Content: love

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THIS IS A REWRITE OF, The Devil's Handshake. I edited it down from 7900 words to 5600 words. This is for my, TEN SHORT STORIES, TEN SCREENPLAYS project. (On my third one of ten). ≈≈≈I owned a Weimaraner for 12 years. My favorite type of dog, a lot like me in personality, lol. ≈≈≈ This is horror, but listed as lit-fic, since horror never gets the readers I want. ≈≈≈ I cut so much that I may not have correct ted/rewritten 100%. ≈≈≈≈

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A woman's journeys through the Middle East following the end of a relationship. A meditation on love, sex, journeys and finding your way out of the desert. Experimental in places. Conventional, too. I've added a touch of exposition, but a kibbutz is a communal way of living (largely agricultural) practiced in Israel circa the 1920s. The kibbutz movement has changed a lot since its inception.

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To impress a girl, an ugly young man undertakes a robbery, and inadvertently kills someone. This sets off a chain of events which changes the course of history. This is an early work of mine which has undergone significant rewrites, and I am on the verge of sending it to market. I would like some honest opinions about its readability, characterizations, idea content, and literary merit (if any).

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I wrote this some time ago for my fiance. Hope you enjoy reading it.

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Whether family, spousal, or companion origin, unanswered love can haunt dreams incessantly, even when time and space has made one’s conscious days void of such impact. Lest me forget, hope does indeed reign supreme.

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Two poems, "Dumpstered" by Odin Roark and "Wedding Song" by David Lehman (partially quoted below), sent me on a path of thinking about the same subject. This poem is at least a partial result of that process. Comments always welcome.

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This is something I wrote for my father when my mother passed away, well it was for me to practice as well. comments are welcome

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no...not a picto...just a plain old ordinary poem!

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Read it, the whole way through, by the end you will understand.

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Some of this story will be familiar to those who read fall From Grace. I'm going to try my hand at suspenseful romance or commercial fiction so the emphasis has switched to Grace being a single working physician who meets, of course, Dr. Right a few chapters down the road... Anyway, it's just an experiment to write in a different genre... It begins in a federal medical center - a psychiatric hospital for mentally ill inmates... Any and all feedback is welcome and appreciated.

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An observation made while on a recent journey. Traveling somehow sharpens my attention to the world around me. Miss Emily's line came to me as this episode concluded. Comments welcome.

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"If there is love, there is hope that one may have real families, real brotherhood, real equanimity, real peace. If the love within your mind is lost and you see other beings as enemies, then no matter how much knowledge or education or material comfort you have, only suffering and confusion will ensue" His Holiness the Dalai Lama from 'The little book of Buddhism' ----- Trying to simplify the meaning of love promotes many an exploration. This is but one.

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I want to know about knitting, rips and tears. I'd also like to know if this is a unique plot idea. Have you ever seen this plot twist in fiction before. If so, where?

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This is a tale which is based on a true story. And by TRUE, I mean FALSE. It never happened. And yet, it did happen. It is a love story (Well, my version of one) And I must say that I had one hell of a time writing it. And so I hope that YOU have one hell of a time reading it. Thank you. K.D.

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Joey finds his house ranksacked and his mother dead. With help of neighbors and friends he learns who the perpetrator is and then takes action. The story could actually be used as the first portion of a novel I wrote. This is my first post and as a newbie I want the reviewer to be critical, brutal. Let me know whats good and whats not. I'll be able to use your input to help my novel too. Thanks, Wes Ellington

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Hi. I had the privilege of growing up in a neighborhood with a drive-in theater around the corner. This is an homage to coming of age, friendship, first love, and mostly a paen to the movies. I saw them all when I was a kid -- for free. This is a short novella. Any comments are welcome.

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Personifying other forms of love give rise to often ignored appreciations.

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NOTE: Sorry for the confusion about the title. I decided to go back with the original title (the one I had before posting here on tNBW). I think it suits the trilogy better.

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Is being psychic a gift? For Mackenzie it's a curse--especially when that "gift" delivers her into the hands of a serial killer.

When Mackenzie Hill discovers her mother’s colossal deception, she tosses her life down the garbage disposal and relocates to Watcher's Point, Oregon in search of answers. What she finds is shocking; the man she's been dreaming about for years not only exists in the flesh, but he's got a secret agenda of his own.

Aidan Payne doesn’t expect to get emotionally involved with anyone, least of all a woman who looks at him with disturbing insight. As a serial killer escalates his twisted game, Aidan’s protective instincts take over and sparks begin to ignite. Both realize that if the killer isn't caught, Mackenzie might become the next victim. But neither could have foreseen the web of lies spanning three decades—lies which paved the way for the wrath of a serial killer.

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I am not fanatic about anything. I am passionate about almost anything I enjoy very much. I am not a religious person, but I am a Christian who lived almost 50 years knowing all about God from books, classes, being in church and whatever. After that age I met God and got to know him on a first name basis and I do enjoy writing about my faith. It is not to offend you but to share my joy hope you will enjoy it too.

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A woman receives a shock at her husband's funeral. This is a 7K story posted in two parts due to posting length limitations, but is really best read with no break. I'm interested in pace, does it keep you reading, and in reaction to the MC and conclusion. All input much appreciated.

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A woman receives a shock at her husband's funeral. This is a 7K story posted in two parts due to posting length limitations, but is really best read with no break. I'm interested in pace, does it keep you reading, and in reaction to the MC and conclusion. All input much appreciated.

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This novel is set in a remote indigenous mining town in Cape York Australia. The book is a coming of age story about a young women, Sam Tucker, and her friends based on actual events. For Sam's 18th birthday, rather than another backyard party gatecrashed by others, she convinces her closest friends to going camping on the bank of a wild river and the events that unfold change their lives forever. I wanted it to be based around characters that secondary students (13 - 18) could relate to and with action and adventure that would be interesting and leave them wanting to know more. I've never written anything before. My recent addiction to blogging sparked an interest in writing and a sense of purpose(http:/cassielobley@blogspot.com) I found this site to be be a fantastic avenue to learn and mature my literary skills. All feedback - absolutely everything - would be greatly appreciated. Don't hold back.

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In 1959, Miles Davis had released one of the most successful albums ever, Kind Of Blue. These Blues crossed state lines, even as far as Mississippi. That song inspired this poem. One of my greatest habits as a writer is the cliff hanger. The readers imagination is just as great as mine. So I will let the readers finish this particular poem. It is what it is. I thank you in advance for reading. Not feeling well and this is what comes out of my mind when I'm under the weather.

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Taking a break from the serious dramatic poems. This is poetry-lite. I hope it goes down easy. I was just fascinated by the life of Emily Dickinson- Had to say goodbye to her. Have a great New Year all

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WHAT KISS DESERVES TO BE TRADEMARKED? You'll find out in this literate, comedic, romantic, aphoristic, ten-years-in-the-writing, sci-fi thriller. Only the first page is posted below, since that's all I need feedback on at the moment. I'm mostly interesting in sentence-level commentary, not global suggestions. Which lines catch your eye, for better or worse, and why? I put a lot of pressure on sentences to provide immediate pleasure to the readers, not just the accumulative thrill of character and plot development. Novels are often mostly empty space, wasting their readers' time by deferring pleasure through over-focus on plot and character development. Sentences, though, can provide immediate pleasure--as evidenced in "money lines," those beautifully struck sentences that, even in the best of writers, can be found only a few times a chapter. Novelists can do more to thrill immediately by putting more energy into sentences. You'll see what I mean in the brief descriptions of the main characters below (copied from the novel's opening chapters). If lines like these appeal to you, you'll enjoy the rest of it . . . because the texts is filled with 'em. :-) Maya Lyon: "Maya smiled, her face a feature-rich Brazilian package of calligraphic piercings, lash-black hair, museum-quality aquamarine eyes, and unretouched asymmetrical scars." Hannah Mays "[Hannah's clothes] were mostly shot up and torn off, leaving her body on full topographic display. Her muscles were ornate and well-detailed, a variable geography of curves and cables and shadowed cross-cuts that made regular bodies look like tube arms hanging from an egg foundation." Poor Tom: "Just sitting, [Tom] was a few amputations shy of sharing the circle Da Vinci drew around the Ventruvian Man; standing, Tom made Michelangelo's statuesque David appear like a previous species of underfed teen; and in both positions, his hands were notable, large enough to palm a liter of water and, of late, having been all over her." ----- As mentioned, I'm mostly interesting in sentence-level commentary, not global suggestions. Which lines catch your eye, for better or worse, and why? THANKS IN ADVANCE FOR COMMENTARY! ~john

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Here is the beginning of my story. Which for some of you that have been reading will get a better understanding of the route of the story. ***Please let me know if it makes sense, if the dialogue fits the time period etc.***

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Rewrite. It is horror, but literary? I am lost in the forest of the trees after writing this and I chopped away with my tense ax, but can't see the clear sky yet. ≈≈≈ Another version of this is coming down the chute soon. This is the first of 15 (with 2 versions = 30) short stories I will be rewriting for an envisioned book of short stories. ≈≈≈ This is not a true story. I CAN'T MAKE CORRECTION SINCE IT IS 5.87K, THUS IT IS IN THE DREADED RED STATE- måx

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A poem in three parts. Previously posted in three sections.

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This is back story to the novel, Repercussions, about Frank Holbrook who has been in love with a woman named Claire, but has ended the relationship because of his obligations to his wife and family.

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The plight of an addict. All comments welcome.

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Another shitty free verse poem. All feedback is welcome.

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Rarely, every now and then I hit a poem in left field. You might need a leather glove to catch this one. For thirty years, I promised myself to never write bedroom poetry. Please forgive me for this one retraction. Okay I'm embarrassed already. This poem will have to explain itself.

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Dealing with distance, I’m reminded that this simple virtue of "trust" is perhaps the most illusive.

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I dedicate the following Poem to Ruth Marie. She is the character in the poem. We communicate only on facebook when she is strong enough. And sometimes I think she is a lot stronger than I am. My heart breaks each time we talk, but my pen is strong. It is so nice to be amongst such great writers at TNBW. During this holiday season, take time to realize how fortunate we really are.

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This is a short piece of prose that I wrote for a Creative Writing unit a few years ago. It's been a hit thus far so I thought I'd post it on here and see what sort of feedback I receive. It was an observation assignment in which we had to choose a particular type of person from a list, go out and observe one of these people in the real world and then record our observations. I chose 'observe a drug addict' because it was particularly close to home for me at the time.

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A short story I wrote for a little girl who loved fairy tales. If you've read chapters 1 and 2 of my Novel, "Midnight Man," this story will probably sound familiar. But I hope you will still be able to enjoy this story on its own merits. I would like to publish this story in some sort of short story collection or anthology, along with several other short stories I've written, either with other authors or by myself. So let me know if anyone else is interested in doing something like that.

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This story won a contest run by Monadnock Writers Group, and was selected as one of seven short stories (plus a bunch of poetry and photographs) to be published in their anthology themed on memory. The anthology has just been published and is entitled "Shadow and Light: A Literary Anthology on Memory." http://www.monadnockwriters.org/publications.html Of course, I'm generally not the literary type (sex, drugs, rock and roll is more my speed - ha!), but I wrote this story when I was pretty sad -the lead is modeled after a dear friend whom I'd just lost. Do you have to be depressed to write literary fiction? (Just KIDDING, sheesh!) As with my other work, the lead is a no-bullshit kind of woman (just like my friend - a true-blue Yankees fan, btw! -was). So caveat emptor: It's a little depressing : O : ) *** Note: I thought I posted the final version of this, but reviewers have been pointing out some punctuation malfunctions and typos, so I must have goofed. I've made the corrections.

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Ironically, it frequently takes errors to make right the wrongs we innocently embrace in the name of love. Often, only our nightmares offer resolve. How torturous at times. How long the process. Fortunately, love is resilient for those who finally discover what it’s not.

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Good at Dying A look through the gauzy curtain Blue Rubians hang between love and their other appetites...

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lit-fiction about neighbors ≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈

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Welcome to the Park. This is a revised version of the previously titled Chandler Mirror. I changed the name for reasons of my own and doing so allowed me make neccessary adjustments. This is written like a series, and only for fun. Grammar isn't my strong suit and feel free to point out what I missed. - Thanks!

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The inspiration for this novel is the Victorian obsession with 'sanitising' history; changing, ignoring or deleting facts which they found unpalatable. One such myth is the belief that women did not go to sea in the ships of His Majesty’s Royal Navy. They did. Officially they were forbidden, but some captains and officers took their wives with them and allowed women to accompany some of their men. There were even enlightened masters who allowed troupes of resident prostitutes to sail on board to service the physical needs of the crew! Another myth is that the Royal Navy was an evil organisation run by sadistic officers handing out cruel, wicked punishments to men fed on putrid, rotting food who regularly indulged in acts of sodomy! The truth is, the royal Navy was a benevolent employer with a keen interest in the welfare of its men. Ships depended on vast amounts of healthy manpower to keep them afloat. Every ship carried a surgeon. Many of whom went on to become eminent physicians of their time and many discoveries and advances in medical science can be attributed to them. Injured sailors received a pension and, realising the value of healthy men, captains and pursers devoted much effort in procuring fresh water and food whenever possible. With the exception of voyages to America, West Indies or the Southern Ocean, ships were seldom far from land. The health and fitness of the men of the Royal Navy was a considerable contributing factor that enabled them to win every major engagement in which they were involved for over two hundred years. Britain did, indeed, rule the waves. It took a lot of manpower to work a man-of-war and every man was vital. A sailor flogged until his back bled was of no use at all, and the lash was used far more sparingly than we have been led to believe. Floggings did, however, occur when necessary. Discipline had to been maintained for the safety and efficient running of the ship and the most common offence was drunkenness, due to sailors hoarding or acquiring illicit supplies of alcohol. An inebriated sailor was a danger to himself, his mates and the ship. As water quickly became unfit to drink, sailors were, paradoxically, given a daily ration of beer and diluted rum which took care of their bodily need for fluids. The low alcohol content being worked off by the sheer physical nature of the work they had to do. Sailors, usually young men in their late teens and early twenties, had other bodily needs and the navy took care of that as well. Sexual frustration leading to fights, clumsiness and accidents was as much a hazard as drunkenness, storms or enemy action and not conducive to efficiency. As most voyages lasted about six weeks, sexual frustration, to the point of leading to sodomy, which was a hanging offence, did not occur. Prostitutes existed in abundance in every port and it was customary, before a ship sailed, to allow the women on board. 'Marguerite, Heroine or Whore' is at the moment, a working title. I am useless at coming up with good, imaginative titles that inspire the interest of would-be readers. The story is about Margaret, a destitute Huguenot silk weaver in eighteenth century London. When her husband fails to return from a rendezvous with someone offering him employment, Margaret goes in search of him and discovers that he has been pressed into service aboard a Royal Navy frigate. Having nowhere to go or means to support herself, she joins him on board but tragedy soon changes her circumstances. A naïve and righteous young woman she is determined to avoid the only salvation open to a woman in her situation and strenuously avoids descending into a world of prostitution but, in spite of her efforts to remain chaste, is raped and left with a child growing in her belly. A child that she believes, because of the circumstances of its conception, was sired by the devil. Adding to her misery she is afflicted with the scourge of the eighteenth century, the pox, the stigma of sin that could destroy her good looks and which she fears above all else. Sharing the trials and tribulations of a 'Jack Tar' Margaret survives a horrendous battle where, accredited with the killing of an enemy sailor, she assists the ship's surgeon in his grim task of amputating limbs and suturing terrible wounds. Called upon to interpret the language of a captured Frenchman Margaret is introduced to the soft comforts of gracious living and the low morality of the upper classes. In spite of her determination to avoid prostitution and unrequited love for the first lieutenant, she is abused by the captain. Unexpectedly finding the love of a decent man fate, however, is determined to deny her happiness. Following the cruel rape of slave women at the end of a voyage to the West Indies, she is attacked by men she once regarded her friends. Giving birth at sea to a child which, clearly, is not her man's, she is abandoned by him upon the ship's return to England. Once again alone, destitute and impoverished, hunger forces Margaret to forget her righteous principles and sell herself to anyone with cash in his pockets and lust in his loins. Determined not to remain a dockside molly, she sets out to attract a better clientèle and, as mistress to a gentleman, is presented to the most eminent fornicator in the land; His Royal Highness, The Prince Regent. Having climbed the social ladder, reaching the pinnacle of her hopes and dreams, fate cruelly intervenes when, in an argument with her benefactor, she believes she kills him and is forced to revert to her former means of survival; selling herself at the dockside gate. Now a fugitive, Margaret is determined to escape harsh, undeserved justice, and returns to the sea aboard a man-of-war commanded by Great Britain's most celebrated naval hero, Admiral Horatio Nelson. The story concludes with our heroin at Trafalgar and present at the death of the illustrious admiral and, having performed his dying wish, is denied her rightful place in British history.

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A pg version of this poem has been made into a video and is posted on Youtube at this link ---- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ceijq_z48Y4 ----- I had to water it down a bit for Youtube. So I renamed it By the Sea It would be super cool if you took a look at the video and left a comment on Youtube. Some people like the pg version better and some like this one - a comparison of the two would also be nice to know. Thanks in advance if you do go to Youtube. I will do several reviews of your writing in return if you subscribe to her channel or comment on the poem on Youtube. It takes quite a bit of work to do a video poem, and it's my friend's channel, so it would be nice to know if our idea on video poems is an idea worth continuing!

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I guess I'd like to know what do you think??! Too graphic??

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Any and all comments would be greatly appreciated if that is, you haven't listen to my warning in the title.

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A young man goes too far with another man's wife. He finds a new port in a storm and has a beautiful woman's face tattooed on his muscular arm.

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There is a word of profanity in this, so pass if you don't care for such things. Any feedback is welcome. I am posting old poetry for work shopping, to see if I can't find a pattern in which to form a chapter book, just for my own gratification. It is a soothing diversion when I get tired of the cramped typing I do for hours on end.

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First, I apologize for the irregularities of meter and rhyme in this thing. Secondly, I apologize for posting it on this most serious and erudite of writing sites. And finally, a little explanation. For several years I worked on this thing as a country song and then as a poem. It's hard to see the investment of intellect and dedication, I know, but it's there. Or here. This is especially for Memphis Trace. Comments always welcome. Please be gentle.

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Hailey and Beth were once best friends. Since Beth fell in love with a popular boy, she ditched Hailey for a taste of popularity. Hailey copes by listening to music, especially a band that her father is the lead singer of. All her life she's dreamt of meeting him, but her mother's sensitivity on the subject has prevented her from ever seeing him in concert. No one understands her need for music, until David. He's a bad boy that she spent all senior year avoiding, but when he starts to creep under her skin, she can't shake him. Soon, he becomes her best friend, even better than Beth ever was. He's the only one she can talk to about music and her dad. But he's made it clear that he wants to add 'benefits' to their friendship, without taking that step into a dating relationship; which is something she is opposed to, but tempted to fall into. Looking for whether this story is identifiable. Are the characters likeable? Can you feel the conflicts in Hailey's life? Is this something that you would recommend to a teenager? Adult?

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“Physician, heal thyself,” are words Doctor MacKenzie “Mac” Reardon never thought he would hear although he has seen far too much sickness and death in his thirty years on Earth. The small isolated town of Possum Holler, West Virginia, has suffered numerous tragedies without a doctor and with a hospital that is nearly one hundred miles away. The people are poor and backward. At last, one of their own has managed to become a doctor. Doctor Reardon returns to his hometown to find his own heartache might be something no medicine can heal as he struggles with a narrow-minded community, ignorance, a rocky marriage to a city girl, Felicia Chambry Reardon, and an overwhelming attraction to the new school teacher/principal, Sunny Bankston, at the newly established school. Having met Sunny while in his ER rotation at Cook County Hospital when he was an intern and her having been shot in a school-violence incident, Mac knows the spirit of the woman, a spirit that is more akin to his than the spirit of the woman he married. Mac struggles against overwhelming odds to bring his community into the twenty-first century even as Sunny Bankston battles her own demons, including fighting an attraction to Dr. MacKenzie Reardon. This is a romance that is a bit different. Yes, there is romance of the man/woman kind, but there is also love of community and friendship, driving forces of the story. I want the reader to see growth and change in these characters. I do not want the reader to hate any of them. The main antagonist is a situation of poverty and ignorance, not an individual. All comments welcome.

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A sweeping tale that takes the reader from the mountains of the Southwest to the war-torn coast of Vietnam, and finally to New England. As a lonely teenager Gary meets Kristina Preston, the most stunning girl he has ever seen, and has no idea that his life will be forever changed. We follow Gary’s journey through life-altering twists of fortune that fling him from familiar worlds into others that are unknown and have unpredictable consequences. Along the way, there is adventure, drama, love, loss, sadness, revelations, unexpected events, the growth of wisdom and understanding, and many personal and social changes between the late 1950s, the 1960s, the 1970s, as well as glimpses of Gary's life in the early 2000s. I would appreciate feedback about your overall degree of interest in the story, as well as any other comments that come to mind. Thanks.

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Something different. No format to speak of ... no rhyme nor rhythm! haaaaaa Just love speaking out. How a couple can cherish little moments. You know those don't you? Any feedback will be considered :)

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This is a poem I wrote as a tribute to my mother and father whom are now both deceased, And with the help from a very kind and understanding member of this site who encouraged me to dig down deep and help guide me to write in a less hall markish manor ty very much JBourey, and ty to all the rest who have also had faith in me hope you like this one I dug way down deep..

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This is also a true story, except for a happy ending. I do still have that ring to this day, that I will soon give to my son as a memento that things were not always this way.

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This is the first poem I ever wrote and it is true.

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Title temporary. Work unfinished.. most likely this will be the second verse as don't feel it stands a lone. Just needed to get back in the saddle after yesterday's fiasco of losing one of my best pieces and all forty four reviews! It was like losing a friend! So get back up and post something! As you know I am stepping my writing up or at least making the attempt. I am a serious writer when I am serious!! haaaaaaa So be tough on me. I won't melt.

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Some mornings, it’s impossible to avoid innate human concern. Some days, it transcends one’s own offspring. Some days, given the chaotic time we live in, the concern addresses the all of us.

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lost love and loneliness

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Another acoustic poem I have written, about, love, and seeing it before it's too late.

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my definition of true love in a few short words

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This is dedicated to my father who recently passed away. rest in peace daddy

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What one feels like once they realize they have been betrayed

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How things in our lives change and we don't even realize it until it is too late.

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ODIN! I DON'T HAVE THE TIME TO DO AS YOU ASKED BUT HERE IS A 'QUICKIE!' I WILL WORK ON THE LONGER HEADY PIECE WHEN I CAN GIVE IT ALL THE TIME IT DESERVES. ANY and all feedback is greatly appreciated. This is a ten minute write so be aware it is rushed.

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This is a poem I wrote back in '07 which was later turned into a song...

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A love story between Pierce and Katherine. Pierce loves katherine without quite realizing it, and Kat knows nothing about it. In fact, if she knew, she'd consider it ludicrous. Then Katherine's life changes, inside and out. Searching for her roots, she encounters disappointment, danger and more danger. Luckily, Pierce remains at her side to help her muddle through. Still, can she find her heart...or her way home?

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I tend to write fairly graphic erotica, but posted some of my mild poems here in the erotica section because I wasn’t sure if I could post the way I usually write. I saw some graphitic work here so I got brave and I think I’m all right. It takes me a while after I write something to see the rough spots in the poem. I have only had this 4 or 5 days so I’m not sure yet what I need to change. I know it is a bit long, but with erotica that isn’t so bad. There is no wondering about the so deep meaning hidden in the poetic lines. This is a straight out story, bordering on porn. I usually try to have some story so it isn’t just about sex, even if the story part of the poem is brief. So is there any redeeming value in this poem and what are your general opinions. Is this poem, too graphic or is it arousing? Also comments about punctuation and style are also desired. thanks

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A more recent piece I wrote enjoy...

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A short dark poem I wrote a while ago...

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After an absence of two decades, a trip back to his native Romania is both daunting and irresistible to Luca Leontin, a Boston architect, accomplished artist, and libertine. Stirred by memories, he flies to Zurich in August 2001 and embarks on a train bound for Bucharest. During the trip, he becomes enmeshed in the designs of a group of characters that prove to be more than travel companions. Meanwhile, a personal memoir he has been writing, and now rereads between train stops, takes him on a parallel journey into his own past, raising both memories and questions. What has become of Daria, the goddess-like creature of his adolescence? Where is Alecu now, the brilliant artist whom Luca could never quite accept as a mentor? And what of Maia from his college years, who left him for a better prospect? Luca’s homecoming is far from what he’d anticipated. What he remembers as a city of austerity and simple habits has died with the fall of the Iron Curtain. In the new Bucharest, the boulevards shine with glitz, and decayed buildings are veneered with the symbols of Western glamour. Drab-looking restaurants with two-item menus have been replaced with stylish lounges where almond-shaped eyes glimmer in semidarkness and long, bronzed legs set Luca’s heart racing. No sooner does he set foot in his native city than his recent travel companions use his weakness for female beauty to lure him into an undercover operation that nearly costs him his life. Luca is shocked to learn that his ordeal has occurred through the agency of one person—Alecu, the man who has never forgiven him for a long-ago act of audacity. Luca’s brush with death makes him aware that he owes his predicaments to a lifelong indulgence in his desires. As his vacation nears its last days, a shocking confession, an unexpected gift from Alecu, and the aftermath of the 9/11 tragedy bring about the resolution Luca has always yearned for—the awakening of his long-dormant character.

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Shout out of love and appreciation to a strong, beautiful woman in my life.

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What would you see?

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Twelve women are dead! Now, a thirteenth is missing as an unpredictable serial killer stalks the small and usually peaceful town of Eau Bouease, Louisiana, in Lucky Thirteen, a suspense packed thriller coupled with a twist on the impact of love other than romantic love. From a small town in Mississippi, Larkin Sloan is a dedicated teacher who finds herself in a struggle for her life against a sadistic serial killer bent on ritualistic sacrifice. When she awakes chained to a bed by a mysterious man, Larkin realizes she is the thirteenth intended victim in a string of brutal slayings. As Larkin works to convince her captor to set her free, Detective Raiford “Ray” Reynolds investigates twelve horrific murders. He becomes obsessed with finding the thirteenth victim before she becomes another statistic. Along with his temporary partner, Special Agent Christine Milovich, he investigates the thirteenth disappearance of a woman who seems to have nothing in common with the other twelve victims who also have nothing in common other than their murders and discovers the impact of love from a source he never knew existed. Captive, captor, and law enforcement join forces to defeat a sinister killer in a rollercoaster of intrigue, deception, and tumultuous relationships. Lucky Thirteen will keep readers on the edge of their seats anticipating the next turn of events. Any and all comments appreciated.

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Another prompt-driven one for the workshop. Just a teaser. Does it suffice? Should it blossom forth more?

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a painfully short love story...

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Free form verse, mildly erotic. I welcome critical reviews.

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Very short free verse. Trying to give as much visual and emotion as possible, with few words.

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An erotic love poem about loving someone even past death. Detailed criticism encouraged

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Being immersed in each other regardless of others around you Critical feed back encouraged.

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A first person account of a Mennonite, missionary girl, age about seventeen, of her family's trip to the mainland and the consequences of that trip.

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Started a drying paint story, but it came out a poem about painting. And a rather odd one at that. Does it make sense? Or is it too arty? lol ≈≈≈≈ Invented word - clingering = lingering and clinging. ≈≈≈≈ Thanks - måx

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Just words... Anything to make it better or point out where I am missing the boat completely.

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Was enchanted with everyone else's so decided to put my beloved haiku to rest for a small bit and try this on for size.

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Eva Koski receives the dreaded diagnosis of breast cancer. Her husband Finn (From the novel, Fall From Grace) is by her side. Grace Rendeau also appears at the end of this story. Eva's Funeral (a short story posted earlier) would be the third part of this series. Question: For those who are reading Fall From Grace - would it be too much to add this as one of Finn's flashbacks, since the novel includes Mitch's, Bud's and Emanuel's flashbacks as part of the story? Or would it just hopelessly confuse the storyline? ;)

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Part II of the story of Eva's diagnosis and death from breast cancer.

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Conclusion of an 8K word story. A wealthy young man tries to do the right thing. My usual concerns: characterization, pace, plot and do you enjoy the story. All input appreciated

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An 8K word story posted in two parts, but best read continuously. A wealthy young man tries to do the right thing. My usual concerns: characterization, pace, plot, and do you enjoy the story. All input appreciated.

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A supernatural tree in a secluded valley is discovered by the Tierra Tribe. The tree produces a healing fruit, but only after joining with the Tree Woman. The tribe is split and goes to war over whether the Tree Woman should be venerated or vilified.

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◊ - denotes telepathic communication. ≈≈≈≈Developing into a three part novel. Part 2/Chapter 5 - ≈≈≈≈ Part 3/ Chapter ? - The hero returns. ≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈

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Another poem... any feedback is welcome.

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REVISE 09.22.11 ) THANKS - måx ≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈

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REVISE 09.22.11

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The passions of summer remembered.

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A simple theme.

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One decision, though made in love, has consequences that reverberate throughout multiple lives.

Feedback desired: The usual nits, plot holes, etc., but I'm most interested in knowing if the POV shifts work or not - especially for chapter one.

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contemoprary romance. Eric is a businessman and surrogate father to his niece while her mother is in rehab. Vanessa is a business owner struggling to keep the old family business afloat.

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So close to eighteen Ariana Log can't wait to reap the benefits of being an adult, getting away from her alcholic mother is the number one plan but she gets the ball rolling sooner than she expected to. With new ground under her feet and a world of unknown in front of her she begins her journey with a bang of surprises and a bite of adventure.

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This is a romance that is set in the 80's between a young child who meets a young man about to become a mega rock star and a friendship that spans for years.

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Sometimes we just have to write. Nothing terribly important nor worthy of much comment. This is for my grandson Hayden age six. He has such an imagination. I can see him having this conversation. Again.. pure fun for me. Nothing more

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Going for big emotions and distances and essence. Any suggestion to improve are appreciated.

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The Richards' and Miller's have always lived across the street from each other, and have always gotten along. When Ella was ten, it all started going downhill. After all four of her sisters get pregnant with two Richards boys over the span of five years, Ella and Ryan are determined not to become like their elder siblings. But it would be so much easier if they didn't feel anything for each other. Just a few more months and she'll be off to college, and hopefully far away from town, and the Richards' boys. But can she last that long without repeating history?

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This is different for me, but I've always wanted to write something like this. Skylar Crandon is like any rebellious teenage boy, enjoying his youth. Then on his seventeenth birthday, everything in his world changes. His body has transformed, the world around him appears different, and no one is there to answer any questions. Until Eva. She knows what he is, and she offers answers if only he follows her to a secret underground group filled with others who are just like him. A vastly new world is presented to him, along with the knowledge that he could never go back to his normal life again. But he does have a choice. He can stay with people like him, and become what he was always meant to be, or he can live on the run in the world he doesn’t want to give up. He knows he’s never going to stay in a world he was so forcefully pushed into, but the more time he spends learning about them, and spending time with Eva, the more he realizes that his decision is going to impact more than just his life. I changed the rating to R because of graphic violence and the language that Skylar and Aaron use.

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This is the beginning of a modern love story, set in Qatar, a small country in the Middle East and the male protagonist is trying to escape the family pressure to get married. I'd like to know if the story is engaging and if the characters are interesting.

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Rose Schneider's quiet world is shattered one summer day when a friend rapes her. Discovering she is pregnant, Rose runs away to Chicago in an attempt to escape her small-town fate. A story of love and pain, set in the 1980's, it combines romance, drama, suspense, faith....all the stuff I love to read about myself! I'd love to get feedback on my voice, since it is in first person. The main character is 17 when the story starts, but is retelling it from an adult perspective. I'd like the book to appeal to young adults as well as adults. Descriptive words of your take on the "feel" of this novel would be much appreciated, ie., boring, mysterious, exciting, whatever....tell me what you really think while still being polite. Also, I reciprocate reviews for those who review my work. Thanks and enjoy!

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This is the start of a novel I've had in my head for awhile, I am looking for feedback!!Especially when it comes to the title and of course story line, I have placed this as a Restricted rated novel but I'm not sure if it should be...I know at the beginning its not much but the story does get much more adult content wise, please let me know if I should change the rating as we go along!! Thanks in advance to everyone!!

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"...to love others truly, we must first love ourselves." Comments and suggestions appreciated.

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An obese man in search of love finds something else. Does the story hold your interest? How do you feel about the MC? Candid input appreciated.

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In the semi-small town of Cedar Creek, some people don’t care to lock their doors, even though the woods hold secrets and the children are terrified to venture into them. The warm sense of security is shattered for Majesty Alistair, a feisty but grief-stricken teen, when she uncovers a mass murder plot deep in the thick. She struggles to find and defeat the would-be-killers before they act, but they have an agenda far bigger than she ever assumed. Violence rocks the town, leaving residents reeling and drawing Majesty into the middle of it all. With danger always pressing, police seemingly getting nowhere and those closest to her looking guilty, she continues hunting and charges into an evil web, but the truth and her actions threaten to haunt her forever, especially since she’s left with blood on her hands, the blood of someone she loves.

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Shelli anticipated another day of studying in the library but what awaited her there was nothing she could have ever anticipated.

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I am looking for comments from the Christian community on this one. I have posted the story without the Christian slant for anyone outside the Christian community. Any and all comments are appreciated. Also, I'd like to enter this into a contest. Does anyone know of any contests that would be appropriate for this story? I am also looking for an agent and/or publisher. Does anyone have any suggestions? Thank you so much! Radley

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I fell off a 60 foot cliff 11 years ago while hiking alone in the rain forest with my dogs. My back/nerves were never right after that fall. Thank God for modern medicine and a great wife.

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<<<< I'm quite happy for people to dip in and out at random chapters. Please don't feel the need to wade in at the beginning and plough through methodically. This is written for YA in the 15-20 age bracket.>>>> What if 'losing your mind' wasn't just an expression? After Mark disappeared, seventeen year old Louise's world fell apart. When she first meets Jack she has no idea that her brother is still alive and that she can help to get him back. As she enters Jack's world she becomes immersed in danger, but desperate to bring Mark home she fights her fears and the terrifying reality which Jack shows her. Jack thought he was prepared for everything - life has shown him too much - but he wasn't prepared for Louise. All open & honest feedback welcome please :o)

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This is a very short story but one that is fitting for children, teens, and adults of all ages . . . for the little ones, it is a story about the unconditional love and kindness that they get from their grandparents, but for those of us who are older, this simple message has much deeper meaning as we go through the trials of life. I hope you enjoy it and I will appreciate any feedback you may have on it. Thank you - Radley

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Read a short poem by deb and was inspired to find the sunnier light of spring. Fast twenty minute write so any suggestions are welcome for spring tweaking. I dedicate this one to flo & Robert. I must also thank my Golden Retriever (MiniMåx) for great days of Frisbee at Hookipa beach park. -måx

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THE ICEMAN CHECKS OUT is a commercial novel including all things contemporary in business, including murder. Woven throughout, are the book's major themes--corporate intrigue, environmental crime, bloody murder, and a grand, dramatic romance. The most prevalent issues in current businesses are the problem of internal air quality in sealed "sick buildings," business restructure and downsizing as a measure of corporate cost cutting, and the contradictory view of powerful women within the corporate work place. The action takes place over a six-day period, and the epilogue traces the major character's lives six months later. The main protagonist, Lydia Barrett, is young, corporate communicator with a wry sense of humor, biting wit and strong alliances. She works for a multinational chemical company, and is responsible for media relations, both local and nationwide. The Chief Executive Officer of her company, like most senior managers in the first decade of the 21st century is looking to weed out unnecessary jobs, employees and overhead. Although Lydia does not personally fear job loss, she is concerned the impact of a newly hired administrator, R. B. Swaine, (so nicknamed by his peers as “Really Big Swine,”) whose sole mission appears to be downsizing of the corporate departments without concern for employees. Corporate departments, he maintains, spend far more money than they are worth. At issue at the very beginning of the New Year is a three-day conference, held annually for corporate communicators, in order for them to develop strategies for the forthcoming year. Swaine's vehement objection to this conference sets the stage for the initial conflict and a fulminating desire to kill the man by one member of the group. Swaine so completely demoralizes the employees that his demise, as well as the discovery of his murder brings out conflicting, yet emotional responses from those who worked for him. Much of the story line takes place at the conference, held four miles from the site. A relationship between Lydia and a male colleague intensifies during this time, and as more information about Swaine, and those who work for him, comes to light, the reader, I believe, will come to identify with many of the attitudes and defense mechanisms of the characters, evidenced throughout the story. Readers, I believe, will be shocked to learn the identity of the murderer and the astonishing motive for the crimes.

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REVISE IT ∏∏∏ 09.22.11 -måx

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New author Casey Trent has a book deal and a stalker, not bad for a girl who eight months ago no one had even heard of. Thanks to billionaire benefactor, Collin St James and self-appointed publicist Porter Anderson, her life would never be the same again. Thrust into a world reserved for A-list celebrities and wannabe pop stars, Casey learns that life in the fast lane comes at a price. But is it too high for the young girl from Cape Town? Security supremo, Jason Stark is a lethal weapon with an eye for Casey Trent. When the unwanted attentions of Casey’s stalker threaten her life, Jason is tasked with her protection, and whisks her off to the safety of his house on Lake Como and into his arms. But Jason has a secret; a priority mission that has nothing to do with Casey or her stalker. Leaving Casey in the hands of a seemingly capable colleague, Jason turns his focus to the job at hand. That’s when it all goes horribly wrong ..... In a nail-biting climax, a kidnapped Casey fights for her life to learn the true identity of her stalker, and to find her heart in the arms of the man she loves. Manuscript complete at 60,757 words.

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just some common sense.

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Some have been calling these things prosetry which is okay, but an unsettling sounding word. I tried this one with punctuation and that is unsettling to me as well. This might be a true story for the most part. It happened a long time ago. Comments welcome.

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um...yep it's PICTO of a heart! not a happy heart i s'pose but just the way love sometimes goes...

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Second half of a 7K word story, best read continuously. A man looks back on a troubled time in his youth and reflects on the two women who changed him. Input please on pace, narrative voice, characterization, and the ending. Many thanks.

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First half of a 7K word story, best read continuously. A man looks back on a troubled time in his youth and reflects on the two women who changed him. Input please on pace, narrative voice, characterization, and the ending. Many thanks.

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No feedback required... Unless you want to join me in rejoicing the memories, or have just realised how important you are...

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Heartfelt... (er, or maybe a spleen) and to the point. The title says it all. Enjoy

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I'm fussing over line breaks and word choices... help! I like the way it is broken up right now, but does it convey the correct mood? Should there be a more uniform, rhythmic look to it? The breaks are enticement and longing, but do they just appear jagged?

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A story about love, loss, death and damnation. I have revised this entirely with many of the altercations recommended by those who have already reviewed it. I would very much like some fresh feedback.

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A little stream of consciousness poem for today. Comments welcome.

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I would appreciate knowing if this experiment works. I’m contemplating a volume of poems predicated on various themes. Here, as an experiment, I’ve joined the better part of several other poems in an effort to accommodate the title. Let me know if it works. Thank you. BTW, the spacing between lines went a bit funky in places when I posted. Can't seem to remedy it. My apologies.

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Correcting a wrong

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My Apology for posting the wrong piece! My Beluved" was not the piece I meant to post. It was one in many trying a song approach. MY ATTEMPT AT WRITING A SONG My son will be jealous. Many have already read this and the little changes will add nothing so please do not leave a review.

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Love knows no boundaries.

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Any feedback welcome!

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Conclusion of a 9K word story. Same comments as part 1.

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A woman's new year gets off to a very bad start. This is a 9K word story posted in two parts due to word count limitations on posting. But it is a single story with no real divisions. How's the pace? How do you respond to the characters? All input appreciated.

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A bit of an indulgent poem this one... No Need to review if tere is no desire...

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After her grandmother, Jenessa, flees her home in terror, Anna takes over as the caretaker of the property. Only 18 years old, and having just left an abusive home, Anna soon finds that the troubles she'd experienced up to now were nothing compared to what waits for her at The House on Miller Street. Will Anna survive her encounters with the malevolent being? Or will she, too, flee in abject terror?

NOTE: I am new to writing and appreciate any suggestions on nits/flow/characterization, etc.

I am taking all your suggestions very seriously, and will continue to update each chapter as I go along.

Thank you for all your help!

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This work is an attempt to explore the emotions and questions that arise from human tragedy. It raises the questions, but not the answers. While the questions raised are specific to a situation, similar questions are eventually asked by all. //God is defined in the broadest sense--and I hope it causes thoughtful introspection only. There is also a bit of "Eastern Philosophy" in this, as we are all affected by our experiences--and I spent 19 years in Japan and four of my seven children were born there.// A thought to consider; mustn't God loves us all?(regardless of our specific religion, or lack thereof). This is the first in a the first in a series of poems designed to provoke thought.

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This suicide poem of a Samurai is an attempt to underscore the cultural differences between western culture and eastern culture. The west is largely Christian. In Japan Christians amount to less than 3%. The culture is largely agnostic--Buddhism and Shintoism are the primary 'religions' although they are more philosophies than religions.//Imagine not believing in a supreme being and contemplating the end of your life as an absolute ending, by your own hand?//This poem is the creation of the author's imagination and is not at all authentic. I'm not Japanese but I've lived in Japan for nineteen years over a thirty five year period from the mid fifties to the late eighties. I graduated from a Japanese grade school in 1964.//The Japanese have a deep sense of honor. They are particularly sensitive to anything that reflects negatively on themselves, their family or their company. Most suicides in Japan are over issues of honor.//Personally, I'll never forget receiving a hand delivered wedding invitation on Monday, only to have it have it retrieved the following Monday, because the father of the bride opposed the marriage, and executed his wife, son and daughter with a Samurai sword, and then took his own life. The groom was the President of a large Japanese distribution company.//This poem, and many other cultural differences and nuances, are what inspired me to write the novel Executive Samurai.

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Sometimes as a senior citizen I'm questioned or chided about the effects of time on intimate aspects of life. Here is a retort, of sorts. Comments welcome.

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Max was not entirely perfect; his office was a disaster zone. LOL! I don't know how he got anything done in all the papered chaos. I used to tease him laughingly that one day he was going to die and leave me to deal with his office...Max got the last laugh. While sorting through the morass in the early hours of this morning when I couldn't sleep, I found a folder under a pile of books on his desk. In the folder I found little things he had kept: ticket stubs to the opera, receipts from especially romantic dinners out...dated on my birthday or our anniversary, a few photos of us together taken by a stranger he had asked...and this. I had forgotten I had even written this poem...my first to Max. I mailed it to him during the first absence we had to endure after we had fallen in love. He kept it all these years...As I read it i realized the unknown of tomorrow can become the reality of today...the known of yesterday fades into memory...there is only today. i can not control time, but i can choose to be present in each of the moments i have. time lived moment by moment is life lived to the fullest...time lived moment to moment with each moment filled with love is, for me, life lived to the max!

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Finding an old forgotten poem is sometimes like finding lost treasure. This one was buried for eight years. I decided to post it unedited. Comments are appreciated.

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Responding to a comment made by a reviewer when I reviewed her piece on a similar subject, I have endeavoured to write a description of my penis. It is easy enough to use commonly accepted profanities, innuendos and euphemisms, but they offer no challenge to a writer and do not exploit the vast wealth of words, the currency of serious writers, that is the English language. I hope you enjoy my piece. No pun intended. well, perhaps a small one, and again, no pun intended.

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This is not a novel it will be a book of poetry. Spargo Postle and Sara Basrai are in the process of putting a poetry love story project together. All reviews for Sara's poems will be written by her and placed on the site by Spargo. All copyright for the individual poems written by each poet remains the copyright of the writer.

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same as part 1. This is the conclusion of a 6,500 word story.

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A man whose life is in decline gets a chance to make a difference. How do you respond to Bill. Does the story keep you interested and, of course, do you enjoy it? Candid comments please. Thanks.

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I thank the writer who loaned me the title word- yestermorrows. I dreamed about this word. Theme came from a Henry James novel. I had to ask myself, am I this guy? Maybe all men are this guy? ALL revision/comments/suggestions welcome... I'm an amateur at this, but I feel I'm on a good course. =================================================

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I swear, this is the last memoir type poem for a good long while. Comments always welcome.

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love the idea of dancing moonbeams and how love sometimes seems as elusive as only in your dreams...

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A woman, her father, his arm and the man who loves her. How do you respond to the narrator? Do you enjoy the story? Candid input appreciated.

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part 2 (conclusion) of a 6200 word story.

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"Fasten your seatbelt, it's going to be a bumpy ride."--Eve

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A poem I wrote some time ago. I do not normally write poetry, but for some reason, this just popped into my head. Looking for suggestions to make it better, perhaps how to work it into a story rather than just a poem.

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I need some very specific criticism here. I've been told that my characters are flat, and I know I don't do settings well. Please tell me where this stuff should go. I'm trying not to interject these things in such a way to ruin the flow/style of the story. But I haven't figured it out yet. HELP!!!!!!!!!

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--

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Have you ever wanted someone, but could not tell if they felt the same? Bit like dying of thirst I think. Please, cock your hammers and fire away. I welcome all feedback with a grateful heart.

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In a coffee shop a while back I overheard bits and pieces of a conversation between a young man and woman. Jotted some of it down and filled in the rest with conjecture. Sometimes I'm such a voyeur. Comments always welcome.

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In a kids' theater, a puppeteer is in full control of the weekly shows: he makes the puppets, he writes the story, he directs the actors. But is that all he does? The actress who plays the princess in every show begins to feel that his influence on her life goes beyond the stories she enacts on stage. When her lovers start dying, she finally understands - but is that enough? Set on the background of a grim, communist-era Eastern Europe.

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I have edited this piece to include some helpful comments from reviewers. This is solely my opinion. I do not pretend to be an expert in religions. I do however have some experience in teaching CCD and in raising seven children. My hope is that this work may cause reflection and discussion. Assuming one accepts God exists, then there can only be one.

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Any and all

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This poem came to me today. It is the first full length poem I've written in several years. It was almost haunting to write. I had a few remaining points on my account and was moved to share it. All I can ask is that all that see this poem, appreciate today, now, family success and dreams. And the larger excuse is that I miss everyone.

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Just taking a few minutes to appreciate life's little blessings...our children.

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Love and all that nonsense - used the S word. Pretty liteweight, though if you're easily offended pass this by. For others, I know I've messed up the lines here and there and would appreciate some guidance. Otherwise, hope you enjoy it. I enjoyed writing it.

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A story about two brothers, a woman, and love and sacrifice. Is the story enjoyable and engaging? How's the pace? Any frank feedback appreciated.

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Feedback appreciated

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In Search of Mr. Wonderful, The Journey from Myth to Madness Romance / Adult To Invite Love, You Must Love Yourself First Syvanna Lee knows what she wants—an everlasting love, her own “Mr. Wonderful.�? Yet in her precarious quest to find such a man, she refuses to listen to the truth of her inner voice and ends up disappointed time and again. Each “Mr. Somebody�? Syvanna becomes involved with opens a new chapter in her life. Each new relationship causes her to look at herself from a different perspective. Each new lover unveils previously unexplored facets of her own personality. She is ready for love, but will she ever realize that to give love, receive love, or even demand love, she must love herself first? And if Syvanna would only take a moment to listen to her inner voice, she might learn an important truth. As the tale unfolds, an ominous secret from Syvanna’s childhood rises to the surface, a secret that may ultimately kill her. In Search of Mr. Wonderful is a tale of heartbreak, self-destruction, desperation, and, ultimately, of transformation and discovery. Ms. Bouvier has written a novel of intense beauty and introspection that will stay with you long after you’ve turned the final page. REVIEWERS PLEASE NOTE: I will be adding chapters daily until the whole manuscript has been submitted. There are a lot!!! Stay tuned!!

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I was completely in love with the movie Avatar, and have been inspired. I love that line - I see you! It says so much. so any words that could enhance this would be great. Also realized - ME can also represent LOVE. Thank you for reading. :))

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Comments always welcome. This is how we feel when we lose someone close.

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one from the notebook, only a couple years old. comments welcome.

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a poem probably not doing justice to the horror that took place. But still a picture of what happened on calvary's hill

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For me, the only poet who ever got close to truly expressing love for another with mere words was Elizabeth Barrett Browning: "How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the height and depth and breadth my soul can reach..." I wish I had written this, instead here is a small poetic effort in which I try to express my love to my dearest Max...

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love is like a kite in flight but can be quite a fright when you let it go...um yes...it's a PICTO!

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Anything

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This was an article I wrote for my column in our local newspaper for Mother's Day. My mother had a million little sayings for her children that have always made me giggle, but this one has a special place in my heart.

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Memories are precious, especially when the act is difficult to give. To all you fathers who’ve impacted and nurtured your children’s lives by stepping out of your comfort zones to dance, whether it be in mind, body or soul - this one’s for you! You are the choreographer that gives a child the courage to stand on the center stage of life

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The muses call out to us all, for all our lives...

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Brooklyn 1978: People Gioia (Joy-ah) knew didn’t travel, so she is shocked to hear they were going to Sicily. They arrive at their rich aunt and uncle’s house with high expectations, only to find it’s nothing like they imagined. It was worse. They are poor and living in a crumbling villa. Her mother, who is easily impressed with money, learns the couple gave all their assets away. But to who? And what’s left for her? As Gioia begins to fall in love with her gorgeous cousin, she finds herself struggling with moral concerns. It's good to be back, thanks for the push Wiggy dear!!!! Promise to return the favor for all reviews, I was rushing to get this in on time. Thank you reading about Gioia XOXOX

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Any and all

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The war over Wyoming land rights did not begin with the lynching of Jim Averell and “Cattle�? Kate Watson in 1889, nor did it end with the Butch and Sundance-style execution of Nate Champion outside his KC Ranch cabin in 1892. Those whose generations have lived in the Cowboy State know that land counts for much and family can be a secondary thing. When Sheriff John Pruett’s wife of 44 years is murdered by her own brother in the whirlwind of a family feud over precious mineral rights in the gas boom of the 2000’s, he will face not only a test of professional mettle, but also a formidable reconciliation with both his faith and his own flesh and blood—Pruett will ultimately battle his child, his town, his ghosts, and his God. This is a tale of twisted, hardscrabble greed set against the majesty of one of the last, true American paradises.

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Anabeth Sinclaire is content to write her romance novels and enjoy her garden. Life is good except for one particular thorn in her side, rival romance novelist, Lliam Alexander. Can these two feuding novelist find the love they are both looking for or will they kill each other first? This is a very rough draft so feel free to tear it to shreds...lol!

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Jake Wilson lives a life very much to himself. He seems content enough. He is close with his sister, Michelle. And his best-friend Alex is a pickup artist that tries to bring the best (or worst) out of Jake. And he has a decent enough job, which he only hates most of the time. Everything seems to be fine until a series of events leads Jake to question who he is. He meets the girl of his dreams, Chelsea. He receives a concussion. His ex-girlfriend, Rebekah, comes back into his life. His estranged father dies. And Jake's life spins out of control. But after receiving the concussion, Jake begins to see the masks he wears, and he begins to feel a burning in his stomach. It is at this moment that Jake begins the strenuous journey of self-discovery.

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I'd better explain a couple of things which may have you scratching your head. Muti = Af for medicine, poison, etc etc. Sun-downer = a drink (or 3) imbibed at about the time the sun’s going down, being 5:30 – 6:30 around these parts. I look forward to comments.

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Memories of childhood past. Where peace but for a moment could be found. Any and all feedback is more than welcomed. This is was really rough and may still need work but hoping to learn if emotionally strong while not cutesy. Let me know your feelings. This is about a real willow tree at my "Big Mom's' home.. It was my sanctuary so many times.

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Just days ago, Madelyn Jacobs thought not getting into any of her top three colleges or snagging the guy who serenaded the summer stars were the biggest nightmares in her life. That was before being raped by her best friend’s boyfriend. That was before being put in a coma by the jealous bitch when she misinterpreted the scene. That was before trying to function after waking up all broken and torn, only to have a demon or something bust into her bedroom and tag her as The Keeper of some freakin’ list.



When the first person of ten dies in her presence, that’s way weird. The second time, it’s bloodcurdling. She can't avoid people, she tries. She can't run, she tries. An unseen hand always ushers her to the next demise, randomly shows her the list, in windows, in mirrors, on scraps of paper, even behind closed lids, and makes her feel more powerless than ever. And the sweet singer she loves now stands at number seven. As tattered as she is, can she find a way to break the curse before others die and the lover of her heart is gone forever?



*Strong language

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My concern with this is it is too predictable. Nothing original? Tried my best to make it my own as this one is personal though will come home to many who read it. Something good can come along and the past can threaten Any and all feedback.. It is written by me and through me as this one I actually sat down and created. May not be a great idea!! haaaaa My muse may not be amused!

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a summary of my evening....first real thing i have posted, be gentle, these are my feelings.

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A fictional story based loosly on actual events and people. Avery is a young woman with the world by the tail. She thinks she is really in love for the first time. She is beautiful and talented, yet scattered. But people and time have a way of changing her plans, even if she has no real plans at all... Please enjoy and review. This is my first real attempt at seroius writting so constructive critism is always welcome.

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Second chances are eye-opening. Sometimes you just need to step back and assess from an observer's point-of-view. Step back and breathe.

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Simple short poem for those alone. So many are quite content in solitude but others are not. The flounder ... feel incomplete. Until the day he or she discovers the truth that one is never alone as love surrounds us all. It is that notion somehow that one must have a 'lover' to be fulfilled. Any and all comments are welcome

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I reposted this to remind everyone that the New Year can represent a new start…..

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3/9- I realize what part of the issh may be-- the stanza breaks are all funky... that's why this reads as one long rant (not necessarily a bad thing)! I tried fixing the breaks. Twice. No luck. Reposting for NPM at FB. maybe it'll look better there. Cross your fingers. It's been awhile, but I'm diving right in-- so the mind is willing but a little obstructed, or at least, the technique's a little rusty. I may have switched the flow a bit, you'll notice, in the way I chose to break each line. Does it still work? Or would a little more uniformity be stronger?

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This work is from the novel, Corporate Samurai "love begets hate, trust begets betrayal, lust leads to death". It attempts to convey the emotions and thoughts, in song form, of a woman Samurai to the one true love of her life--who is also a Samurai. This song is written at a time when she suspects their relationship will not be sustainable, as her lover comes from a much inferior heritage than her own--something her family will not accept.

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Just a piece, no truth in relation to myself. I'm not scared of the dark!

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This is about a lonely girl who sees a ray of hope...all reviews welcome

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Kiel Thrice-Loved reunites with his mother, and expresses his dissatisfaction with her captors . . .(To avoid confusion the squad leader has been given the name Carillon.)

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A sweet way for a man to see his wife...really just an expression of love, any reviews are welcome.

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This is just a quick little love poem about the newness (if that's even a word) of a realtionship.

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A Tale of the Loved.

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With the attack that almost cost her life, Brenna James finds herself in a world that she never expected. Hunted and afraid, she's in for the fight of her life.

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Some words written down is some sort of order. Comments welcome.

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A piece about honesty. You have read all the wonderful silken written poetry about love and all its fire and wonder. Now I invite you to read how it really is..

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As the day of the year approaches where one is challenged to gather and share oft overlooked, but never forgotten, appreciations, I thought these few words might resonate. For many, a muse is a fantasy. For some a reality. This is a dedication to the value, either way.

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Written for a flash contest. I think the story had to be romantic, less than 500 words, and a bridge had to be mentioned. Any sort of comment is welcome.

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2010 Flash Writing Contest Any feedback would be welcome.

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A poem for Vanessa

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Trying for a Tanka

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maybe it's the time of year, time for poetic pondering, i dunno...the dimming glow...just like the twilight...looking back on a love that felt so right but had nowhere to go...

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Same overwritten poem about love and love lost. Old standby when a writer has an itch and needs it scratched! Any and all..feedback. Added punctuation but really don't like using it all the time in poetry. I like the use of ellipsis in voicing a pause.

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Sort of a "stream of consiousness" thing.

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Holy monkey, I just stumbled onto this old piece. I must have been trying to get my wife amorous. lol

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Any and all feedback. Make you think? Make you feel? Make you nauseous! ha... Just having a bit of fun writing something totally romantic. Sort of about me but not a serious loss in the long run. Hurt like hell at time though so does that come through?

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Ulli sent me a magazine with a haunting picture on the front. This is in honor of that picture which I haven't been able to get out of my head. Hope it does it justice! Any and all feedback is welcomed but mostly what emotions were evoked.

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A little something for my dear wife.

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This is a new piece that is short and I hope sweet for erotica. I believe it could use some more character development but wanted to keep things short to get back into the game after a few months away from writing.

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This work is a response to "Why God?". A poem in which a young widow, with a child who's husband was killed in Iraq, challenges God and bares her soul. It is important to read "Why God?" first, to put this response into context. By no means does the author attempt any more than consolidating answers throughout history to mankind's tragedies.

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Thanks to everyone for your very helpful reviews. I revised the story accoringly. Feedback needed: Did I break the dialogue into too many paragraphs? I also combined a couple of sentences. Did that leave me with too many "series" sentences? ie. "She would want to know my new salary, if Mrs.Whipple would still be my secretary, the color scheme of my office, and most importantly, what Mr. Wyatt and his secretary were wearing." Lastly, I'm interested in nits. Your honesty would be greatly appreciated.

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When Maggie Bernett returns to Bonaventure Cemetery to visit her dead husband Clem, she has an experience of a lifetime.

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A strange note sends a mother and son on a journey of discovery.

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This novel takes place in the mid to late 1970's in the US and Japan. Bill Sanford is a young CPA working for the Tennessee Fried Chicken Corporation. He was brought up as a Foreign Service brat and had spent three years in Japan and four years in Europe. He had dreams of an international career but, his wife would have no part of it.// Ray Easton, TFC's Regional VP, Far East, is a cunning scoundrel and consummate liar. Ray is a master of insider trading of stock, and spreads the wealth to gain favors. He has always stayed one step ahead of the law.// Inoue San is an executive with one of Japan's major trading companies. He was a war hero who had been captured on Saipan and learned English from a U.S. Marine Officer. He launches a plot to bring a major U.S. fast food company into the Japanese market, relying on a high school chum who runs the Osaka Yakuza (mafia) to establish a chain of industrial espionage.// Strategic Planning is taking corporate America by storm. TFC'S CEO has caught the bug. He brings in a hot shot to produce and lead a corporate-wide strategic planning initiative. Resistance to strategic planning and the new hot shot builds, and the corporate politics accelerate, with battle lines being drawn.// Japan has been through post war reconstruction and is becoming a world class economic power. Some of its former military leaders are determined to achieve economically, what they failed to accomplish militarily.// Two trading company giants, Mitsugawa and Sawamura, become embroiled in a struggle for dominance of the exploding, western style, fast food market.// The cultural differences between Japan and the U.S. complicate matters for both sides. The inner workings of Corporate America and Japan are revealed in all their successes, but also, their corruption and greed.// Personal conflicts and deep seated vendettas, some originating during World War II, unfold.// Seduction and love affairs are an integral part of the plot. They illustrate the differences in social views of sexuality between the East and West.// Industrial espionage involving two highly competitive U.S. fast food companies, two Japanese Zaibatsu and the Japanese underworld unfolds.// Many of the key characters were involved in WWII and their individual experiences influence their business behavior.// Cultural differences subtly emerge, and the exploitation of others to achieve one's ends is front and center.// Personal ethics, or the lack there of, and the constant tug between good and evil are interspersed throughout.

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This is my entry for the "The Cloud" writing competition. It was originally over 6000 words, so I had to pare a lot to get it under 5000 (4977). As an eerie and mysterious cloud hovers over Las Vegas for months, it renders havoc on everything and everyone below. In spite of all the tragedy and gloom, love finds a way to grow and flourish. Any and all feedback is appreciated. Thank you in advance.

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Just what people think any feedback would be appreciated

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Necromancer, sequel to the Blood Inheritance, takes us to the darker side of the magical world Alexandria Reed has found herself emmersed in. Her friend's emerging powers as a necromancer has put them all in danger. An old enemy from the Cameron's past has come to exact her revenge. It will take all thier combined skills to stop the ancient evil, but will be enough to save them all?

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A little humorous poem from the chauvinist and conservative that I can sometimes be. Just in fun.

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Warning: This contains Purple! who am I kidding? its a velvet indigo cushion with tassels and gold trim. :D My first title choice was 'What's in a Name?' but it was taken. This place/event/characters are from my fantasy world. Although it does not take place in the current time frame of my novel. I hope you enjoy it.

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Companion poem to previous submission.

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A bit of a change from my usual melancholy. I thought I'd give a love poem a try. Hope it's not too over the top. ;) enjoy!

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A story about loss and gain.

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Chapter 1 of A Lazy Incompetent Life records the birth and pre-school life of the "hero" in Rosewood and Coolangatta/Kirra in south-east Queensland, Australia. It also records the political, economic and social environment which he knew - with increasing sensitivity - up to and including 1927. Later chapters recall the narrator's experiences in World War Two, in love and marriage, in career and in illness and health.

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Synopsis: Phoebe lives a privileged life in a repressed and controlled society until she discovers the husband she thought was dead, is imprisoned by the regime that protects her. She becomes obsessed with his freedom.

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Because this novel does not fit into any specific genre, I am going with Commercial Fiction. It has equal elements of Romance, Love Story and Drama. Suspense and humor are no strangers to the story, either. To me, it is a drama fueled by the quest of two lovers to find one another after a very lengthy separation. Two young lovers, Randy Harris and Brenda Chandler, are separated by totally unexpected circumstances beyond their control. They are taken from their small-towm roots of rural Kansas, Randy to Georgia and Brenda to Texas. The year is 1963. Weeks turn into months, months into years. Each starts a new life of his and her own. However, rarely does one completley forget about the other. But Randy and Brenda face substantial, and sometimes horrific, challenges in their new, seaparate lives. The drama and tension hover around every corner. Randy goes to jail, charged with the brutal slaying of his dearest friend. And that's not the only major trauma in his young life. Brenda's life moves in a most unexpected direction for a naive farm girl. She has her own tragedy to deal with. The untimely deaths of people they love torment both of them. In Brenda's case, the death leaves her with a heavy burden of guilt she can't seem to shake. Each enjoys moments of joy and rewards. But it seems there is always something lurking around the corner that wants to dampen those moments. But you will fall in love with the quirky humor of old Pop Johnson and the compassion of Bruce Armstrong. They are sure to make you smile between the tragedies and challenges. And there are a couple of places where you might want to have a Kleenex handy. Pop's story of his early days in Georgie will almost certainky bring a tear to your eyes. Randy's return from Vietnam culminates in a gut-wrenching discovery. There is quite an unexpected twist at the end. You probably won't see it coming! All comments, suggestions and nits are welcome. And thanks in advance for your time to read and comment, should you choose to. PS: The improper grammar in some of the dialougue is intentional.

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A Re-boot of the Rhiannon series. It rewrites the first Rhiannon story (published elsewhere)The Gorgon. It is deliberately inconsistent with other stories published or workshopped. Rhiannon is more complicated, Rosalyn has a different status, it is in 3rd person. It has themes of transformation,the loss and reclamation of important things (although they are not what the characters or readers think at first). A word on its setting: this is not set in medieval Europe. It takes place on a world that is about 11th century in terms of its social and technological development, but is 30 lightyears away from Earth, which is occupied by a world (Terra) with 21st century development. It takes place in our future, but in that world's (worlds') past. One culture is corrupted by Terran society, others are not. Oddities like the characters using slang from the US c. 2009 is thus explained. It is the tale of the fall and rise of Rhiannon, the ever so great descendent of the lengendary woman/goddess of the same name. All feedback is appreciated. Thank you.

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A moment on Ali's 10th birthday that was very profound. I wanted to document it.

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This is the third installment of the story of my marriage and the struggles I am going through to help salvage it. In this installment I discuss where we are three months into the process.

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This past winter we spent some time in the Adirondack Mountains and I wrote this after a long walk.

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I wrote this while going through my divorce a couple of years ago. It was a great catharsis but I am not sure about the writing. The initiating event was taken from my work as an air traffic controller. I just built a story around it. Feedback on characters and whether or not they need to be developed further would be appreciated. And just overall feedback about the story would be great also.

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The exquisitely beautiful Angelica (Angie) is voyaging by great ocean-liner to rejoin her husband Jeremy (Jemmy) after five months' separation.

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Gioia (Joy-ah) got Karl Baron’s attention. She’s hot, young and gorgeous, a perfect match for movie star royalty like Karl, but is he willing to wait in line with all the men in Gioia’s colorful life? With her first screenplay ready to roll, Gioia travels to her grandparent’s hometown in Sicily. All the problems she left there twelve years ago, come back to haunt her. And some new troubles follow her there.

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This is the second piece in a series about the break down of my marriage. I anticipate a few more essays in this series. I would love to get feedback on the personal nature of this memoir.

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My wife has multiple sclerosis. it's a bit of a bummer, especially as she used to be a graphic designer

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IF YOU'RE JUST STARTING THIS NOVEL, PLEASE GO TO THE ORIGINAL POSTING --ECHOSIS--AS THE FINAL DRAFT IS BEING CONTINUED THERE. IF YOU'VE NOT COMPLETED THE 17 CHAPTERS HERE, GO TO THE ORIGINAL, AS THE REDUX CHAPTERS HAVE BEEN POSTED THERE, AND FROM 17 ON, ALL REVISED CHAPTERS WILL CONTINUE WITH THAT LISTING. THANK YOU.

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My true story of my love life and my daily walk in love and passion

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This is a story of bullies, revenge and a class reunion all entangled in a twisted love story. Oh and there might be a bit of redemption in there too... I have more chapters coming... :-)

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Mollie and Jim are moving in together. Can their love for each other overcome the scars from the past?

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...yes this is a PICTO of lips and what you might find in a kiss like this!!

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This song is dedicated to my recently deceased mother. I wrote it as a testament of my grief and despair. I plan to rewrite this as a traditionally metered ballad some day. As usual, ANY and ALL feedback is appreciated and desired, so please take a bit more time and review while you view.

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With Valentine's Day upon us and its celebration mercilessly becoming more and more a senseless exercise in commercialism, I thought it perhaps appropriate to lay out some questioning ideas relative to its supposed theme...romance.

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This is a story about a couple away from the kids and alone in the big city for the first time in almost twenty years. it is a tale of love, sex, and joy.

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Say what you will: PS - I appreciate it all..

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Summary: Woman involved in car accident - any critique gratefully received.

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ok so....this is a flaming PICTO!....the flickering flame of a candle perhaps....or maybe a fickle flame that was too hot to handle?....beware cos one might burn your fingers whereas the other might give you heartburn if the memory lingers!!

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Some things lead to others. A friend sent a long email and photos of himself kiteboarding. I meant to write a haiku about the pictures, the water, the colors, how I imagined it felt to be right there-- and this intercepted those thoughts. Strange.

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First attempt at a form of poetry I truly know nothing about. This is for a writer who prodded me enough to try. Haiku for J Michael Vernon..

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This is the story of the Fortners, who rise from the ashes of the Civil War to become major landholders in the wilderness of Florida. Loosely based on the lives of my great-grandparents, George and Dorothy Fortner, it's the story of men and women making the transition from war to peace, facing tragedy and loss with love and passion as they discover what it takes to turn an American dream into reality. I'm reposting this because crazeesharon asked what happened to this story. Thanks for taking an interest in this story.

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The humorous story of an attractive forty-something woman, labeled by some in society as a "cougar," trying to succeed as the public relations manager to a sex-crazed Mayor in the world of Philadelphia's city politics. The wild antics of her dates, co-workers, and especially the mayor, add up as she tries to keep the mayor out of trouble and successfully land her dream job as a White House public relations manager. Things really get out of control when a religious foreign diplomat comes to town, accompanied by his beautiful twenty-two year old "party down" daughter.

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Does this stand on its own? Ending abrupt? A girl leaves a boy after a wild night together.

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I said I'd take a break and just review, but I couldn't help it. I was experimenting, playing around with this form. It's that common rut that a person in love (lust?) falls into-- everyone but you can see what a loser your lover is, and can't figure why you don't leave the jerk already. A little addiction, perhaps? I was having a conversation with a friend who was telling me about his latest crush, and I just got to thinking about all the people, and all the relationship woes of unevenly matched pairs. **26 Aug 08:I'm fiercely holding on to the repetitions, because I believe they are essential to the slightly crazed, deeply addicted feel. What I missed though, in the original version, was the breaks between the stanzas. Pehaps this may alleviate (some of) that rushing, confusing, dizzying look of the poem. If not, then it's not meant to be a pantoum-- I'll pare it down.

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CAUTION: YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO READ THIS IMMEDIATELY PRIOR TO DINNER, OR LUNCH, OR... Just a silly little thing that crossed my mind. After reading this, you'll probably wonder if I even have a mind! It's totally tasteless and has no redeeming qualities what so ever. But, I follow my muse...she insists! Feedback? Well, if you're desperate for credits!

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Novel written like a transcript...1/4 of the way through chapter one, it will become easier to read... Two years ago, twenty-nine year old Jayne, a reclusive writer and single mom, suffered a tragedy. After two years and many therapy sessions later, she decides to move to London to continue her writing there. And, in the process move on with her life. By the way, this book will not be in chapters it will be by conversation. Each conversation is its own chapter so on this site, each chapter might have more than one conversation.

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This is a different poetic style for me. Does it work for you?

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As my oldest God Daughter (that I helped raise, I'm the only father figure she's had) prepares to go to Middle School, I am feeling nervous. So I wrote this for her.

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This is my entry for the My Writing Life contest. Parts have been borrowed from my memoir, Root Hog or Die. Any suggestions for improvement will be appreciated. Thanks.

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Become what you detest most (meant in humour. Maybe).

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There came a specific moment when I knew what I wanted to do with the rest of my life.

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My journey into the world of writing how one person inspired and lit the fire but also snuffed the flame. Finding my voice Listening harder, watching closer, feeling textures emotionally reaching hope thanksgiving for help on site. Comparing work and seeing if improving. Open and honest opinions as am taking this seriously and honestly due to a reviewer and his courage to point out the flaws.

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Is the verb tense right? This is about when something happens that you don't expect that changes everything and it is so much better because it is unexpected.

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A poem of someone who tries to show their love in in hidden gestures.

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Stanza three--is the last line workable? Is it too much alliteration? This is a play on the idea of the Tinman.

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Something wrote forty years ago and tucked in a bible. It is crude as just wanted to release pain and disappointment once again at unreturned love. I am not going to edit it or change it's form as this was who I was then and to change it would lose something of me!

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The first three chapters have been revised and rearranged for the strongest start competition. The novel is posted in its entirety so you may read at your leisure (DISABLED CHAPTERS WILL BE ENABLED FOR ANY NEW REVIEWERS GOING BEYOND CHAPTER 3). Old reviews will not always match up with the chapter that it is attached to. This is in essence a memoir of my life in an orphanage, but I use composite characters and am not sure it qualifies as "memoir" for the contest. I will let the judges decide that. I hope this final go through will make it ready to publish, so any comments whatsoever will be appreciated. Especially interested in the new flow pattern. Opinions? Thanks for your help and advice.

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This is just an observation of a picture of my son,his wife and my grandson. Her gaze is hypnotic and you just want to know what she is thinking. Just want feedback on how it reads, is it clear, am I doing any better with punctuation!!!

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Words and intimacy...what a combination

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Just thinkin' bout my baby one night.

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I was listening to John Coltrane's immortal disc "A Love Supreme", and decided to add a poetic twist. During the time of this record, Coltrane was going through a spiritual awakening...this is my take on it.

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This is just a loving message to a hurting heart. It can be a message to many who too have experience this heartache. I have taken the liberty to grow quiet and try to put myself in the beautiful spirit of the one called Raven. It is a responsibility I don't take lightly but if I go deep enough, try to change places and hear the messages is painful yet beautiful as in Cool Breeze Blowing. The remaining partner is this love story said it was exacting like hearing from his beloved.

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Had some leftovers from another piece and decided to put them to good use.

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This is a work about the person who loved me the most as a child.. who taught me the most and provided a safe haven where I could be a child. It is full of small simplistic acts that made me whole.

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Making love with words...

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Once again i am not sure where to put this. it is a love story..it is the truth A true love story that we all would hope to experience. I knew both parties and dearly loved them both. They taught me what love should be and I have never experienced. We lost one of my heroes to ALS not so long ago. I wrote this as a tribute to this beautiful man. I tried to climb into his soul and tell him what he wanted to say to those he left behind. especially his partner. I only pray I did him juctice.

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Can I describe it in deeper strokes? Let me know if this is too bland, too broad.

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Remembering a happy moment in the past.

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no....not a PICTO!!! just an ordinary poem on a highly original subject that no one has ever thought to write about before! ha!

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When the agony of heartbreak festers and just won't go away. Please let me know if you see the lines broken up differently. Thank you.

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This piece is only an attempt to explore some of the continuing, unanswerable questions that face mankind. The stated answers are only intended to cause the reader to think. Obviously these questions have faced mankind since conscience thought became possible.

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This is my first attempt at a novel and I am certainly open to any criticism. The novel begins in January 1924 a little less than 60 years after the Civil war and five years before the Great Depression. The main character is getting married today. She describes her home, her life to this date in some of her mannerisms and dialog because she is expecting to take on a totally new life after the wedding vows. She breaks Southern Tradition is sort of a feminist. There is an element of super natural in each chapter. It is so subtle until it may not be apparent until much later in the book.

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Ever imagine what a poet dreams?

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Somewhere between last night and this morning love lay in shambles beneath our feet.

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Just one musing over love.

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This is a story about my mother who died two years ago. I had a difficult time writing this and Whatta spent a great deal of time helping me improve it. Thank you, Mitch.

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Reflections of steppin out and takin in the sights and sounds of the jazz scene.

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This is the first draft of The Erstwhile Hearts Guild Chapter 3. This story is coming to me sort of haphazardly,(hence no Chapter 2 yet) but I take it with me everywhere. Any feedback is helpful. Thank you in advance

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There's nothing quite like waking up on a Sunday morning with love by your side.

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Redemption, Arkansas is a small country town where things aren't always what they seem and the people never are...

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This is a story about the relationship between tragedy and necessity, and the changes we make to keep breathing.

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Chris began to question the wisdom of this trip. The familiar crunching sound of tires on the gravel driveway gave away her surprise arrival. She had planned to arrive undetected, take a look around at her former life, and if necessary, leave undetected. As she pulled up to the once-white, house with the slanted front porch and broken screen door, she was at once joyfully nostalgic and severely repulsed. Before Chris could turn off the engine and step out onto the gravel and oil driveway, Ma was already waving from the window in the big bedroom upstairs. Chris shook her head when she notice Ma wearing the same faded red, pansy-printed house dress she was wearing exactly one year before on Easter Sunday and likely every other Sunday for the last thirty years or more. The hem of this dress must have been re-sewn by Ma’s plump hands a hundred times or more and the buttons were a mere rumor, replaced by multi-colored diaper pins. Even without seeing it now, Chris could describe each frayed piece of the fabric, not only because she seen it in her mind whenever she pictured Ma, but because she’d spent so much time as a child, hiding from the world on underneath it. They met inside the house, at the bottom of the stairs and greeted one another the way they always had. No “I love you,�? or “good to see you.�? No touching moment and definitely no embracing, just right to the business at hand – avoidance. “Lawd chile, I ain’t know who dat was pullin’ in my driveway all fast.�? Ma said, barely stopping at the foot of the staircase. “Uhn, uhn, uhn. What you doin’ wit’ ya hair now?�? “All that money, - cant you pay somebody to do something with that hair?�? Chris sighed. “It’s called the natural look Ma, and I did pay somebody to do this.�? Uhn, we’ll you done thrown dat money away. Look like a natural mess to me. I’ put a pressin comb on it fo’ ya fo’ free.�? Ma laughed. “Lawd have mercy, now I got to go upstairs an’ put some clean sheets on dat bed. Go on out back and say somethin’ to Dad.�? Chris walked through the old house, through the dog’s room on the back porch and out into the back yard where Dad sat atop his ancient, red, riding mower, mowing and drinking what was almost surely corn liquor, wrapped in a brown paper bag. “Hey there, Lil Bit, what you doin’ here? Dad slurred. “You done drove all the way from New York City to help me cut all this grass.�? All morning, Chris sat in the kitchen with Ma snapping peas, peeling potatoes and soaking greens. “You listen here girl, now I ain’t gonna have none of that mess you pull last year at my Easter table, you hear me?�? Ma warned. “What’s past is past.�? “Now, ya Mama an’ them comin.’�? “Again, Ma, she is not my Mama�? Chris said. “Well, she carried ya ‘round in her fo’ nine mont’s di’nt she?�? Ma exclaimed. Chris started, “Ma, but she never did nothing for me….�? At this, Chris was immediately shocked by her improper language, and how easily it came back to her. “She my daughter, and yo’ mama, an’ this is my house and I say she’ comin’ here to have Easter dinner wit’ us, now you just keep ya mouth shut if ya aint got nothing nice to say, hear.�? ‘Ma, if she brings him again, I can’t sit at the table and act like everything is ok.�? Chris explained. Ma fidgeted. “Don’t you say it.�? Suddenly, Chris felt possessed. “What, Ma, that he raped me and my Mama was too high to do anything?�? Ma looked around for something to hold on to and settled on a bag of flour on the. Ma said, “Don’t ya talk with dat nasty mouth in my house girl, now, I jus’ ain’t gon’ have it.�? Brushing flour off her dress, Ma quietly demanded, “Now make yourself useful and go set the table.�?

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It's my wife's birthday. Happy birthday, honey.

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This love letter is from a woman Samurai to her life's only love. She is forced by tradition and 'bushido', (the Samurai's code of honor), to obey her brother's demand that she end this relationship, with an inferior Samurai, forever. Her purpose in this letter is to confirm her undying love and devotion for her lover, while appealing to his sense of honor to understand she has no choice but to comply. This poem is part of the novel Corporate Samurai, which attempts, in part, to provide some insight into the eastern way of thinking.

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...ok, admittedly not a perfect ring but this is supposedly a PICTO of that band-of-gold worn third finger left hand......

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The working title of this novel is Corporate Samurai "love begets hate, trust begets betrayal, lust leads to death"// This novel takes place in the mid to late 1970's in the US and Japan. Bill Sanford is a young CPA working for the Kentucky Fried Chicken Corporation. He was brought up as a Foreign Service brat and had spent three years in Japan. He had dreams of an international career but, his wife would have no part of it.// Ray Easton, KFC's Regional VP, Far East, is a cunning scoundrel and consummate liar. Ray is a master of insider trading of stock, and spreads the wealth to gain favors. He has always stayed one step ahead of the law.// Mike Adachi is an executive with one of Japan's major trading companies. He was raised in San Francisco and speaks English as a native. He launches a plot to bring a major US fast food company into the Japanese market, relying on a complex chain of industrial espionage.// Strategic Planning is taking corporate America by storm. KFC'S CEO has caught the bug. He brings in two hot shots to produce and lead a corporate-wide Strategic Planning initiative. Resistance to strategic planning and the new hot shots builds, and the corporate politics accelerate, with battle lines being drawn.// Japan has been through post war reconstruction and is becoming a world class economic power. Some of its former military leaders are determined to achieve economically, what they failed to accomplish militarily.// Two trading company giants, Mitsubishi and Sumitomo, become embroiled in a struggle for dominance of the exploding, western style, fast food market.// The cultural differences between Japan and the US complicate matters for both sides. The inner workings of Corporate America and Japan are revealed in all their successes, but also, their corruption and greed.// Personal conflicts and deep seated vendettas, some originating during World War II, unfold.// Seduction and love affairs are an integral part of the plot. They illustrate the differences in social views of sexuality between the East and West.// Industrial espionage involving two highly competitive US fast food companies, two Japanese Zaibatsu and the Japanese and Mexican underworld unfolds.//The head of the Yakuza (Japanese mafia)is an effective eliminator of problem people.// Many of the key characters were involved in WWII and their individual experiences influence their business behavior.// Cultural differences subtly emerge, and the exploitation of others to achieve one's ends is front and center.// Personal ethics, or the lack there of, and the constant tug between good and evil are interspersed throughout. View table of contents..

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This is my attempt at a villanelle in iambic tetrameter. I know nothing about poetry, so I hope I got this right. This rigid poetry consists of 19 lines: 5 tercets and 1 quatrain. The 1st line of the 1st tercet has to be the last of the 2nd and 4th. The last line of the 1st tercet has to be the last of the 3rd and 5th. Then those two repeated lines have to end the quatrain. The rhyming structure is basically like a stack of Oreos, all the chocolate cookies have to rhyme, and all the cream filling has to rhyme. And at the very bottom is an extra chocolate piece. :)

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