Content: murder

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I am adding to my collection of reject slips on this one. I posted first draft chapters a while ago but I guess I need to re-write the re-written version. All comments suggestions and edits gratefully accepted. I will be posting chapters at one or two per week (not to bump others) for the next 20 or so weeks.

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Oh no! Another romance novel from a lady that can't finish the first one she started. This is my NaNo project and I will admit right now that it's raw and has no editing. I'm going with the flow and writing it before editing, or I'm afraid I'll get too hard on myself and abandon it. All crit toward what I need to edit will be very much appreciated. Allison Crawford is a waitress living the simple life, always pushing her dreams to the side. When a tradgedy throws Lane Bishop into her life, nothing will ever be the same.

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2nd in a series. **************** This is not a supernatural tale, but an attempt at police procedural in which lycanthropy is a mental condition - the plot centres more on the chaos caused by the werewolf sightings than the wolf itself. ********** plot: Something dark and hairy roams the steep parklands that flank the suburbs of Alcove. A mauled body is found in the crawlspace of an abandoned house. Young DC Cal Dion, recovering from car crash injuries and newly reinstated in his home office, is set upon a trail that zigzags between murky dangers, howlings in the night, peculiar coworkers, and an edgy romance.

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-Summary- "Get a Clue" Madelyn Berichon, (or if you'd rather not risk bodily injury you can call her Maddi) an accomplished Paralegal/Criminal Profiler in Atlanta, moved to Seagate Island for a fresh start, leaving behind a shattered relationship and taking with her some old emotional baggage and a cat named Orphan Annie. Maddi is what you might call a powerful petite. At first glance she is five feet three inches of slim, blond, blue eyed cuteness (never let her hear you call her cute). After getting to know her a little better, you'll find that she's a compact package of dyno'mite'. On assignment on Seagate Island, Maddi embarks on an exciting and overtly dangerous roller coaster ride to find a vicious killer and prove the innocence of the law firm’s client, while covertly carrying out her mission. Along the way she meets her match in Mac Adams, a freelance investigative journalist. Of course there comes into play the inevitable conflict between paralegal/client confidentiality and the journalistic need for information, but they handle it in a mature adult manner (most of the time). Maddi is undercover as a Paralegal with, Mathews, Rickert and Lyndel, Attorneys at Law. Robert Mathews, the only living member left in the firm and one of two lawyers on the Island, desperately needed the help of a sharp, intelligent paralegal like Maddi. He had been commissioned by millionaire humanitarian William Patterson to defend his son Josh who was charged with the murder of Deborah Jennings, the owner of a local Import/Export business. She was found bludgeoned on the floor of her shop among the artifacts that she had been unpacking. It seems that Josh was found by the police standing over the body with the murder weapon in his hand. Maddi finds herself questioning people such as, Senatorial candidate Rodney Maten and his wife Vallerie, son Nick and Daughter Laurel. They seem to be friendly and cooperative on the surface, yet there is an undercurrent of trepidation. She finds that many of the upper crust "Native Islanders" have more than their share of skeletons in their closets and their lives are full of secrets that they will do almost anything to keep private. In the course of their investigation Mac and Maddi uncover a plot that reaches to the very core of the elite society of the Island and abroad. It's an abhorrent situation that involves drug cartels and politicians and cold blooded murder. It is a conspiracy so intriguingly incredible that she has difficulty convincing authorities and even her own boss that it actually exists. While putting her own life in danger Maddi must make sense of it all, complete her assignment, clear Josh and deal with a budding romance with Mac. She does all this and more in that engagingly funny, candid, one-of-a-kind Maddi way.

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Allie Carpenter, a rising young pianist goes missing during a celebratory evening with friends at a nightclub. I would be most grateful for feedback on mistakes in everything from typos to chronology, things which don't "gel" This is the umpteenth edit and as I need to get it BACK on the site as FAST as possible, I am going to double-bunk chapters where they fit inside the 5000 word limit and try to post once every 24 hours.) THE FIRST POSTING IS CHAPTERS 1-2

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I promised to get an edited copy of this into the hands of the friend on which the main character is based by April 15, 2007. In an effort to only be a year late, I've finally started working on it. I'll repost each chapter as I make changes. I'd like to thank those who read it the first time and gave me excellent suggestions. Weasel, aka Larry, is a most unusual private detective. He is hired by an attorney who needs protection and along with his secretary, Miss Everhart and two odd sidekicks, he saves the day. Almost.

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This is the start of a series of stories about a young man that makes a tragic mistake but benefits from it and has to deal with the struggle between guilt and the desire to live.

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Prologue introduces key characters and hopefully foreshadows conflict to come Interested in feedback on Narrative hook Pacing Potential suspense/reader interest Reaction to characters

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Growing up in a world without a father affects an aspiring journalist's newfound faith and his relationship with those around him. After Aidan Lassiter learns he has a teenage son, he remembers a troubling relationship from his past. Throughout this tale, the death of a neighbor caught in the crossfire of romance gone sour offers a symbol for the power of love. Tear it apart, no holds barred. I want advice on both grammatical and structural issues (sentence structure, pace, diction, etc.) and content issues. Is it believable? Does my dialogue make sense? Do you want to keep reading?

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Premise: Love midst danger can be found anywhere in the universe. I began this novel about two years ago. I have completed about two-thirds of it. It is about a man, John Smith, a widower who found an empress who won him in a murder trial. It is better to start at the beginning, but if you have read up to here and have not reviewed the chapters,feel free to jump in.

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The main character began as JOSEPH HIGHLANDER. PAMELA MYLAR, a childhood girl friend heard about a helicopter being bomb with him, wife, CARRIE and two close friends, BEN and BECKY TRENT. Two years later, she learned he wasn't the fourth victim in the bombing. She visited the institute. ROBERT DAEMON is a faithful friend and Joseph's lawyer and JANICE is Robert's wife. Joseph and Pamela look different. The FBI give them a new identity as FRANK and TAMMY JACKSON. LAUREL, Joseph's daughter and JIMMY HIGHLANDER, a son-in-law and also Joseph's adopted son, challenged Frank's take-over of their father's institute.

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When everyone around her starts dying and a mysterious young detective working the case, Siera struggles to understand the unexplainable with her time quickly running out..... I'd greatly appreciate any feedback people can give me, i've never written a novel before. I also tend to post the chapters before much editing, so I know they need to be (mainly because i'm crap at grammar and english rules, so i'm learning from your comments as i go!!). I'd really like any comments on the flow of the chapter, content, anything that stands out etc....All feedback is welcome!!

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I tried to capture the intensity of childhood rivalry and jealousy. In this case it has leeched so deeply into the psyche of the protagonist that it has dominated the way she has led her life. I welcome any feedback on the telling, organisation and effectiveness. Thanks

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Story I wrote some time ago, when digital cameras were quite new, so I had to try and update. Any comments welcome. Edited 25 March 2008

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With his parents recently dead from a car accident, Shaw has become lost in life. Unsure of where to go he finds solace in the letters from his Aunt. An Aunt he has never met and before it's all over, an Aunt he'll wish he had never met. He goes to live with her in a small village located in the back woods of Florida, and it turns out that this particular village is run by a cult, of which his aunt is a member of, and the cult is run by a particularly evil man by the name of Pastor Brown. Any comments at all would be much appreciated as this is my first crack at a novel. Thank you.

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When an impulsive FBI agent discovers she is about to be fired, she tries to save her job by finding the serial killer targeting reality shows and saving the final victim. She finally discovers they have targeted the wrong people and that the man she has been protecting is the real killer. Now she must stop the killer before he claims his final victim and gets away. Note: R Rated in terms of language. There is a fairly graphic murder.

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The Chandler Mirror is something I created several years ago. It reads like a prime-time show, only with a lot of gay characters. It's meant to be read like a guilty pleasure and not to be taken seriously. Book one is short compared to future postings, meant to familiarize the reader with the central characters. Any and all feedback is welcome. PLEASE - DO NOT JUMP INTO THIS HALF-WAY OR ON THE LAST POSTING. Rory

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My first crack at Science Fiction. However, it is written, step by step, to appear completely logical with no aliens, monsters, apparitions, etc. Since it concerns time travel, I've been advised that it would definitely be set in the Science Fiction genre. Check out the tags for the variety in the plotting.

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When three childhood friends grow up together, in Clearwater Florida, they realize they share more then being best of friends. They share a serial killer whose on the lose. When they find out their the next victims on his list, there friendship teaches them the meaning of life, and what it means to fight to stay alive, not only for themselves, but for each other. For Jennifer, Gail and Liz, life has always been fun. The three of them have always done what they wanted, without giving much thought to anything else. Being so much alike, yet different, the three of them shared everything, from growing pains, to broken hearts, graduation, to college and finally their own independence. Now as the serial killer closes in, he leaves clues behind, for the three of them, and suddenly they find themselves at odds with one another, pointing their finger at anyone and everyone, including the three new men in their life. When they’re forced to face the demons from their past, they learn to trust one another all over again, as it becomes evident that their only hope of survival is to stick together and keep their eyes open, and Don’t Blink.

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Time for another installment...I had so much fun the first time around.

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Bailey Winters lived the ordinary life until someone came to kill her, and she discovered another part of herself, creating a life that she must live.

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The Guardian of Eden is the story of a teenager, Garrett, and his twelve year old sister, Eden. After years of abuse from their mother and her boyfriends they finally achieve what seems like a happy life. Their mother has married a good man, Garrett has a beautiful girlfriend, and both he and his sister attend a prestigious private school. But tragedy lurks beneath the surface as Garrett discovers that the abuse to his little sister goes beyond what he ever imagined. His overwhelming love for his sister and desire to protect her lead him to commit a murder that could destroy them all.

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Sonya Bigger is dead and John Kidde could give a damn. His thoughts, his only thoughts, focus on whether Nikki will ever return, and how best to numb the pain today. Lee Harper is a college senior in desperate need of competent legal counsel, and an investigator who can shine the spotlight on the true killer. When Trim Thomas, a self-contained PI, is hired by Lee Harper’s parents to find out who really killed their son’s girlfriend, he is relegated to a meeting with John where he finds him enjoying his first, or tenth, cocktail of the morning in his office. Though unimpressed with John’s demonstrative apathy, Trim sees a reflection of sodden potential, and asks whether John might offer his legal services on the case. In Sonya Bigger, John and Trim discover a girl seemingly loved by all; an inexplicable murder. Their investigation takes them across the campus of Sam Houston State and to the town of Fountain, where The Chop House looms as something more than just a terrific steakhouse. After uncovering a nefarious drug connection to the restaurant they think they have their man. But the final twist is a lesson Sonya learned; one she never could have learned at Sam Houston, with a fatal final exam. Throughout, as John and Trim pursue the case, they find that the net they’ve cast just keeps getting Bigger and Bigger. And in the end each man may save the other.

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A murderous little quartet plan each others demise - in a very practical way :) Who is left standing??? (A little piece of flash fiction which I have re-written. I have taken the excellent advice of ONIKE (bless him/her) and hopefully clarified it!)

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CONCLUDING PART - (Note to potential reviewers - it's important that you read this short story in sequence) Nursery Crimes - Alan Grant intercepts a call from his troublesome wife who sounds as though she is about to take her own life. He arrives at the motel to find her almost dead and watches as her life slips away. A happy ending?

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(Note to potential reviewers - it's important that you read the parts of this short story in sequence) Nursery Crimes - Alan Grant intercepts a call from his troublesome wife who sounds as though she is about to take her own life. He arrives at the motel to find her almost dead and watches as her life slips away. A happy ending?

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This short story was posted last year and then taken down from the site. I apologise to anyone who has read it before, I don't want to bore you! I have never submitted it a magazine or competition. Taking the advice of my good reviewers, I have edited it as the reviews have come in. I don't want to re-write and re-post again, it would try everyone's tolerance too far!

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The Hard Cold Kiss Goodbye is flash fiction in form, but this has a twist: it will comprise a number of self-contained "images" (or scenes, if you prefer). The reader is invited to assemble the final number of "images" into a narrative string that you find pleasing. In this way, you become the producer of your own experience of The Hard Cold Kiss Goodbye.

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This had been a sad two days for Virginia Tech University where precious lives were snuffed out yesterday, Monday, the 16th of April, 2007. This is a day to be long remembered.

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The working title of this novel is Corporate Samurai "love begets hate, trust begets betrayal, lust leads to death"// This novel takes place in the mid to late 1970's in the US and Japan. Bill Sanford is a young CPA working for the Kentucky Fried Chicken Corporation. He was brought up as a Foreign Service brat and had spent three years in Japan. He had dreams of an international career but, his wife would have no part of it.// Ray Easton, KFC's Regional VP, Far East, is a cunning scoundrel and consummate liar. Ray is a master of insider trading of stock, and spreads the wealth to gain favors. He has always stayed one step ahead of the law.// Mike Adachi is an executive with one of Japan's major trading companies. He was raised in San Francisco and speaks English as a native. He launches a plot to bring a major US fast food company into the Japanese market, relying on a complex chain of industrial espionage.// Strategic Planning is taking corporate America by storm. KFC'S CEO has caught the bug. He brings in two hot shots to produce and lead a corporate-wide Strategic Planning initiative. Resistance to strategic planning and the new hot shots builds, and the corporate politics accelerate, with battle lines being drawn.// Japan has been through post war reconstruction and is becoming a world class economic power. Some of its former military leaders are determined to achieve economically, what they failed to accomplish militarily.// Two trading company giants, Mitsubishi and Sumitomo, become embroiled in a struggle for dominance of the exploding, western style, fast food market.// The cultural differences between Japan and the US complicate matters for both sides. The inner workings of Corporate America and Japan are revealed in all their successes, but also, their corruption and greed.// Personal conflicts and deep seated vendettas, some originating during World War II, unfold.// Seduction and love affairs are an integral part of the plot. They illustrate the differences in social views of sexuality between the East and West.// Industrial espionage involving two highly competitive US fast food companies, two Japanese Zaibatsu and the Japanese and Mexican underworld unfolds.//The head of the Yakuza (Japanese mafia)is an effective eliminator of problem people.// Many of the key characters were involved in WWII and their individual experiences influence their business behavior.// Cultural differences subtly emerge, and the exploitation of others to achieve one's ends is front and center.// Personal ethics, or the lack there of, and the constant tug between good and evil are interspersed throughout. View table of contents..

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This is the ultimate rant about one of my biggest pet peeves. Not for the faint of heart and by this, I mean men. All my male friends are horrified by this story. Luckily all my women friends are as sick and twisted as I am.

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In the semi-small town of Cedar Creek, some people don’t care to lock their doors, even though the woods hold secrets and the children are terrified to venture into them. The warm sense of security is shattered for Majesty Alistair, a feisty but grief-stricken teen, when she uncovers a mass murder plot deep in the thick. She struggles to find and defeat the would-be-killers before they act, but they have an agenda far bigger than she ever assumed. Violence rocks the town, leaving residents reeling and drawing Majesty into the middle of it all. With danger always pressing, police seemingly getting nowhere and those closest to her looking guilty, she continues hunting and charges into an evil web, but the truth and her actions threaten to haunt her forever, especially since she’s left with blood on her hands, the blood of someone she loves.

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Ben Slater has been medically discharged from the Army. A handsome, intelligent young man, whose appearance and life have been changed beyond recognition after suffering horrific facial burns whilst on active service in the Middle-East. Alone and discarded, Ben feels betrayed by the Army, society and life in general. The outlook is bleak and he comes to terms with his disfigurement by hiding in the shadows and avoiding human contact wherever possible. Things start to improve for Ben after he lands a job as a Customer Service Operative. Working as a disembodied voice on the other end of the telephone, Ben finds that he can be himself. He rediscovers companionship and finds friendship amongst his colleagues, Kev, a paraplegic and a blind girl called Mary. The unlikely trio of society’s outsiders bond, and life finally seems worth living as Ben learns to laugh again. Together the three begin to regain a sense of hope for the future. The rejuvenation is short lived as Ben is arrested and stands accused of the kidnapping, rape and murder of friend. A tenacious detective gives him a rough time and when he is finally exonerated and released, Ben is enraged. He is hell-bent upon finding the killer himself,and extracting bloody vengance at any cost. Ben is ready to die… but during the transition, he finds a whole new reason to live.

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J.D. discovers Henry is more than a hired hand. The witch protects. An innocent girl is murdered. The county balance is gone. The end is near.

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This novel takes place in the mid to late 1970's in the US and Japan. Bill Sanford is a young CPA working for the Tennessee Fried Chicken Corporation. He was brought up as a Foreign Service brat and had spent three years in Japan. He had dreams of an international career but, his wife would have no part of it.// Ray Easton, TFC's Regional VP, Far East, is a cunning scoundrel and consummate liar. Ray is a master of insider trading of stock, and spreads the wealth to gain favors. He has always stayed one step ahead of the law.// Mike Adachi is an executive with one of Japan's major trading companies. He was raised in San Francisco and speaks English as a native. He launches a plot to bring a major US fast food company into the Japanese market, relying on a complex chain of industrial espionage.// Strategic Planning is taking corporate America by storm. TFC'S CEO has caught the bug. He brings in two hot shots to produce and lead a corporate-wide Strategic Planning initiative. Resistance to strategic planning and the new hot shots builds, and the corporate politics accelerate, with battle lines being drawn.// Japan has been through post war reconstruction and is becoming a world class economic power. Some of its former military leaders are determined to achieve economically, what they failed to accomplish militarily.// Two trading company giants, Mitsugawa and , become embroiled in a struggle for dominance of the exploding, western style, fast food market.// The cultural differences between Japan and the US complicate matters for both sides. The inner workings of Corporate America and Japan are revealed in all their successes, but also, their corruption and greed.// Personal conflicts and deep seated vendettas, some originating during World War II, unfold.// Seduction and love affairs are an integral part of the plot. They illustrate the differences in social views of sexuality between the East and West.// Industrial espionage involving two highly competitive US fast food companies, two Japanese Zaibatsu and the Japanese and Mexican underworld unfolds.// Many of the key characters were involved in WWII and their individual experiences influence their business behavior.// Cultural differences subtly emerge, and the exploitation of others to achieve one's ends is front and center.// Personal ethics, or the lack there of, and the constant tug between good and evil are interspersed throughout.

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This is the first of i think three parts. I am trying to figure how to break it up. The story is about a rural County divided into four sections. The events in this particular part of the story set up the rest of the story. There is a lot of meanness with ignorance and isolation. Please, see for yourself.

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A boy witnesses an unspeakable horror--the senseless killing of a childhood friend. His mother's in a rehabilitation center; his brother's a bully. Is there no one to help him through his grief? (This is the novel I'm writing for NaNoWriMo.)

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This flash fiction was written a fair while ago and now it needs to pay it's rent for being on my computer! I have plans to send it, in March, to a horror fiction competition here in Aussieland. I don't know whether it is horrible enough to class as horror. I have tightened this story in accordance with advice given in this latest round of reviews.

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The murderer of a beautiful child, lost in the foggy mist.

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Part one The Beginning

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For Lesley C. Weston.

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Nothing is more important than feeding your children.... I reworked the ending a bit, it's a tad longer, but I think it's better.

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Cheating can be deadly. Please be as frank as possible, if it's horrible tell me why, I'll never get better otherwise.

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The small quiet guys are the ones you have to watch for. (This was the best title I could come up with, any suggestions would be appreciated."

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“When the need arises, God won’t bother with plagues and floods. He’ll just send me.” Someone is murdering L.A.’s most depraved criminals. As a favor to the LAPD, former drug-runner, turned cop, turned millionaire playboy, Hale Parrish, agrees to use his supernatural talents to investigate. His search is short-lived when the vigilante, referring to himself as “Judgment,” tracks Hale down to reveal a life-changing secret: both of them are members of an elite bloodline chosen to enact God’s wrath upon the wicked. While Hale decides whether his birthright is a blessing or a curse, shadows from his criminal past emerge, forcing him to face his demons, protect his family, and reclaim control of his destiny. At 90,000 words, Light of Judgment is a dark, gritty, fast-paced thriller with spiritual undertones.

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You must always be careful what you wish for. Sometimes it comes true... (This story was written for the Australian market, which necessitated adding an explanation for the USA reviewers)

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I looked down at my clothing which were covered in blood... I'm not sure what Genre this one is meant to be let me know!

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