- Registered: 05-03-2010
- Posts: 43
A reply to Kiwi and the TNBW family
Kiwi, Thank you for your kind posting last August. I have suffered rejection lately from the now literature elite. In the most part because I just hate it when the literary surgeons come out to amputate my metaphors. Too often its not what they can give, it's what they want to remove. Even at the price of success, I chose not to be sculptured into an Ivy league poet. This is such a difficult burden to carry. Fifteen years ago, I was climbing the ladder of success. And I was going to make it. And when I passed the middle point of that ladder and looked towards the top of it, I could almost see clouds moving and a second ladder. However on the bottom of that ladder were my children, left in an abusive situation with their alter parent. My kids were held hostage and the building was on fire. I felt as if I was five feet below a Pulitzer and thirty feet above them. I had to crawl back down that ladder, into the fire to rescue them. I left the stages, the newspapers and the cameras behind. I spent every cent I had to heal them. I have been mothering and fathering them for the last ten years. The money I once had is no more. Today I only have the vision. I don't even know if I will see that ol' ladder again or if I have the same climbing strength. But my children are healing, well and strong. I performed over two-hundred live shows in those early years. There was a lot of fan fare. I had no parents. No grandparents. I was disconnected from the few brothers and sisters that I had. So much to face alone- Never a family member at any show. I had a marriage that would make JOB feel sympathy for me. Letters, newspaper clippings tell me what could have been. The smiles of my children tell me what is. Discovering TNBW was a huge beacon of light. There are so many great writers on this site. Thank you KIWI for all the concerns that you have expressed. In a few years, my oldest daughter will go to college. She likes to write. I wouldn't even trade a Pulitzer for what would have been had I not gone down that ladder to save she and her sisters and brothers. Now I too am seeking to be healed from a war that has lasted two decades. One of my strangest archives that I possess is a three page hand written letter from Gwen Brooks, who won a Pulitzer prize. In a long handwritten letter she warned me about the burden of writing. She told me I had plenty of time to become a great writer and that when I reached eighty I would understand what she meant. She has forty honorary doctorates. Maybe one day it will make sense. I wish you Kiwi and all others reading this poem a Happy Holidays. Thank you all for a second chance to write. You are all All Stars to me.
- flowing pencil
- Registered: 02-04-2008
- Posts: 5979
Re: A reply to Kiwi and the TNBW family
Ellis.. you grace us by being on this site. Not only with your writing but gracing us with your 'soul'... Write for yourself first and for the source of your talent. Not everyone who walks planet Earth can write let alone write poetry/prose/novels etc etc... it takes a certain breed. We are programmed to write by some force, we will struggle and reach.
You writing is 'different' and in a great creative way. It sets new standards I think and being unique comes with a burden but one I would love to shoulder. Doesn't take away from other writers who write tremendous and moving work. You are just you. I would give my left...? to write like you but then I would have to explain that to my man!.
It is soooooooo wonderful to have you grace this site again. I mean that. The day will come! 'I know that writer!"
You are truly blessed with talent. I expect 'huge' things from you.
So honored to call you 'friend' and fellow writer.
..."With the breakdown of the Medieval system, the gods of Chaos, Lunacy, and Bad Taste gained ascendancy" Ignatius Reilly..."Confederacy Of Dunces"
- From: Sydney
- Registered: 03-05-2008
- Posts: 1114
Re: A reply to Kiwi and the TNBW family
Ellis, you are such a talented poet and it is my pleasure to tell you so. You have given me so much pleasure from reading your beautifully written poems. Fabulous topics and subjects, some of which I recognise and relate to and some of which open completely new worlds to me - always with passion and a journey. Editing is something a writer and poet must put up with and as for the literary surgeons, sometimes they have a point. Not sure if they do in your case but, I have seen how a phrase can be turned and hola! genius results despite one's hesitation. Well, that's a pathetic thing to say. Hesitations? Screaming denials more like for we poets and writers write those words and phrase them with deliberate purpose. I have found better poets than I suggesting a rhythm or a word change and it's like - is your mind mired in mud? Where is your sense of musicality of rhythm of passion? Can't you see that to switch one word will change everything - destroy everything. I can't even put an exclamation mark after that for it would change the subtle emotion I wish to draw.
Will an editor understand that or will the poet have to understand that to lose a little subtlety early on will lead to total freedom later on.
My Xmas wish for you is that you believe enough in yourself to let a little bit go by so that later you find total freedom.
Just don't give up Ellis.
If you don't have a dream, how you gonna make your dream come true..
from the Bali Hi sequence from South Pacific.