Content: adventure

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This is a spoof of the career of a notorious fugitive and his mistress and of the attempts of the FBI to find them, and also of aspects of contemporary U.S. life such as our preoccupation with and ignorance of nutrition and exercise, and a banking industry that facilitates easy movement of proceeds from criminal activity. Although I hope it is funny, I changed the genre from humor to literary fiction because deeper meaning emerged in the first 18 chapters. I very much appreciated reviews on the first submission, hope this is improved, and welcome any and all suggestions.

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Providence is the story of an American tall ship's voyage around Cape Horn to San Francisco. The story is set in 1872. It is also a story about character transformation. I wrote the story to appeal to the readership established by the late Patrick O'Brian. If he were alive, I hope he would approve of my effort as his inspiration is very evident. My goal is to set the reader on board the deck of an American clipper. I want my reader to not only imagine being there, but to also imagine working the ship and feeling the courage of the men who manned her. The characters in Providence are unique. This novel is about heroism, but courage is not limited to physical bravery in Providence. Kayleigh MacKenna, my heroine, is as much a hero as the ship's captain. Her story will appeal to men and women alike. The lyrical beauty and awesome might of the sea should appeal to everyone. It has for centuries. This novel was meant to accompany a good bottle of wine, an easy chair, and an evening away from the TV and the 21st Century. Escape awhile. Tell me if you do so.

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Terrorcruise, a science fiction adventure, is the story of Tac-Team Captain Axel Fargo's quest to hunt down and kill the terrorist who murdered Axel's wife- a man the Unity Sphere thinks is dead; the terrorist Hetz, who fell before the Unity Fleet once but survived, thanks to powerful new technology, and is set to resume his murderous ways; and Maurel Bright, daughter of one of the Sphere's most powerful businessmen and a target in her own right, simply for being who she is. Terrorcruise is a finished novel in the 105,000 word range. I have never presented it for review in its entirety before and as I earn the credits, hope to post it here for your critiquing pleasure. Any criticism, good or bad, will be appreciated.

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A Gypsy Among Gypsies is the story of my nomadic adolescence, living by my wits in the age of sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll. While American youth were growing their hair, experimenting with psychotropic drugs and protesting the Vietnam War, I was running for my life to Alaska, hoping to outdistance my troubled past and vanquish the demons in my head. I knew my past was dark, but I did not know it all. The storyline is a progressive quest for adventure, self-discovery, and enlightenment with more twists and turns than a Texas sidewinder: from a six-month cruise in the Caribbean to a county jail in California; from a cabin in the Sierra Nevada to a remote river camp in the Trinity Mountains; from the Aleutian Islands to Hawaii. Wrapped in a riddle with psychological and paranormal overtones, the story embodies the adolescent spirit of romance, rebellion and idealism, and celebrates the contention that given even less than half a chance, life not only endures...it prevails.

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Knighthawk and I are co-writing this "urban fantasy" novel. The main character (Oli) is from my previous novel which some of you may have reviewed. This is a whole new story. We're doing a lot of front-end work - establishing three acts, outlining the scenes, developing and nailing down character arcs and through-lines before doing the real nitty gritty of developing the prose. But we were eager to see your reaction to the "tone" of the story, the prose style, and if you find it compelling. In other words, would you buy it? Any and all feeback is welcomed.

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This is a mystery/thriller. A second novel utilizing the same protagonists is almost complete, and a third has been outlined. I have two offers of publication with small presses, one a POD internet publisher. I would appreciate your feedback. Golden Conspiracy: Synopsis In 1503, a Spanish castaway washes up on the island of Molokai, thousands of miles from where any European has ever sailed. His crescent-shaped gold medallion is inscribed with a riddle pointing the way to plundered gold. Captured by a young warrior, he must fight a new battle for survival. Five centuries later, Spanish historian Ricardo Montoya is contracted to translate the recently discovered log of the Columbus-era guardian ship Santa Ynez, which he then compares with the navigator’s diary from the treasure ship Solitario. Both documents report that the Solitario burned and sank off the Florida-Georgia coast in 1501 after “the devil’s minions” possessed the crew. Confirming his employer’s suspicion of a long-ago conspiracy to plunder the gold, Montoya discovers an article in the New York Times reporting the recent find of a Spanish gold cross, circa early sixteenth century, in an excavation on Molokai, and believes it could be a link to the Solitario’s gold. In hock to dangerous people for his huge gambling losses, Montoya sells Jacsen Kidd and Pericles Schmoond’s confidential information to Louis Damia, a ruthless antiquities collector and the nemesis of Jac’s father, Mandrago Kidd. Kidd, descendant of the infamous Scots pirate, and his partner, gastronome Pericles Schmoond, begin to unravel the deception. In a north Florida coastal village, they are covertly followed by an old enemy of Jac’s, long thought dead. Then, in the Hawaiian Islands, Peri’s nephew, archeologist Michael Schmoond, finds a revelation in a traditional chant. This leads him to excavate a petroglyph depicting an encounter on Molokai between a warrior named Liko and a white “god” wearing the sun around his neck. Michael believes that the depiction of the sun is a gold medallion that may contain a clue to the gold’s location. Nicole Thomas, Damia’s comely operative, is sent to uncover information from Jac, but passion sparks between them, and before Nikki can disclose her deception, she finds her boss murdered. Near an ancient village in Molokai’s Halawa Valley, Jac and Peri enter a savage past as they trace the stranger’s footsteps using clues from the chant. Lurking nearby is former KGB operative Garth Moska, who has vowed to kill Jac and take the gold. After a harrowing struggle while swimming through a maze of lava tubes and caverns, Jac uncovers the Spaniard’s remains and unearths the inscribed medallion. Moska kidnaps Nicole and Kimo, the party’s local Hawaiian guide, and though Jac and Peri manage to free her, Moska gets away. With Moska in relentless pursuit, Peri, Michael, Jac, and Jac’s, father Mandrago Kidd, find themselves entangled in a maze of treachery and murder. Following the clues in the riddle, they sail to the Brazilian island of Fernando de Norhona, where Jac begins to unravel the mystery. Soon, though, he faces daunting odds to save his friends’ lives. In an encounter with Moska, Peri is gravely wounded while trying to save Jac’s life. Jac and Moska drop from a cliff into the sea, and in what seems a final dead end, a simple gust of wind provides the final clue, leading the survivors to the gold. Two hundred miles away, near Recife on the Brazilian mainland, a light plane lands with another survivor of the ordeal on Fernando de Norhona. Moska must wait for another day to kill the hated Jacsen Kidd. Golden Conspiracy(excerpt) Prologue November 1503 Molokai, Hawaiian Islands Felipe de Córdoba groaned, feeling as if someone had poured hot gravel under his eyelids. He tried to blink away the salty crust that stuck to his lashes and blurred his vision. He could hear the muted crash of waves. Was he still in the cursed sea, floundering and gasping for air? Or perhaps he was already dead. But then, the dead didn’t feel pain like this . . . unless he had been cast into the inferno. And yet, he saw colors—blue, green, and . . . what was this? White sand . . . “Gracias . . . mi . . . Sal . . . vador . . .” Just saying the words aloud made his cracked lips sting. Gagging and coughing, he retched clear bile and seawater onto the sand. He had never felt such thirst. If the devil should appear to him, he would sell his soul this instant for a bellyful of water. He rolled over, feeling the solid beach beneath him. Where . . . ? Birds sang in the deep greenness that stretched away from the sea. There lay salvation, or at least the hope of it . . . shade, and perhaps even water! Felipe pushed up onto his knees, struggling to stand, but tumbled facedown in the sand. Reaching out in front of him, he sank his fingers into the sand and began to claw his way forward. Every beat of his heart pulsed in the jellyfish stings that he felt as meandering lines of pure fire. Ahead, the lush green foliage tantalized him, drawing him on. But his strength was gone. He grew dizzy. . . . And there Felipe de Córdoba collapsed, with one hand barely touching the rough trunk of a coco palm. * * * Liko surveyed the stone fish trap he had built. He was pleased, for it had held together through the high tide. Recalling the days of lugging and placing each lava rock so that it fit together perfectly to catch and hold the sacred moi, he felt proud. His ali’i would be pleased. Having lived through only eighteen great storms, already Liko was a prominent warrior who had raised his family’s status. He examined the wall he had built enclosing the stone tide pool. Seeing that none of the rocks had been dislodged by the waves, he stepped out into the limpid, knee-deep water and threw his net. It held two plump moi, fit for the ali’i’s table. He felt the breeze against his wet skin and turned to study the horizon. The wind had kicked up, stinging his face with tiny sand particles, and in the distance he could see a furious little god approaching his island, looking for a quarrel. Fearful of being hit by one of the god’s killing shafts of light, he left the pond for the shelter of the jungle. Liko remembered a similar day, when he was half his present age, playing on the beach, as darkness signaled the coming of another angry god. A warrior had run out from the cover of the palms and onto the open beach to hurry the children to cover, and the god had struck him dead with a bolt of light. Squinting to keep the blowing sand out of his eyes, Liko scanned beyond the long stretch of pale sand for any sign of an invasion from the neighboring islands. Even though the war with the big island had been over for several moons, the peace was a fitful one, and like all the warriors in his clan, Liko remained vigilant. The angry roar of the approaching god’s thunder startled Liko, and he remembered what the elders had told him in his lessons: You must learn many things for yourself, young warrior. Learn from everything you see, hear, and touch—from the sky, the water, and the earth. Listen to your father and your grandfathers, gather all you can from their personal stories, and remember them, for they are the keys to your survival. And how right the elders had been, for already the stories had saved his life. Liko shuddered thinking of the recent war, his ordeal and miraculous survival . . . his immortality. Early one morning, before the sun god’s golden eye peered out above the water, Liko and a dozen other warriors from his island had pushed one of ten canoes out into the surf and paddled to the center of the channel, where their enemies from the big island waited. As the two clans came closer, they taunted and jeered each other. Spears flew. The battle had begun. With his island brothers on either side of him, Liko thrust and parried with his koa-wood spear, when an errant wave made him step out onto the outrigger lashing for balance. He had heard the warrior next to him groan as an enemy’s wooden war club, set with shark teeth, caught him in the ribs. And though unhurt himself, Liko could see trickles and ribbons of blood painting the arms, legs, and bare chests of brother and enemy alike around him. But the Molokai warriors stood fast. Liko pivoted sideways to avoid a spear thrust, when the warrior next to him accidentally bumped him. And before he could so much as cry out, he lost his balance and pitched forward into the maelstrom of paddles and weapons and blood-tinged water between the canoes. He saw the first fin break the surface and glide toward him, and he prepared for the awful, rending bite. But he felt only rough skin bump him aside as the shark homed in on the blood of the wounded. Now he could hear a change in the timber of the shouts and screams as the wounded were hit, and red clouds bloomed out from them in the clear water. Though the battle continued to rage above him, Liko forgot about the clubs and spears of the invaders, for something much more terrible was flashing and ripping in the water around him. And as the sharks began their furious feeding and the shrieks and death wails grew louder, Liko prayed and waited to utter his last sound. Tomorrow, when the great golden eye began its journey across the sky, he wondered which of his body parts would be digesting in a shark’s belly and which would wash up on a beach as pale, bloodless shreds to be picked apart by the crabs. With a cry of desperation, he made one final prayer to Mako, the great shark god, who had led his people to these islands all those thousands of moons ago, and Kauhuhu, the god shark who was cared for by the people of the Halawa. Kauhuhu was a man eating shark only when one of the people committed a wrong, and Liko never committed a wrong. He was a good warrior. “Oh, great Mako and Kauhuhu, please spare Liko. I promise never to kill any of your children for the rest of my life, if you will but spare me. Please, great shark gods, bid your children not to eat me. My family needs me.” Liko pleaded, realizing as he said it that this would be no great compromise. He would gladly worship Mako, and Kauhuhu, along with the only other god he truly feared: the great goddess Pele. Strangely, Liko found himself moving away from the sharks. A current was carrying him toward shore. He cried and laughed in the same breath, rejoicing as he raised his eyes reverently toward the sky. The sharks were now behind him, tearing and ripping, ignoring him as if he were a god. Now he was in the surf, and the wave tossed him over its face, pitching and turning him, making him feel as if he were inside a whirlwind, twisting and turning as it carried him toward the beach. Arching his back, he spread his arms, and his palms hit sand. He stood up in the shallows, free. It was as if the great god had guided him toward his own island to cast him ashore, untouched but for the scrape on his side where the shark’s rough skin had hit him. The great shark gods heard my pleas, he thought, and the story of Liko will forever be told in a chant documenting my greatness. My people will sing my story, and pass it on from generation to generation, making me immortal! Many warriors from both islands had perished in the great channel, some from spear thrusts and the crushing, tearing blows of their enemies’ war clubs, but many more had been taken by the ravenous sharks. And on that day of death and mourning, Liko had become immortal. A gust of wind brushed his face, awakening him from his daydream, and he looked up at the black clouds bearing down on him. Slinging the net with the two plump moi over his shoulder, he sang his chant as he ran through the woodrose and palms separating the jungle from the beach. Before taking the jungle path to the village, he would pick some breadfruit melons for his family and his betrothed. “Like a God. Like a God. In the midst of a great war, Liko was thrown into the sea. Terrified warriors screamed as sharks fed on them. Aieee! Aieee! Liko, like a god, was not harmed. Liko, like a god, was not harmed. Mako saved him and let him pass. Kauhuhu, the Halawa god shark saved him and let him pass. A Miracle! A Miracle! Liko is like a God!” *** Awakened by the windblown sand stinging his face, Felipe de Córdoba moaned, “Agua . . .” He had to find water. Though his knee joints ached, he forced his battered body to stand, and just as he turned his grimacing face upward, something smacked against his eye . . . a fat raindrop, followed quickly by several others. He opened his mouth, feeling the blissful wetness on his swollen tongue and parched throat. “Gracias, mi Salvador,” he cried out after gulping down the first thirst-quenching trickle. And even though the liquid stung in the salt-coated cracks of his lips, and every movement of his body sent painful signals to his brain, he didn’t care. Spreading his arms, he cried, “Ya estoy vivo!—I am alive!” The fresh rainwater tasted better than the finest Andalusian wine. He licked his hands, slurping from them, and as the rain’s intensity increased, he faced the storm and leaned forward into the wind, his open mouth catching the drops. *** Liko came to where a coral isthmus rose several feet above the beach, forming a spit where the forest ran to the water’s edge. He crossed the narrow strip of jungle and stopped before venturing onto the open beach. Cautiously he peered out from behind a large fern to make sure no enemies had made land. He was utterly unprepared for the sight he beheld. Liko stared, frozen in awe. He could not believe his eyes. It was a god, leaning forward, provoking the anger of the approaching god’s exhalations, consuming the spears of water sent its way. To Liko’s further amazement, the storm’s rage abated suddenly. Was this an apparition? It was as if this strange god had devoured the demon god’s onslaught. No one, in all the stories he could recount, had ever seen anything like this. This god was tall, with pale skin, and—strangest of all—hair on his face. Liko watched the tall, skinny stranger stretch his arms up toward the sky. But what was that? He seemed to be wearing a band of the golden sun god’s skin around his neck. Surely, Liko thought, it would be another sign of my greatness if I can capture such a god. There was only one way, he decided: charge and subdue him. He recalled, when he was a young boy, his grandfather telling him, Act fierce! Growl like a wild pig, and threaten your adversary while always moving toward him. Scream louder, take command, channel your fear into rage and aggression, and you will make him fear you—and conquer him. Your fear will have made you the stronger. *** Too late, out of the corner of his eye, Felipe saw the lone figure running toward him. And before he could react, he was tackled, crushed to the ground, slamming his head so hard that he almost fainted away. He saw the crude but lethal wooden knife at his throat, felt it puncture his skin. “No!I am a friend! A friend!” Felipe yelled, pleading with his arms outstretched, but the warrior only increased the pressure of his grip. *** “Aaieeee! Aaaaargh!” Liko screamed at the lesser god, hoping he would not vanish. He knew he had to best him with sound—His grandfather had told him it was the way to gain the advantage. Liko was proud that his voice boomed louder than any in his village. But he had never used it in combat with an enemy—or a god. Liko was afraid he would be killed. “I surrender!” the pale god screamed. Liko knew he had won the encounter when he saw the god lie back, unmoving. He breathed a sigh of relief. He didn’t want to kill this god—only to subdue him, prevent his escape, and bring him to the village, where once again the people would know of Liko’s greatness. If he should die, he may come back as a greater god and kill Liko. But take the god to the village, and another chant would be sung to document Liko’s immortality and elevate him to the status of a great leader. Slowly releasing his grip, he motioned the god to get up and move along the jungle path. *** With the savage’s knife at his back, Felipe passed under enormous green fronds and towering trees, stumbling now and again on the uneven ground. Praying that he was not about to be eaten by savages, he reached up to his neck to touch his cross and pray for his life. With a horrified shock, he realized that it was gone. He remembered clutching it when the sea threw him onto the beach. Looking back, he pointed toward the beach. “My crucifix . . . it must have torn loose,” he said to his uncomprehending captor. “I’m lost without it. My grandmother gave it to me when I was a child, and I’ve worn it ever since. I must go back and find it. I must go back,” he said, pointing at the golden crescent moon medallion at his throat. Thinking the native understood, Felipe started back toward the beach. “Arghhhhh!” the savage screamed, and jabbed the knife forward, pricking the skin on Felipe’s back. “Hijo de la . . . !” Felipe shouted, whirling around, but the warrior’s knife was suddenly at his throat. He understood: he must obey or have no chance at survival. Reluctantly, he turned and walked, just ahead of the knife, in the direction the savage pointed. Green and yellow birds, darting from bush to tree, cried shrill warnings of the approaching warrior and his captive. Felipe had no trouble walking where the path was mostly flat, but where he had to ascend muddy inclines, his feet slipped along the wet tree roots and banged against rocks and boulders. He prayed the journey would end soon, and hoped he wouldn’t be sacrificed to some pagan god. Blood oozed from a thousand tiny cuts, and his heavily callused soles, softened from his ordeal in the sea, were raw and bleeding. But he kept moving forward, ever aware of the prodding knife at his back. Certainly his mortal end was near. Sapped of energy, he stumbled dizzily forward. Flecks of light merged and grew into blackness, his vision blurring from the salty, stinging sweat running into his eyes. But still the knife prodded him on. He struggled but missed lifting his leg over a large fallen tree, and fell forward, landing hard. But up he scrambled, just ahead of the relentless poking knife. Just in front of them, Liko heard the familiar trickle of a cool stream that crossed the path. He was thirsty and needed a drink, even if his captive did not. But then again, perhaps he did thirst, since he appeared as a man. Liko tucked the knife into his thong and pushed hard against the god’s back, sending him to his knees at the water’s edge. *** When the native’s right arm pointed toward the water and he cupped his hands and brought them up to his mouth, Felipe understood that he was motioning for him to drink. Merciful God, thank you, he thought, nodding his head vigorously. And when the native nodded likewise, Felipe knew that they had made their first communication. He gulped the water like a man possessed, and at last, his thirst satisfied, he lay back to rest. He closed his eyes to welcome the darkness. *** Liko moved closer and leaned in for a better look at the piece of the sun around the god’s neck. Dare he touch it? Only a great god could do so and not be burned. *** Felipe could feel the savage’s eyes watching him. Cracking one eye open, he caught the native staring at the medallion around his neck. In his exhaustion, he flashed back to when the gold was plundered. Now that my master perished in the storm, the plan will remain a mystery to all but me. The medallion my master entrusted me with gives the location of the gold, and the gold is now mine. I dedicated my life to my master, and the reward of twenty years’ loyal service will make me rich beyond my dreams. But it will all mean nothing if I don’t survive. I must survive. I must! Felipe ’s thoughts drifted back to his harrowing ordeal—and his ship’s fate. . . . *** He looked out through the darkness, sure he had caught sight of land in the distance. Frantic crewmen reefed the sails as the wind screamed with a force that whipped the sea with hell’s own fury. Felipe knew they were doomed. As the wind wailed and the black storm raged, the mainmast splintered, spilling its rigging and killing several sailors. The ship had been moving aimlessly, blind, its floating compass needle washed away by a giant wave. Felipe heard the shrill, screaming voice of the gale and saw terror in the faces of the remaining men, heard their faint screams as, one by one, they were thrown into the sea. He had tried to find his master, but he, too, was gone. Finally, the ship rode up the crest of a colossal wave, which threw it down, splitting it apart like dry leaves in a winter windstorm. Felipe screamed a final prayer when he felt the timber he clung to being ripped away, catapulting him into the mountainous seas. The undulating debris of the ship scattered with each monstrous new wave. Breaking the surface, Felipe spit the choke of salt water from his lungs, fighting to stay afloat, and grasped on to a curved floating timber that looked to be from the ship’s keel. Amazingly, he was not alone, for there, clinging to life on the same timber, was the ship’s first mate. But it was not to be, for after the storm had passed and the elation of their survival was overtaken by exhaustion, a terrified scream pierced the black, moonless night. It was the last earthly sound from his fellow castaway. It was over in seconds, and Felipe knew he would never rid his mind of the image of the severed arm wound in the rigging on the timber. Nor would he ever forget the scream as the great, dark creature brushed past him, carrying away its human meal. Felipe, resigning himself to the same fate, had made peace with his Savior, yet here he was in this savage eden—captured, yes, but miraculously alive. He must try to communicate with the heathen again. And if that failed, perhaps he could tempt him to come closer to examine the medallion. It might present an opportunity to escape. Feeling a surge of strength return to him after drinking the water, Felipe focused his eyes on the savage staring at his medallion. Pointing at the shining disk, he said, “Gold . . . this is precious gold.” ***

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Fifteen year old Samantha Hyde's father, Dr. Cody Hyde, is a Crypto zoologist. A monster hunter. Together with her best friend MG, they are searching for irrefutable proof of the existence of a real live monster. But there is a problem. Not only do they wish to find a monster, they MUST find one, and soon. When Cody's wife (Samantha's mother) is killed in a car accident with Cody behind the wheel, Cody's Mother-in-Law, the wealthy Constance Alden decides to have her revenge. She brands Cody a lunatic monster hunter and an unfit father. Alden sends a ruthless bounty hunter after Samantha and her father. If she gets her hands on Sam, she'll take her from her father...forever. Cody's only hope, to find a monster, before a monster finds them. This is the first in a series. I welcome any and all comments.

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my story begins in thracia 44AD during the thracian/roman wars. it describes early thracian life focusing om the thracian leader Hermious and his family. Future chapters will make a connection with the present day via a school teacher called Olivia. it follows her on a journey of discovery to bulgaria were she understands the meaning behind the gold bracelet she wears. she falls in love with a bulgarian archeologist and together they discover both her past and her possible future.

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Rick and Bobo - Two brothers: one a genius, one not. -- What would you do if you suddenly had way too much money? After the usual thrills, if you got bored enough, and happened to be two movie fanatic brothers, you might just try to become a superhero. -- -- This is a 100k word superhero/comedy adventure and is the first in a 4 book series. In addition to critiquing the content, if you find any typos or grammatical errors, please let me know. -- -- This story is written in 3rd perso omni, although I have brought my narrator in too late. That being said, if you notice any pov issues that sound awkward even though there is a narrator, please point them out, and if you would, suggest a fix. Thank you!

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Beautiful, talented, and about to inherit – Why is Sarah’s heart in turmoil...? Sarah Miller, the new darling of the Chamber Music Society, the protégée cellist of their in-house Quartet, receives rave reviews for her first series of concerts. She has just buckled her last term at New York’s prestigious music academy of Julliard when a hit-and-run driver strikes her down and disrupts her plans. Luckily unscathed, engagements still need postponing until proper exercises can restore agility and full mobility to her bruised wrist. While the melody is interrupted, Sarah meets up with the formidable Spinner brothers. The younger Mark, handsome and charming, sweeps her off her feet. The elder Julian, black sheep, black belted, and daunting black mood enjoys badgering and humiliating her. Her wrist recovered, playing music again, Sarah wonders which exercises will mend a bruised ego and an aching heart. ...Perhaps it’s because she is unworldly, unsophisticated – an orphan raised by tutors and nannies who ran to the bright lights of New York City...only to slam into the dark heart of Julian Spinner.

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This is an adventure story in which an eleven year old girl finds herself in another world and through a series of journeys manages to change the way that world is run. Currently I'm working on what I hope to be a close to final draft, and I need a lot of feedback on the final chapters.

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Survival stories are a dime-a-dozen, people get lost in the woods and are normally rescued after a few weeks of surviving the dangers of the great outdoors, This story will come with a twist,, a supernatural twist — at least I think that's where it's heading. Let me know what you think of the story line so far, please. Does it peak your interest? Do you want to read more? I would appreciate any and all critiques regarding all components of the story. And please, don't be afraid to be brutal — I can take it!

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Seattle is a great place full of diversity. After exploring a nearby island, I decided to write about our adventures getting to and from, along with what the island is like. This is a fluff piece written more for the practice of writing, than anything else. Any and all feedback is welcome!

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Valarie has lived a loveless life of compromise. Everyone she's every cared for has lied and hurt her. But she stumbles upon a piece of paper that puts her life in danger. In the race to save her life, she finds the courage and strength to finally be free of the pain she has held inside of her for so long. Warning: sexual content

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Flights & Falls is #3 of an ongoing series. The main protagonist Cal Dion is a self-doubting detective with the RCMP, recuperating from a car crash and trying to prove himself fit. POV slides between him and various other main players throughout. Being a series, character build-up is more stretched out than a one-off novel. In this story a traffic fatality becomes the catalyst for a gamelike spate of assaults and murders. I would appreciate any help with fixes. I know it needs work but can no longer spot the sore points myself! Thank you.

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In his struggle to save his company, a young chief executive ends up fighting to save his life. This near future tale addresses the key elements of what constitute real power in society, loyalty and honour as opposed to money and violence. ************* I am looking for feedback on individual chapters, especially ones that haven't received any reviews. On things like grammer, structure, character and dialogue, as well as an indication of where the chapter stands on the boring barometre. (Revised Title; 16/02/08)

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"The Black Forest" is a short story about two young teenagers that are best friends. Their spirit for adventure while on their summer break is what takes them to a forbidden place know to the entire town as the Black Forest.

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My first crack at Science Fiction. However, it is written, step by step, to appear completely logical with no aliens, monsters, apparitions, etc. Since it concerns time travel, I've been advised that it would definitely be set in the Science Fiction genre. Check out the tags for the variety in the plotting.

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Alimar is a 14 year old boy who has led a simple life. He has had a reoccuring dream of an intense battle. Finally, he realizes that he knows someone from the dream and sets out to get some answers. The answers he gets sends him on a quest of epic preportions.

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An adventure story for young readers when Ken Carter and Allison Smith discover the secret mystery of the emerald pool.

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I am looking for any and all feedback. This story is part of collection called "The Cracker Chronicles," a compilation of adventures of a group of guys who have been friends since elementary school. It is a true story and these are real guys. I look forward to your input.

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Redemption, Arkansas is a small country town where things aren't always what they seem and the people never are...

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Zhang's new contact in the Chinese community in Singapore is a mysterious girl. Unknown to him she follows him back to the villa.

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This is Chapter 3 of the novel. Zhang gets lost in the city and meets an intriguiing girl.

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A story which grew out of my ocean flash attempt. Much longer, much more detailed and with action figures included. Pirates are bad.

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THANKS TO ALL THE INPUT I RECEIVED THE LAST TIME I POSTED THIS, I HAVE SPENT SIX MONTHS RE-EDITING AND TAKEN WHAT WAS A 200,000 WORD NOVEL DOWN TO A 113,000 WORD NOVEL. YOU WERE ALL CORRECT, IT WAS WAY TOO LONG. ANYWAY, HERE WE GO AGAIN:- Redemption Don’t Come Cheap opens in Brooklyn in 1964, after three nine-year-old boys from diverse backgrounds view the movie Goldfinger for the twentieth time. Later they see absolutely no problem in emulating Mr. Bond’s movie and painting the eighteen-month-old sister of one of the boys, bright red from neck to toes. The baby survives in good humor and for two of the boys, the repercussions of their punishment are maybe just, for the third it is simply tragic. The aftermath rips their friendship apart, throws their lives onto very different courses and the boys ultimately grow to distrust and dislike each other. They barely talk for thirty years; until a break-in at a local pet store, a strange twist of fate and a series of letters from the grave finally start to work, and all three men are inexplicably drawn back to the scene of the ‘baby painting,’ simultaneously. Once they meet again, they face up to old truths, reveal multiple secrets and nothing is ever what it seems for very long. When a brand new shared predicament makes it clear at least one of them needs to be a scapegoat and die, they begin a fight for personal survival. Their epic story involves multiple pet thefts from a local Mafia boss, a language-challenged priest who pays dearly for insulting the pope, a drunken monkey with a very bad attitude, an international diplomatic incident, the repeated theft of some very unlucky diamonds, abduction, subtle deceit, public humiliation, bare-faced lying, cheating, murder in abandon, accidental serial pet-o-cide, a trip through the Twilight Zone and finally, for one of them, personal redemption.

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A group of amateurs meet to form Bittengood Security, which will market spying devices and do small jobs for the F.B.I. The newly formed group sets up operation in Dr. Kurt Bittengood's animal hospital. They soon get dragged into much deeper involvement into the investigation of Al Queda. The group grows in size to include computer hackers, an expert of criminal pshchology and explosives experts. While monitoring conversations from an Al Qaeda safe house, they discover a plot to attack the New York Stock Exchange and destroy the Lincoln Tunnel.

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Beloved, aging comedian Buddy White signs a deal to play Vegas for one final performance, a fantastic send-off segueing into a well-deserved retirement. He wants to give his loyal audience a last memorable performance. Without warning he is shuffled off to Hell by mistake. When the misanthrope demon that grabbed him realizes the error, he abandons him outside the gate. Buddy can't get in. So he sets off to find his way back home. He follows the Acheron upriver on a journey that grows increasingly bizarre. Meanwhile, Hell's authorities learn of the blunder and send out a posse to round up the errant comedian. At the same time, Heaven discovers the mistake and dispatches a Chorus of Angels to find Buddy and rush him to Heaven. Buddy is determined to elude them all and get back to Earth. He's never missed a show or broken a promise in his entire professional life and he isn't about to start now. The prospect of a dead comedian playing to a live audience in Vegas would badly upset the status quo so Heaven and Hell join forces, determined to stop him. As Buddy perseveres, his natural cheer and success at evading the bungling bureaucrats of the afterlife begins to bring hope to the damned. By degrees he finds himself at the head of a revolution. All Buddy wants is to go home.

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Inspired by mishmont's diary, I decided to share this with my friends--a blow-by-blow account of an amazing adventure. Since we are, at the very least, a year out from departure, the entries will be few and far between, but I want you to share this with me. If it really happens, it will be my next novel!

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In the semi-small town of Cedar Creek, some people don’t care to lock their doors, even though the woods hold secrets and the children are terrified to venture into them. The warm sense of security is shattered for Majesty Alistair, a feisty but grief-stricken teen, when she uncovers a mass murder plot deep in the thick. She struggles to find and defeat the would-be-killers before they act, but they have an agenda far bigger than she ever assumed. Violence rocks the town, leaving residents reeling and drawing Majesty into the middle of it all. With danger always pressing, police seemingly getting nowhere and those closest to her looking guilty, she continues hunting and charges into an evil web, but the truth and her actions threaten to haunt her forever, especially since she’s left with blood on her hands, the blood of someone she loves.

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What makes a human, human? Are heroes born, bred, or created?

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To whom does The People's Champion belong? The people or himself? That's the question foundling(orphan) Jakund Frey'lnd, a gifted young swordsman and war hero dubbed "Kid Blade," struggles with as he battles the ferocious Gothari and learns that his fame as warrior makes him a target for those looking to make a name for themself as well as an unwilling player in the games of the powerful. This is a Young Adult Fantasy, filled with humor and action, designed to appeal to all ages.

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The fighting Father. Defender of the weak, Protector of the innocent and Guardian of the Faith.

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The true story of a cute little dog who came into our lives one fine day, only to go out of it again. This tale is set in India, my homeland...

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In the Amazon jungle a group of individuals undergo a rescue mission. What they find is a race for their lives and they are hunted every step. What is it that chases them, the mythological Curupira, or could it be something far worse.... I have not been dedicating as much time as I had hoped for this so I'm really going to buckle down. At this point, I want to get the story moving forward. I know there are some rough spots and I appreciate whenever someone points them out to me. As the chapters progress there may be some patches that seem like they aren't fully flushed out yet, that's intentional because I have plans to return and work on the scene, include some backstory, or clarify some foreshadowing that is needed.

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Two forces drive Harrison Cody to trek from New England to Chicago on foot: a bewildering pixie named Glimmer, and Claudia, the voice on the radio who may be the only other human still alive.

Static Mayhem, a mainstream novel that weaves elements of Fairy Tale, Science Fiction and Horror into a contemporary setting, tells his story. Harrison's journey reveals a North America whose human population has been replaced by dinosaurs, demons and dragons, and whose infrastructure has been reduced to a smattering of buildings holding artifacts from Earth's past and future. For all the surreal obstacles of his environment, his greatest challenge proves to be the care of two young survivors, separately orphaned and in clear need of a parent. Their eventual arrival in Chicago is punctuated by his arrest, and after clearing himself and establishing a life in this new cradle of civilization, he finds that his unanswered questions pale in importance to his new family.

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COMMERCIAL FICTION *I'M UPDATING POSTS AS I REACTIVATE CHAPTERS, SO IT MAY TAKE A WHILE TO GET ALL 50 CHAPTERS BACK UP. On the advice of several people, I'm reactivating this for publicity sake.* Two girls quest to live an extraordinary life. A little humor, a little mystery, a little chick lit. PLEASE BEGIN AT CHAPTER ONE

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In 1957, a supposed Brazilian friend with an ulterior motive lures a young American to Brazil in order to take advantage of a get-rich-quick-scheme. Brian Scherer swallows the bait, and plunges into an adventurous odyssey. But step-by-step after his arrival in South America, he becomes entangled in a web of treachery, smuggling, sexual romps, plus an international kidnapping, all of which, causes a bitter diplomatic confrontation between the United States and Brazil.

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Rhiannon, prodigal daughter of the king of New Fairy, has suffered a terrible curse. Having humiliated a witch, she must suffer a unique shame--she must go naked, regardless of the weather or social situation. These are the stories of how she reclaims her dignity and fights the evil of men, and her own inner conflicts.

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