily: plot, diction, character development. Secondarily: dialogue, setting inconsistencies, mechanics.

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On an impulse, 20 year old Riley Matthews follows her best friend’s advise and joins her at The Squeaky Hinge Bar and Grill for some much needed fun in a life that had become dull and routine. How could that one act turn the events in her life around so drastically? Within days, Riley is thrown into a tangled web of money, men and murder. Searching for love, confronting her past and terrified for her life, there is only one person that can save her… Tulips in the Sand is the first of the mystery series featuring Riley Matthews. Feedback on the characters and overall storyline would be greatly appreciated.

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This is a novel about the adventures of a family of five who are banished from a town made of diamonds, after the youngest girl, Benya, loses a cooking contest. The three children and their parents travel down the mountain and fend off many enemies. They also have adventures in another world, Anithonia, where copies of them appear, so two families that are exactly the same will fight to survive in two different worlds. Benya will become the necessary hero, as the two worlds face their most destructive enemy yet: people from our world in search for diamonds.

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When Leland Garner went to Georgia to meet his future wife, he didn't expect to meet a 16 year old girl. But as he gets to know more about her, he is drawn into her world of pain. They marry and enjoy a happy life together. His death 19 years later brings back his son, Gregory, home. He and Maddelyn learn that Leland has left them his country and a last birthday present. A present that leads them back to her past. A past that they go to extract revenge for the wrong done to her.

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Jill Hardman uses the ancient bush remedy of swallowing three red seeds to bring on a miscarriage in an effort to save her career in the mining industry. During the seven day wait for the remedy to work her resolve begins to wane.

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As a people we profess to want someone to solve our problems, to bring us peace and heal our wounds. But what would really happen if that someone actually appeared in our midst? Would we welcome him or not? I am re-publishing this story under a new title for the Strongest Start Three.

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This is the story of my great-grandfather and his family. He supported himself and his brother by playing the piano in the silent movie theaters when he was 13, and lived in downtown Chicago in a time when the architecture was artistic and there were parks on every other block.

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Jillian's preparing for her wedding and trying not to think about her doubts. When she discovers the personal belongings of a well-known non-fiction writer in her parents' basement, she welcomes the distraction of trying to track her down. When she finds the woman's journal, with personal thoughts that mirror Jillian's own doubts, her search for the disappeared woman intensifies. With the help of her artsy cousin Angel, and her outspoken coworker Will, Jillian investigates the mysterious woman and the connection she has to Jillian's family.

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A novel about telepathy, reincarnation and eternal love. Takes place in Hollywood 1975 and New Orleans 1895. I have just re-written the first chapter and would appreciate any comments.

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Tristen Spencer is a journalist. Not just any journalist, but an undercover investigative reporter, and one of the best in the business. He's young, successful, and appears to be untouchable, until he gets an assignment that has entirely too many personal scars attached to allow him to remain comfortably smug. Inspired by "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest", a recent film I worked on, and the music of Mich Gerber, it is still a work in progress and may change numerous times. Thanks for taking the time to read, and I appreciate any useful feedback you choose to give me. Enjoy!

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Twenty-five year old Rebekkah Gelles is a talented artist in love with her husband, Jacob. Fulfilled looking after their Park Slope home and working part-time at the Geller & Bender funeral home Jacob owns with his best friend, Mark Bender, Rebekkah’s life would be perfect if not for the lack of children in her seven year marriage. The last thing Rebekkah expects is to be estranged from Jacob because of his stance on infertility testing and treatments, in conflict with her adoptive parents over finding her birth parents, investigating Mark’s apparent criminal behavior, and fighting her attraction to a handsome Italian police detective. Her life soon has more complications than she can handle.

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This work rewrites the story of the vampire told through the eyes of a dissaticfied woman who has to decide which life she wants more ... her calm everyday mon-fri 9-5 tv dinner, but no real action life ... or a life seeped in intrigue, travel, art, love, and blood; but soon she questions if the choice was ever hers.

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Unable to shake the memory of his past, while wrestling with the effects of his wife's illness,a Brooklyn man searches for the truth. Whether or not his world collapses depends solely on those he trusts the most.

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Everyone who goes to college reaches the point where it's time to put something other than a degree on their resume, which is where an internship comes into play. Lindy Renoir, a student at MassArt, decides to intern at the National Gallery in London, restoring paintings. Within weeks of her departure from the states, one event flips everything in her life upside down. A story about emotional devastation, hope, mental and spiritual growth, and overall, human interaction, "Kensington" is filled with colorful characters who will stay with you even after you close the book. I am a first time novelist, and would appreciate any and all helpful advice, wether it be related to plot, grammar, or finding an agency to represent my work. Thank you for taking the time to read some of my work!

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This is a novel currently in progress. It is about a man and his struggle to learn how to overcome the tragedies of his past and his fear of people. It is a journey seen through the characters perspective and it has a raw and intimate tone.

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Waxing and Waning is a hideously dark comedy about an eighty-three-year-old serial killer. Paddy randomly molds herself into the stories of novelists, script-writers and the evening news. Taking on the roll of the victims, she seeks remuneration from anyone who slightly resembles the villains, making them suffer her own inappropriate, if not inconvenient truth. I have hard skin. I love criticism, lay in on me. Always looking for grammatical issues, cuts suggested moving the story along, POV errors, and tense issues. Thank you...

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A story that brings nature to life-- Just a side note. you will be lost if you don't start at chapter one... they are fairly short reads. Thank you for stopping by. All NITS and feedback are greatly appreciated!

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Having just been killed in a mysterious shuttle explosion, Gethin Bryce is back to figure out why. Bryce is an unusually gifted investigator with the Global Republic; due to his proximity to the shuttle tragedy, he finds himself assigned to the case. Bryce's investigation takes him from the luxurious enclaves of Earth’s elite to the battered Wastelands beyond civilization’s protective thrall. Linking up with a planet-spanning corporate powerhouse, he also befriends a grim outlander named Celeste Segarra. She has an important piece of the puzzle – proof of a sadistic entity from Earth's unremembered past which threatens not just civilization, but all life... Everywhere.

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STARSPEAKER is a historical fiction novel which begins against the backdrop of ancient China during one of the most brutal reigns in China's long history. It is a tale of civilization, serendipity, and individuals and is divided into five "scrolls" or units. Thanks, and please enjoy!

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This is a rewrite of the Soul of Fire - Soul of Ice novel I've posted earlier (that version is now removed, as I've changed too much for them to be considered the same story). Let me know what you think. I've changed some of the setting and some of the characters. I've also shortened some of the chapters. A witch is forced to go undercover at the local vampire coven, to try to figure out who is behind the turning of powerful witches and other magical beings into vampires. Can she overcome her hate of vampires long enough to learn to trust her companion Lucas? Will she discover the mystery behind the turnings before it is too late?

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My life didn't turn out as expected.

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Detective Senior Sergeant Susan Prescott, accompanied by one of her twin daughters, Marli, is on holiday. Susan is taking extended leave after a series of traumatic happenings rock her life. The spelling is Australian English.

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In the new Russia of 1993, control of nuclear weapons has collapsed. Detente is in play, but powerful people in Russia and the U.S. want the Cold War back and are prepared to go to extreme lengths to get what they want. Terroists take advantage of the situation resulting in Boston threatened by a nuclear detonation. Two enemy agents, Robert Fox and Vasily Ivanov, struggle to overcome mutual mistrust, unravel the plots, avoid a female assassin and the FBI's Naomi Rothstein, and stop the detonation and a U.S. attack on the Middle East. All feedback is welcome.

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Jacob Lumin thinks he knows everything about the world. He has turned to Evangelical Christianity and the U.S. Army for all the answers he needs. Under love and suffering, he loses this faith and approaches other perspectives. Throughout this evolution, he has multiple prejudices which only serve to foreshadow his future. The result is an exposition on societal stereotypes when the discriminator becomes the discriminated.

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Book 1---***---------- I have posted the complete book 1---***----------please review any chapter ---***------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Set in the first part of the fifty-first century. It takes place in a parallel universe, with Earth as the capital of the MilkeyWay Gallixc, one of three Gallixcs in the United Federation of Gallixcs (UFG). ---***--- The 1st MilkeyWay Fleet part of the UFG had lost the opening battle in the war with the Canis Gallixc Peoples Union of Planets Fleet (CG-POP). ---***--- Admiral Don Kinley needs his group to find out how and why his 1st MilkeyWay forces lost before the Zokkns counter attacked. ---***--- The Zokkn people who live by the Book of Zokk are in an internal war. Ge JokS, the High Leader of the CG-POP is corrupt. The opposition led by Ie YooS is trying to overthrow him. ---***--- Federation spy network, run by Ron Pits, has uncovered the true reason why the Federation lost the battle, but more importantly how they can win the war. ---***--- Jump in anywhere, but if you really want to know whats going on you need to start at the begin - please I need any and all reviews

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Drim drags his friend Regis into a bounty hunt that earns them the attention of the local magistrate. Reluctantly, they are forced into service for the king, starting down a road that will prove their world's oldest myth true, and decide the fate of the last humans in the universe.

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A sadistic serial killer is stalking men in Kansas City and Nicole, a troubled forensic psychologist, reluctantly agrees to assist in the case. Once in Kansas City, she is forced to work with Detective Scott Hayes, once her lover and partner on the force. As she gets more deeply involved with the case, Nicole begins having the same recurring dreams she had as a child. As the dreams become more detailed, Nicole starts feeling that they are somehow connected with the case. Nicole has no idea how connected she is until she is confronted by the killer and is forced to make a decision that forever changes her life. As usual, all feedback is greatly appreciated. I am very interested in work use and sentence structure, transitions, awkward places, flow and if the story held your interest.

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A young woman tries to untangle herself from the complications of her mother's life after her mother commits suicide. She finds this difficult to do, however, when she and her brother discover an adopted sibling. As truths about her mother's life become clearer, Melissa struggles to make sense of her own choices.

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Everybody's got their reasons, but when Sophia Bynum finds herself on the receiving end of tragedy, deception, and betrayal, she will question everybody's reasons, including those of family and friends, as well as her own. With courage and determination, Sophia comes face to face with a reality she never knew existed. Or is it a reality she'd purposely kept hidden from herself for reasons she can't remember?

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This novel is about an abused woman seeking help in leaving her husband. She meets a new man who treats her well and they fall in love, but there is a twist to the novel that I would prefer not to give away. I would love any feedback anyone is willing to provide, and consider it an honor to have other writers explore my work on this site.

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Title? Content? Development of story line? Clarity of writing?

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Okay, I am going to try to give this a run again after taking a nine month break which resulted in a forey into humor writing. This is the third time I have changed my opening chapter. I need to know if this hooks you or not. Any ideas and nits are appreciated. Happy Reading, Lost Soul

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“Irish twins” is a slang description of two children born to the same mother within twelve months. Some consider it a highly offensive term.

The origin isn’t certain, but it is a distinctly American term referring to Irish-American families. It's suspected roots date back to the 1800’s Potato Famine era, when approximately one million Irish came to North America. They often arrived penniless and were considered uncultured, uneducated and dirty—a pox on good society. Unskilled workers who made as little as eight cents a day back in Ireland could earn a dollar a day in America. This caused resentment from American workers fearful of losing jobs and being undercut by the Irish. In Eastern cities such as New York and Boston, signs reading “Irish Need Not Apply” sprung up in store windows. Several derogatory terms followed. For example, “Irish confetti” for thrown bricks and “Irish kiss” for a slap. Irish twins fits into this vernacular.

The term Irish Twins mocks the fertility of Irish Catholic families and their disdain for practicing birth control methods, while failing to plan ahead or control themselves sexually. It also may suggest that the Irish didn’t understand the true medical definition of twins, or two children conceived and born together.

Like the parents of twins or other multiples, parents who have Irish twins face the challenges of having two young children at one time. As the children grow up, parents encounter the difficulties of medical and extracurricular activity expenses, and the simultaneous payment of college tuition fees. On the positive side, since the space between Irish twins is so small, it intensifies the sibling bond, and Irish twins often end up being very close and affectionate with one other.

Or not.

This is the life story of Irish Twins, Jennifer and Catherine, also known as Jenny and Caylie. Close as children, their relationship begins to fall apart when their parents abandon them at the ages of 17 and 18. They work at finding their way back to one another, developing an even stronger bond as adults. And then shortly after their mother dies, they veer off in opposite directions. Their mother, Anne, who was also an Irish Twin, is the behind-the-scenes soul of this tale. Although she has passed away, she is ever present in the ongoing lives of her daughters. She keeps watch over Jenny and Caylie as well as her three additional children, and through her we learn a lot about life. And about death. This is a first draft and I'm experimenting with format. I welcome all feedback to see what works and what doesn't.

ATTENTION: If you're new to this story, please begin with chapter 1. THANK YOU.

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When your BFF is bitten by a vampire; 'being there' for them suddenly becomes a greater challenge than you could ever imagine. ((This is one of my many 'starts'; a story that begins with a powerful friendship. I'm not always sure where I'm going to go with my stories, I'm an 'organic' writer; but I do like the tone of this start. I intend to add two more chapters before the contest deadline.))

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The world is ending. The signs are evident. Desperation and fear have infiltrated every level of life. Henry can feel it coming. His fellow math teacher has figured out the date through a complex mathematical formula involving the length of a 1964 pinto multiplied by the average bust size of all playmates from 1985 through 1995. Henry’s wife has returned with a message from the The Pastor: God is angry. His son has built his own world in the basement with milk cartons and thousands of pictures of strangers. His dad is dying. It’s Christmas. He’s been torturing eighth grade bullies who tortured fellow students. The world is ending.

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How many attributes can a character have that will expose the prejudices of everyone attending his shipmate's wedding? Jason Beckman, an enlisted, Native American war hero standing for his division officer, Benny Bancroft, at an old-money New England wedding will find few guests who accept him as an equal. Jason doesn't want to be there to start with, but acquieces to Benny's demands because, well, Benny doesn't seem to have a friend in the world.

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You would do anything to stop the fire, if it was you who was on fire.

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Please provide constructive criticism and/or whether or not you enjoyed what you read.

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On the world of Guya… In an age of darkness… A time when the Inquisition raged and the Church of the All Father sent Inquisitors and Witch Hunters into the lands to burn witches. One such witch was named Sundra. Sentenced to death by fire, she escapes her fate with the aid of a mysterious swordsman named Jorn. Together they must forge a bond as Sundra takes the oath to be the next Oathbearer and wield the powerful Sword of Balance to destroy the church and save the world from an ancient and unholy evil.

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Ruled by Darkness the world is a dangerous place to live. A human woman finds herself transported from earth and ends up in this world. How did she get there? How will she be able to leave? But more importantly, why was she brought there?

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I am writing the story from two prospectives, hers and his. I want feedback on what is good or bad, mechanics, basically everything. The first part is their kind of introduction to the story and then starts the story 14 months ago...the first time they see each other after 3 years apart. His brother is marrying her best friend. There might be a few sections in the story that are told twice, once from each point of view, but not many.

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Attorney Martin Gray exists in a blanched world of dehumanizing distractions – where individuals are identified by brand names and actor look-alikes; where relationships are forged with rental cars, plastic in-boxes and mechanized paper shredders; where being among others is the greatest isolation. When über-retailer Arcadia, Incorporated calls upon Martin to advise the firm on an executive-level legal issue, he discovers a world of corporate greed, excess and scandal that shocks him out of his sapless existence. After unsuccessfully confronting Arcadia’s management, he flees to an island paradise with Evie Base, the much younger wife of Arcadia’s CEO. When Evie returns to the United States without Martin, events unfold that challenge his most fundamental beliefs about relationships, love and self-worth; about what it means to be human. In terms of feedback, my expectations are wide open - anything is fair game.

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Born human in a world of darkness, Nicolai held a secret longing to be his father's son. Now, four hundred years after his death, he is still the outcast, a danger to all he holds dear. In the search for a way out of his cursed existance, Nicolai may find his destiny. All reviews and comments are very welcome.

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Any and all comments or suggestions are welcome.

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Things are not always black and white, sometimes they are the color of love.

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The United States Air Force has contracted American Aerotechnics, a private jet builder with a lot of resources, with the extraordinary feat of building the fastest, most advanced spy plane in the world. With complete project success just around the corner, Jim (Agent Stroker) is tasked by the International Intelligence Agency to make the jet disappear; it is much too advanced and will surely upset the stability of the world no matter who is in control of the sophisticated piece of aeronautical ingenuity. Through inside channels, the Libyans and Russians are aware of the jet and desperately want to gain control of it. Plans for selling the jet are made, sending Agent Stroker to certain death if he succeeds with his mission. This new fiction spy novel sets the stage for a new spy series with intriguing characters and a powerfully suspenseful plot that will keep you wanting more! I'm looking for constructive feedback to improve my story and to help put the final touches to my first fiction novel.

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A truly remarkable tale of love and endurance through the battles and struggles of the world’s best loved King -Arthur, as he strove to bring peace and prosperity to Britain by stopping the incessant in-fighting and uniting the country against the Saxon hordes. Laying the foundations of a better way of life for his people and the country that would last for many years. A man of passion and foresight, a born leader and diplomat who devoted his life, and eventually gave it, as he battled against internal strife and the ever present Saxon threat. He continued the task that Uther had started, but he was a far better King than his father, their characters differed greatly. Arthur was a man of the people and for the people, seeking to ease their burden in life and to be proud of their heritage, working together for the benefit of all. As King he let it be widely known that he was approachable by anyone, whatever their rank and station in life and would seek to resolve their problems or mediate on their behalf. Young or old they were all of equal importance in his eyes, the young because they were the future of his country and the old for their wisdom and advice. No stone was left unturned as he sought to bring his vision into reality, admitting that he was only human and would make mistakes, but he would quickly learn from them. A great exponent of ‘service to others, before service to self,’ that contributed much to his success throughout his life. The tension is there as this remarkable young boy, turned King, left his mark on history as he pursued his destiny with compassion and total commitment, losing his wife Gwenhwyfar in the process. He could not have done it alone, and in this respect much was due to Merlin and the other Elders that secretly prepared him for his life as High King, and continued to advise him until the end. His sword Excalibur, given to him by the Lady of the Lake, gave him the protection that he needed, put fear into the hearts of his enemies and aided him in many mystical ways. This is a magical insight into his real life as it happened, not just another mystical fantasy. I feel as if I knew him well. Enjoy the story. ................. All comments are welcome

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Like the Night Blooming Cereus, does love only bloom once and if you miss it, you miss it? Brian Ocean would say, “Even if you don’t see it, it still blooms.” Ocean’s power is a story that mirrors the love of two people against the unpredictable behavior of the ocean itself. Love cannot be controlled and one unexpected wave can change your life. Ocean's power is a story about the friendship and love of two people who have known each other since high school. Brian makes a bad decision that changes the course of both their lives and they are separated by the one thing Sandy admires most about him, his morality. I'd like any feedback you'd like to give me. I'm open to all your thoughts. Thank you.

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This is a group of stories from my past. They are mostly tragic. I'm not really looking for feedback, just wanted to post them. They were written more for therapy than anything else.

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Gioia (Joy-ah) got Karl Baron’s attention. She’s hot, young and gorgeous, a perfect match for movie star royalty like Karl, but is he willing to wait in line with all the men in Gioia’s colorful life? With her first screenplay ready to roll, Gioia travels to her grandparent’s hometown in Sicily. All the problems she left there twelve years ago, come back to haunt her. And some new troubles follow her there.

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Part one.

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I'd like to know if you feel it is for a particular age group? Do you think a spiritual meaning is coming through to you? I'm open to any feedback you want to give to me.

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Johnnites is a thriller/ horror dealing with the eternal struggle between good and evil. But what have a young writer, a mythical being and a serial killer have in common and can they stop the evil lord before he claims the earth for himself.

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Salve Regina follows Regina Mace over the two weeks following her mother's death as she retraces the previous twenty years of her life and finds herself allowing her past to finally permeate, affect, and change her future. It deals primarily with love, betrayal, depression, forgiveness, and the eventual breaking down of mental barriers and a potential rebirth. I call it psychological fiction, since it deals with a lot of interior monologue and self-analysis. It is highly description- and dialogue-driven, and hinges hugely on the past relationships and interactions between the characters.

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ELECTRICITY CITY is a sequel to THE ANGELS (628pp, Book Surge, Dec. 2007). Inspector Richard Allard, acting director of the Surete du Quebec's organized crime squad, travels to Qingdao, China for a conference on the international operations of so-called biker gangs. Disfigured in one of what appear to be co-ordinated assassinations in China and Canada that almost wipe out the senior managers of the squad as well as Richard's family, he seems to recover after a long set of surgeries. To protect his life, Allard's death is announced. When he actually disappears, the Chinese Public Security police seem confounded yet privately unconcerned. They have problems of their own. There appears to be a internal coup d'etat in the planning stage that will return China to a purer political state. And somewhere near the Russian-Chinese border, a terrible revenge is being plotted by a mysterious figure who will not be denied one last chance to make his life count.

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Not looking for any specifics.

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Moonlight Montecristo is the incredible story about an average family guy named Jack Bennett, a husband, father and history teacher and USAF Veteran with connections in the intelligence community. Jack unexpectedly finds himself in the middle of a secret underground Anti-Castro assassination plot, partly due to his love for cigars. Moonlight Montecristo is a story about murder and adventure that takes Jack from Massachusetts to Montreal and from Miami and to the shores of Baracoa, Cuba. It’s a story of a friend’s loyalty, revenge and a mother’s redemption. Beautifully written as the story weaves the reader through time, intrigue and adventure. A truely shocking ending that will captivate you. A story that you will never forget.

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In the allegoric tradition of Watership Down and Animal Farm, Memoirs of a Mallard is a fable, the story of Marlow, a very sympathetic, soulful and ordinary duck. Though others are braver, stronger and less racked by angst, it is Marlow who feels compelled to take action when civil unrest begins to make life on Cambry Reserve impossible for his family and clan. Though his actions often have unanticipated and tragic consequences, Marlow struggles on, battling his fears, otters, human hunters, pagan zealots, the death of loved ones, and more until after a final crisis he figures out that his redemption lies not in rescuing the fallen but in the courage to surrender to divine authority, and thereby to return to the honesty and purity of the ordinary. He needs to be saved himself before he can make any difference in the world. Literary allusion is plentiful in the book, with particular deference to Proust and Attar's medieval epic, Conference of the Birds. Expected number of chapters: 22

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Enjoy and perhaps learn, that's all I hope for, Marc

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A third person limited story of a successful business woman in the new york banking world. And her daughter, an environmentalist and poet. The book is largely stream of consciousness, pulling on modernist techniques. It veers between concrete and poetic language and between past and present. The story takes place in a day. There are two layers to this story - Will Sara meet her daughter again. And a critique of what it means to be a successful woman and person.

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How People Are.

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David Larson is well on his way to becoming one of the world’s most celebrated novelists. What neither David, nor anyone else knows is that he is no ordinary best-selling author. At the start of his career, the similarities between the events described in his books and those that followed in real life were abstract and hard to spot. But as his fame flourished, the parallels became undeniable. Each new book, while boosting David’s popularity, portrays the world as an increasingly volatile place dominated by fanaticism, social chaos and addiction to technology. The real world, in turn, seems to follow David’s vision into a dark and perilous future. Absorbed in the unprecedented growth of a highly virulent web-based social network, most are too wrapped up in their day-to-day, minute-to-minute obsessions to pay much attention to the danger looming on the horizon. Hope rests with a precious few individuals gifted with a heightened awareness of the approaching upheaval. Elijah and Violet, an unlikely duo recruited for their unique talents, must stop this cataclysmic process before it reaches a point of no return. Armed with just the barest information, they will learn to understand their task as they learn to understand one another. Finding the doomsday author is only the first step. To succeed they will need to face the brotherhood that has kept the world in balance since the dawn of civilization, and learn the true nature of The Book of Books.

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This novella is about a woman coping with her sister's terminal illness. Her emotional journey if full of tender moments and occasional happiness, guaranteed to warm your heart. [There are a total of 14 chapters.]

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This is the tale of janitor Adam Fink's foray into the world of psychotherapy when he hijacks his own psychiatrist's practice when his doctor goes on an extended sabbatical. This is a slapstick, sometimes sarcastic look at the world of psychiatry from the eyes of the doctor. Come in have a couch and watch as a not too bright Janitor bocomes a doctor overnight. Watch as he and his partners, a hooker and a lawyer take the world by storm. I would like to know how this rates on the funny scale, 1 being not funny at all and 10 being hillarious. If you have any ideas on how to improve this I am all ears. Thank you for stopping by, and happy reading. Lost Soul

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Blood Moon is the purported memoir of Pontius Pilate's spymaster, bagman and political fixer, the outrageous and flamboyant Artemidorus Scipio. He narrates his version of events during the Gospel period in the Roman province of Judaea including his deadly encounter with Jesus and other events he regards as far more important - such building an Aqueduct and seducing a certain Jewish Princess.

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I love Agatha Christie. One of the best crime writers that ever existed, if not the best. I wanted to write one similar to hers in style. As usual, my first chapter begins with the death of the victim, the second chapter introduces the main character, and the third, the crime scene. An old lady burns to death in her bed. Dr. Moses A. Russel, a noted Roman Empire historian forced to take a job as a police constable in order to provide for his family, is assigned to the case with his senior officer, Henry Marsh. As the locked-room puzzle unravels and secrets unfold, the two detectives are left with a psychological conundrum that will leave them haunted.

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When Angel Lafayette, a female Lieutenant of mixed race in the US Air Force, volunteers for a top-secret DARPA time travel experiment, she expects to be fast forwarded five minutes in 2008 not sent hurtling to a distant time. Before long she is in trouble, in love and history (as we know it) is gone with the wind.

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This is the sequel to 'The Grateful Undead: They're so Vein. Susan and her immortal team find themselves searching for a Vamp-gator, ass deep in immortal animals again. But Human bodies keep showing up in their path, making it clear something much more evil than a gator sporting fangs is at large. Susan and Christopher team up, leading the rest of the group into one hell of a mess when Dorius is once again after their cute little immortal butts. Their only hope of stopping a very deadly woman and the sorcerer that controls her, is a very colorful demon, named Raphael. They strike a deal with the demon, and lose more than they bargain for. I have hard skin. I love criticism, lay in on me. Always looking for grammatical issues, cuts suggested moving the story along, POV errors, and tense issues. Thank you...

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This story is based on historical events. The characters have been created to simulate what actually occurred. I would like to know if the writing is convincing.

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This is a story I am writing for my son. Xochiel is an average fifteen-year-old teenager. She's depressed, she's failing English, and her mother keeps taking her cell phone away because she talks all hours the day with her boyfriend. Oh, two weeks ago, she learned she had super speed. And, her super hearing is making her insane. Average, right?

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I have been meaning to write a book. That is, I want to write a book. The story nags at me to be written as it writes itself in my head. I just have no voice to get it onto paper. I lost it, my voice, not the paper. I know this because I have lots of paper, and I once heard my voice, but not lately. My voice once clacked from a typewriter years back in college. It sang the song of a story, written not long after dropping the fourth or fifth Long Island Ice Tea at a bar, who’s name I no longer remember. I think it was the story who dropped the glass and not me, as I recall, it was the story who distracted me. It sang out of obligation to the deadline of a class I had to pass. My head ached the next day as I read the story to the class. I remember the discussion of all the things the class had to say, the things they saw, what the characters were thinking...I did not put those into the story. They were already in the class's heads. When asked to explain the main character’s actions...I replied, "That is what he had to do, he is who he is, It is his voice, not mine." Just stop by and read -- thash it, bash it, flay it open. I am here to finish it and make it better.

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Lisa Kaamp operates a small childcare business out of her home in the sleepy little town of Nogeksum, Michigan. Highly respected and known for going the extra mile for her daycare kids, Lisa thought she had handled every daycare emergency possible. But nothing prepared her for the nightmare she now faced. Lisa awakes one morning to find herself bound and gagged, four strange men in her home, and the daycare children being held hostage in the next room. Terrorized by her captors as the authorities work to meet the ransom deadline, she tries negotiating with the men for the release of the children, and soon realizes that at least one of them has no intention of letting anyone go. With the deadline quickly approaching, Lisa must do the unimaginable to protect the children and get everyone out alive.

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Dumped by his girlfriend and betrayed by his father, slacker Rudie Chikauski spins into a summer odyssey on the island of Nantucket where run-ins with freaky locals and a love affair with an older woman teach him to become the man he’s never had the courage to be - himself.

Rudie outsmarts a misguided carpenter and a salty Public Works supervisor to earn the painting contract at the island rest home. He also earns the love of Jule, the Home’s laundress, who has her own challenges to face including a distant husband, a fortieth birthday, and an illness she can’t fight alone.

With the help of three friends and the Home’s resident elders, Rudie matures with the summer coming face-to-face with rival painters, proud nudists, raging bonfires, serious crunchers (big waves), and potential death by crucifix. At summer’s end, he makes a decision that will complete his transformation and point the way to new beginnings.

Thanks for looking in!

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There is nothing either fundamentally good, nor anything fundamentally evil: Everything is relative... --The Marquis de Sade, The 120 Days of Sodom. The Wisdom of Repugnance is a dark comedy exploring the individual 'moral compass', and that internal shudder that we are all 'supposed' to have that helps us differentiate between, say, someone who loves his dog, and someone who LOVES his dog. WARNING: sexual and inappropriate subject matter. Consider yourself warned!

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This is book two for me in my Sophia and Theo series. My books all have codes in them that my readers have to solve. But if they don't want to solve them, they can read the book just for the enjoyment of it.

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Harlie Steele is a single mother overcoming the emotional scars leftover from the violence of her abusive marriage. When this small town girl meets a rock icon, their whirlwind romance helps her regain her lost sense of self worth. Lex Callatori pulls her into his tempestuous life of paparazzi, tabloids, and bodyguards, sweeping her into a love so deep and sensual that she will never be the same. But all is not perfect in their new paradise. Determined to have the object of his desire all to himself, a stalker threatens to tear the couple's world apart, becoming more obsessed as their devotion to each other grows stronger. If his identity is not discovered in time, their very lives could be destroyed. (Romantic Suspense)

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This novel-length memoir details the growth and emotional shifts that occur when a thirtysomething woman decides to turn her husband's sexual fantasy into reality. While there will certainly be some vivid descriptions of sex as the story progresses, it is intended for a mainstream audience. The more detailed the critique, the better. I can take it!

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THIS IS A SEQUEL. This is also raw, a work in progress. I'm taking a risk here, going out of my comfort zone by putting up something that's not yet finished. I’m hoping you’ll see some growth from me in this. Sapphire Reign takes place almost 10 years after Kings & Queens. I’d appreciate reviews from readers, who've read my first book, since they can (hopefully) see what I’m doing differently and if it’s working, but anyone is welcome to read this. However, since it is a sequel, spoilers abound. So only proceed if you have no intention of reading Book 1.

In a world where wickedness is exalted and even children know the sting of suffering, Majesty is trapped in anguish five months after her young daughter's death in a preschool gas explosion. When she receives a bizarre glimmer of hope that her little girl may still be alive, she fights heaven and hell to reclaim the happiness that's been stripped from her. But with so many enemies, maybe someone is determined to make Majesty pay. Or maybe her daughter really is gone forever.

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